DH Is Back To Work Today & Thoughts Re: TTC

Angelmommy3612

Hello Everyone,

Well today is my Eric's first day back to work, i saw the pain in his eyes this morning, and i could tell he did not want to leave me. I know its best for us to continue with our lives, i have 3 1/2 months off of work so its going to be lonely without him here with me. (i would rather go back to work earlier, but d/t my line of work, my boss prefers me to stay off for the alloted time)

Eric and i decided to bring brodys ashes home with us, he is peacefully in his nursery and Eric and i find that when we go in there in the evening and pray its really relaxing for us, and its also helping us along in our healing journey.

We are continuing to speak about ttc again, physically i feel as though i am ready to be intimate again, but i am so scared that we will suffer a loss again so i want to make sure i get another all clear from my MD again. (she said we were absolutely fine to try again a couple of weeks ago....still way to early at that point) We know that Brodys death was caused by a cord accident and that all of my exams and tests came back with no issue...but i am still so worried. I know stress wont help, but i also know trying for baby #2 may help heal us even more.

We will see what time brings...i know with Brody and God watching over us, we will eventually bring healthy babies home, and it will happen when the time is right.

Im hoping everyone has a good week.

xo

p.s. does anyone know if it is possible to change my username on the bump? its still from when i was pregnant with Brody...i am a mommy now, so id love to change it.

dandywarhol

It is difficult when your support system has to head back to work.  I hope your day has gone quickly and peacefully. It is too bad that your boss can't work with you to get you back sooner.  Do you have any thoughts as to what you're going to do during your time away from work?    

I think having Brody's ashes in his nursery is a nice idea.  We have Sylvie's ashes in our bedroom.  I'm not sure they will stay there forever but at the moment I can't think of a better place.  

The TTCAL journey is a doozy.  I wish you quick and complete success.  We were also scared about suffering another loss (and frankly it still is a concern for me) but you can't live your life (or much of a life) if you live in fear, at least that's what I tell myself.   

 

barrona

I just wanted to let you know that I'll be thinking about you today. I remember when my husband went back about 2 weeks after we lost our little girl and I was so nervous without him. I tried to keep myself busy at home. I started a scrapbook for our baby girl and also preoccupied myself with lots of cleaning and cooking. I don't know if activities like this will help you, but maybe find something that might distract you from the fact that he isn't there and it will help just a bit. As for ttc, my husband and I just started. I feel exactly as you said; I'm so worried, but at the same time I know it will help us heal. Be easy on yourself and whatever you and your husband decide is the right choice for both of you. I'm sending lots of prayers and love your way.

Mjmksb04

I hope today went smoothly for both of you. It is hard to re-enter the working world after experiencing a loss like this, so hopefully your husband isn't too drained after tonight. You probably have to e-mail the bump gods to find out about changing your name.

nuttycoconut

I hope you had a good day today! I know how hard it was for me when my DH went to work. I missed him so much and he did come home drained because while I was home in my little cocoon he was stressed at work and had to deal with lots of questions/dumb comments about our babies. At the same time, he had distractions while I had none.

I was home for 9 weeks and went walking, watched a lot of Redbox movies, went to lunch, cleaned and organized, went to acupuncture, watched daytime tv, and some days just called my DH and cried. I was actually a little bit less productive than I hoped but I'm okay with that. The time off was really nice and I wish I was still off from work.

I'm not sure if you can have your name changed. I had to make a new account and then email them and had them delete the old one.