Dog vs Baby (long)

JulietL129

tch81:

A lot of great points here folks.  I hate the idea of putting him in the backyard, personally I don't see the point of anyone having a dog if he can't live in the house with the family.  The backyard was simply a way of maybe compromising.  Prior to meeting my H I had a rott mix & a shepard mix, both of whom I took to obedience classes & they were properly trained and excellent dogs!!!  The problem w/ this one is 1) he has never had any kind of training and even though I try, if H isn't doing the same it simply doesn't work.  2) I strongly believe in crate training, H & his family think it's inhumane.  So we simply don't see eye to eye on the responsibilties of pet ownership.  I understand the importance of socializing dogs & training, but if H & I aren't on the same page, it's a lost cause & the dog is the one that suffers.  We have a friend who owns a dog kennel & lives on a farm w/ her 3 Great Danes, another big dog, some horses & pigs.  Our dog loves her & she's the one who takes care of him when we're gone.  I've suggested asking her if she'll take him.  I have no doubt she'll be able to train & take care of him.  H is opposed to that idea, but he's losing ground in this fight.

Quite frankly the thought of being a first time mom in a town where I have no family or friends for support & trying to train an aggressive dog that almost weighs more than me is just too much.  After this one, I seriously doubt I'll ever get another dog w/ my H.

Thanks so much for responding. I'm so happy that you are acknowledging the good information that you have been given in this post and I sincerely hope that you do the right thing.

If for some reason your friend is unable to take your dog and you need to find a rescue- PLEASE feel free to PM me... I network with rescues all over the place and I will be more than happy to help any way I possibly can.

If you need further resources to show your DH that rehoming is the best option, let me know... I can get you lots of info showing how damaging chaining can be and the risk you run brining a baby into a home with a dog that is not suitable for it in the condition that it's in.  

Again, thank you for being receptive!   

USArmyWifeToBe

pixy_stix:

Rehome your husband, he sounds like a real winner.  Can't take care of his dog, can't take care of his house, can't respect his wife.  Awesome all the way around.

This isn't the dog's fault, it's your husbands.

That being said, gather up the money and make a SUBSTANTIAL donation to a rescue so that they can work on cleaning up your husband's mess.  The dog will be better off without you idiots.

Sorry but AGREED!! How did you live with that dog even not pregnant? I would have stood my ground & got that dog to training ASAP. Or at least have a trainer come to you right away. You say your worried about your baby, which is VERY real & true but I would have been scared for myself as well. That dog is dangerous for a baby, dangerous to you & H & dangerous to your poor neighbors. People that can't be responsible don't deserve dogs esp. strong willed dogs like Rotties. Call a professional ASAP!!! As for sending the dog away, I dunno how I feel about that, its not that dogs fault, dogs will be dominant if given the leash, your husband gave the dog the leash a long time ago & so did you since you never stood your ground. Get help & give that dog a chance esp. that little child coming into your lives.

jaredandmartha

As a rottie owner I think you may need to surrender the rottie. It is going to take tons of time n money for your rottie to start behaving like a sociable dog. I have a boxer, a jack russell n a rottie. They all live inside, but there are times that we make them go outside and play!  I don't think u should make the dog outside only, and I wouldn't suggest doing what I am doing since the dog isn't friendly. Our rottie loves being indoors so thats where she stays while the other rascals have a ball playing with us outside. It is so hard to have a baby and a strong breed dog. Either get help n just know that its going to cost a lot of money or surrender the dog to a proffesional no kill rescue site before the rottie bites one of you or the baby n then most peoples solution would be to put the rottie to sleep. Not fair for the pup at all! =(

alliecarrie41

you cannot put a dog in the backyard---that is not a solution, and it's abusive.  you need professional training, and since a dog costs money, you need to save this for him.  it should have been your DH's responsibility a long time ago, but now you are married, now this is your dog.  Together, you need training and exercise, discipline, etc. and if you cannot give this, you have to think about finding a new home for this dog with owners who can care for him.  i hope you can figure this out fast!

klregelm

Before you consider surrendering your dog put some money/effort into dog training.  Find someone who is Cesar Milan certified/trained/whatever.  he is amazing and his training style is EXTREMELY effective if the owners are willing to put in the effort. I really love what he does.  I also watch the "It's me or the Dog" lady- she's good but she doesn't really train the dog owners to be leaders.

Don't give up on the dog- and show your DH what real training can do for his dog!

2 great reasons to consider for keeping your Rottie:  #1 with a watchdog (at least in our area) your home owners insurance goes DOWN (which could offset the cost of training!).  #2 having a pet in the home is actually really great for your health and stress levels- probably not so much right now but maybe after he is trained! 

tch81

Ok, so as I was sitting here dreading having this conversation w/ H again when he comes home tonight, my MIL called and asked if we could talk.  I said sure what's up  and she said that she & FIL have been discussing this & they really don't feel comfortable w/ me bringing a baby home w/ the dog here.  I NEVER mentioned to her that this has been worrying me.  She said that she talked to our friend who I mentioned ealier, she (our friend) owns the kennel where we board our dog/ she's also a dog trainer & groomer and she thinks the dog should be removed as well.  She didn't volunteer to take the dog but she said that she would help find a home & help do the interviews for prospective owners for us if we decide to give him up.  She said that she would be willing to work with him but 7 years worth of bad ownership & aggressive behaviour can't be undone in 6 months and it would be a huge liability bringing baby home.  So MIL & FIL said that they are willing to help me make H understand this.  Problem is, H has had the dog for 7 yrs, I've had him for 1 1/2 yrs.  Sometimes I think he loves the dog more than me!  It's going to be a fight 1) making H realize that even though he loves on the dog 24/7, he failed the dog by not doing his research prior to getting a rotty & by not training him allowing him to get this bad and 2) making H realize that his precious baby (the dog) is a threat and dangerous in his current state.

This hurts me because I love dogs, even this one.  But once I came into the picture there was little I could do to set boudaries & rectify the dogs behavior without H's support. You simply can't have one owner that calls the shots & the other allows the dog to do whatever.  I'm really nervous about this but we'll see how it goes.