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Totally need to vent (selfish and NSAIFR)

ShainaShaina
in Success after IF

So, with the twins, having in-laws in Fla all winter and my dad FINALLY haveing a social life after years of taking care of my mom, DH and I haven't gotten out much alone.  Granted, we've been in  over the long winter and been with our awesome girls but they are practically 8 months old, on a great schedule, STTN and all we have to do is get them down by 7-ish and they are down for the night.  To have someone 'watch' them would literally be someone in the house watching TV while we are out.  So agin., DH and I have only gone out alone a handful of times since the girls have been born.  Well, my in-laws are up for about 3 weeks.  What happens?  SIL (DH'S sis) 'books' my in-laws for babysitting for the next few Saturdays.  She is a SAHM w/ a part-time nanny and her kids are 3 and 6.  She gets out plenty during the week and even alone with her DH sometimes.  I work F/T and the only time DH and I get together are in front of the TV 2-3 hours a night b/f we collapse in bed.  We would like to go out and we both got really pissed whe nwe found this out.  My IL's are alwayas saying that whenever they are in, they'l babysit so we can go out. Well, now they are' booked' so Sat nights are out, Fri--DH and I are WIPED from the week--we could go out then, but quite honestly, after getting home, feeding and putting babies to sleep and taking nanny to train, we are xhausted.  Yes, they are free during some weekend days but we really wanted a date night and they are not even sure if they are free on all the Fridays they'll be here b/c they didm ake some plans to see some friends.

Sorry for all this rambling.  We just got really pissed...we both bust our asses all week, never have a babysitter to go out alone and when they are in, they are already mostly 'booked'.  I guess I just needed to get this out.  And sorry if I sound whiney too.  I am just tired too.  :-P

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Re: Totally need to vent (selfish and NSAIFR)

  • cjsbdlcjsbdl member

    Wow, that's pretty crappy of her. I'm sorry. Sad It sucks when family is so inconsiderate.

    ETA: If it were me, I would totally have my husband say something to the ILs...you know they would probably be thrilled to babysit the twins...let them be the ones to tell SIL she has to give up one  of her Sat nights.

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  • Carrie25Carrie25

    Can you see if your SIL would give up one of her 'booked' nights for you and your DH to have a date night?  That's terrible that she took all the Saturday nights.  See if she'll compromise. 

    I would come watch or 'sit' with the girls if I were closer!!  Good luck getting her to switch and be more fair.  Do you have any trustworthy/reliable teenager with experience to babysit?  

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  • Waiting4baby08Waiting4baby08
    That sounds like a valid complaint.  You have twins and have to work so hard.  I would think that she would be trying to get you out for a night instead of booking up every Saturday.  Hugs.
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  • jlc071903jlc071903 member
    That sucks. Your DH needs to call his parents and lay on a serious guilt trip and mention MUCH of what you put in your post. If they are in town for 3 weekends then they can give you at least 1 Sat night...that's crappy of your SIL. I'm sorry. :(
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  • KellyOsu23KellyOsu23

    Shaina- Understand where you are coming from

    But go out on Sunday- Just go early

    You will be well-rested plus who cares if its sunday

    I mean its you and DH, your parents Its still just a day with you together.

    Start Early- may a "linner" lunch/dinner combo and a movie and then some drinks afterwards?!

    me and DH do this alot because we have same issues, although ours are are parents hit their midlife crisis and now go out on Sat, lol :)

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  • 12106mrsmun12106mrsmun
    I would be irritated too!!  I hope you and your SIL/ILs are able to come up with a compromise.
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  • EverAfterinMiEverAfterinMi
    Shame on your IL's for saying yes to your SIL for every Saturday. They should have thought better and reserved some time for their other grandchildren. I agree with above.. your dh should call them and be like.. WTF? For real? Dude.. I'd be peeved too!
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  • dundasgirldundasgirl

    Hi, I think that is awful of your SIL to be so inconsiderate!

    If your girls are in daycare, is there anyone there who you could ask to be a baby-sitter on the occasional Saturday night?  That way you know that they are trained and responsible?

    Tommy and I were just discussing how it is easy for us to ask one of our friends who don't have kids to baby-sit now, but when we have a newborn again + Reed, we won't be going out for a long long time!

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