- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Pregnant after a Loss
By request...circumcision gone wrong story
So my son was "under-cric'ed" at birth...meaning they didn't take enough off and it kept reattaching, and the Pedi would have to pull it back and it would bleed and it was awful. We eventually were referred to a Urologist at Children's when he was 7 months old so we could fix it once and for all.
He had to be re-circ'ed, which at 8 months old is actual surgery. We were hesitant to do it, but felt like it wasn't fair to leave the poor kid half circumcised and the Urologist did say there could be issues if we left it alone (discomfort during sex being one, and we weren't willing to do that to DS). They had to put our little guy out for about an hour and it broke my Mommy heart. He recovered quick, but it was still pretty awful.
What the Urologist told us was that it's incredibly common for little boys to be circ'ed incorrectly. Luckily being under-circ'ed is easier to correct...some boys are over circ'ed and there are MAJOR issues and discomfort for them. He said about 50% of his surgeries are correcting circumcisions.
So I'm pretty not into circ'ing honestly...I was torn about DS, but left it up to DH. I'm convinced that there's no way DS #2 will be circ'ed, but DH is having a hard time thinking that he'll be the only boy in the family not circ'ed. We obviously have some talking to do. If I do for some reason give in we will have it done by a Urologist and not my OB. I know that for sure.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
This discussion has been closed.
Re: By request...circumcision gone wrong story
Your poor DS. I'm so sorry to hear that. I was pretty pro-circ if we have a boy, but I may have to look into things.
Wouldn't it make more sense to go to an actual urologist to have this procedure performed in the first place? I am just questioning why it is commonplace for OB's to do this. I guess it is more convenient, but on the other hand, they should be competent surgeons. But I also guess there is a difference between surgery on neonates and pregnant women.
DH's circumcision wasn't complete either, total TMI, but there's this weird skin bridge on his peen. It doesn't hurt him or anything but it was done wrong.
I don't think we'll be circ'ing our son, aside from the fact that we're doing a homebirth so I don't even know who'd do it if we wanted it.
Labor Buddy to Blowfish11
My DH would kill me if he knew I was telling people this...but he was actually over circ'ed...it's happened a few times during " raucous events" that he's actually gotten tears where the head meets the shaft.
Not pleasant.
Kelz, thank you for sharing, sorry you and DS went through that, and glad things turned out ok.
DH would never go for not circ-ing our LO should he be a boy, so I guess I need to research the most competent circ performers in LA...
That does it, my son is going to have a turtle head-is that what an uncirc'd peen is called? I mean between the two familes a 100% failure rate? hm.
side note, i have never seen an uncirc'd peen, ever.
Labor Buddy to Blowfish11
Shell - scroll down.
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/36204853.aspxI know there are different tools and methods of circumcising. I wish I knew of a study that discussed pros and cons, safety etc for them. I would ask other women in the waiting room, ask friends who go to the same OB if one of the MDs did a circ on their son and how it went.
BWahahahaha, omg, that's priceless.
Labor Buddy to Blowfish11
An uncirc'd peen looks like an elephant trunk (when it is not in happy mode). Happy, they look like any other peen... well that's my experience anyway because the skin just pulls back.
Bwahaha, "happy mode." If I giggle next time I see DH in "happy mode," it's your fault.
LOL!!! Totally all my fault if that happens.
I just posted on the CP thread that if you're planning to circ your son, you might want to look into having a mohel do it. They use different instruments, they are much quicker, and perform a LOT more circs than a regular pedi might. I have never met a Jewish man (or parents of a Jewish baby boy) with a circ gone awry. We have two mohels in Denver and one is a pediatrician. A lot of parents have him do their sons' circs, even though they are not Jewish, based on the level of experience he has and his technique.
Not an argument on whether you should or shouldn't circ - rather, a PSA for those planning to do so.
awe your poor baby.
we were going to get DS circ'd but had to wait to find out if DS had DH's blood clotting disorder, well i'm so glad we waited b/c i did alot of research and discovered there's really no reason at all to circ. him.
Sorry you had to go through that and poor DS too! We had a milder version happen to us- DS's kept adhering and so his pedi had to "unstick" it several times- it was so painful for him and I felt awful! Luckily for us, it worked itself out.
I refused to sign the paperwork for the circ b/c I just couldn't do that to my baby. DH was pretty set on it, so he signed.
Kelzin- I'm sorry that you and your son had to go through that. I just wanted to tell you about another forum board at Mothering.com it's called "the case against circumcision" and on that board there are a lot of moms who have older sons who are circumcised and younger sons who aren't... that's REALLY common... so if you needed some reassurance about what to do in the future- and that it is OK for you to change your mind about what to do in the future- you will find a lot of support over there and it might go a long way toward easing your husband's concerns as well.
My sons are not circumcised and my husband is- so although I have not faced the "brothers different" thing- I can tell you that the "not matching dad" thing is a total non-issue.
It's so sad that the urologist would tell you how common this is- after the fact... but they don't tell this to parents in advance. The sad truth is- more circumcised boys are circumcised TWICE... than intact boys/men ever need to be circumcised in the first place- so the whole "we want to do it when he's an infant to avoid problems and avoid the risk of having to do it later when he'll remember" is a totally false reasoning that just does not add up! Why don't they explain this to parents!!??
Lastly- to people who are thinking that you can avoid this sort of thing by being more careful about who you choose to do the circumcision- that is also a misguided way of thinking that might be coming from confusion about how the anatomy actually works- and the dynamics of the growing and shrinking of the penis (by design)
People that are used to circumcised penises as the standard- have trouble imagining what a foreskin really is... they think, OK- you have a circumcised penis... and then there is like a ring of extra skin that covers over the head... so they just have to slice off that extra part to get to the circumcised penis that's under it.
False. The penis skin system is a continuous tube of skin... there are some variations in the nerves and skin type along that tube of skin- but it's all one long piece that covers the "stick" of the penis. starting at the pubis- and ending right behind the head with the glans protruding. This skin tube is longer than the penis. It's so long that it actually doubles over at the end- that part that is doubled over- that is called the foreskin... but the foreskin is not really a specific place or tissue that could be marked with a dotted line.... the foreskin is simply a certain amount of slack in the skin when the penis is at it's smallest! I challenge you to find the foreskin on an intact man with an erection- where does it go? That slack is there so the penis can get bigger... get bigger with puberty- and get bigger with erections... and even when the penis gets bigger- the skin still can cover the whole length and even move a little bit. The fact that penis skin is designed to slide over the shaft is part of the mechanics of sexual intercourse- it's a buffer between the walls of the vagina and the thrusting of the erection, reducing friction as well as the dependence on lubrication to make intercourse comfortable.
So- how can you choose a Doctor who knows exactly how much of that slack in the skin is the right amount to cut out of that continuous sleeve of penis skin? Do you know a doctor who can look at a baby penis and say, "It looks really tiny now- but when this boy hits puberty- his penis is going to get a lot bigger- so I am only going to remove 1/2 of the infant slack- because he's going to need the rest of that when he's older!" I've never heard of a Dr. who can predict adult penis sizes by looking at infants. And what about erections? Some guys have big looking penises that just get hard and don't change size much... other guys have penises that get much longer when they get hard... how do you know who is who? So what if you have a chubby little baby whose penis schrunches into his pubic fat... and he grows up into a skinny gangly man... when he's a baby- his penis pulls into the bunched up skin and he looks "1/2 circumcised"... and when he's an adult- his erections are painfully tight and his pubic hair is pulled up onto his shaft of his penis because there isn't enough skin to cover his erection (I had a boyfriend who had that) How can a doctor know? I don't think they can- all they can do is guess and hope...you can't pick a doctor who KNOWS the right amount...all they can do is guess- and if they get it wrong... who is going to know? 18 years after the fact he's going to hunt down his mom's OB and say- hey dude... I think something's not right? I don't think my x-boyfriend's mom ever saw his penis erect after her son had pubic hair... so she probably had no clue how bad the Dr. messed him up.
The only way to know how much skin is needed to comfortably cover an adult man's erection- is to wait till he is an adult and to measure it.
I also feel that I should mention that I also had a Jewish boyfriend who had penis skin so tight it was squeaky when wet- like a clean plate, like a rubber dildo. His circumcision scar was wide and obviously had to grow that way to make up for the fact that his penis was longer than the skin he was left with. I have no faith that mohels have any better skill at guessing than any other circumciser.