How much traveling do you do around the holidays?

RobinSparkles214

I am at my wits end with all of the traveling that DH feels obligated to do around the holidays. We have had 6 years of carting our butts all over the state the entire month of December (and even into January).

When we just had one child it was not a problem. With two it just seems ridiculous.

His side alone has 4 Christmas celebrations he feels expected to attend. None are near by. All of it involves several hours in the car. My side is having one Christmas celebration, and we will probably stop by and visit with my Dad (since he lives in the same twon as my mom) before we head home.

This weekend DH thought it would be no problem on Saturday to make a 1.5 hour drive (to visit people we just celebrated with this past weekend), head back home another 1.5 hours, drop our kids at home (with my mom and aunt who both made sure to have off of work to come to our house & watch the kids so we could have a night alone), get ready for another party (that we have had scheduled with my very dear friend who is as close as a sister to me), drive 2 hours to get there (late of course), and spend the night there. We desperately need a date night. So YAY for an adults only party!

He then thought it would be a good idea and not stressful at all, to wake up super early, head 2 hours back home to get the kids to make another 2.5 hour drive up to see more family (with people we just saw this weekend and will see Christmas Eve), then make the 2.5 hour trip back home.

Talking about it with him always ends with me feeling like a scrooge and him saying "I look at it as more fun for the kids". Why?? Because they are a screaming effing mess that has been in the car for 8 fuccking hours in one day!! Yep that's fun for the kids. I just want him to see my point of veiw and I feel like every year it's the same conversation.

Rant over/

Anywho.....Is this the norm? How many places to you make an appearance at for the holiday? Am I just a raging biitch?? Tell me, I can handle it : )

DandelionMom

We used to do that too.  It was too much for the kids, and I get stressed out driving in the bad weather (plus figuring out what to do with the pets).  So now H's family gets one day and my side gets one day.  We don't go anywhere for Christmas eve or morning. 

It isn't always easy because his family likes to demand more time.  We just stay polite and firm and say, "we can't make it on xy days, we're looking forward to seeing you on z day!"

ETA: we do end up spending about 8 hours in the car over the holidays -- his family is 3 hours each way and mine is an hour each way.   

AnnapolisLari

That is fvcking crazy.

We travel from Ohio to CT every year for Thanksgiving at my cousin's. Christmas is our family and my mom in our home. Nice and calm and we can do things at our own pace.

When we lived close to other family, we would go over to my uncle's for dessert after dinner and maybe drop in on DHs sister, but they all lived in Annapolis. The longest it took to get to anyone's house was 15 minutes.

Jodi&Joe

I didn't read your post.  Sorry!

But we don't do any.  When I had kids, I made it clear to family that if they wanted to see us, they had to come to us.  Especially Christmas Day. 

So we see Joe's family on Christmas Eve (which happens to the their tradition anyway - they celebrate on Eve).  We alternate every other year - it's at our house or his parents' house. (We live about 15 minutes from each other).

Christmas Day - it's either my house or my older sister's house.  We alternate every other year.  (Again, we live about 15 minutes from each other).

Zenya

Every other year on Christmas day we travel 3 hours to my husband's side of the family for Christmas dinner.  Then we stay in a hotel that night so it's a fun trip.  Apart from that, none.  I think what your husband is requesting is beyond ridiculous!

RobinSparkles214

Jodi&Joe:

I didn't read your post.  Sorry!

But we don't do any.  When I had kids, I made it clear to family that if they wanted to see us, they had to come to us.  Especially Christmas Day. 

So we see Joe's family on Christmas Eve (which happens to the their tradition anyway - they celebrate on Eve).  We alternate every other year - it's at our house or his parents' house. (We live about 15 minutes from each other).

Christmas Day - it's either my house or my older sister's house.  We alternate every other year.  (Again, we live about 15 minutes from each other).

Don't worry. I wouldn't have read that huge wall of text either : )

I wish that I could get my husband to be on board with the "If you want to see us, come to us". It's strange that he actually *thinks* he enjoys himself. Yet he morphs from the normally fun, awesome daddy, into some short-tempered, irritable grouch.

 

surprise3rd

Sounds a little crazy to me.  Out of all that, I would only make the 2 hour adults only trip to party with friends, and definately NOT wake up early to drive 2 hours home and then spend another 5 hours in the car.  Tell DH if he wants to go and thinks it is fun with the kids that he should take them and you can stay home and wrap all the christmas presents:)

 We don't travel at all.  All our family is over 5 hours away so it isn't really an option.  Christmas Dinner we will drive 5 miles up the road to have dinner with DH's cousins and their grown children, his Sister and her two kids, and my parents are all coming here for the week of christmas.

I don't think you sound like a grinch, I think you sound like a reasonably thinking sane women who doesn't want your children 'locked' in a car for ours on end.

Good luck.