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Blended Families
sweetie0228
member
Manhunt-long
sweetie0228
member
Oh it's on like donkey kong!
I'll back up a little bit b/c I've been here a long time but my intro and back story were when we were Stepparenting on the Nest.
I left my abusive exh and BF of my 2 children in Nov 2002. Since then he has been wage attached for CS but changes his jobs so often to not have much if anything taken. Over the years he has amassed an arrears balance of over $10, 000. It usually hovers there b/c when ever he gets hauled into court for contempt his mommy pays a large sum so he doesn't go to jail. He has also been on probation for contempt of court for failure to pay child support for the last five years. It's the only way we see any type of payment b/c it's a oneway ticket to the county prision.
My DD cut off contact with BF 2.5 years ago under the advice of her Therapist. BF looked right at her and said well if you don't wan to be my daughter I dont' want to be your father. And never spoke to her or refered to her again. He stopped having contact w/ my DS who is younger in July. We have not had any visitation or contact with him since then. The last time I physically saw him was September for a Contempt of Court hearing to put him on probation again for failure to pay CS. He never talked to me or asked me about the children.
He missed Jan and Feb payments. I found out in Feb he was granted short term disability and therefore didn't have to pay until Feb 11. It's now March and still no payments. I call my enforcement officer again and inquire about is he still on disability is he planning on paying?
Call back from enforcement officer right now. BF is MIA. He is not at the last known adress, he's not answering the phone the cell is going straight to voicemail. His Girlfriend only directs the Enforcement Officer to BF's Cell #. Only Voicemails at his mother's house. The "doctor" has no phone listing and she is starting to believe that there may not be a real doctor.
She also looked into the GF's past. The GF doesn't have custody of her 2 children her parents do. She moved in w/ BF and his parents house years ago b/c she was living w/ an uncle. She was not allowed to live w/ her children. She only had daytime supervised visits. ***Warning Bells*** The Enforcement Officer now suspects Drug use for both of them.
This is the same enforcement officer I have had the whole time. I have been telling her this stuff Suspected drug use, that he wont' pay, he lies ALL THE TIME, His mother is the only person who believes his lies 100% everytime. I have been telling her this since day one!
NOW she believes me. Now b/c he hasn't consistantly paid in 8 years and racked up a $10K debt and has used the same poor excuses over and over and I'm the money hungery B1tch!
He's on the run and a Bench Warrant is being issued. Either the boy is going to jail FINALLY or his mommy will be paying a large sum of child support cash!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Manhunt-long
We have similar BF's. Thankfully mine never had any contact with DD. I'm so sorry your DD had to deal with such a bad dad. Hopefully this means you'll be getting some CS. Maybe getting thrown in jail is exactly what he needs though.
What will this do? I don't know of any states that have a law that force a parent to stay involved with their child.
I think it's great that he is out of their lives since he is so messed up. I hope you get the support you are owed
I know exactly how you feel. My ex NEVER paid a penny in CS, he never showed an interest in the kids and only saw them a few times. I left him while pregnant with DS. He also kept changing jobs and moving. When I finally found him, I pretended like I wanted to see him, so he invitited us over to his house. He went to take a shower, so I looked in his wallet. There was a traffic ticket with the court date! Woohoo-paydirt or so I thought. I also wrote down his car model and license number. I couldn't wait to get home and call the courts.
How nice of them to send him a bill for 14K. I couldn't believe they didn't go to his traffic court date and arrest him there. Well, you can probably guess he upped and moved and changed jobs to a cash paying limo job. He never went to jail for not paying CS. He owes 60K in arrears, and that will never happen. He was only ordered to pay 15 bucks a week in back pay, and the kids are grown up now. It is disgusting how the system sometimes works.
On a brighter note for you, it sounds like he is definitely not the type of person you want around your kids, and now he won't be. I would take this time of him being on the lam and request to the courts that any and all future visitation be removed based on his current actions. You don't want him somehow getting all caught up and start demanding visitation. Protect yourself and the kids now while you can. If you never get a dime from him, you will still be able to make it. Yes, he SHOULD pay, but by now you are used to him not paying, so just do the best you can with making the best life possible for you and the kids. My heart goes out to you and your situation, I truly know how you feel.
What a fookin looser. The new gf sounds like a real peach. THANK GOD they are not in contact with your kids. Imagine having to send your kids to stay with a woman who lost custody of her own kids - jeeze that gives me the creeps.
I would love to be there when they finally arrest his sorry azz.
I think if they strip his rights he doesnt have to pay-she should check with her state on this.
But yeah-what a waste of oxygen!
It sounds as if he has his rights or if they are taken away it won't change anything. He hasn't had contact with DD for several years, and hasn't had contact widh DS for almost a yr now. I'm pretty sure those bridges are burned. Plus, if his rights are stripped, it's doubtful she will be able to get any CS. If she can go without it (and it sounds like she has been doing without) and doesn't care she could file a motion to initiate this, but at this point, I'd be seeing red and want him to pay. As bitchy as that sounds... I'd still do what I could to make him see that he can't just run away from his problems.
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"Karma1969: If baking someone a birthday pie/cake is romantic, I must be a slut."
Personally, I really don't care if he never pays. I would forgive the debt and happily close the CS case if he gave up his rights completely so my SO can adopt the children.
Which is something the four of us all want. Since we are getting married in July, and with all this new stuff...We might be able to have the children Adopted by Christmas if things go well.
Things I have found out in the last hour or so. I have found that the GF is on a Roller Derby team and they are in the next county over. I have also found out that his Grandmother passed away in December. I'm conflicted over this b/c she was a very nice lady and I want to send a card to his parents but then he'll know I'm on to him. I may sit on that info for a little while.
I also dont' know if I should tell the children their Great grandmother passed. DD met her twice and DS met once b/c how far away she lived. She was a very nice lady and was nice to me. Unfortuately, her grandson was a douche.