day care issue: how to handle? (longish, sorry)

mlf625

Ugh.  Okay, so the kids go to the daycare at our gym 3-4 days a week for an hour or two.  Up until recently the teachers seemed to love them, they got good reports at pick up time, yada yada.  The past week or so?  Not so much.  They got in trouble on Monday for not using their "walking feet" and the teacher actually came to get me and take them home.  Which seemed like overkill, but she was overwhelmed with a bunch of kids and not enough staff, I guess.  Whatevs.  Then, they have this rule that when you play with the trucks/cars, you have to be on your knees when pushing them around.  DS apparently won't listen to this rule, like ever.  He listens at home, I've made him do the same at home to keep it simple, and we go over the day care rules at home.  We discuss it on the way there and I reinforce how we have to be nice and follow rules so everyone stays safe and has fun, etc. Then we go, and inevitably, I pick him up and hear that he was in trouble for not staying on his knees.  Yesterday and today, I explained to them that if they were both good and didn't get into trouble, they'd get a treat afterward.  Fail both days, and TODAY I come and find out DD started in, too, and laughed when the teacher told her no, which made DS laugh and do it, too.  I guess they both had trucks taken away twice.  As the teacher is telling me this, Vivi runs over and grabs a truck and RUNS at me with it screaming "ON YOUR KNEES!"  Um, yeah.  Bye now. 

What do I do here?  They listen to me at home, but I think the teachers there think they're undisciplined maniacs, and I can tell they're starting to not like them, which makes me sad because they ARE good kids.  How do I help them follow the rules at day care?  I'd like to tell the teacher to just put the ^&%^$@#%^ trucks away for a week or so (because I know at least one other kid got in trouble for this today).  I feel like the bigger deal that's made of this, the more they think it's a funny thing to do, and let's be real - they're not biting people.  I'm getting annoyed, and I hate that every pick up lately is negative.

I guess I'm just looking for ways to help my kids act as sweet at the day care as they (uh, usually) do at home.  

ali-1411

They have to stay on their knees?  That's the most ridiculous rule I've ever heard.  Why?

mlf625

ali-1411:

They have to stay on their knees?  That's the most ridiculous rule I've ever heard.  Why?

Deargod, thanks for that response.  That's what I've been thinking and what my mom said when I called her about it, too.  I thought maybe it was some well-known thing we just didn't know  about.

But regardless, it's their rule, so I guess I have to make my kids obey it.  Right? 

ali-1411

mlf625:

ali-1411:

They have to stay on their knees?  That's the most ridiculous rule I've ever heard.  Why?

Deargod, thanks for that response.  That's what I've been thinking and what my mom said when I called her about it, too.  I thought maybe it was some well-known thing we just didn't know  about.

But regardless, it's their rule, so I guess I have to make my kids obey it.  Right? 

Uhhh. I guess?  Unless your kids want to Occupy Gym Daycare.

 

mcurban

MrsRosie:

ali-1411:

They have to stay on their knees?  That's the most ridiculous rule I've ever heard.  Why?

I'm guessing so they don't run along the ground pushing the trucks, slip, fall on their faces, and knock out teeth.

mlf - Are the teachers in there allowed to do timeouts or anything like that?

This. Jack used to put both hands on a truck and then run on his feet while pushing it out in front of him. Once that truck gets ahead of you, you face plant and don't have your hands to catch you. 

 

I have no suggestions. I would ask them to just put the trucks away, but they'd probably look at you like you were a crazy lady.

august8080

This might be an unpopular opinion, but I think there's such a thing as too many safety rules. Sometimes kids just need to be kids and sometimes that involves getting hurt and learning from it. I mean, I'm not advocating that they let them swing from the rafters and I certainly have, what I feel, are appropriate safety limits/rules with my son but that just seems a little overboard.........Sorry that's not really a helpful solution to your problem. I guess I'd do what mcurban suggested--it can't hurt to ask, right?

mcurban

august8080:

This might be an unpopular opinion, but I think there's such a thing as too many safety rules. Sometimes kids just need to be kids and sometimes that involves getting hurt and learning from it.

I hear what your saying, however, I respect that they are trying to minimize injury while in their care. 

When you face plant (I mean, truly hit the ground w/ your face w/ no hands to catch you), you do serious damage to either your teeth or your nose. Tommy had his face smashed into the ground, under my watchful eye, and it resulted in multiple x-rays at the dentist, along w/ the recommendation for two root canals under anesthesia. WITH our insurance, it was coming out to over 3k.  I know many parents who could/would go after the gym for that money. 

august8080

Yeah, I get that. And I know it's different when you're watching a group of someone else's kids vs making decisions for your own children when they're with you and I understand that daycare facilities have to have rules. I guess I was just commiserating with mlf that I would be frustrated by that rule as well.

My son loves to drive his trucks- I has never crossed my mind to institute a "knees only" rule and he's never been seriously injured (but maybe that's why I think it's silly--if he was frequently/seriously injured, I'd probably have a different opinion). Poor Tommy, that sounds painful

FeistyFille

mcurban:

MrsRosie:

ali-1411:

They have to stay on their knees?  That's the most ridiculous rule I've ever heard.  Why?

I'm guessing so they don't run along the ground pushing the trucks, slip, fall on their faces, and knock out teeth.

mlf - Are the teachers in there allowed to do timeouts or anything like that?

This. Jack used to put both hands on a truck and then run on his feet while pushing it out in front of him. Once that truck gets ahead of you, you face plant and don't have your hands to catch you. 

 

I have no suggestions. I would ask them to just put the trucks away, but they'd probably look at you like you were a crazy lady.

I get the safety issues.  I get that they're worried about liability.  But honestly?  Expecting a bunch of toddlers to only play with trucks while on their knees?  I'm surprised they get any of the kids to adhere to that rule.  And if they can't keep kids from running with the trucks, which I imagine would be difficult, if not impossible, why have them available as toys?  I'm sure there are tons of other options available to them as far as toys/activities go.  This plan seems a little optimistic on their part.

Of course, this does nothing to help you, mlf.  Aside from what pps have suggested, I got nothin'.

userdeleted

Huh, I really don't know. It sounds like you're doing everything you can. I honestly can't imagine being able to enforce a rule like that with a bunch of toddlers. I don't think I have the energy to make that rule at home, so you're already ahead of me there.

That sucks, I'm really sorry. 

mlf625

Eff.  Well, there goes my hope that my Bumpies had the magical answer.  Hmph. 

MrsRosie:

mlf - Are the teachers in there allowed to do timeouts or anything like that?

Yes, I told the lead teacher she could put the kids on TO if needed.  I know they've tried it and it wasn't terribly productive.  They don't work well for DS at home, either, unless I lock him in his room.

fjaril

I'd maybe take a break for a couple of days (sorry) from the gym. If they ask why, tell them it's b/c they are having trouble listening to the rules.

We've had to discus with H, that you can't hit or push friends (even when they do it first) at school. If you do, then you come home early. 

I know you talk about it with them, but not going might help it sink in a little more.

I'm not saying lay a guilt trip on them, just be factual. If you play with the trucks, you must drive on your knees. If you don't, we have to go home. 

 

mlf625

fjaril:

I'd maybe take a break for a couple of days (sorry) from the gym. If they ask why, tell them it's b/c they are having trouble listening to the rules.

We did that most of last week, but that's kind of my game plan for now- take a breather again.  ILs are in town all next week so the kids wouldn't be going with me, anyway.  Hopefully a little break will do the trick.   

SaraLouiseBride08

Ummm, I think the daycare is being ridiculous. I understand why they have that rule, but it's kind of like having a law that you can't enforce. Only worse, because adults are mature enough to understand that following the rules is for their own good. Kid's aren't.

I would never have the balls to, but someone needs to ask the daycare to find another toy option and put away the trucks. They are just making it hard on everyone by having the toys out.