DH drinks at night, I'm worried I'll go into labor and he won't be able to drive

kewltif

agent79@me.com:

He doesn't drink that much EVERY night, but it happens, and I just KNOW with my luck, he will drink that much on the night I go into labor.

He's in sales and always has social work meetings where drinks are served, too, which doesn't help. So say he is out for a work meeting until 6, and he had 2 glasses of wine. Then he gets home and wants a couple more glasses of wine.

 

It's annoying, but it's not like he sits down and pounds hard alcohol or something. It's just that the cumulative effect of 4-5 drinks from 5pm until 10 or 11 makes me worry.

 

I'll talk to him tomorrow. I like the suggestion that if he's buzzed, he's not invited into the delivery room, and HE has to call his folks to explain why THEY need to drive me to the hospital.

 

Thanks for the advice ladies.  

To me, this is a different scenario from your original post. I think if he drinks five drinks every single night that's indicative of an alcoholic.  This post sounds more like he doesn't drink every night, but when he does, he may have up to 5 drinks.

I don't know, maybe I just hang in a drinking/social crowd, but to have 5 drinks on a night out doesn't seem EXTREME to me. I've done that myself when I went out partying pre-pregnancy and I'm definitely not an alcoholic. 

I was originally reading this post last night as my husband was asleep after drinking with his buddy watching basketball earlier.  It suddenly occurred to me that I could also go into labor any day.  When he woke up I brought up the issue of not wanting him to drink during my last few weeks of pregnancy and explained my reasons why and he was like, "Sure. That makes sense." I was pleasantly surprised by his response. I sort of worried that he might think I was overreacting.

Anyway, thanks for the post! I guess I cleared something up for myself as well as a result of reading this.

heysupnatalie

RaiKai:

heysupnatalie:

My FI usually has a few drinks every night too but I am not really worried about him not being able to drive to the hospital because theres tons of people around us who would be more than willing to drive me there. I know that if I tell him I am uncomfortable with the amount he is drinking then I know he would take me seriously. If we go anywhere and he has more than 2 drinks I drive home. Obviously if I am in labor I will not be driving myself but I am sure once we get closer to my EDD then he will slow it down. I know the baby could come anytime now but I can't really worry too much about it or it will just make me worry more.

Oh, yeah, I am sure he will slow it down.  You know, because that is how alcoholism works.

 

How do you know he will take you seriously if you tell him you are uncomfortable with the amount he is drinking? Have you ever told him that?

I find it pretty fvcked up that you are okay with him drinking a "few drinks every night" since someone else can drive you to give birth to yours and HIS own child.

 

I guess I should of explained a little deeper then. By a few drinks I mean like a beer or two and yes I have told him about it. We actually talked about it last night after I read this post. I am not uncomfortable with his drinking because I know that he doesn't HAVE to have a drink every night, because he really doesn't do it EVERY night, just like 3-4 nights a week. We both work in the restaurant industry and we get out late and sometimes its just nice to sit there and have a drink after work. Obviously I haven't been able to do that for some time but still. Call me crazy but I am not going to sit there and tell him I forbid him to have a drink at night/.

nmeirose

Sorry this is long but you remind me of me 6 years ago.  Edited and removed because when I read your story I got emotional and put too much potentially identifable information out there, but PM me if you want to talk. 

The gist of it: your DH has a problem, a big one, and it will not change easily.  Since you are so close to delviery, circle the wagons, get the closest people to you together, tell them your worries and concerns, and let them take care of you and your baby.  Focus on you and your baby right now, since your husband can not be there for you the way you need him to be. 

nmeirose

PS I also work in sales and marketing, and know what you mean about there always being drinks around.  And honestly, if you don't drink there are usually comments made.  Sales is a great job for an active alcoholic (heavy sarcasm)!

 But if your husband listens to you, cares about you, and decides not to drink for a while, there are plenty of work arounds.  Get a gingerale on the rocks from the bar, or seltzer with lime.  He can look like he is being 'one of the guys' without getting drunk, if he does not want to have to have those conversations.  (for those who have never been in sales, the razzing can be pretty rough if you choose not to drink). 

 Just some practical tips if his response to your concerns is "I have to drink for my job".