Weekly Randoms w/o 9.13

keikilove

acleverusername

I got some scoop y’all on how our beloved fertility trackers work. One of my colleagues reverse-engineered the Mira tracker, and, as expected, there is no “Mira”cles inside it. 

For starters, the way the app “predicts” your fertile window is that it finds your previous fertile window, and adds 28 days to it.

Then, to “analyse” your LH and E2 values, it literally takes a photo of the strip and does the color matching like we all do with our naked eye. The only difference is that it does light up the specific part of the strip and perhaps it provides a slightly more accurate color matching, but I imagine if you’re always taking a photo of your pee stick in the same ambient light, and also using a flash, you’re probably going to end up with the same result. 

Bottom line: “smart” trackers just automate what we do manually and you’re better we wary about putting blind trust into the info they present you with. 

inthewoods23

@acleverusername I thought it gave actual values of LH and E2? Are you saying it's basically like the Premom app that compares the color of the test and control lines to each other?

acleverusername

@inthewoods23 well no, not quite. It works like semi-quantitative strips (i.e. Premom, Modern Fertility), in that it does give an actual value. But that value is derived from the color of the test line. Like these ones: https://www.amazon.com/Premom-Semi-Quantitative-Ovulation-Predictor-Numerical/dp/B07Q3RRHRL

If you look at step number 3, the darkness of the strip signals LH quantity. But it's not exact science. I can do this same thing with my naked eye. 

The threshold based tests work differently. Normally, the threshold to pass is 40mIU/mL. So, if your LH quantity is deemed to be 40mIU/mL, the test strip will be the same color as the control strip, and thus you'll get a score of 1.0 in the Premom app. Anything over is where you get the 1.5, 2.0, etc. 

inthewoods23

@acleverusername ah gotcha. That makes sense!

fantasyflyte

Does anyone have a recommendation for a good body pillow, Amazon preferred since I have Amazon gift cards? I've been waking up with such bad back pain when I sleep in my bed, but if I sleep on the couch, where I can support my back on the back of the couch, I'm fine. But I'd prefer not to need to sleep on the couch forever. I figure a body pillow should be able to give that support but in my bed.

paytonpedro

@fantasyflyte I don’t have a suggestion butttt my backs also been killing me so now I’m curious and following for responses!!

inthewoods23

@fantasyflyte get a pregnancy pillow! Or a generic U-shaped pillow. My MIL got me one for Christmas a couple years ago (no not awkward at all lol /s) and it's like being wrapped up in a hug. It beats your typical rectangular body pillows.

fantasyflyte

@inthewoods23 yeah my amazon search turned up all pregnancy pillows. There's one with 60k reviews so i might just get that one.

acleverusername

Just saw this on hilariously_infertile’s Insta:

https://www.instagram.com/p/CTyMG6RMXRe/?utm_medium=copy_link

I hope some our PCOS-afflicted members can attend!

hgsurvivor

@fantasyflyte I second getting a pregnancy pillows. And yeah not awkward at all from your mil, Eesh. 

More long term, how old is your mattress? Maybe it’s due for an upgrade? 

inthewoods23

Is it just me... or are the worst offenders with these one offs the ones who are going for their 3rd, 4th, or 5th kid? Idk... is it because women who have so many kids only have "being a mom" to define them?

Ugh I'm getting horrible flashbacks from last year's mess over taking too long to conceive I can't suppress that memory deep enough.

bows22

@inthewoods23 the TTC 6 months thread?? Haha 

fantasyflyte

@hgsurvivor mattress is only 6 years old. unfortunately we can't afford to replace it but I think it should still be okay.

inthewoods23

@bows22 Yes I STILL think about that stupid thread!

optimistgardener

@inthewoods23 @bows22 i seem to recall a 22-yr-old who was on here some months ago complaining about why she wasn't pregnant yet after two months while also lecturing us about eating only pure foods, etc.

fantasyflyte

@optimistgardener hoooo I remember that one, that was just...

inthewoods23

@optimistgardener I need to find that one for a good laugh. Wasn't it a long ridiculous list? Half of which if I recall were unrealistic for the average woman both financially and just having the time to even implement it or do it all.

Edit: found it for anyone interested. 20 years old.... and oh yeah, just work less or stop working to reduce stress, because we can all totally afford that right now.
https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12761299/health-discussion#latest

optimistgardener

oh god it is even better than i remember it. i love that she's all "seychelle brand filtered water only!" and "make your own kefir with raw milk!" (seriously? RAW milk?), but also... still vapes. 

acleverusername

@inthewoods23 @bows22 ladies...I  gotta apologies for that 6 months thread. I feel like that was my idea. ☹️ And now look at me... bitterest of the bunch (well, today at least). 

Re: that 20-yr old thread, f*ck... that was a gut punch. Like... your biggest problem is that you can't stop vaping?!?! FFFFFFFÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇQQQQQQQQ. 

I started following @healthyivf on Insta recently (a friend recommended it to me; saying that she was really open about her IVF journey)

***TW*** PLEASE DO NOT LOOK UP that account unless your ready to read very very very sad / unfortunate / heartbreaking stuff about TTC ***END TW***

But one of the things she does is talk about all these ultra healthy stuff that she does: meditation, acupuncture, other special therapies, clean eating, etc, etc, etc. And it makes me think. Frig... she lives in SF and has access to A LOT of things that most people don't both in terms of food (quality) and services but also $. Most of these things aren't accessible to 90% of people struggling to conceive. So, I had to stop reading the posts because even I, who is privileged to be able to access / afford some of the things she mentions, feel like I'm not doing enough and maybe that's why I haven't succeeded. 

Okay, I think I need to get off the Internets for today. I'm in a sour and ranty mood. 

inthewoods23

@acleverusername I don't think that was your idea but it was almost a year ago and at this point I don't remember the details. If anything, I feel like it was suggested with good intentions and then turned into a bitch fest from TFAS people because they felt they no longer related to anyone on cycle 5 or less and waaaahhh they are taking longer than the last time and wanted a place to air these kinds of grievances.

I remember lurking in and suggesting they start up some threads in the secondary IF and TTC a Sibling boards instead and boy was that NOT well received. Even just suggesting they talk about it in the TFAS thread was shot down

acleverusername

@inthewoods23 oh, it's all coming back to me now. The origin of that TTC 6+ was because folks in TFAS were complaining about BFing, and therefore alienating other members of TFAS. Anywho, that thread is best forgotten. 

anniemarie887

this 6 month thing sounds confusing. 

ajsanders-2

Did anyone feel like yesterday Friday the 13th switched to Monday the 13th? It was crazy in the clinic I work in, and it's spilling over into today! I swear it had that Friday the 13th feeling!

acleverusername

@ajsanders-2 today is definitely a "Friday the 13th". Everyone and everything is making me mad. I just had a discussion with my team about prioritization, and I'm like "these are the things we said we should do 2 weeks ago during the rest of the quarter" and they're like "but this other work is more important." And I'm like "I'm the PM (project manager) here... I decide what's more important." 

bows22

Some TTC 6+ months thread discussion

https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12756439/weekly-randoms-10-5-10-11/p1

I think the reason some of us have a bad taste still about it is because everyone who wanted the thread got pregnant basically immediately after this 

acleverusername

Oh boy. I read through all of that @bows22. That thread was such a gut punch. 

In other news, this happened! 

inthewoods23

@acleverusername welcome to the leader board! 🥳 Haha

acleverusername

anniemarie887

@bows22 feels weird to say, but thanks for sharing. I was glad to read through and get some perspective. I was concerned ma maybe I was doing something wrong or hurtful in re to TFAS. 

bows22

@anniemarie887 I wasn’t sure if I should share since it’s kind of throwing people who are no longer here to defend themselves under the bus, but I figured that was how you were feeling and I just wanted you to have some context. As long as you don’t go around saying you have secondary IF when you don’t meet any definition of that, you’re good haha

optimistgardener

i guess this is only semi-relevant but the discussion in the old randoms thread got me wondering about dailies participation. i rarely join the dailies because my being single/ttc while also being so far down the IF rabbithole that i spend most of my time either benched/on bc/or in the middle of some involved IF treatment makes me feel kind of in a different world from most peoples' experience of conventional ttc wto/tww life. i still lurk the dailies though because i enjoy knowing what people are up to and on occasion figure i have some useful contribution to offer. but reading the old randoms thread made me wonder if i'm doing wrong by not joining in. i hope i haven't inadvertently misstepped. i do think my situation is a little unusual as a single woman on this board, so i really hope people don't mind my perhaps slightly unconventional participation strategies.

keikilove

@acleverusername @inthewoods23 @bows22 Ugh, that whole 6+ Months TTC thread 😬 I finally created the dang thread because there was so much chatter and no action. “Don’t talk about it, Be about it.” 

And then after all the hypotheticals about creating it, no one even posted in it. “No good deed goes unpunished.” What a waste of time& energy. 

keikilove

@optimistgardener I totally get your perspective on the Dailies. It really is up to each person whether to participate or not. Also, this TTGP board was SUPER dead during the first 6-9 months (longer?) of COVID, so we wished people would participate more. 

Plus, if you have limited time it’s very hard to participate in multiple threads frequently. (That’s my issue, so I’ve had to deprioritize the Dailies.)
I think overall it’s good to be active *somewhere* in TTGP so that when you have success and graduate/get to announce in the Grad thread, people actually recognize your name and are genuinely happy for you after getting to know you.☺️ 

bows22

@optimistgardener FWIW I think your participation strategy is perfect. I totally get why you wouldn’t do the dailies, and you provide plenty of support in the threads you do participate in. 

inthewoods23

@optimistgardener plenty of other IFers have stuck to the IF thread. It makes sense since there's nothing really changing day to day. I do recall one time someone posted in the grad thread and I didn't see have a clue who they were. Came to find out they posted only in the TTCAL thread and never participated in any of the GTKY type threads (or even randoms for that matter I guess). I've kind skipped out on the dailies a bunch because it's hard to have something to say every day.

@keikilove you are so right. that killed me that there was all that fuss and then it didn't get used. At that point I think they had all graduated 🙄

paytonpedro

Not to change the subject, but @fantasyflyte regarding pillows for your back- the last 2 nights I’ve wedged just a pretty plump throw pillow in the front of me (by my stomach) when I lay on my side and my back pain was gone. I slept really really great!!! Maybe give that a try until you find a body pillow you like?

anniemarie887

@bows22 i'm not going to lie... i read it at first and really head scratched... and then read it like 3 more times and still felt a bit unrelatable even tho i've been TFAS for 6+ mos and have been "lapped" by people. but anyyyyyway... @keikilove i feel like that's the most "american" behavior let me complain about something but do nothing about it. massive pet peeve of mine. @optimistgardener i am no expert, but i don't think you're doing it wrong! over the summer when i wasn't using OPKs and almost a bit of TTA i wasn't posting a lot! it just didn't feel like i had much to say! i've not been a super consistent participator since feb, and i haven't felt any lack of friendliness as a result. 

fantasyflyte

@paytonpedro interesting, I might have to try that. The last couple nights I've tried wedging an extra bed pillow under/next to my back the first time I wake up in the morning (I usually wake up an hour or two before I need to get up and that's when I notice the pain the most) and so far so good, so I might get away with not spending any extra money.

abjm0325

I'm sitting in my midwife office waiting for some bloodwork and I just heard a guy tell his partner that her getting pregnant was like "pulling a soul in." I'm both fascinated and disturbed by him and I'm now shamelessly eavesdropping the rest of their conversation.

fantasyflyte

in random thoughts, is there a format for a pets thread already? or can we start one (maybe a weekly or monthly thing?) I know several of us have pets and I love seeing them all. and showing off my adorable pup.