what's the common courtesy? (

aiMommy

I'm always wondering what the common courtesy is when your child grabs other kids' stuff. Are the parents (if present) expected to stop the kid and return whatever has been grabbed? Or it's better to let the kids to handle their own business?

Have this question as a parent whose DD has never grabbed anyone's anything, but has been grabbed many many times herself. I certainly appreciate it if the other kid's parents interfere, but don't know whether I have the right to expect so. 

Don't know how to make it clicky. So here are the options: Do you immediately return the stuff your kid grabbed from another kid (if you are present and see it)?

A. Never. What's the big deal. It's between kids and should  stay within kids.

B. Very seldom. Only when I feel someone might be in danger.

C. Sometimes. If we don't know the other family, I'm more likely to return the stuff right away; if we are more familiar to each other, I relax more.

D. Always. Kids should learn to respect others at very young age.

E. Every single time (that I see it). It's the rule and I expect the other parent to do the same. 

 

Temp86398625009737

if she takes it directly from the child, and the child is playing with it I make her return it, saying "name was playing with that, you may play with it when they are finished."

femmegem

I intervene and tell DS to give the toy back every time.

JOEBunny

Depends.  DD is small for her age, so other kids can grab stuff from her pretty easily.  I kind of thin you D is choice is condesending.  I think there are times when it is not worth it to make a big deal about it.  I also think kids tend work it out.  If it is a random kid, I am more likely to say something.  If it is a friend and they regularly take from one another, I am inclined to let them work it out.  Obviously, in cases where there is a large age or size difference, I would intervene.  It had seldom been a problem for us. 

DevonPow

It depends. Usually I directly intervene, ask DS to give it back and to say he is sorry. However, if he takes something from one of his BFFs (who he plays with all the time) I like them to work it out on their own. Things happen and a parent is not always there to see it (especially next year when he starts pre-school) so he does need to start learning how to handle it on his own, whether he is the "taker" or the "takee".

He never takes anything from a stranger, like a kid at the park or a payspace, always kids he is comfortable with in some capacity.