FA 20 questions

Borst-Plotz

I have a ton of questions to ask you guys. So here goes...

1.) How many foster children did you have before being able to adopt?

2.) How long after you got approved did you get your first placement?

3.) I heard someone actually got a placement during their 30 hours of training, they just had to make sure to attend the finals 3/4 meetings. Is that true? Can you get a placement while still in training if everything else is done?

4.) If you were willing to take on siblies, did you prepare for 2? We have a nursery all ready to go and also have a guest bedroom with a full size bed. Right now the guest bedroom is doubling as my craft room and I didn't know if we should clean it out and make it more child friendly? Or did you just wait and see?

5.) How the heck do you prepare for this?! We would like to foster 0-18mths but with such a huge age difference I don't even know where to start. Do I get a travel system or a toddler car seat. What about a bed? Clothing? Etc!

These are the few questions on my mind lately. Most of the others I could find on the FA website for Iowa. Thanks Ladies!

**Another question...just talked to a girl I went to HS with and she works with DHS. She said it's pretty difficult to get a newborn/baby (0-12mnths). I've heard this quite a bit but then see so many people fostering babies. Is this true or is she just trying to caution us?

Jennifer Webb

1. My husband had four foster children (before and while we were dating). We now have one foster daughter - who is 8 months - and depending on how her mom does in rehab, we may or may not adopt.

 2. Hahah - Our foster daughter is a relative and we got her in about 1 month from the time we were approved. I laugh, though, because DYFS (in NJ) called us for a placement less than a week after we had everything completed.

3. Yes, I know in NJ that that has happened - usually when its KLG (kinship legal guardian = family!).

4. I would just wait and see - but I never took in siblings. You never know what you will be offered.

5. We read a lot and, once we knew how old the baby was, we let friends and family know. We were overwhelmed with all the things that we received. August 1 will make month number 5 that we had her and I have yet to buy her clothes or toys because of all the things that we receied. As for car seats and beds - check with your DYFS office. DYFS bought us a crib and continues to buy car seats as the child gets bigger. Also, if the child was already placed in a different home, they will "come" with things - clothes, strollers, carseats, beds, etc.

ctbride08

We are at the end of our licensing process but havent yet taken on a placement so I'll answer what i can with that in mind

Borst-Plotz:

I have a ton of questions to ask you guys. So here goes...

1.) How many foster children did you have before being able to adopt? No personal story to share, but from speakign with other parents, this is really situation specific.  Some foster parents adopt thier first placement, others go years without adopting (and others never adopt, by choice).  Just be very clear with your agency on what your goal is.  If you only want to foster to adopt, then make sure you are only taking in low risk placements. 

2.) How long after you got approved did you get your first placement? Our homestudy was in April and we were told shortly after that we had passed.  However, there are a number of people that need to review and approve our file so its a loooooong time between home study and placement.  We finished all training/home studies/ppwk in early May and are still waiting on final approval.  I've heard that placement happens very quickly after approval.

3.) I heard someone actually got a placement during their 30 hours of training, they just had to make sure to attend the finals 3/4 meetings. Is that true? Can you get a placement while still in training if everything else is done?  I suppose its possible, but I've never heard of it happening to any of the foster parents I've spoken with and it didnt happen to anyone in our training class.

4.) If you were willing to take on siblies, did you prepare for 2? Similar to you, we have one room fully set up as a nursery and prepped for 1 child.  If we get placed with a sibling, we do have another crib (in the attic) and a full bed.  So we could be ready with a few hours notice - that was more than suffient for our home study. In fact, we were approved for up to 3 children with our current set up.

if you'd like to see pics of the nursery check here

5.) How the heck do you prepare for this?!  I was overwhelmed also, but just take it one piece at a time and you'll be fine! The biggest thing is to focus on the basics and choose items that will get you through a range of ages.  For example, our crib converts to a toddler bed.  For car seats we have the infant seat, then one that converts rear to front facing and is good for 5-50lbs.  As for clothing, we have a couple gender nuetral items for each size.  Basically enough to get us through a day or two until we are able to shop specifically for the child that we've been placed with (same for diapers).

It seems like so much at the beginning, but i promise, it is manageable! Good luck

MyColonyNJ

When I saw the post title, I really thought it was going to be 20 questions - I was thrilled that there was not that many

Here are my answers

1.) How many foster children did you have before being able to adopt?  I am currently on my first placement.  So, I can't tell you for sure.  But, since each case is so unique, this is so hard to answer.  I am a member of adoption.com message boards, they have a foster care section.  I see tons of people on there that have adopted their first placement.  Our case is so up in the air right now, but it does have a good chance of going towards adoption

2.) How long after you got approved did you get your first placement?  We had our final home (licensing) inspection on 2/23 and got our first placement phone call around 2/27.  We did not take this placement as it was WAY out of our age range.  At this point, we did not even have verification that we were licensed.  On 3/3, we got another call, which we also had to turn down.

We found out on 3/6 about a situtation where current foster parents had a child for a few days and it was just not working out for them.  We were able to talk to his caseworker and were able to meet the child a few days later.  Lil J was placed with us on 3/11.  So, this was just a few short weeks after our final home inspection.

3.) I heard someone actually got a placement during their 30 hours of training, they just had to make sure to attend the finals 3/4 meetings. Is that true? Can you get a placement while still in training if everything else is done?  I would think this would totally depend on the family.  But, yes - I can see this happening.  If your county is very overloaded and a situation comes up, they may consider someone who is still in training. 

We did our training first, and then all the homestudy stuff, references, etc.  So, this would never happen in our situation.  But, classes are held only at certain times, therefore, some people do the home study first, then reference then the classes.  If the classes are done last, I could see how this type of placement mgiht be possible

4.) If you were willing to take on siblies, did you prepare for 2? We have a nursery all ready to go and also have a guest bedroom with a full size bed. Right now the guest bedroom is doubling as my craft room and I didn't know if we should clean it out and make it more child friendly? Or did you just wait and see?  We were licensed for 3 children in our one extra room.  We knew that we would only take 2 max.  We were going to be licensed for 0-5 yrs old - and in our state, you have to be ready for all "types" of placements.

This meant that we needed to have a crib and a bed set up in the room - or at least very easily set up.  So, we had a crib and a twin bed all set up.  We also had a changing table in there as well.  But as far as getting it ready, i figured that would be easy enough to do after we got placement.

When we found out that we were getting Lil J, we went out and got bedding with a character that I knew he liked.

5.) How the heck do you prepare for this?! We would like to foster 0-18mths but with such a huge age difference I don't even know where to start. Do I get a travel system or a toddler car seat. What about a bed? Clothing? Etc!   I started gettting stuff off of freecycle.  Which I LOVE!!!!!!  We have a garage and a huge attic.  So, I knew that I could just stash away what we got and if we never used them, I knew that I would be able to either freecycle them again, or give them to other foster parents.

We were able to get clothes, gear (stoller, bathtub, activity mats, car seats, etc).  Like I said, we had the space, so I took whatever I could get.  I also asked family for hand-me-downs.

I would try to get as much as you can.  I have heard that sometimes the child will come with a carseat, but sometimes, they come IN a carseat and you have to supply.  I know in my state, I have been told that they would either supply one, or reimburse me for one.  I have yet to do this, so who knows.

I know Fred bought some stuff and when the children left, they left in the car seats that she bought.  I would check with your caseworker to see what they would provide.

One thing that is VERY important - if you get second hand car-seats, make sure that they have not been in an accident and are not expired.  You can see the expiration date on the back of the seat.  It is not a sticker, it is actaually in the plastic of the seat.

It turns out that we are now pregnant, and we have lots of stuff because we collected so much before we got little J.

Oh - and I was thrilled that we had some clothes.  Becasue Lil J came with the clothes on his back.  So, at least I had some stuff until I could get to the store.

come*on*baby

1.) How many foster children did you have before being able to adopt?

we're on 4, 5, 6 placements, but we're hoping to adopt a child unrelated to the ones that have been in our home. we have been selected with one other family for possible adoption of him. All of our placements have gone to relatives. You could possibly get your first placement and be able to adopt that child.

 2.) How long after you got approved did you get your first placement?

Technically we already had a placement lined up before getting our license, but it was only by a few hours because they had already scheduled to come out to hand over the license and some signing. The child arrived 1 hour after we got our license.

3.) I heard someone actually got a placement during their 30 hours of training, they just had to make sure to attend the finals 3/4 meetings. Is that true? Can you get a placement while still in training if everything else is done?

I know with our agency - that would be untrue. 

4.) If you were willing to take on siblies, did you prepare for 2? We have a nursery all ready to go and also have a guest bedroom with a full size bed. Right now the guest bedroom is doubling as my craft room and I didn't know if we should clean it out and make it more child friendly? Or did you just wait and see?

The first time out - we only prepared for 1 child. Then we moved up to 2 and the nursery had a crib and twin bed. Now we have a 9 year old with a queen in a room that use to be our office and the nursery has a twin and 2 cribs. 

5.) How the heck do you prepare for this?! We would like to foster 0-18mths but with such a huge age difference I don't even know where to start. Do I get a travel system or a toddler car seat. What about a bed? Clothing? Etc!

Its more of a mental preparation. If you have family near, it's ALWAYS helpful. We got an infant seat as a gift because we made it clear we wanted an infant to begin with. The first toddler we got, my mom ran to Babies R Us and bought clothes and a car seat while did all the paperwork and such. With 0-18 months - they'll be in a crib so that's the only bed you need. Clothing - for the infants we went to a consignment shop and stocked up on a range of sizes and neutral things. 

 

Everyone says it's difficult to get an infant/newborn - I actually disagree. I've seen plenty of families in our agency and previous agency with infants. We've had 2 ourselves. If you have any more general FA questions, definitely feel free to let me know.  

come*on*baby

also - i count the children and placements all the same as you have to sign your life away on the placement papers!!! we've had a single, a sibling set of 2 and a sibling set of 3.

come*on*baby

fred - I was answering the very end of her OP. I didn't read any replies until after I replied.

2bWednDec

 

1.) How many foster children did you have before being able to adopt? 1 was reunited.  I'm on my 2nd and moving towards adoption

2.) How long after you got approved did you get your first placement? 2 months

3.) I heard someone actually got a placement during their 30 hours of training, they just had to make sure to attend the finals 3/4 meetings. Is that true? Can you get a placement while still in training if everything else is done? at my agency you couldn't even start a homestudy until after training, so that was not a possibility.  Is it possible they received a NREFM (non related extended family member) which is like a friends kid or something?  Because I know that would have been possible.

4.) If you were willing to take on siblies, did you prepare for 2? We have a nursery all ready to go and also have a guest bedroom with a full size bed. Right now the guest bedroom is doubling as my craft room and I didn't know if we should clean it out and make it more child friendly? Or did you just wait and see? We waited to see even with the 1st child.  We had no idea on age or gender so I didn't want to prepare a room.  I'm sooo happy my agency didn't require it. They claimed they did in our classes but we kept moving foward and nobody cared we never had it ready.  They just cared we had the space.  Placement #1 ended up being a 2 yr old and she came with TONS of her own things.  Placement #2 was a newborn girl and my sister just had a girl one year ago so she passed down everything!  I'm so glad I didn't buy unnecessary items.

5.) How the heck do you prepare for this?! We would like to foster 0-18mths but with such a huge age difference I don't even know where to start. Do I get a travel system or a toddler car seat. What about a bed? Clothing? Etc! Again, I had nothing.  I simply told my worker I had a team of help (mom, sister, aunt, friends) that would run out in a heartbeat and buy necessities.  First placement I had some notice, maybe 1 month.  Second placement I had under 1 hour notice, yep, seriously.  My mom ran and bought a bassinet and some other essentials.  If you do this, just be sure you have a heafty savings for it.

These are the few questions on my mind lately. Most of the others I could find on the FA website for Iowa. Thanks Ladies!

**Another question...just talked to a girl I went to HS with and she works with DHS. She said it's pretty difficult to get a newborn/baby (0-12mnths). I've heard this quite a bit but then see so many people fostering babies. Is this true or is she just trying to caution us? We were told it was virtually impossible at our agency, yet I received a newborn we picked up from the hospital.  Totally shocked and unexpected.