I want to file for full custody but I have a few questions

UnderAtree

I don't want any child support at all, besides since Ryan has been born the only thing STBX has bought him was a box of wipes. He never once helped out and his idea of taking care of him is put a pacifier in his mouth, if he still cries and spits pacifier out place pacifier back in mouth and place hand firmly over his mouth till mom gets out of the shower or back from the store to tend to him. And yes that has happened on numerous occasions.

The thing is if I file for full custody and tell the lawyer that he will have the right to visit Ryan when ever he wants, as long as my mom or me is there with him, will the lawyer make Ryan has nightly visits with STBX?

 I really don't want Ryan over there. He lives with his two brothers and mom and their house is filthy. His older brother is a drug dealer, his younger brother lives in the living room, his mom lives there half the year. They never clean, they leave food, even meat, out for a couple of days and everyone eats it. I am seriously amazed they are never sick. I have even seen them kill roaches with forks or even their bare hands then go and reach for Ryan. 

 I am honestly terrified to have Ryan over there at all. I don't even know how I survived living there for awhile. But if I have full custody with no child support will the court still make Ryan go there?

 

(sorry this turned out long and into a vent) 

PrettyInPearls23

Why don't you want child support? Not asking for CS isn't going to make you look any "nicer", therefore making a judge "let" you have the visitation you want. I guess I'm just confused. So what if your STBX isn't helping out now. That doesn't mean he should escape the responsibility, if only financial, of a child.

You can file for full custody if you want. But be prepared to have an outline of what kind of parenting time schedule you want to include along with it. And what lawyer are you talking about? Yours? His?

Have you talked to STBX about what kind of parenting plan the two of you are going to have? It sounds like you want your X to have an active role in your child's life, but under your terms and conditions. Start documenting everything -- living conditions (photos w/ dates if you can get them), the interactions with your STBX, his parenting skills, etc.

But, getting back to the original point of your post. No, not asking for child support won't "get" you the visitation that you want. Sorry.

DarthNBJenni

Child support and custody are two separate issues. File for child support now. Let your ex file for custody.

thatjessie

Until there is something in writing stating that he gets to see him from ex. 9-12 on sundays you don't have to let him see him or take him. You do however need to file for CS, he does need to contribute you can't let him off free of any responsibility (like other pps mentioned).

ballmom

As far as custody goes, if you feel the house is not fit for LO to be at, ask the courts to issue a GAL.

DaringMiss

Is your ex on the birth certificate?

UnderAtree

DaringMiss:

Is your ex on the birth certificate?

Unfortunately yes.

 

And to everyone else. I honestly have no clue what I am doing or where to even start. I know nobody to ask for advice on what to do so I am not sure how all this works.