DS refuses to poop on the potty — The Bump
Potty Training

DS refuses to poop on the potty

He's a champ at peeing on the potty, but he absolutely refuses to poop on it. He held it for 4 days-until he made himself sick and I finally put a diaper on him and he UNLOADED. I can tell when he's about to go and rush him to the potty but he just puckers up. Now he's taken to pooping in his undies or pull-ups at daycare. Help! I just don't know what to do to get him to poo on the potty. I've gone in front of him (TMI I know), tried bribery, I just don't know what else to do. Suggestions? TIA!
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Re: DS refuses to poop on the potty

  • Just wanted to say that we're in the same boat.  DS hasn't had a pee accident in weeks, but usually poops in his underwear.  Sometimes I catch him before he goes and get him on the potty, and occasionally he tells me he needs to, but usually he hides somewhere, crouches down, and then when I see him he tells me it's too late, he already did it.  This morning he peed on the potty and then immediately proceeded to run into another room and poop in his underwear.  WHY WHY WHY???  What is so scary about pooping on the toilet??????

    I wish I could help.  Maybe someone else has some words of wisdom... 

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  • We are in the same boat!  I wish he would poop in the potty, but I figure he will when he is ready.  He will either go in his diaper/pullup at naptime, or he will go in his underwear!  If we catch him starting to go, we try rushing him to the potty, and he will not let it go.  I don't want him to get constipated, so I've just been going with it for now.  

    I would imagine eventually they will do it!  So, no advice from me, but just some thoughts from someone in the same boat! 

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  • I wish i was the poster with helpful information but we are SO in the same boat.

    Except we are on day 3 of NOT pooping which is way more stressful than just going in his undies. He is now in the cycle of "it hurts" to poop, which is making him hold it, which in turn is making it harder.

    I'm at my wits END. I've given up on directing him to use the potty for poop and just want him to feel comfortable pooping again.

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  • I was in the same boat for just over a week- peeing great and waiting for nap time pull up to poop.  I got him to do it over the weekend when I caught him running to the other room and I picked him up and brought him into bathroom.  As he cried and tried to get away I promised him popcorn (which I consider a choking hazard and has been the ONE thing he has wanted "when he was a big boy")  I told him "If you poop on the potty you will be a big boy and big boys can have (popcorn)"  Fill in the blank for something that might work for your DS.  Whether it is a food item, game, outing- something that makes them "big".  DS pooped and we waved good bye and flushed and he got to have popcorn.  He hasn't done it since- gone only at night in diaper- but I think he would if I caught him and promised him more popcorn. 

    If something like that doesn't work- I still wouldn't worry- every boy-mom friend I have says it takes way longer to poop train with boys.  In time, they will do it.  For those that are having constipation problems- when they seem in pain put a diaper or pull up on them- I think torturing them with underwear and accidents is probably making it even more scary for them, imo.  But I know I am a little more laid back than some moms when it comes to training.

  • My SO and I have been dealing with this for several months now. My DSS who is 4 refused to poo on the potty. His BM fully supported him pooing in his diaper as well as wearing a diaper at night. I was the one who got him started on potty training by getting him his favorite character undies and saying "it's not nice to pee on so and so." He was on a big that is not nice kick at the time. It worked like a charm a year and half ago. BM was trying to "force" him to wear a diaper event when he was good to go in undies. He finally stood up to her and was basically like listen I am done. No more diapers. LOL. I understood having him wear a diaper at night to deal with him not wetting the bed. Somehow, we only have had one accident (knock on wood) and that was when he fell asleep at like 5 or 6 pm and slept till 8 am. So, then I finally was done with the whole needing a diaper to go poo thing when he turned four in Feb. I told my SO we are done. The diapers disappeared from our house. My theory is that he was having difficulty pooping (TMI) and needed the leverage. We cut out soda and increased water and juice. We increased his fruit intake. Now, poo on potty is no biggie. He also has a special potty seat for the big potty. We also celebrate with high fives and a special dance. We do not reward with candy. We realize there will be accidents. We enjoy the small things!  Sorry a little long. Just sharing what has worked for us. 
  • My twins went through this. The one it just took time, time for her to finally get the connection. So I stopped the training with her until she would try to poop on the potty consistantly. So I put her back in pullups for a while because I was tired of cleaning poop out of panties every single day. I just had to wait it out until she was really ready to train and do it herself. It took until she was 2 years and 9 months and she started asking to go on the potty again and she started pooping on it as well. And I knew were good at that point because she would dump the little potty into the big potty herself and was very proud clapping for herself. So for her she just wasn't ready when she was younger.

    For the other girl she would ask for a pull up so she could poop. She was a 1 or 2 time a day pooper and when we started training in panties would hold it in for days and then just finally cry and go in her panties, she would not go on the potty and was afraid to poop on the potty. So for her I went with it and gave her the pull up when she needed to poop. I needed her to relax and go and the only way she would do this is with a pull up. So for me, I would rather her ask me for a pull up (that meant she recognized the feeling before needing to go) and let her go in a pull up for a while, then let her constipate herself so bad we end up in the ER because she is impacted. Once they hit 2 years and 9 months and her twin started going on the poop on the potty (it was Easter time) and I let her twin pick out a special piece of candy from the Easter Candy given to me by my SIL for every time she pooped on the potty. This was huge for them to pick out the candy from a bag, it was very motivating. The twin that needed the pull up to poop was interested, but still too scared to poop on the potty. About 2 weeks after Easter, she came running to me to ask for a pull up and I was washing dishes at the time. I told her I would be there in a minute because I had wet hands. I took a reallllllly long time stopping the dishes and drying my hands and since I took so long she just decided to sit on the potty instead and pooped on the potty for the first time. I made the biggest deal out of it and she got to pick out her candy. She has gone poop on the potty every day since, several times a day, some days. For her she just needed that finally nudge one day to get her to do it.

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