I don't know anyone yet, so what about the shower?

halldl@mac.com

I am new to the area we live in and due to the nature of our jobs, we move round a lot.  All of my close friends are in a ton of different states/countries and I do not know anyone here yet.  Does anyone have any ideas regarding a baby shower and what we should do?  I thought of maybe hosting it myself and having more of a couples party versus a shower?  Also, my sister suggested a virtual shower using skype or a similar video chat with all of my friends but that seems so impersonal to me.  Does anyone have any creative ideas?  This is our first baby so I really wanted to have a shower. 

Thank you!

 Sarrah 

EastCoastBride

You don't throw your own shower.  Also, a shower isn't a right.

Don't get me wrong- I get your desire for a shower.  However, if no one offers to throw one, then yo udon't get one.  And quite honestly, if you don't know anyone well enough to throw you a shower, who would you even invite to this shower?

I personally think virtual showers are tacky.  A part of showers are the socializing, seeing the mom to be, food, and drink.  A virtual shower really makes it purely about the gifts.  And really- the gift opening is borning enough as it is - I would have NO desire to sit at my computer and watch someone open gifts.

RoxyLynn

Ditto East Coast Bride.

cswatch

I don't like the virtual shower idea.  I think maybe see if one of your friends from where you are originally from plans on throwing one and maybe you travel there for it?

hopefulmom

Have a welcome baby party after the baby is born (and don't call it a shower).  You can then host it yourself and invite who you want.

Aly07

I am a military wife, so I am used to my friends and family being half way across the country. You need to talk to one of your friends, one the you are close to and don't mind being "tacky" in front of hahaha, and ask her to throw you a UPS Shower. I have done it for several friends. What it is: All of your friends get together and mail you gifts (one per day), so for like 10 days (or how ever many long distance friend/family you have)  one friend will mail you a gift. It almost always gets messed up due to the timing of the mail, and one day you will get 2 gifts but you are only allowed to open one gift per day. Each day you take a funny/fun (be creative) picture of you opening that gift. When you mail your thank you notes, you include the funny picture that was taken of you opening that person's gift along with a list of all of the things you got. I have gotten some really funny pictures from some of my friends. It is ALOT of fun!!

Alot of the time the hostess of a UPS shower will mail each "guest" a small favor as a thank you for participating. Just like having favors at a normal shower. 

Good luck, I hope this helps!!

 

daniellejeanne35

hopefulmom:

Have a welcome baby party after the baby is born (and don't call it a shower).  You can then host it yourself and invite who you want.

This is what I was thinking, too.

ToesnthesandBride07

Aly07:

I am a military wife, so I am used to my friends and family being half way across the country. You need to talk to one of your friends, one the you are close to and don't mind being "tacky" in front of hahaha, and ask her to throw you a UPS Shower. I have done it for several friends. What it is: All of your friends get together and mail you gifts (one per day), so for like 10 days (or how ever many long distance friend/family you have)  one friend will mail you a gift. It almost always gets messed up due to the timing of the mail, and one day you will get 2 gifts but you are only allowed to open one gift per day. Each day you take a funny/fun (be creative) picture of you opening that gift. When you mail your thank you notes, you include the funny picture that was taken of you opening that person's gift along with a list of all of the things you got. I have gotten some really funny pictures from some of my friends. It is ALOT of fun!!

Alot of the time the hostess of a UPS shower will mail each "guest" a small favor as a thank you for participating. Just like having favors at a normal shower. 

Good luck, I hope this helps!!

 

This is a very creative way to host a shower. I have never heard this before. Thanks for sharing!

For the OP, I would not host my own baby shower. I would have a meet the baby party though. Good luck!!

barnwife

EastCoastBride:

You don't throw your own shower.  Also, a shower isn't a right.

Don't get me wrong- I get your desire for a shower.  However, if no one offers to throw one, then yo udon't get one.  And quite honestly, if you don't know anyone well enough to throw you a shower, who would you even invite to this shower?

I personally think virtual showers are tacky.  A part of showers are the socializing, seeing the mom to be, food, and drink.  A virtual shower really makes it purely about the gifts.  And really- the gift opening is borning enough as it is - I would have NO desire to sit at my computer and watch someone open gifts.

Smart lady.

Throwing your own shower is tacky. The purpose of a shower is to "shower" the mom-to-be with gifts. So hosting your own says "I'm greedy! GIVE ME GIFTS!" Not a message I would want to send.

I also wonder who you'd be inviting since you don't know anyone.

 

lakesbride

To the OP - I completely sympathize with your situation. There you are in a new place going through this huge experience without any of your close friends around you. And one of the most fun parts of the experience for many new mothers-to-be (the shower) may pass you by because of this situation. You may not have a 'right' to a shower but I think you have a right to feel disappointed that you may miss out on one. I imagine it's the emotional loss of having your 'girls' gather round you at this special time, rather than a loss of gifts as some have suggested.

The whole shower issue is new to me - I'm British and it's not really a common thing over there. I don't know anyone who has had one. I emigrated to the US this year and don't really know anyone very well in my new community either. All my close friends are in the UK. I feel a little 'left-out' when I read about people looking forward to their showers and discussing their gift registries. However if I was still in the UK I wouldn't have either a shower or gift registry because no one I know does either of those things. I only feel left-out over here!

I imagine that your close friends like mine will probably 'shower' you with love, attention and gifts too once the baby is born, where ever they are. Or maybe your sister could organize the UPS idea above. Or perhaps she could co-ordinate a small shower with a few close friends who would be prepared to travel to see you.

 

scubaspot

EastCoastBride:

You don't throw your own shower.  Also, a shower isn't a right.

Don't get me wrong- I get your desire for a shower.  However, if no one offers to throw one, then yo udon't get one.  And quite honestly, if you don't know anyone well enough to throw you a shower, who would you even invite to this shower?

I personally think virtual showers are tacky.  A part of showers are the socializing, seeing the mom to be, food, and drink.  A virtual shower really makes it purely about the gifts.  And really- the gift opening is borning enough as it is - I would have NO desire to sit at my computer and watch someone open gifts.

 

 

Lance&Becca

daniellejeanne35:

hopefulmom:

Have a welcome baby party after the baby is born (and don't call it a shower).  You can then host it yourself and invite who you want.

This is what I was thinking, too.

Me too. Is this what would be called a "sip-and-see"? It sounded like a great idea to me.

WinWed

Interesting question and a growing issue as we all move around so much these days. I love the idea of a welcome baby party. You may be surprised and some new friends my host something for you anyway.

UrbanLe1

Okay, you guys are being unbelievably rude.

In this case, a virtual or UPS shower might be perfect, or a "sip and see" once the baby is born so all your friends who live far away might be able to come.  Or, maybe someone at work would do a small work shower?

Here this girl is, living in a new place, without a support structure already in place, and just wanting a way to celebrate her new baby.  No, throwing your own shower isn't traditional.  But sometimes, it's a good way to bring new friends into your life.

Seriously people, be nice. 

LittleApple

UrbanLe0:

.  No, throwing your own shower isn't traditional.  But sometimes, it's a good way to bring new friends into your life.

Seriously people, be nice. 

 I'm sorry but if someone I barely knew was throwing their own shower, it would be a turn off.