So frustrated - ready to give up BFing :(

theweathermanswife

DS was slightly premature (36 weeks), and I was on magnesium during labor, so it made for a very sleepy first few days.  He wasn't really interested in the breast, but took a bottle when I offered pumped milk.  After about a week, I was able to get him to latch on using a nipple shield.  He will nurse for a good 40-45 minutes, and still not seem full (especially at night), but if I try to hand express a little milk to get him interested in latching back on, I can't express any.  In my frustration last night, I offered him a bottle of formula after nursing, and he took an ounce.  The next feeding, I decided to offer him formula and pump, to see just how much I have.  I am barely pumping 2 ounces 2 weeks out - the same amount I was pumping when my milk first came in.  I am getting so frustrated, because it is so much work to pump and then feed him, and now it looks like I don't even have a great supply!  Also, he is still not back to his birthweight - he was 9-4 at birth, and at his pedi on Wed was still 8-7 (same as last Wed).  The pedi was not concerned, but it seems like in a week he should have gained.

I am getting so frustrated with breastfeeding and pumping, and I am about ready to give it up.  Any words of wisdom would be appreciated!  TIA!

kvinh546

Its definitely tough at the beginning but I promise it does get better.  I think its best if you have him latch on b/c as everyone says the baby is way more efficient at getting the milk than a pump...so he's probably getting more while he's latched on than you think.  As long as he's got plenty of wet and dirty diapers you should be fine. 

But its understandable that you need a break from his constant eating.  At two weeks, my DS was eating like every 45 minutes I couldn't handle it.   So if you're pumping, I'd say get someone to feed him the bottle while you pump that way you're not having to do everything!  

Best advice is just to make short goals for youself. Like say you're gonna do this til he's one month, then when you make it there, assess and see if you can do it for another month.  That helped a lot of my friends out and most of them ended up doing for an entire year.  

cateye

My daughter was born at 35 weeks and we also had a rough start due to everything they gave me during delivery.  After doing a lot of reading and letting DD guide me, I realized that even though she was healthy and we were home, she was still born a month early and I needed to take that into account.  She got tired a lot faster than most newborns, which lead to longer nursing sessions that got less out.  Some days, I felt like we nursed around the clock.  I also tried pumping to supplement, but never got more than an ounce or two at a time.  I think that may have been all she ate at a session, but some women also have a hard time pumping.  I ended up giving up pumping and just nursed her exclusively.  This obviously is not an option for everyone, but it worked for us since I'm a SAHM.  But if you need/want to pump, just remember that the more you pump, the more you will produce. 

 

As for the weight, my daughter didn't gain her birth weight back until almost  a month old.  Part of this was because we had issues with jaundice (which pre-term babies are more susceptible to, especially if they're breastfed, so keep an eye on that), but if the doctor isn't worried, you don't need to worry.  

 Hang in there.  It gets easier.  And the rewards are great.  But if it doesn't work out for you, that is okay, too.  Just make whatever decision is best for you and your family.  

eb2277

Hang in there!  Check out the forums on kellymom.com - they are very supportive over there and have lots of advice and offer great encouragement.  I think I would have quit in the beginning if it hadn't been for them.  I definately agree with making short term goals.  It really does get easier although it may not feel like it at the time.  A nursing baby is much more efficient than pumping.  I also recommend getting a big pile of movies and just camp out on the couch.  Once I started to relax about the constant nursing (completely normal) and made it fun, it became much more enjoyable. 

kmmancil

aww, I'm sorry, I've been there.  It takes a couple weeks for baby to get back to his birth weight, so don't worry.  And yeah, baby gets into weird phases where it seems like they spend 23 1/2 of 24 hours on the boob (i'm exaggerating on that one).  No one will fault you for being frustrated, and another option you can try if he's being a little booger about nursing still is another visit with the lactation specialist.  It gets better! Good luck

DEBBIE33CASEY

Don't give up!  It is horrible in the beginning.  If you want your baby to receive breast milk at least pump and bottle feed.  Pump/nurse often.  It didn't work out BFing DD, too sleepy, and hour long nursing sessions that left me uncomfortable and sore.  Even though pumping exclusively isn't my favorite thing and I invision BFing to be more rewarding I am happy she is getting the immunities and benefits of BM.

Keep with it.  I agree with making small goals too. I did that.  I told myself 3 weeks, then 6 weeks, and now I'm at 3 months and still going. You can increase your supply by bf or pumping at LEAST every 2 hours.  It is time consuming but you'll be glad you did

mrsrobinsontobe

you've been given some great advice...just want to add...don't worry about not pumping much right now...it's totally normal!

theweathermanswife

Thanks for all of the advice.  I'm still not sure what I'm going to do.  I'm going to try to pump every 2 hours during the day so I can space it out some at night.  I just don't know if I can keep up with the pumping.  I cry every time I think about pumping.  BFing DS directly is difficult with his latching problems, even with a nipple shield, and I think pumping is the way it is going to have to be.  I am trying to think about it one day at a time for now.  DH is also being really supportive, which helps.