40 Days

bluhbluh

I’ve been hearing more about a postpartum quarantine where the new mom stays at home and really focuses on recovery- no (or few) chores, lots of soups, belly binding, among other rules- and I was wondering if anyone here practices that in their culture. Or if not, if anyone else has looked into it and is thinking of doing it? 

socalsci

I'll probably end up doing something like this. It's a part of husband and MIL's culture, and she's already brought it up (she lives with us and would be helping out a lot). I think it would be kind of nice to have that time to really focus on recovery, but I do worry about getting a little bored if she tries to make me sit around and do nothing the whole time.

00kim00

It's common in my husband's culture, but it's 100 days. It's called "confinement", and typically the new mom's mom or MIL (baby's grandma) takes care of the new mom and baby. When my sister in law had her kids, my MIL stayed with them for almost a year, and the baby actually slept in grandma's room. The new mom didn't go out alone with the baby until after the 100 days was up- if she had to take him to the doctor's or something, grandma came along. There's also special foods they make for the new mama (my sister in law loved it, but the confinement soup doesn't sound good to my tastes!). This is my first, and my in-laws will be staying with us for a couple of months after the birth, but probably not the full 100 days. I'll also have to be back at work before the hundred days are up, unfortunately! I'm fine with them helping with cooking and the house (I also have a 14 year old stepson and really want them to focus on him during this time so I'm can focus on the baby), and of course getting time to bond with the baby (and maybe give me time to shower  )but baby's sleeping in my room, and my husband and I will be his primary caregivers, not grandma. So we're blending cultural practices, like we usually do!

narwhal33

In my husband's culture and country (where we live) it's typical to have 30 days of "confinement" but how strict that is varies. You can hire a confinement nanny who cooks all these nutritious foods for you helps care for you and the baby as you heal. More popular are postpartum confinement centers where there are baby nurses to care for your baby in between feedings and nutritious foods are delivered to your door and they have doctors come and check on your wounds and lactation consultants and postpartum yoga etc. They're super expensive, but you, partner, and baby basically move in for anywhere between 2 weeks to a month usually (tho some places let you stay longer!). We decided to splurge and do this bc I am a FTM and don't have family close by to help me and I'd just feel better if there is that extra help. I'm prone to depression so I worried going straight home to deal with this myself would be overwhelming and give me PPD! 

Ive heard that the strictest rules are like don't leave your bed, don't open windows, don't wash your hair for like a month, but yeah I'm not doing that. Already told husband we will be sneaking in McDonald's and sushi and going out for walks. I might even be bad and skip waking up for all the nightly feedings and ask husband to bottle feed w pumped milk instead (the center actually encourages you to even use formula for night feedings so you can get maximum rest and recovery but I don't want to risk my baby getting an aversion to my breast milk or my boobs stop producing milk).