Too warm in moby

namara5532

I've started baby wearing at night as DS really doesn't want to be put down, even when he's supposedly dead asleep.  It's the only way I get any semblance of sleep at this stage.

This evening after a few hours in the wrap, he wakes up to feed.  And I notice the poor little guy's shirt was wet from sweat.  All he was wearing was a shirt, his diaper, and some socks.

Is there some trick to keeping him cooler as we sleep?  Did I perhaps tie the wrap too tight?

nosoup4u

I don' t think it's safe to sleep while you're wearing your baby. Even having him lie on your chest, while you lie down on a bed is a better idea. Are you breastfeeding? Learning how to nurse while lying down was a life-saver for me and my kids.

pitterpatter129

nosoup4u:

I don' t think it's safe to sleep while you're wearing your baby. Even having him lie on your chest, while you lie down on a bed is a better idea. Are you breastfeeding? Learning how to nurse while lying down was a life-saver for me and my kids.

  I definitely would not wear the baby while sleeping.  That isn't safe at all - the baby could suffocate.  The first few weeks are the hardest by far!  I remember sleeping on the couch with the moses basket on the coffee table next to me or sleeping sitting up on the couch with the baby on the boppy pillow (probably not a much better choice!)  You'll get into a better sleep routine really quickly.  If you decide to bedshare, you can nurse and sleep at the same time.  Make sure you do a lot of research on how to safely bedshare though. 

 

namara5532

How would it be any more unsafe than letting him sleep in it while I walk around the house?  I lay down on the couch on my side and make sure there's no fabric over his face.  I use the wrap moreso to make sure he doesn't roll off the couch, and I feel like it's a more secure option than falling asleep with him in my arms when I may not wake up to catch him if he rolled.  It was someone who baby wears all day who suggested wearing him at night.  If I had the option, he'd be sleeping in his crib, but he hates to be put down.  And we have a pillowtop mattress that doesn't quite fit the bedframe, so bedsharing isn't an option for us.

nosoup4u

Because he can suffocate, or overheat, or you could roll on him, and you won't notice. Take the pillowtop off your mattress, put him in a swing, or wear him until he falls asleep, and then take him out and nurse him back down. You could go buy a cheapo twin mattress, and co-sleep with him on that. But wearing a baby while you're asleep is a bad idea.

Can your partner help you with nighttimes? They were absolutely miserable with my first son, it never seemed like he slept, either. It definitely helped to take turns with who was up with him, and then just co-sleeping on a bed worked out best for us.   

namara5532

By pillowtop, I mean the mattress itself has a pillowlike cushion attached.  It does not come off.  Also, like I mentioned, the mattress doesn't quite fit the frame.  There's a huge gap between the headboard and mattress.  Bedsharing is not an option.  It's not something I feel comfortable with even if we had the right bed to do so.  Also, DH works nights, so trading off with him is not even an option.

For the record, I constantly wake up when I wear him to check on him.  He's still at the point where he's waking for feedings every 3 hours anyway, so I don't have the time to get into a deep sleep.  I do hear you about the suffocation risk and do sleep with him in my arms during the day.  As soon as I can get him to sleep in his swing or crib, I don't plan to wear him at night anymore.  I only started doing it because I was desperate for some sleep while DH was at work.

I would still like an answer to how I can keep him cool in the moby though.  I do plan to use it while we're out grocery shopping today, and I'd hate for him to be hot and uncomfortable.

nosoup4u

namara5532:

By pillowtop, I mean the mattress itself has a pillowlike cushion attached.  It does not come off.  Also, like I mentioned, the mattress doesn't quite fit the frame.  There's a huge gap between the headboard and mattress.  Bedsharing is not an option.  It's not something I feel comfortable with even if we had the right bed to do so.  Also, DH works nights, so trading off with him is not even an option.

If you are sleeping next to your baby, no matter where it is, you are bedsharing/co-sleeping. If the only bed you have is the one with a pillowtop, even if it's not ideal, it's still a better idea for you to lie down next to your baby on it (with pillows, sheets and blankets far from his head), so you can both get some rest. If there is space around the frame or against the wall, you can shove rolled-up towels around it to fill them in. Sleeping on a couch, or while holding him in your arms, are both unsafe co-sleeping practices, even if you think you're waking up every time he moves or makes noise.

From here: https://cosleeping.nd.edu/frequently-asked-questions/#22

"To be sure, infants should never sleep on recliners, couches or sofas, with or without adults wherein they can slip down (face first) into the crevice or get wedged against the back of a couch, or fall between pillow seat."

That sucks you're on night duty by yourself, and I can definitely understand the frustration of not being able to put the baby down, both my kids were like that. Like I asked before, have you tried side-lying nursing? My first son slept primarily on his side (he would fall asleep while nursing, and I'd leave him like that), which is an okay sleeping position for newborns. Is there anyone at all who can come help you out, maybe during the day, so you can get some rest without having to be with the baby?

namara5532

Forgive me if I seem really frustrated by all this.  I don't want to intentionally put him in danger, but I feel like all the options are being swept out from under me.  What I meant with on the couch was him in my arms on the couch, but you're probably going to tell me sleeping in my arms while I lightly sleep is unsafe too, or that my attempts to transition him to a swing until he's comfortable enough to try the crib is also unsafe.  I'm trying to not get all offended because I know you are trying to help, but I'm pretty sleep deprived and desperate, and I do appreciate the information as I try to figure out what set-up is going to be safest for everyone.

I've tried side lying feeding, and I've yet to make it work.  DS gets frantic when he's trying to latch and doesn't have the patience for me to get comfortable and then try to put his body in the right position.  On the couch propped up on a boppy is the only place that's worked for us for feedings.  My other aversion to bedsharing is that it wouldn't work for us long-term.  DH sleeps too deeply and moves a lot in his sleep.  Not to mention he's cold natured and needs a blanket on the bed.  Even if DH's schedule means he's not joining us in bed until 4am, long term that's too early to make LO start his day so daddy can sleep.

Perhaps this is the wrong board to be asking for this advice.  I meant to be just asking a question about the moby, but I guess it was irresponsible of me to even try cosleeping that way.  Thanks for clearing that up for me.

emolm

I don't think anyone was trying to be mean. The big danger with baby wearing (esp with super new little babes) is that they can suffocate so easily. It is so important to constantly be aware of how their heads are positioned (nose/mouth not blocked, chin not slumping against chest, etc, etc) and you cannot check and recheck and recheck those things while you are asleep. That's why it's fine for him to be asleep in the moby or whatever other carrier as long as you are awake to constantly check on him. All of the safety bits of baby wearing are really really important bc babies have died from improper wearing so he needs to be positioned correctly whether he's asleep or awake. 

 

Cosleeping/roomsharing is still better than nothing (imo) if you can't/won't bedshare. We're very anti bedsharing in our house but having the Rock n Play, then the cosleeper, then the side carred crib, and now the crib in the corner of the room works for us.  

 

Look into buying a Rock n Play from Fisher Price. We had a baby who needed (or wouldn't sleep at all) to be propped and that's how we made it through the first four months. I'll prob be in physical therapy from rocking that thing while laying on my stomach and trying to sleep....

 

You should wear less clothing and so should the baby. Try taking off his socks, too.