Baby Showers
Mrs.Saxy
member
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bonus gift...tacky?
Mrs.Saxy
member
in Baby Showers
I've been to showers before where the invite states, "Bring a book to help build Baby ABC's library."
Would it be tacky for me to do something like that? This would be in addition to a person bringing a registry gift...but I wouldn't put that info on the invite. I would assume people would know that.
I was thinking something like "Bring a book or a pack of diapers and win a gift card."
wdyt?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: bonus gift...tacky?
::takes a big breath::
Yes it would be tacky you can not tell some one what to get you and asking for a gift and anything else is gift grabby and greedy it is your job as the parent to get the child what ever they need not your family or friends.
::ahhhh...::
Any other questions?
On a side note this board really needs a newby link.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Join our wiki and tell us what your baby eats for finger foods.
Are you planning to register at Babies R Us? If you are, they have a section at the top where you can write notes, I believe. You could always put something there indicating that books would also be appreciated, but I think it needs to be indicated as another suggestion, not an expectation.
Clomid Cycle #1: 50mg = BFP
=Beautiful baby girl born May 23, 2009
TTC#2: BFP Cycle #1, no fertility meds!
Maybe you should skip the traditional bonus gifts and ask them to bring you some extra undies. I imagine you destroy quite a few keeping them as bunched and twisted as you do.
Yes, Newbie. If you'd take two minutes and look through the other posts on this page and the next you'd see this question is asked ad nauseum. If there was a newbie link (as she mentioned) there would be a chance some of the repeats would be weeded out. Think this question as our version of the first trimester "zomg---I ate sushi/lunchmeat/soft cheese/wine before I knew I was pregnant, did I hurt my baby?!?!", 2nd tri's gender annoucement threads and third trimesters "could these be contractions?" all wrapped into one.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Join our wiki and tell us what your baby eats for finger foods.
I was also looking for some other options and ideas like my friends on a more helpful board replied as they put "in lieu of a card, please write your sentiments in a children's book".
I've been on theknot/nest/bump since 2004 and I still have never understood the reason to bash a person because they have a different OPINION or thought. smh
eta: I did go back and look. Almost 3 weeks ago https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/60875385.aspx has some helpful info as to why this is a bad idea. None of the books can be returned since they're all written in....great advice.
Maybe you and Adam&Eve can become board Mods and start a newbie link since you two think it's such a good idea. Bookmark this post for reference.
Join our wiki and tell us what your baby eats for finger foods.
I'm quite relaxed, thanks though. You've been here a week and never seen any posts on the topic of asking for something specific or additional? You obviously need to work on your reading comprehension because these types of posts are everywhere. In addition, you seem confused about people expressing their opinions when you clearly asked for them. To be clear, you came here asking for opinions and are upset when you received them.
I digress, here are a selection of links for you to choose from. Most of them deal with specifically asking for an item or addressing specific gifts on an invitation, which are all under the same umbrella of general tackiness.
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/61271554.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/57926207.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/49453563.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/60873555.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/60911876.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/60875385.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/22099051.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/60607031.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/60498564.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/60581106.aspx
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/58946356.aspx
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Perhaps you should try doing what I do when I go to a board I'm not normally on. I click that little button that says "sort by recent post" and then you can see what topics are being actively discussed.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Tacky.
If the MTB wants books for her child, she should just register for them.
Join our wiki and tell us what your baby eats for finger foods.
Join our wiki and tell us what your baby eats for finger foods.
Yes, tacky. I know people do it, but that's not a reason to do it. You're already asking people to buy a gift and come to the shower. To ALSO then ask for another gift.... tacky.
And here's the thing - if, IF, I were to do the "bonus gift", it would actually come out of my overall budget for the gift. So, if I were going to spend $50 on a gift, well, now that's reduced because I'm now expected to bring a book or diapers.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
no gift card.
Yes you do need a newby link. Newby links are for posters who are new to a SPECIFIC BOARD. You said that you have only been here a week, that makes you new. Andplusalso I said "on a side note" meaning that because there are so many of "is fill in the blank tacky" posts other people would benefit as well and not get their panties in a twist.
And no Balls was not bored, she is just that good.
She should probably add the books she want to her registry. Otherwise she'll get a million Good Night Moon books with a million different inscriptions. haha There is no returning those. In theory it is kind of a cute idea...but when you really think about the logistics it doesn't work.
Also, I think it's more tacky to trash someone online than it is to be gift grabby. Come on ladies, can't we be supportive? Sheesh.
I refuse to be supportive of greediness. And there's nothing on this website requiring anyone to be supportive of any crazy ideas a bumpie throws out there.
Does "bonus gift" make anyone else think of Clinique Bonus Time? Lol.
The gift is a bonus to the mom to be. Certainly not a bonus to the gift buyer.
Holding a raffle doesn't make it any less tacky. This is a party for a loved one, not a charity raffle.
Yes..it's tacky.
There should NEVER EVER be any sort of message or request for additional gifts. Dressing it up with a cutesy idea to build the baby's library doesn't erase the tackiness. Tacky is tacky...you can't polish shlt, it's still shlt.
I don't think it's remotely tacky, you could say on the invite that you want either a bonus book, bonus gift of their choosing or bonus $10 - just make sure that you ask for an inscription on all of them so your guests know that it'll mean something to you for years to come - you should also be SUPER clear in your wording that the bonus should be in addition to the amount they would have normally spent on you so those cheapies don't stiff you for a good gift.
Problem solved.
I am not saying "SUPPORT TACKINESS!" but I am saying that we're on here for support and encouragement from other women. It's completely possible to answer her question and not completely shut her down and make her feel like an idiot. That's all I was saying when I was talking about being supportive.
Let's replay and summarize this situation, shall we?
OP: "I've seen this done, but I think it might be tacky. Is it tacky?"
Reply: "Yes, it's tacky. On a related note, can we get a sticky for the newbies so this question might not be asked a million times?"
"Yes"
"Yup, tacky"
Followed by a "zomg---this is a board for support! Why are youse guys so mean?!?"
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Don't you just love it when people give you the option to spend more money on them? It's so thoughtful of them!
If I wanted to buy diapers for someone, I would. No specific invitation to do so is required.
I'm not a fan. If I were to do that, I'd deduct the price of a book from the overall gift to you.
You can buy books SO cheaply at garage sales and consignment shops. DS must have a dozen books that were between 25 and 50 cents.
Eeeeeeek!
Best.Post.Ever. LOL. Hilarious.
I kind of like the optional diaper raffle though.
Join our wiki and tell us what your baby eats for finger foods.
Here's the thing, they have that option whether you specify it or not. If someone wants to get the MTB a book/diapers/whatever, they will, they don't need to be told or "given the option". Saying it's optional doesn't make it any less rude. No matter how you dress it up, buying "you" an extra pack of diapers is not fun for "me".
It's totally fun for me, Liz. I get to spend $20 so I don't feel awkward not participating in the big diaper raffle drawing in order to win last season's clearance soap from B&BW!
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Yeah, but we all know how much you like funky smelling soap!
True. I like it almost as much as I like hideous fake smelling candles I win when I fill out and address my own thank you cards. You know, the optional game where we win a fab prize *and* selflessly help the guest of honor at the same time! {Win-Win Squee}
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Join our wiki and tell us what your baby eats for finger foods.
Are you also gonna have guess how many jelly beans in the bottle and win a $.99 photo album? I love that game!
Just for you!
Lol you spoil me! My guess is 999.....am I right?
You are!!!! Here's your prize, it can hold our wedding pictures!!!
It's so pretty! It's gonna look great at the back of my closet!