I have def. reached my IF low.

harley12

So after today's events..I was feeling discouraged. DH and I went out to dinner and I even had a glass of wine. I have just been having such a hard time this round of IVF. I have totally been thinking I was pregnant, but then have been testing negative on digitals the past two days. So on the way home we bought an FRER and the result came up a big NO. I just don't understand this anymore. I was bawling in the bathroom and DH was crying too. If the past 3 rounds of IVF, one FET, 3 rounds of injectibles, 3 rounds of Clomid haven't worked( and 3 chem preg's)..what will? I just feel like we are at the end. I am still totally unexplained. I just wish someone would say it's time to move on..or time for donor eggs...or time to give up hope..but nothing..Noone has any answers. Every year is more heartbreaking than the last...I just feel like I have been pretty strong..I have gone to baby showers, and spoiled my nieces and nephews,,and always tried to be postive,,but I am just running out of hope and trying to be postive. Anyway..thanks for listening..noone else would understand.

CandT

Hang in there!! {{{{hugs}}}}}

Temp893722312503334

oh, honey, I am so sorry that you have to go through this!  I wish I had some words of wisdom...

(((hugs)))

lnle

(((hugs)))

MrsP71506

I am so sorry hon (((hugs)))

In an earlier post did you mention that you had 2 faint lines on a HPT.  So is there a chance that you could still get a BFP?  Maybe test first thing tomorrow morning.   I know that this is so hard, and it sounds like you have gone through way too much.  Take care of yourself. 

so1966

I'm just sending you some BIG (((HUGS))).   Sounds like you've been a great friend and auntie throughout your tough journey. Pls know that you are very special and very strong.   You have every right to vent and every right to be heartbroken and we are always here to listen.

I don't want to give you any unsolicited advice, but what I would have done differently myself is go to CCRM. From what I understand they are the best. It wasn't an option for me, as I found out about the clinic so late in the game and at my older age. Plus....I'm also self-pay. That was my regret.

Take care of yourself.

 

harley12

Yes, I have had faint lines..but I just think if anything another chemical pregnancy. Thanks everyone..I just think I have run out of hope.

efhoping2010

I just wanted to say I am sorry you are feeling so low.  It is like hitting a runner's wall during a marathon, there is just that one point that seems too much.

 

Big hugs and there is still hope, take care. 

harley12

So 1966.....thanks for the advice! CCRM is definitely in the back of my mind..we are lucky though that we live in MA and have IF insurance for 6 rounds of IVF. Given that we have done 3..we will do another 3 here in MA. The only silver lining was that I made an appt for a 2nd opinion with a clinic that has a higher success rate last week. We have our appt in 2 weeks. That is really the only thing giving me hope right now.

smilee

Sweetie... I am so, so sorry

Hugs to you.

I hate that you have had to go through all of this.  

Babsie7

It sounds like you've been incredibly strong. I'm sorry it's been so difficult {{hugs}}

harley12

Thank you everyone

Kiki11

(((enormous hugs))) I could have written this post back in June after IVF#3 was a monumental disaster.  I know the deep dark place that you are trapped in.  I am so very sorry.  If you ever need to talk, I am here- you know how to get in touch with me.  (((hugs hugs hugs)))

Ke11y

I can definitely empathize with you.  We've done 3 fresh IVFs, one FET, and a couple of IUIs.  Since my betas are so low and this pregnancy may not make it, I'm preparing for everything to end and to be finished with IF treatments.  We said that this was our last cycle, no matter what.  After more than 4 years, we decided to move on, just to keep our sanity.  It's actually a relief to know that we can move on to adoption and get on with our lives.  It's up to you and your DH to make a decision on where to go next.  Good luck and I hope you both can decide on a next step that brings you peace.

psychmusetls

:::::::big big big hugs::::::::::

Triathletegirl

I wish I could reach through the screen and give you a huge hug.  I'm so sorry you're feeling this way.

kimberic

(((hugs)))

cheekyali

I know there is not much to say to comfort you, but we are all here for you. Sending you a big hug

JM1977

I'm so sorry about what you're going through.  I can only imagine how much pain you are in.  I will hold out some hope for you since I know we can't always find it ourselves.

wiscgirl95

I am so sorry. ::hugs:: 

Tryingtogetpregnant

I am so terribly sorry. I hate that you are going through this. Have you exhausted every single test out there? I was totally unexplained until we did the integrin 3 biopsy. It turned our IF lives around. Plus, we used a clinic that would genetically test (CGH) our embryos to make sure we were transferring viable ones. These are the 2 reasons I account for our BFP. I am just so sorry again. Please let me know if you have any questions or want to explore any of these options.

Plus, I'm holding out hope that somehow your sticks are wrong!

 

Mrs.Kiltlifter

I wish I had something incredible to say that would take the pain way.  You are so deserving of that BFP.  ((((HUGS))))

BigHairQueen

I am so very sorry

JackieMac824

(((((((((HUGS))))))))))

harley12

TTGP..thanks so much for the advice. I have done most tests, but not the Integrin 3 biopsy. I will ask my new RE about that when we have our consult. Thank you for the thoughts. CCRM is always an option down the road..but is something we would have to save for. Thanks again and I hope you are doing great!

MrsCmx

Like several pp's I have been where you are. This is by far the hardest thing I've dealt with in life (and the most expensive!) and I can only hope that someday it will result in my live baby. I cannot begin to understand why we must travel this road, but know that you are not alone here! (((HUGS)))