Give me suggestions on a proper response...

MCC1010

A good friend was studying for his doctoral in general clinical psychology. He has completed all his classes (four years), the practicum (all three years) and was scheduled to start his internship in the fall. He has failed the written exam for the fourth time and has been expelled from the university. He had appealed previously and was granted one last attempt at passing the written exam. There is no appeal process after this. He cannot transfer to any other school to attempt to complete his degree. The only things he had left were the written exam, his oral dissertation and his one year internship to graduate. He is devastated.

I need help with something to say as he has called and sent me text messages. All I can think of saying is - How the hell do you spend four freaking years living, breathing psychology and are not able to pass this one fvcking exam??? What the hell have you been doing all these years? Picking your a$s?

See that is NOT a good response...help me people...please.

 

ABColeslaw

ooo dude that sucks.  I don't even know!  I can't imagine!  Some people just really suck at taking tests. 

MCC1010

ABColeslaw:

ooo dude that sucks.  I don't even know!  I can't imagine!  Some people just really suck at taking tests. 

See if he sucked at test taking he would have never gotten this far.....ugh. This is why I suck at being sympathetic!!

ABColeslaw

MCC1010:

ABColeslaw:

ooo dude that sucks.  I don't even know!  I can't imagine!  Some people just really suck at taking tests. 

See if he sucked at test taking he would have never gotten this far.....ugh. This is why I suck at being sympathetic!!

Maybe because he failed it the first time, he had a lot of anxiety and then when he failed it again and again....I don't know.  Its the only thing I can think of!  Its a lot of work to put in, to just not study say four times!  

LuvMyBostons

I have no idea!  That poor guy too.  I had a friend who failed then nursing exam 3 times so she just gave up, but I don't keep in contact with her anyway.  Maybe just tell him you support him no matter what happens and that what's meant to be will be (cliched crap).   

MarMat

Do you have to tell something about it??

I have no idea what can he do without a degree, but, I guess he had plan B?

teamsweet

It kind sounds like the dept wanted him gone and "failing him" on a written exam is an easy excuse.  My dept used to be like that and had become increasingly transparent.  When I went through qualifiers, it used to be if you did well in your research, how you did on the exam didn't matter.  That and what qualifies as "passing" is still completely vague.  It turns out that like everything else, it's political.  If you've failed to make as impression on anyone and you don't have a faculty member batting for you, you're gone.

One guy in my dept was asked to leave after 5 years! He had passed his qualifiers and coursework and then he was kicked out for not making enough progress on his research.  It sucks for him and your friend.

Tell him you're sorry and suggest he think about his plan b.  Did he also earn a MA/MS that he could use?  Or maybe start working and try to get a MA in counseling at the same time. 

MCC1010

teamsweet:

It kind sounds like the dept wanted him gone and "failing him" on a written exam is an easy excuse.  My dept used to be like that and had become increasingly transparent.  When I went through qualifiers, it used to be if you did well in your research, how you did on the exam didn't matter.  That and what qualifies as "passing" is still completely vague.  It turns out that like everything else, it's political.  If you've failed to make as impression on anyone and you don't have a faculty member batting for you, you're gone.

One guy in my dept was asked to leave after 5 years! He had passed his qualifiers and coursework and then he was kicked out for not making enough progress on his research.  It sucks for him and your friend.

Tell him you're sorry and suggest he think about his plan b.  Did he also earn a MA/MS that he could use?  Or maybe start working and try to get a MA in counseling at the same time. 

The requirement has always been you HAVE to pass this exam. It has always been the rule and there are five versions of the test given once a semester to the students. They only allow you three tries but because he has always been a good student they allowed him to test the fourth time. I actually tried to talk him into waiting a few months before taking the exam again. He wouldn't listen.

He completed his masters before entering the doctoral program. I don't think he has completed his hours for licensing but thanks for reminding me of that! Hopefully, he can start those hours and pass the state exam.

MCC1010

MarMat:

Do you have to tell something about it??

I have no idea what can he do without a degree, but, I guess he had plan B?

No plan B because he never expected to fail it again.

I think he is looking for reassurance or support but I just want to shake him!

onislandtime

Ooh that's a tough one MCC. I suk at giving false sympathies too. Maybe you can just change your ph # and act like you never got the call or texts?