Am I over reacting

jjflipt

My hubby and I started TTC last month.  I didn't get prego.  He drinks quite a bit.  I asked him to please please not drink a lot this week so when we TTC everyting is all good and healthy.  Last night he drank and tonight he drank.  I am beside myself... just beside myself.  I'm so hurt and sad.  I don't know if I am over reacting or not.  HELP??

justadogmommy

Guys just are not educated on all the fertility stuff unless you tell them. They just think it is so easy to get pregnant. He should cut down but so should my hubbie. Maybe try for awhile longer before you tell him again.

boymamaco

I would let him know how it made you feel. He should respect your feelings on it. Its one week a month - and its really important to you. So, no I don't think you are overreacting. You are completely entitled to your feelings. But I agree with PP, that many guys just dont think. Spell it out for him in a non-accusatory way and he'll get the picture.

AlmostLoCo

I had similar issues with my DH when we were starting to TTC.  I felt like he wasn't taking it seriously and he would go out and drink a lot or stay up late watching a baseball game instead of coming to bed when he knew it was O time.  It actually led to a really good discussion about how important it was to me and how there are only a few days a month when I can get pregnant, which he didn't really understand. He is now 100% on board so I agree with Lucy - talk to him about it.  I found explaining the more technical aspects of ovulation helped.  Sadly, now that he's seen me cry a few times over it he'd do anything to help us TTC.

CityPixie

Hi.  Could it be a more serious problem?  Understand that I know nothing of your DH but I do know that alcoholism is serious and sometimes families don't want to face it.  I apologize if I'm out of line.  There are resources and support available; I hope you'll seek them out.

-Pix

MDBeachbride

If your DH is getting hammerred each night, I agree - this may be another problem BUT if he's simply having a few beers...eh, I don't know.  I'm not sure what your Dx is, if any, or what your TTC journey has been thus far, but I do think it warrants you discussing your feelings with him. 

 

georgia3

I agree with the PPs- a beer with dinner is one thing, drinking till drunk when you have to get up and go to work in the morning is another story.  And it doesn't really apply to just the week when you are fertile- his drinking affects the sperm he is making for the next 3 months.  It's indicative of a healthy or not so healthy lifestyle.

jjflipt

Citie Pixie ~ You were not out of line.  It was certainly something that was on my mind and we talked about last night. 

 Georgia3 - I didn't know that "drinking affects the sperm he is making for the next 3 months".  Can you give me more info on this? 

 We did talk yesterday and he understands why I was upset.  I think all is good.  We aer TTC right now.  We started last night, then Friday, Sunday.....

georgia3

Sperm production is cyclical.  It takes, on average, about 42-76 days from the time of production to ejaculation in normal men.  So, what you consume today impacts the sperm that will be swimming 3 months from now.