HTT: Your opinion on agencies/countries/etc. that refuse adoptions to...

candm

What is your opinion on agencies, orphanages and/or countries that refuse to adopt to certain individuals/couples because of: 1) their religion or 2) their sexual orientation. Would you still work with that agency/orphanage/country?

candm

It bothers me a lot. I saw a lot of orphanages in Haiti that would not adopt to non-evangelical Christians. To me it is wrong and immoral to say a child is better off in poverty than to live with a family of X religion (or atheist, etc).

Haiti does not permit adoption to same sex couples. That bothers me for the same reason, yet, we're still willing (obviously) to adopt from Haiti. I'm not sure if that makes me a hypocrite, but we were hooked on Haiti pretty early on despite this.

pepomntpat

This sort of argument reminds me of when I was a child and making sandwiches for the homeless with my church.  We were making such a variety of sandwiches and I said that people who were so hungry shouldn't be so picky!  My mother told me even hungry people have a right to choose what they eat.

So, when it comes to a country and a certain culture that is different from ours, I think they have every right to be as strict as they feel it is necessary to place their children.  They want their children to have the very, very best, not just something good enough.  To them that means Christian, married people.  That may not be accurate, but they have a different perspective than those of us in the US.

For an American agency I have less patience.  We are a land of equal opportunity and hypocrasy in that vein ticks me off.

jacksjerseygirl

We thought a lot about this. My mom is gay and lives with her partner, they will have a commitment ceremony next month too.

Since we are jewish/agnostic we did not obviously select an agency that was religiously affiliated. Our agency does not adopt to homosexuals.

I wanted to be difficult and to hold fast to my personal beliefs, but in the end we chose an agency that was right for US. Our agency is perfect for us, they would not be perfect for homosexuals or single people. I can't force my beliefs on other people, and I will not allow others to force their belief's on me. We may not have found the 'right agency for us' had we decided to work with only agencies that believe as we do about issues unrelated to adoption.

 

Dr.Loretta

Are we talking about private agencies? They can do what they want, and it's my choice to go with them or not. I suppose I'd still work with them if that's the agency I was most comfortable with.

silliestbunny

This is a tough one.  We are working with a law office/agency which allows singles and same-gendered couples adopt.  I have no problems.  In fact, I think it's great that there are options for singles and same-gendered couples. 

However, I can understand why some agencies don't open their doors to everyone.  I live in a very liberal and progressive community.  Other agencies may feel that the best home is a Christ-centered, two parent of the same gender household.  I want to believe that these agencies make their decision based on what they truly believe is best for the child and not some political/religous conservative rationale. 

I should add that I tend to be politically conservative, especially in fiscal matters.  I am also a proud, praticing Catholic (and we know where the Church is on GLBT issues).  But, living in my world, I know that there are many great "families" that don't fit the stereotypical mom/dad/2.5 kids.  There are also lovely people who'd make great parents that don't fit that typical mold.  So even as somewhat conservative Catholic gal, I being open to non-traditional families.

TTCgradstud

I'm not sure that I would eliminate an entire country (but I'm also not interested in IA right now).  But we definitely eliminated agencies that refused to work with same-sex couples, because we were not comfortable working with an agency that thought sexual orientation decided if someone could be a parent.  I know there was an agency that stopped working with Massachusetts' families because when gay marriage became legal they could no longer use the "must be married" as a way to eliminate working with same-sex couples.

Religion doesn't bother me as much- if the agency has a religious affiliation that is something that I assume matters to the birthparents, so if we were not that religion we wouldn't be a good match.