s/o FF v BF and judgment

blainethetrain

hepcats:

hckygrl909:

I have been judged for EBFing, but I really couldn't care less. By the same token, I do judge FFing moms. I understand that some people just can't BF, but in countries where nearly everyone breastfeeds, "lactation failure" is virtually nonexistent. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201108/breastmilk-wipes-out-formula-responses-critical-comments

I don't blame women who FF, it's definitely easier, especially in the beginning when BF can be really horrible. Plus our society tells moms that FF is a choice every mom should have the right to make, and that formula is a perfectly suitable replacement for breast milk. It's not. It's inferior, and every nutritionist, doctor, nurse and any person not in the pocket of or under the sway of formula (drug) companies will tell you that.

That being said, if BFing moms were more supported from the get-go, in the hospital, at work, in public, etc. things would be totally different. If BFing wasn't something that was even considered a "choice" that a woman would make, if formula was only used as a last resort in emergency situations, then we wouldn't have to have these discussions, no one would feel judged, and we'd have a whole country of healthier babies.

 Flame away.

Wow. I got on this post mostly to see what Sunset had said and then I see this. I EPd for 6 weeks. I produced plenty of milk for LO and probably could have continued to. I don't disagree with you that formula is inferior to BM - it is, straight up. Formula can't provide to them your immunities, it's missing all kinds of good stuff. You have every right to your opinion on that.

But there is absolutely nothing wrong with someone using formula instead of BF if that's the choice they make for their family. You have zero right to judge someone else for their choice on that matter - ZERO.  The are not putting their child in harm's way, they are not beating their child, or doing something unsafe or stupid with their child - they are FEEDING their child and, frankly, that's all that should matter to an outsider.

If we go forward with using this as an argument, then people who put soda in bottles and feed their kids McDonalds at every meal should go completely unjudged. They are feeding their kids, right? I guess as far as I'm concerned, breast milk is best, and I want only the best for my kid.

In response to the argument my so and so was formula fed and he turned out fine, IMO it falls into the "When you were little we didn't have carseats and you turned out fine" BS. Just because something doesn't kill you immediately doesn't make it a good choice.

I have every right to judge. We all do. I'm sure that when y'all read my post, you judged me for being judgmental, and that's fine.

 

rainstar752

hckygrl909:

hepcats:

hckygrl909:

I have been judged for EBFing, but I really couldn't care less. By the same token, I do judge FFing moms. I understand that some people just can't BF, but in countries where nearly everyone breastfeeds, "lactation failure" is virtually nonexistent. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201108/breastmilk-wipes-out-formula-responses-critical-comments

I don't blame women who FF, it's definitely easier, especially in the beginning when BF can be really horrible. Plus our society tells moms that FF is a choice every mom should have the right to make, and that formula is a perfectly suitable replacement for breast milk. It's not. It's inferior, and every nutritionist, doctor, nurse and any person not in the pocket of or under the sway of formula (drug) companies will tell you that.

That being said, if BFing moms were more supported from the get-go, in the hospital, at work, in public, etc. things would be totally different. If BFing wasn't something that was even considered a "choice" that a woman would make, if formula was only used as a last resort in emergency situations, then we wouldn't have to have these discussions, no one would feel judged, and we'd have a whole country of healthier babies.

 Flame away.

Wow. I got on this post mostly to see what Sunset had said and then I see this. I EPd for 6 weeks. I produced plenty of milk for LO and probably could have continued to. I don't disagree with you that formula is inferior to BM - it is, straight up. Formula can't provide to them your immunities, it's missing all kinds of good stuff. You have every right to your opinion on that.

But there is absolutely nothing wrong with someone using formula instead of BF if that's the choice they make for their family. You have zero right to judge someone else for their choice on that matter - ZERO.  The are not putting their child in harm's way, they are not beating their child, or doing something unsafe or stupid with their child - they are FEEDING their child and, frankly, that's all that should matter to an outsider.

If we go forward with using this as an argument, then people who put soda in bottles and feed their kids McDonalds at every meal should go completely unjudged. They are feeding their kids, right? I guess as far as I'm concerned, breast milk is best, and I want only the best for my kid.

In response to the argument my so and so was formula fed and he turned out fine, IMO it falls into the "When you were little we didn't have carseats and you turned out fine" BS. Just because something doesn't kill you immediately doesn't make it a good choice.

I have every right to judge. We all do. I'm sure that when y'all read my post, you judged me for being judgmental, and that's fine.

 

Do you think any of us want anything less than the best for our child?  Can my FFFC be that I secretly hope your supply tanks tomorrow so you can learn to have some sympathy for other people's "choices"? (even when they don't necessarily "choose" to FF but do so out of necessity). Okay, that was mean, but really....

Kymbirleigh

I got judged (IRL) for wanting to supplement. It seems like the only people in my corner when I decided to do it was my husband and my parents... MIL went nuts. She kept telling me how BM is best, and if I just keep doing skin to skin frequently it'll boost my supply. She refuses to listen that I typically BF her every two hours and I take all those frikkin' supplements and it's not helped. Drives me nuts that she refuses to shut up and listen that I'm doing all that crap and it's not working. And the lactation nurses give me the side eye about supplementing while complaining about weight gain. Really? Pick one. Don't want me to supplement? Then quit b*thcing that she's not gaining enough weight to meet your approval... Want her to gain weight to your satisfaction? Then quit b*tching that I am supplementing!

Sorry.... MIL started in on my DH last night... Now she's convinced that DD must be tongue-tied and that's why she's having a latch problem. WTF? I never said she had a problem latching or anything.... I said she wasn't gaining weight like the nurses want her to. Ugh. It's no wonder I've been spending time at my parents or in bed just to avoid her. 

I posted earlier this week about supplementing because I needed the reassurance that I was doing the right thing.... For the last two years I've been trying to rebuild my self esteem and self confidence... So when my MIL was on my case about BFing I crumbled and it broke my confidence in myself again. I hate that I let things like that get to me... =(

Rachel5782

hckygrl909:

hepcats:

hckygrl909:

I have been judged for EBFing, but I really couldn't care less. By the same token, I do judge FFing moms. I understand that some people just can't BF, but in countries where nearly everyone breastfeeds, "lactation failure" is virtually nonexistent. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201108/breastmilk-wipes-out-formula-responses-critical-comments

I don't blame women who FF, it's definitely easier, especially in the beginning when BF can be really horrible. Plus our society tells moms that FF is a choice every mom should have the right to make, and that formula is a perfectly suitable replacement for breast milk. It's not. It's inferior, and every nutritionist, doctor, nurse and any person not in the pocket of or under the sway of formula (drug) companies will tell you that.

That being said, if BFing moms were more supported from the get-go, in the hospital, at work, in public, etc. things would be totally different. If BFing wasn't something that was even considered a "choice" that a woman would make, if formula was only used as a last resort in emergency situations, then we wouldn't have to have these discussions, no one would feel judged, and we'd have a whole country of healthier babies.

 Flame away.

Wow. I got on this post mostly to see what Sunset had said and then I see this. I EPd for 6 weeks. I produced plenty of milk for LO and probably could have continued to. I don't disagree with you that formula is inferior to BM - it is, straight up. Formula can't provide to them your immunities, it's missing all kinds of good stuff. You have every right to your opinion on that.

But there is absolutely nothing wrong with someone using formula instead of BF if that's the choice they make for their family. You have zero right to judge someone else for their choice on that matter - ZERO.  The are not putting their child in harm's way, they are not beating their child, or doing something unsafe or stupid with their child - they are FEEDING their child and, frankly, that's all that should matter to an outsider.

If we go forward with using this as an argument, then people who put soda in bottles and feed their kids McDonalds at every meal should go completely unjudged. They are feeding their kids, right? I guess as far as I'm concerned, breast milk is best, and I want only the best for my kid.

In response to the argument my so and so was formula fed and he turned out fine, IMO it falls into the "When you were little we didn't have carseats and you turned out fine" BS. Just because something doesn't kill you immediately doesn't make it a good choice.

I have every right to judge. We all do. I'm sure that when y'all read my post, you judged me for being judgmental, and that's fine.

 

You're comparing formula to soda and mcdonalds???? Really????

sunset+skies

hckygrl909:

hepcats:

hckygrl909:

I have been judged for EBFing, but I really couldn't care less. By the same token, I do judge FFing moms. I understand that some people just can't BF, but in countries where nearly everyone breastfeeds, "lactation failure" is virtually nonexistent. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201108/breastmilk-wipes-out-formula-responses-critical-comments

I don't blame women who FF, it's definitely easier, especially in the beginning when BF can be really horrible. Plus our society tells moms that FF is a choice every mom should have the right to make, and that formula is a perfectly suitable replacement for breast milk. It's not. It's inferior, and every nutritionist, doctor, nurse and any person not in the pocket of or under the sway of formula (drug) companies will tell you that.

That being said, if BFing moms were more supported from the get-go, in the hospital, at work, in public, etc. things would be totally different. If BFing wasn't something that was even considered a "choice" that a woman would make, if formula was only used as a last resort in emergency situations, then we wouldn't have to have these discussions, no one would feel judged, and we'd have a whole country of healthier babies.

 Flame away.

Wow. I got on this post mostly to see what Sunset had said and then I see this. I EPd for 6 weeks. I produced plenty of milk for LO and probably could have continued to. I don't disagree with you that formula is inferior to BM - it is, straight up. Formula can't provide to them your immunities, it's missing all kinds of good stuff. You have every right to your opinion on that.

But there is absolutely nothing wrong with someone using formula instead of BF if that's the choice they make for their family. You have zero right to judge someone else for their choice on that matter - ZERO.  The are not putting their child in harm's way, they are not beating their child, or doing something unsafe or stupid with their child - they are FEEDING their child and, frankly, that's all that should matter to an outsider.

If we go forward with using this as an argument, then people who put soda in bottles and feed their kids McDonalds at every meal should go completely unjudged. They are feeding their kids, right? I guess as far as I'm concerned, breast milk is best, and I want only the best for my kid.

In response to the argument my so and so was formula fed and he turned out fine, IMO it falls into the "When you were little we didn't have carseats and you turned out fine" BS.

I have every right to judge. We all do. I'm sure that when y'all read my post, you judged me for being judgmental, and that's fine.

 

WOW, you're kind of special, aren't you? Feeding your child formula is NOTHING like feeding your kid McDonald's and soda. Fast food and soda were NOT formulated specifically to mimic a healthy food source. This is probably one of the stupidest arguments I've seen against formula feeding.

I love this gem: 

" Just because something doesn't kill you immediately doesn't make it a good choice." 

So... what would have been a good choice? Feeding my child the single ounce I produced in a 24-hour span, and what.... praying that he lived? Getting donated milk from the only milk bank in Canada, three THOUSAND miles away, thus bankrupting myself, and living on the streets? Oh, don't worry about the fact that you don't have a home, baby. You're getting breast milk! 

You have 300 posts since 2008. You're obviously a lurker who only posted just to stir $hit up and spout your judgmental bs. Go back to the rock you crawled out from under. We don't need your crap here.

Rachel5782

and now I want McDonalds... thanks hckygrl!

sunset+skies

Rachel5782:

and now I want McDonalds... thanks hckygrl!

You know, I'm sure you LO is ready for solids, he'd probably appreciate a Big Mac and a coke. You should go get some!

Rachel5782

sunset+skies:

Rachel5782:

and now I want McDonalds... thanks hckygrl!

You know, I'm sure you LO is ready for solids, he'd probably appreciate a Big Mac and a coke. You should go get some!

Great idea!  I'll just use a food processor so LO can eat it.. want me to pick up a happy meal for your LO too??  It's prob cheaper than the crap we're pouring down our kids' throats...and just as healthy!

sunset+skies

Rachel5782:

sunset+skies:

Rachel5782:

and now I want McDonalds... thanks hckygrl!

You know, I'm sure you LO is ready for solids, he'd probably appreciate a Big Mac and a coke. You should go get some!

Great idea!  I'll just use a food processor so LO can eat it.. want me to pick up a happy meal for your LO too??  It's prob cheaper than the crap we're pouring down our kids' throats...and just as healthy!

Oh no, D's totally a Wendy's kid. We put a baconator in his crib at night in case he gets hungry.

maddiemoon43

Telly21182:

I've been judged for saying that I only plan on EP until he's on solids.  People have asked why even bother if I already have an end date in mind.  Well, I bother because I can give my son the nutrients my breast milk provides him, however because he couldn't latch and I have to EP it's very time consuming and difficult to do sometimes so yes, I do plan on a time limit.  That's not to say that I won't stop EPing earlier or later, but for now that's my plan.  At least I'm still doing what I feel is best for our family.  

Yes!  That's why I have some frozen too, so when I reach my goal (or breaking point! ) I can still give DS some. 

I feel like I don't fit into either EBFers or FFers, and both think I am nuts.  FF don't understand why I would go to the work only to give a bottle in the end, and BF don't seem to think I tried hard enough (a 3rd LC saying they have never seen a child raise their tongue so much in 7 years of experience, and my MW threatening he would be hospitalized if he lost another oz apparently don't matter), nor do they seem to think that my child is "at least getting BM;" instead it is all about how I am missing out on the bonding, and the whole "Womanly Art" thing.  I still mourn this without their help.

When there was a recent post about EPers feeling judged though, you guys had a lot of amazing responses, and a lot of, "I could never do that," etc., and that was awesome.  It is still hard to take that and say, "Well, I guess I AM doing something impressive!"  Instead I am still hung up on guilt and failure, and hating EPing, and feeling like I HAVE to pump...when shouldn't I be happy I can make something DS is thriving and healthy from?  I think this is such a personal and sensitive topic that we all feel judged, and sometimes we are our own worse judge.  A friend planned to FF from the start (the only one of 12 friends to have babies this year who doesn't BF), and although I wonder to myself why she wants to add bottles and the expense, I know her child will be healthy and loved.  Why do I then judge myself for providing "only" expressed BM?

ETA - I think a lot of my own guilt and attitude are because I planned to have a natural birth, and I did.  I planned to use cloth diapers (dispite the "we'll sees...") and I do and love it.  I planned to BF, and I am not really...and EPing outsife of TB is a pretty unknown and isolating concept right now. 

PurdueMama14

I was going to respond calmly and rationally to this thread, but after readying hckygrl's responses...well...now I'm just mad. So I'll keep it short and sweet.

I EPed for 6 weeks due to latching issues. No, my DS didn't just have trouble latching from time to time...he never latched. I have flat nipples and he never latched properly ONCE. Never. I was pumping around the clock and the stress was making me crazier and crazier each day, so we went to formula after 6 weeks.

And yes I felt judged when we switched to formula. Which really stings when you are already feeling super upset that things didn't work out the way you wanted them to. 

LaRue86

Im late to the game, but I am judged by some for EP'ing. My mom has said why bother if you arent going to BF....Uhhh...Yes, A does enjoy his occasional boob time, however, it makes him sick. My let down to his super latch is a fire hose and still is. I tried everything to get my letdown to slow, to no avail. I ended up having my gallbladder out 3wk PP and DS was on a bottle for days. I had 1 procedure on Friday, 1 procedure on Saturday, and had to wait 24 hours after the 2nd procedure to nurse. DS's gas issues had disappeared over that weekend. I had 4 incisions and holding his wiggly self against my incisions made me cry, so I started pumping. A week later I started nursing again and the gas issues were back. DH and I talked and decided it was the best for DS to receive a bottle. Thankfully most of my friends EBF and have been very supportive of my EPing. They commend me for taking so much time to EP and give A BM. It is what keeps me going honestly.

I struggle with the fact that pumping takes away time I could spend playing with A. I no longer get a lunch at work as I have to use my lunch time to pump or stay longer. So for the next 8 months I will be eating lunch at my desk while working. I will never go to bed before 10pm, so I can get that last pump in, I will get up 45 minutes earlier to pump before work. I said to DH that FF feeding would be soooo much easier. If it wasnt for the cost of Formula, I would probably switch. Perhaps that will come off as ungrateful of my ability to provide BM to my LO, but FF is a great alternative. We have a ton on our plate and the 2+ hours I spend pumping I could accomplish a lot, but because I am cheap, I will continue to pump.

 

kimbo1216

sunset+skies:

Oh no, D's totally a Wendy's kid. We put a baconator in his crib at night in case he gets hungry.

I seriously just lol'd at this!!!

Thanks again everyone.  I love this board so much!!!  It gives me so many points of view about so many different things.  I feel much more educated and researched about things than moms I know irl because of this board.  And yes, I do mean researched.  I'll read things on hear that will inspire me to go research them.

You are all awesome!  EBF, EP, FF, or somewhere in between, you all rock!

blainethetrain

I guess my point with the fast food comment was that I've seen moms judging other moms about the fast food thing. I was carrying the "no right to judge" thing to an exaggerated conclusion. The thread asked if you've ever judged or been judged. I have. I thought it was clear in my original post that I don't blame moms who CAN'T bf, I blame moms who choose not to. If that makes me a rigid b*tch, so be it. As far as the lurking to stir up trouble thing, I really only post when there's a thread that applies to me or that I have an opinion about.

kate05

hckygrl909:

I thought it was clear in my original post that I don't blame moms who CAN'T bf, I blame moms who choose not to. If that makes me a rigid b*tch, so be it.

Totally not clear and you are back tracking now because you got called out.  You said:

hckygrl909:

...and that formula is a perfectly suitable replacement for breast milk. It's not. It's inferior...If BFing wasn't something that was even considered a "choice" that a woman would make, if formula was only used as a last resort in emergency situations, then we wouldn't have to have these discussions, no one would feel judged, and we'd have a whole country of healthier babies.
I guess as far as I'm concerned, breast milk is best, and I want only the best for my kid.  Just because something doesn't kill you immediately doesn't make it a good choice.

So, according to you formula will kill my child.  This is what makes you so very wrong.  You can't post what you did and then try to claim you don't blame moms who can't BF.  That's it.  I am done with you.

J9melissa

rainstar752:

Sunset:  well, your post did make me laugh! (the unnecessary sob story part).  I'm sure I'm one of the women you're talking about, and I have to say, I am very sorry if it came across that way!  Honestly, I wasn't really thinking about how my words would affect those who have already gone to formula- because in a lot of ways I thought those people would be the most empathetic, having been there themselves (no matter what the reason or when it occurred).  Mostly, I'm just trying to find others going through the same thing *right now*- and it's comforting to know that there are other ladies here who have done all the same stuff to try to continue and still can't make enough, etc, etc.  I think, in my case, I was reassuring myself as much as trying to get reassurance from others that it's okay to stop.

Anyway, just my viewpoint.  I'm sorry if it offended you!

You said exactly what I was going to say...so: Ditto

Sunidaze

Very very late to this.

Before reality hit, I had every intention of breastfeeding for as long as possible.  I never really was judged on any of my decisions as far as how I raised my child (although my grandmother has told me more tha once she didn't breastfeed her children, my grandfather was not supportive of it at all).  Reality set in and eventually, my LO got a 50/50 diet of BM and formula.  I was very hard on myself for initially giving up after the two week mark and yes, I was one of those who felt like a failure - not somuch was because I couldn't breastfeed her exclusively, but more along the lines that I just don't like to fail.  Period.  And I feel like I've failed at so much in my 38 years on this planet.  I sought help form an LC realized that I just could not commit to what needed to be done to maintain/increase my supply, and began to come to terms that yes...it just wasn't going to work the way I would have liked it to and I did what I could.  Pumped when I could (quite busy at work...I'm shocked and disappointed at myself that I'm even bumping right now, on my work computer) and then I made the decision just over a week ago that LO is going to be exclusively formula-fed...went through hell on Saturday, and now we're all good.  I have more time at work for work, I can sleep in a little bit longer and spend a little more time with LO in the morning, less bottles to wash in the evening so more time to spend with her. 

Long story short, I've never really felt judged for any of my decisions with regards to feeding LO nor have I judged others for their decisions (just maybe a little envious of those that are able to keep up with it, have a great supply, etc.).

runnergrl6675

hckygrl909:

hepcats:

hckygrl909:

I have been judged for EBFing, but I really couldn't care less. By the same token, I do judge FFing moms. I understand that some people just can't BF, but in countries where nearly everyone breastfeeds, "lactation failure" is virtually nonexistent. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201108/breastmilk-wipes-out-formula-responses-critical-comments

I don't blame women who FF, it's definitely easier, especially in the beginning when BF can be really horrible. Plus our society tells moms that FF is a choice every mom should have the right to make, and that formula is a perfectly suitable replacement for breast milk. It's not. It's inferior, and every nutritionist, doctor, nurse and any person not in the pocket of or under the sway of formula (drug) companies will tell you that.

That being said, if BFing moms were more supported from the get-go, in the hospital, at work, in public, etc. things would be totally different. If BFing wasn't something that was even considered a "choice" that a woman would make, if formula was only used as a last resort in emergency situations, then we wouldn't have to have these discussions, no one would feel judged, and we'd have a whole country of healthier babies.

 Flame away.

Wow. I got on this post mostly to see what Sunset had said and then I see this. I EPd for 6 weeks. I produced plenty of milk for LO and probably could have continued to. I don't disagree with you that formula is inferior to BM - it is, straight up. Formula can't provide to them your immunities, it's missing all kinds of good stuff. You have every right to your opinion on that.

But there is absolutely nothing wrong with someone using formula instead of BF if that's the choice they make for their family. You have zero right to judge someone else for their choice on that matter - ZERO.  The are not putting their child in harm's way, they are not beating their child, or doing something unsafe or stupid with their child - they are FEEDING their child and, frankly, that's all that should matter to an outsider.

If we go forward with using this as an argument, then people who put soda in bottles and feed their kids McDonalds at every meal should go completely unjudged. They are feeding their kids, right? I guess as far as I'm concerned, breast milk is best, and I want only the best for my kid.

In response to the argument my so and so was formula fed and he turned out fine, IMO it falls into the "When you were little we didn't have carseats and you turned out fine" BS. Just because something doesn't kill you immediately doesn't make it a good choice.

I have every right to judge. We all do. I'm sure that when y'all read my post, you judged me for being judgmental, and that's fine.

 

Wow, just wow.  You have every right to judge but I'll judge you right back.  You have no idea what people have been through and why they don't breast feed.  Shame on you!

magnoliablossom00

Late to this arguement.....

To answer the OP, yes, I do feel judged. I EP and like other EPers have already said, BFers judge you for "giving up" and FFers sometimes mock you for working so hard when you are still giving a bottle (not on the bump, but multiple ppl IRL). DD had latching issues that weren't really her fault, I have large flat nipples that made it hard for her to connect. I had to use shields but she would continue to cry and cry, and the milk would end up all over both of us. I met with several LCs and finally called it quits on the latching bc it was easier. As any EPer would tell you, its actually a lot harder to pump than straight nursing, but it was easier on my DD, so I did it.

I don't give a sh** who cares if I EP, including my own Mother and MIL who think I am crazy and that I am not "bonding with my baby." What until they realize that I'm quitting at 6 months of age! I think 6 months is a long time and it was my original goal- so everyone can suck it! 

The only time I have judged any mom is my friend who had a preemie baby. He was born at 3 lbs, spent time in the NICU, and was on ventilators. He latched well and could nurse, but she quit b/c she "didn't like it." I feel like she should have continued b/c her supply was fine, he latched well, she was a SAHM, and he was sooo sick. So, yes, I judged b/c it seems silly to quit doing something that you know is good for your sick child just b/c you don't like it. However, I know that she was unhappy, so maybe it was for the best.

As for this blog, yes, sometimes BFers make me feel bad when they always say how you love "bonding with the baby" and how the baby "smiles up" when you BF. For the mommies like me out there, it makes us feel poorly b/c we are killing ourselves to give our children the same nutrition without those benefits. 

FFers, no judgment here. I will soon become one of you!!! Its a shame that we all can't support each other or have more empathy to everyone's situations.

bookkitten

mkd00:

Its a shame that we all can't support each other or have more empathy to everyone's situations.

 

Word.

monkeysmama62

hckygrl909:

I guess my point with the fast food comment was that I've seen moms judging other moms about the fast food thing. I was carrying the "no right to judge" thing to an exaggerated conclusion. The thread asked if you've ever judged or been judged. I have. I thought it was clear in my original post that I don't blame moms who CAN'T bf, I blame moms who choose not to. If that makes me a rigid b*tch, so be it. As far as the lurking to stir up trouble thing, I really only post when there's a thread that applies to me or that I have an opinion about.

So because I chose to stop BF that means I don't want whats best for my LO? I had a great supply and DD latch perfectly and immediately but I couldn't handle it. I hardly got any sleep and because I was BF DD would only let me hold her. Every time my DH would hold her she would cry. What was best for our family was for me to be able to sleep and be there for my child and husband. I do regret stopping but I know it was the best choice for us. You have no right to judge any mom for any choice they make about their family when it won't effect you. It just makes you look like an even bigger b!itch. 

magnoliablossom00

Oh, and I would like to add that I don't blame BFers for talking about it. I am just slightly jealous that it didn't work out for me, too!