@paytonpedro oh nooo. That sucks so much! I am a sympathetic puker so I have been there. And now my kids also worry that I’m going to puke for things that normally would be fine now that I’m pregnant. 😝 “Mom, don’t come in here.” Scariest sentence ever.
And to go back to the it feels differently now sentiments… I feel the same way. I have the pictures to do a super cute Valentine’s Day announcement Monday and I can’t decide if I’m ready for everyone to know or not. 😝
@paytonpedro ugh, I'm so sorry. Dealing with that is the worst and frankly I don't think I could have kept it together. Hopefully he is feeling better soon.
@paytonpedro MH has a super sensitive gag reflex. He would not have been able to handle that! I think I would've even had a problem. That's A LOT to deal with. Ugh.
I'm jumping into to say...we had to say goodbye to our cat yesterday. It was an extremely emotional day and I'm gonna take a bit of time to recover. He was truly the sweetest most tolerant cat I've ever met. I kept wishing there was a different option but it's not like he was going to magically stop aging. And he was in pain...I just couldn't prolong it any more just because I want him around forever. Needless to say, we are sad.
@paytonpedro I threw up a little just reading it. Should have known better! 😂
@starkette I’m so sorry. We had to put my old man grump cat down in June and while - like you - I know it was the right decision, it was the worst choice I’d ever had to make. I’ll be thinking about you.
@fuzzywombat I’m sorry I missed you! I must have been typing. I’m so sorry for your loss as well. Pets just don’t live long enough. 😭
@starkette I am so sorry for the loss of your kitty. It’s totally not fair that our pets don’t live as long as we do. I hope you find peace in your decision, I’m sure your boy appreciated all the love you guys gave him over the years. ❤️
@fuzzywombat I’m also so sorry you lost your kitty too. It’s so hard to say good bye to a member of the family.
thank you, everyone. I keep going back and forth wondering if there was more we could've done but even the vet told us it was either now or very soon...due to his pain levels. He was FIV+ and lived until he was 18 years old.
@starkette@fuzzywombat I’m so sorry you had to say goodbye to your cats. These animals are really part of the family, and it’s not fair how little time we get with them.
@paytonpedro Ughhh, that sounds awful. Hope he is feeling better.
Ugh, my word association must have gone in a second too late. I saw stop, and said collaborate, and was hoping someone would pick up on it and say listen next, but @mdfarmchick you snuck go in there and then my collaborate didn't make sense anymore. 😂
So my MIL is a jerk and she’s a petty one. She didn’t speak to me basically from the time that I gave birth to #3 last January until November for Christmas gifts unless she was here visiting for the birth, where she once again, not in front of my husband, but in front of my children, brought up my “future divorce.” 🤬 and she also was horrible to my oldest and doesn’t know it yet but she can get a hotel from now on. So three weeks after starting to talk to me in November, in December when she found out we were going to my parents for Christmas after not traveling for 5 Christmases, she went back to no longer speaking to me. Well she gifted my boys swim lessons for Christmas, so after the first lesson I called her so they could thank her. While we were chatting I decided to mention how my cousins all told him at the wedding last summer that #2 looks exactly like me at his age and he acts like me too… because DS1 looks so much like his dad it’s wild. And I was trying to not have awkward conversation. So. She has never called and wished #2 Happy Birthday. Not for his first ((“you weren’t home so I couldn’t call you”—we spent 10 days in Denver on a work trip for MH)). Not for his second or third because “HER family is there so I can’t talk to him.” 🙄🙄🙄 Weird. Everyone else was able to call him and wish him a Happy Birthday. Whatever. But also, she sent a birthday gift to DS1 every year until last year but never bough DS2 a birthday gift. So it just makes me mad. Please note that DS3 also did not get a birthday gift for his first birthday this year.
I unfriended her and my SIL on Facebook after we announced the pregnancy to them because my SIL was a total jerk about me traveling to the east coast when DS1 gets out of school, on the phone, in front of my kids, when she knew I could hear her. I’ve been blocking them from my pictures for months now because they steal them and then post them, public posts on Facebook no less, and it makes me furious, and I was looking forward to just posting things without having to block people.
So on my birthday post for DS2, she posts a picture of MH as a “4 year old” and says, doesn’t he look just like his dad. And then MH told me she stole one of my pictures from his birthday post to post a comparison on her Facebook page publicly so her friends could all comment that he looks like MH. So now I told MH that I will no longer be tagging him in any of my posts because the whole point is that they don’t get access to my kids photos when they don’t bother to call them or visit, and that they don’t post them publicly! I am so beyond pissed right now. MH finally agreed to talk to both MIL and SIL about how they cannot post about us or him publicly because of the job he is interviewing for—which is great, but also makes me mad because he didn’t take care of it for me or the kids, but he will take care of it for his job.
@mdfarmchick wow she does sound petty. I’d be pretty livid about that. Totally unacceptable. Im really sorry. We didn’t tell SIL about the baby because she made a comment about #4 being too many and how we were ruining the planet blah blah blah.
@mdfarmchick with as much respect as I can muster up after reading this, FU*K that woman. The fact she thinks she can talk to you that way and treat you and your kids poorly is disgusting. I would completely cut her off. No contact and she wouldn’t be able to see or meet the new baby. I’m sorry your H hasn’t stood up to them in your defense.
@and_peggy your SIL can go in the same category as her MIL. Nasty women
@mdfarmchick whoa! Her level of aggressive-aggressiveness towards you and your kids is beyond anything I'd tolerate. I'm with @wigglyicecream on this one. I'd be so pissed, F Her. I'm so sorry that you have such nasty people in your life! And that your H didn't do anything about it before now. He's probably just used to dealing with it by ignoring because he's had to his whole life, not realizing that their behavior is not okay.
@and_peggy your SIL can kick rocks with no socks! I'm sorry, but who says that kind of stuff to people? I can't not say something back.
@bridgiebee82 I didn’t even know she said anything about it until a few weeks ago. I asked DH if he told his sister about the baby and he said nope, he didn’t think she deserved to know after how she treated him about #4. And that’s when I found out. She’s not dumb enough to say those things to me because she knows I’m not the nonreactive type.
@and_peggy don’t worry, my MIL told me before I had my first baby that everyone should stop at 2 because no one could afford to have more than two kids these days and it is completely irresponsible. So I feel ya. I was thinking about not telling my ILs this time but it wasn’t really an option. 😝 Anyway your SIL is a total jerk and I’m glad YH didn’t tell her about blessing #5.
@bridgiebee82, you get it. I don’t think he even knew how horribly they treat him or talk to him because it’s been that way his whole life. It’s definitely a process and it is very hard for him to cut them off entirely. 😕
@wigglyicecream I discovered a year ago that I actually don’t have to do anything for someone who so obviously doesn’t respect me and I have to say the 10 months of her and my SIL mostly not speaking to me was really refreshing. I have no effs left to give and that has been very freeing. But I have done my very best to be respectful of MH as he works through his feelings and faces that his parents play favorites with their children and grandchildren and that they have to be held accountable when they do things to hurt our children.
@mdfarmchick sounds like you are in a great place and holding space for you husband and his feelings show that you’re significantly more emotionally mature than most. I’m happy you have realized their absence from your life was/is a blessing
I just had a random thought that spiraled way too far. 😂 I was a private swim instructor for many years. At some point my child will need to learn how to swim. We’ll need to enroll them in lessons somewhere (because a. I don’t want to teach my own kid and b. we don’t have daily access to a pool). I just informed my husband that he’ll be the one taking the kid to swim lessons otherwise I’ll just sit there and (silently) be too harsh of a critic of the instructor. He was probably like “okay crazy lady, that’s like 3 years from now, chill out” but luckily he knows better than to say that.
@mdfarmchick I am so sorry you have to deal with someone so vile. I have a tumultuous relationship with my own mother where we go periods not talking, she didn’t call ds2 for his second birthday or even send a card, and is very passive aggressive. But then she’ll go and tell every person who will talk to her about my children and how much she loves them sooo much yata yata but can never call them- or me. I also had to ask her to stop stealing my pictures on fb and posting them on hers public when I was on there. So I’m here to say I understand your situation and yh really needs to put his foot down with her. It’s not fair to you.
@mdfarmchick@and_peggy hoooooooooooo boy. No chance in hell I’d speak to them ever again. Seriously F them. What horrible things to say to / about people. Ugh.
I just got a chance to read through all the comments, specifically about how many kids is “appropriate”. My mil thought she had some say in my uterus and our bedroom, and repeatedly told mh we shouldn’t have a #3. Saying she wouldn’t watch 3 kids, we don’t have room (which it is tight but still our decision) and other things that are just snooty. It was to the point mh didn’t even want to say something to her right away. People, especially mil’s, need to just mind their own business and know their place.
RE: OP thinking they have a say about how many kids you have. They do not. The only people who have a say is yourself and your partner. Anyone else can just go fly a kite. My BIL said "really? Isn't your house too small?" when we announced we were having a second. Like no congrats, just that. We have (for the record) a 3 bedroom house & plans to move in the next year or two because space is tight. But that's none of BIL's business. We just let it slide because we refuse to justify our reasoning to anyone else.
@mdfarmchick your ML sounds toxic and I'm glad you're limiting contact. Personally, I'd turn over all communication with his mother to YH. You don't need a relationship with her & honestly I'm doubtful your kids do either with the way she treats them.
Re: Weekly Randoms 2/7
I'm jumping into to say...we had to say goodbye to our cat yesterday. It was an extremely emotional day and I'm gonna take a bit of time to recover. He was truly the sweetest most tolerant cat I've ever met. I kept wishing there was a different option but it's not like he was going to magically stop aging. And he was in pain...I just couldn't prolong it any more just because I want him around forever. Needless to say, we are sad.
@starkette I’m so sorry. We had to put my old man grump cat down in June and while - like you - I know it was the right decision, it was the worst choice I’d ever had to make. I’ll be thinking about you.
@paytonpedro Ughhh, that sounds awful. Hope he is feeling better.
5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
@and_peggy your SIL can kick rocks with no socks! I'm sorry, but who says that kind of stuff to people? I can't not say something back.
Love you ladies.
5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
@bridgiebee82, you get it. I don’t think he even knew how horribly they treat him or talk to him because it’s been that way his whole life. It’s definitely a process and it is very hard for him to cut them off entirely. 😕
@wigglyicecream I discovered a year ago that I actually don’t have to do anything for someone who so obviously doesn’t respect me and I have to say the 10 months of her and my SIL mostly not speaking to me was really refreshing. I have no effs left to give and that has been very freeing. But I have done my very best to be respectful of MH as he works through his feelings and faces that his parents play favorites with their children and grandchildren and that they have to be held accountable when they do things to hurt our children.
So I’m here to say I understand your situation and yh really needs to put his foot down with her. It’s not fair to you.
@mdfarmchick your ML sounds toxic and I'm glad you're limiting contact. Personally, I'd turn over all communication with his mother to YH. You don't need a relationship with her & honestly I'm doubtful your kids do either with the way she treats them.