How to handle IF and work

lmj8284

Hi Ladies, Happy Friday!

I met with a new Dr. this morning and talked about starting injectibles.  After speaking with hubby about it I think we're going to start this process this winter.  I'm wondering how you all handle the mutiple ultrasound and blood work appointments with your job?  I realize I don't "have" to tell my boss what's going on but I feel kinda funny about taking off so much work? 

It's not that the time off will be a problem, I guess I just think it's going to look strange when I need time off all the time.  How many of you told your bosses what's going on?  Any advice for me?

ELF4321

My RE's office does the monitoring appts from 7 am to 8:30 am, so it's possible for people to get them done and still get to work on time.  Not sure what the best way to deal with it otherwise would be,

keelmic

It's definitely not easy. IF is like balancing another job with the one you have!

I am a teacher so I go in for bloodwork and u/s at 7am before school. On IUI days or days when we have to meet with the RE, I take a half day but just code it as a "sick day". I still haven't told my male principal yet that we are TTC. Fortunately, sometimes my visits fall on the weekends which is much more convenient than weekdays.

I don't know what kind of job you have, but if you need to tell your boss, I might consider telling him that you will need to take some time off for necessary medical procedures at your dr. office. I would only elaborate if needed.  

ccam

I didn't have to tell anyone since I've accumulated plenty of sick time.  But I honestly have one of the nices bosses ever and I knew he was probably wondering why I was taking so much time off.  I ended up sitting down with him and explaing what was going on. 

I was nervous and emotional, but he ended up telling me how him and his wife struggled with IF for years.  I was so relieved that I told him - he said just to give him a heads up and take as much time as I need as this is most important right now.  I'm happy I ended up telling him, especially since he knows exactly what it involves.  I still get looks and "is everything ok" from other co-workers, but I feel better now that my boss knows I'm not slacking or anything. 

It's a completely personal decision and you need to do whats best for you.  Good luck!

dawnmarie1279

 I work in NYC, so I made sure that when I found a dr that they would be close enough for me to have enough time to get to work without being too late. I get monitored also in the am between 7 and 8 am. I take the train right to downtown Manhattan where I work & am usually hear by 9. I have a great relationship with my boss so I was able to tell him everything and he is very understanding and supportive. Best of Luck with everything!!

KdgTeacher

I have to have a small procedure done on the 2nd day back to school--thankfully I won't have students yet.  I simply e-mailed my (male) principal and said I needed to have something done and told him I wanted to make sure that missing this day would be the "best" day to miss versus missing a day with kids so soon in the year.

As far as other appts, I'm hoping I can get them done at 7AM  before school starts (maybe a little before 7 since school starts ay 7:40). 

This is one of the parts I dread the most.  I'm not in a profession that I can leave for an hour or two (or half a day) and it is "no big deal."  If I leave it creates a ton of extra work in creating plans for a sub and then having the deal with the aftermath of me being gone when I come back.

I'm kind of preparing myself  for "the talk" with my principal about why I may be gone so often.  I think he'll be more than OK with it and very supportive.   

HotChocolate79

My RE's office starts monitoring appts at 6:45 in the morning.  I am usually out by 7:10 if not earlier, so it gives me plenty of time to get to work at my normal hour and not raise any suspicions. 

Consultation appointments, testing, and procedures were trickier and eventually I ended up telling my boss.  I had plenty of sick time, and neither she nor I are concerned about me getting work done (I am salaried and have a lot of flexibility in how/when to do things) but we have a great relationship and I didn't want her to think I was looking for another job or slacking off.  The bonus is that she's been awesome about letting me work at home on days I have to get something done, so that I can be comfy in my sweatpants on the couch rather than worry about makeup, real clothes, and looking presentable.

ADub09

My RE does monitoring by appointments, so for ultrasound or bloodwork I call in a half day sub.  For IUIs I took a full day medical appointment day.  I was totally up front with my male prinicpal and that has been great, his sister is going through IF so he has been extremely understanding and often stopped by my room to chat after I had been away for an appointment.

hootie123

For b/w and u/s - I go in before work.  Luckily I have a job with a 'flexible work schedule' so as long as I work my 8 hours once I arrive I don't need any time off that day.  Only 1 of my IUIs was on a weekday - and for that I just took half a day in the morning and went in on the afternoon. 

I have not told my boss anything at this point - he may be wondering since I have taken random sick leave for some appts that are in the late morning/afternoon.  My issue with telling him what is going on is that I don't want to have to tell him the outcome of the treatment (if I'm pregnant or not) - and even if he doesn't ask - I don't even want him wondering.    It's going to be harder for me with starting IVF since I will likely need one or two random sick days several days apart.

lmj8284

Thanks for all the great advice!  I'll wait until we get closer to starting this process to decide what to do or say to my boss.  Sounds like most places do early morning appts so that would be awesome if I didn't have to take time off.  But it's also great to hear that many of you talked with your boss and explained the situation and they were so supportive.

Thanks again!  Hope ya'll have a greay weekend:)

btaylor19

I told my boss what is going on.  We have a policy where any time you are more than half hour late without giving 24 hours notice it goes against your 6 absenses for the year.  Since I never know when I'm going in until the afternoon before I had to tell her so she wouldn't keep marking it against me.  I also filed for FMLA coverage.

limpetfan

My RE's office does monitoring between 6:45-8am, so I didn't usually need time off of work for my IUI cycles.  Once we decided to do IVF, I told my boss what was going on because I knew IVF=time off of work a few times in a month.  My boss is a man, so I was terrified to tell him about any of this... but it turned out, he and his wife had trouble conceiving their child and he was completely familiar with what I was telling him!  So my advice is to be honest about what's going on and how often you may miss/be late for work, because you never know who is going to be more than understanding, and maybe even make things easier on you

 

Jill070707

I told my boss I had a "non life-threatening medical condition" that required lots of monitoring.  I just made up the time and it was fine.  I eventually told work when I moved to IVF.  Best of luck!