Hi :) Introduction and not sure about being here...super scared.

janabelle3

Hi.. I am new here and wanted to introduce myself. Nice to meet you all

I just had beautiful twin girls a week ago, and as I knew it would be hard work with two babies, I didn't expect such an emotional roller coaster, and for myself to feel so scared and filled with anxiety. My husband is home from work right now and has been for a week and a half. He is going back to work in a week and a half, but my fear of him going back to work is freaking me out really bad. Knowing he and I share the responsibility during the day is a lifesaver. I'll have family helping for another week when he goes back though which is nice.

He doesn't have the same anxiety I have whatsoever.  I keep crying on and off, and keep getting so scared of all this responsibility. I don't know if it's just the "baby blues" I keep reading about, or if it's already postpartum depression. I keep reading that my anxiety will pass, but currently I've never been so scared in my frigging life!

It would be helpful to talk to other women going through what I am..... I feel alone in this right now.

Thanks so much and nice meeting you!

Beanin

Before DH went back to work I experienced the same thing. I was so afraid of having to do it all myself, and I only had one LO. DH ended up taking an extra couple of days off but I knew I had to do it myself eventually, he couldn't stay home anymore than that.

During those extra couple of days DH had me pretend like he wasn't there (at least in a helpful way, I still interacted with him, he just didn't help with LO until 5 PM) as trial runs to try to get used to doing it myself and to only ask for help if I really could not do it on my own. You could give that a try.

It's great you have help initially after he goes back. I think this is just normal anxiety most new moms go through and not PPD. It's a big job. It makes sense you're concerned/worried. You will get through it. GL!

jaime5121

I can only imagine having to take care of two on my own!  I was scared with one.  Believe it or not, I'm freaking out now, and my son is almost 18 months old.  My DH will be gone for two week straight.  I work full time and will have no help for two whole weeks.  So, right now, I'm kind of in the same boat, only with one child.  We can freak out together! 

I think what you are experiencing is totally normal.  Take a deep breath - repeat.  You can do this.  Keep telling yourself that!  GL

janabelle3

Beanin:

Before DH went back to work I experienced the same thing. I was so afraid of having to do it all myself, and I only had one LO. DH ended up taking an extra couple of days off but I knew I had to do it myself eventually, he couldn't stay home anymore than that.

During those extra couple of days DH had me pretend like he wasn't there (at least in a helpful way, I still interacted with him, he just didn't help with LO until 5 PM) as trial runs to try to get used to doing it myself and to only ask for help if I really could not do it on my own. You could give that a try.

It's great you have help initially after he goes back. I think this is just normal anxiety most new moms go through and not PPD. It's a big job. It makes sense you're concerned/worried. You will get through it. GL!

 

Thanks so much for the words.. appreciate it. That is a great idea.. maybe the day before he goes back I will tell him to pretend like he's not here and I will try everything on my own. I'm sure I'll get through it-at this point though I can't stop crying because I am so scared, and I love these babies to death, they are the most precious things, I admit I miss my old independent life ...it's such a huge change. But in time I know things will get better and the anxiety.

janabelle3

jaime5121:

I can only imagine having to take care of two on my own!  I was scared with one.  Believe it or not, I'm freaking out now, and my son is almost 18 months old.  My DH will be gone for two week straight.  I work full time and will have no help for two whole weeks.  So, right now, I'm kind of in the same boat, only with one child.  We can freak out together! 

I think what you are experiencing is totally normal.  Take a deep breath - repeat.  You can do this.  Keep telling yourself that!  GL

Okay let's freak out together!! haha.. It's nice to talk to other women going through these crazy crazy emotions.  That is what I keep trying to do right now.. telling myself to calm down to ease the anxiety. I really have to just slow down my "baby stage fright" I call it. I can imagine having your hubby gone two weeks is going to be very trying.. wow. That is a long time. I keep counting down the days til my hubby goes back and I am left with two babies.. SCARY.

janabelle3

McRib:

I think what you are experiencing is totally normal. I felt that way and I only had one. I'm glad you have help for the second week. Line up more help if you feel like you need it and you can. Try to take some time for you if at all possible. A walk or a bath were my sanity in those first weeks. Crying a little is normal. Depression or anxiety that keeps you from sleeping or eating is not. Good luck and hang in there. I felt like myself again after one month (thanks to prozac and just time healing all wounds).

 

Thanks for the words...yeah I keep crying a couple times a day. I just can't help it. I just start bawling on my husbands shoulder. And he is wonderful.. I don't know how he keeps it so calm and collected when I am such a hormonal scared mess. He is going back to work and I feel left with this huge responsibility during the day. Phew...I know I'll get through it but envisioning how hard it will be is the scariest thing EVER. Especially with two babies. and also if I had just one too.

janabelle3

McRib:

I think what you are experiencing is totally normal. I felt that way and I only had one. I'm glad you have help for the second week. Line up more help if you feel like you need it and you can. Try to take some time for you if at all possible. A walk or a bath were my sanity in those first weeks. Crying a little is normal. Depression or anxiety that keeps you from sleeping or eating is not. Good luck and hang in there. I felt like myself again after one month (thanks to prozac and just time healing all wounds).

 

Thanks for the words...yeah I keep crying a couple times a day. I just can't help it. I just start bawling on my husbands shoulder. And he is wonderful.. I don't know how he keeps it so calm and collected when I am such a hormonal scared mess. He is going back to work and I feel left with this huge responsibility during the day. Phew...I know I'll get through it but envisioning how hard it will be is the scariest thing EVER. Especially with two babies. and also if I had just one too.

LALASEPT05

Congratulations on your twins! I have to say that after our twins were born I felt the same way. I had a lot of anxiety - that is the only way to describe it. I didn't have the typical depression type feeling but more the feeling that I was terrified to be alone with them and that I would never be able to take care of them by myself and I would get so much anxiety every time I knew I was going to be alone with them. I cried a lot in the beginning. I would go in the shower and just cry and I just wanted things to go back to the way they were before the babies. Not that I didn't love them - I just really felt that I couldn't do it and I wasn't a good Mom. The crying got better after 3 or 4 weeks, but the anxiety lingered for a while. Looking back I should have approached a doctor about medication. A little after they were 6 months old we got a very good schedule going and they began sleeping better at night. That is when I really felt better - once I felt that I could do it on my own. Finally at that point I began feeling normal and like myself. Good luck to you - one thing I would do is defiitely try to find a Mom of Multiples group in your area. It will be so great to talk to people who know what you're going through and who have been there and will give you tips and tricks to get through and who can give you the confidence that time will pass and it will get easier and that you will make it through!