Help!

Amzy

My friend has a 6 year old son and 1.5 year old daughter with another baby on the way. She is having issues with her son and his behaviours. He is constantly talking back to them, yells at them and harrasses the little sister. He always says no when they ask him to do anything and she is at her wits end. I want to help her but I don't know how. Anyone who has any pointers on how to fix his behaviours, it would be greatly appreciated! I want to help her fix it before the new baby comes early next month. Thanks Ladies!

eturp

Has she specifically asked you for help with her son? If not I would be really weary about giving her any parenting advice. Parents can get really defensive when people (even good friends) try to give them unsolicited advice on how to raise their kids. I would say if she has asked then the best advice I could give is that she needs to make it clear that his behavior(s) will not be tolerated anymore (because obviously if he continues to act this way they have been in the past). However she chooses to correct his behavior (timeouts, loss of toy/privilege, etc.) the key is that she needs to be consistent and follow through with consequences because that is the only way he will know that she means business. The other question I would ask is this behavior fairly new or a recurring problem? If it hasn't been going on long he may be feeling a little neglected from all the attention being paid to the new baby on the way. If this is the case than his behavior might improve some if his parents set aside some special time to spend with just him. GL to your friend!

kare81bear

eturp:

Has she specifically asked you for help with her son? If not I would be really weary about giving her any parenting advice. Parents can get really defensive when people (even good friends) try to give them unsolicited advice on how to raise their kids. I would say if she has asked then the best advice I could give is that she needs to make it clear that his behavior(s) will not be tolerated anymore (because obviously if he continues to act this way they have been in the past). However she chooses to correct his behavior (timeouts, loss of toy/privilege, etc.) the key is that she needs to be consistent and follow through with consequences because that is the only way he will know that she means business. The other question I would ask is this behavior fairly new or a recurring problem? If it hasn't been going on long he may be feeling a little neglected from all the attention being paid to the new baby on the way. If this is the case than his behavior might improve some if his parents set aside some special time to spend with just him. GL to your friend!

All of this!  Also we have a 6 yr old and I know he was excited for his sister to get here but as it got closer his behavior shifted as more people asked about her arrival.  We just made sure to do special 1-on-1 dinner or movie days and family time more often prior to arrival.  Once DD got here he was ok with her and proud to show her off until it was always gifts and questions about baby from our friends and again behavior shifted.  We use timeout and loss of privileges (toys and activities) as needed, and continue to schedule 1-on-1 time.  We also do family activities like movie night and family dinner out that he helps choose what he and his sister will like to do.  GL to your friend!

 

carinamarie77

Give her this book: https://www.amazon.com/Playful-Parenting-Lawrence-J-Cohen/dp/0345442865

 Unless she didn't ask for your help...in which case, I don't know if you can help by butting in.