Bachelorette Party Advice

otwp9

Hello, I am fairly newly pregnant (7 weeks currently) I am one of 2 maids of honors in an upcoming wedding in August 2022. The bachelorette party is at the end of April when I will be 10-11 weeks pregnant. My pregnancy so far has be been a lot of fatigue and near constant nausea (no vomiting yet). I also have high sensitivity to smells and food aversions. The bachelorette party is a weekend long trip to Nashville with activities including: pole dancing, party bus, bowling, and bar hopping. For some context on why I’m hesitant, we are traveling by plane, I tend to get sick on planes normally in addition, most of the evening activities start at 830/9pm and that’s usually when I’ve fallen asleep since becoming pregnant. I’m looking for recommendations on whether or not I should go, if I do go I’m worried I’ll be miserable and no fun to be around and I really don’t want to ruin the brides time or feel like a burden to anyone. Any advice, thoughts, recommendations, etc would be sincerely appreciated!

PurplePumpernickel

Only you can determine what is best for you. I think there are a few factors at play:

How financially deep in this are you? Are your tickets refundable (or can you get a travel credit)? If you don't attend, are you making the cost higher for everyone else? If so, can you afford to still pay part so people aren't suddenly stuck with a higher cost for events/lodging? When would you need to figure this all out?

If you think you'd be miserable, it may be better for you to not go (it seems like that is how you're leaning too). I'd let the bride know, and the co-MOH. Again, if you are feeling guilty and are financially able to do so, it may be nice to take the bride out for a meal or spring for a spa treatment if she lives far away. BUT that is not a requirement.

swizzlemalarkey

If you’ve already bought everything (tix & hotel room) and the plane ride isn’t too long, then I’d probably go unless I could get fully refunded. You might feel better by then anyway. You can always just participate in the activities that you feel comfortable with or can do. No one should hold it against you if they’re decent human beings. I just don’t understand this trend of big bachelorette party weekends. Like why? Lol but I digress. Just do what you’re comfortable with and people will (should) understand. 

peppermint1119

I’m in a similar situation. I’m a bridesmaid in a wedding that’s in 2022. The bachelorette party is a weekend long trip in June with a 7 hour drive and then a party bus to a bunch of wineries. I’m only 6 weeks so how I’m feeling will probably be totally different by June but the bride is requesting payment now. I’ve been getting super car sick and obviously can’t drink wine. But we haven’t told anyone that I’m pregnant yet. I’m hoping the bride won’t bring up the money again for a few weeks and by then we will have had our first ultrasound and will start telling people about the pregnancy and can just explain my situation to the bride. 

tming

My sister’s bachelorette party was actually just this past weekend, which I had planned. Luckily due to the horrible pregnancy symptoms I’ve had, my sister’s friends pitched in to help me plan. I had hoped that I would be feeling well enough to actually go, but the symptoms have not let up. I will be 12 weeks tomorrow and still experiencing them. As you can imagine, I was extremely disappointed but decided to make the choice to do what was best for me and baby and not go. I just knew I would not be able to handle it mentally or physically at this time. That all said, you have to gauge what is right for you based on your symptoms. Everyone’s experience is different. Just know that it’s perfectly fine to put yours and your baby’s needs first right now! And I’m sure you’ll be feeling great by the time the wedding rolls around-funny my sister’s is also in August!