The Great Big Questions Thread

chewie5990

@krash_ I haven't really done my own research on this, but my OB from my first pregnancy told me that the safest lunch meat was the processed pre-packaged meat at the store - like oscar meyer over the freshly sliced deli meat. Her reasoning was that often listeria lives on the meat slicers if they aren't properly cleaned. Again..I haven't taken the time to actually look much into it though.. 

runningonindie

Any 3x moms want to weigh in on not being able to remotely relax during first trimester? When I was pregnant with DD I did nothing but “take it easy” and now I am literally lugging 32 pounds everywhere, fighting against terrible 2 tantrums literal kicks and thrashes that I am using my body weight to try and suppress, fighting the nap which is brand new - and my blood pressure likely spiking through the roof from the stress of trying to get her down..... I am feeling like this poor baby inside me is really going through it

cassafrass123

@runningonindie yup...no relaxing whatsoever! It’s a way different experience for sure. Hopefully we’ll all start feeling a bit better in the 2nd trimester!

gutsysneakers

@runningonindie - this was me with my second pregnancy. This time around, the kids are 4 and 6 so this is actually easier for me. My condolences- it’s not easy when the other kid(s) are really young. 

chewie5990

@runningonindie definitely no relaxing over here! My evening are full of light saber duels with my 5 year old while holding my 8 month old, Cooking with the 8 month old strapped to my back, and wrestling the kids to bed. I pretty much pass out as soon as the kids are asleep because the 8 month old is still usually waking up 2-3 times a night. At first I was excited that I won't have to work during my third trimester (summer - I'm a teacher) but then I remember that I will be home with the hooligans all day and I'm not sure which one will be more exhausting.

runningonindie

@cassafrass123 ugh! And I feel largely fine in terms of my pregnancy symptoms but I worry that I’m not taking it easy enough. 

@Jcrewgirl85 at least it’s reassuring to know that you got through it unscathed LOL. I’m fine I just worry about this baby. 

emeraldcity1214

@runningonindie Yep, I have 4 running around. My youngest is currently on a nap strike for the 3rd day in a row. I homeschool too so they all stay here everyday all day and I’m responsible for their education. So I get no down time. Plus I thought it was a great idea to add a puppy to our household a few months ago. 🤦🏻‍♀️ He is like 3 toddlers all rolled into one. My house is a disaster and my kids have ran out of underwear so I went and bought new ones yesterday because who knows when I will get everything washed. I am putting out fires from tantrums, replacing all the things the toddler pulls out of the cabinets he has access to, and trying not to vomit when I fix the kids their food. It’s a freaking fairytale over here. 😜

runningonindie

@emeraldcity1214 wowwwwza. Want to take 1 more?? Ha - kidding!!! Sort of.

emeraldcity1214

@runningonindie Eh, 1 more is just one more plate to fix at meal times and 1 more butt to wipe when they potty. 😆 Honestly, adding one more in this chaos would probably go completely unnoticed because there is that much chaos. I’m hoping I can get them all in their nap/quiet time rooms and take a nap myself today. MS hit me like a load of bricks today and I’m struggling. I even caved and ate pizza for lunch. 😫

runningonindie

@emeraldcity1214 good for you!!!!

krash_

2x+ mom's: what did you actually need for second babies? I am planning on getting new nipples and paci's and obviously wipes/diapers and some clothes but was there anything in particular that you needed for a second kid that you didn't already have? 

marymh80

@krash_ I need everything because we *just* finished giving away all our gear 

Thankfully I gave a lot to a coworker whose baby will be 1, so she's getting ready to not need it and has offered it back. 

And I feel like I have a better sense of stuff I won't necessarily need. I'm SO over a bunch of stuff. One kid already takes up so much room! 

chewie5990

@krash_ the only thing I can think of is a double stroller depending on the age of your first kiddo. Possible a second baby carrier (again depending on age..). We updated a few things, like I wanted a different high chair and different diaper bag - but I can't really think of anything else...mine were complete opposite seasons,  so I needed to buy some winter gear. I do feel like I keep DS2 more contained than I did DS1 because the house is more of a mess and I can't always have all my focus on DS2 so I ended up buying a sit-me-up chair thing that I didn't have for DS1. Like @marymh80 said - I mostly got rid of a bunch of newborn crap left over from DS1 that I realized I didn't need.

emeraldcity1214

@krash_ Nothing really 🤷🏻‍♀️ 

whatabout2ndbreakfast

@krash_ the only things we ended up getting were new nipples, pacis, a better carrier and a double stroller. Also I got a changing table because of the room set up. I think I was given an extra chair that we used a little more because we didn’t really have a baby chair the first time

babybelugaco

Sorry I'm just jumping in here. On the medium steak note...the guidelines my OB provides changed since I had my first (July 2019 was my first appointment for reference!) During that pregnancy she had told me I only needed 200 extra calories a day and that meats needed to be well done.
When I went looking for that sheet on their site the other day in regards to what medicine I could take, I noticed it said 300 calories and meat needs to be done to at least medium! I was so excited. Granted I haven't had my first appointment with her this pregnancy (hurry up 22nd!!!) To validate this but man oh man I will be enjoying all the medium steaks I can this go around!

emeraldcity1214

@babybelugaco I actually don’t think you have to add the extra calories until later in the pregnancy. Except if you’re having twins but I don’t know what the recommendations are for that. 

cassafrass123

@krash_ my 2nd was 20 months younger than my first, so the double stroller was huge for us! You might also need a second convertible car seat. My 2nd also turned out to be much pickier about bottles so I found the free samples from creating registries I never told anyone about everywhere I could, and the completion discounts for that matter, to be really helpful!

babybelugaco

@emeraldcity1214 correct, sorry I left that out. They said that doesn't need added until 12w. My doc will probably tell me later than that because of my weight though

sleepydaze

@runningonindie I had a very similar experience with DD my last pregnancy. Unfortunately it could be both the age (DS is now 21 months and tantrums all the time) and the only-child situation; DD and DS now entertain each other a lot but when I only had DD, she was often bored. Something that might buy you some sanity is sensory bins: I dyed rice, dried pasta, and dried beans (I've now added old cheerios and biodegradable packing peanuts) and would give 1 set of those in a bin to DD (and now DS too). They will easily play with them for at least 20 minutes to an hour with cups, spoons, scoops etc while I get work done. It can be messy to clean up after but is mostly just sweeping. 

emeraldcity1214

@babybelugaco Honestly, I just eat until I feel full and try to eat every 3 hours so I don’t get hungry. I have never gone out of my way to purposefully increase my calories during any pregnancy. As long as my body feels satiated and not starving everything should be fine. 

runningonindie

I’m feeling a bit of mom guilt right now and I’m sure it’s mostly my anxiety that’s getting to me but I went to the hair salon today and ask them to use the ammonia free hair dye to touch up my roots, which is safe for pregnancy. I did this during my last pregnancy, and in general I get my hair done every six weeks… But if I’m remembering correctly, last time I waited until my second trimester to go back to the salon. Honestly I know the ammonia free dye is not going to affect the baby, but I think the fact that I had to wear a mask and my sense of smell is already heightened.... it felt like the dye smell was SO strong this time. As I was sitting there I was just freaking out more and more as the minutes passed. My worrying now is too little too late. 

Curious if anyone else has gone to the hair salon during first trimester?

steph-ann

@runningonindie I’m jelly you got your roots done but I totally understand the worry. I’m a freak about that kind of stuff when it comes to what to do/not to do while pregnant. I prob take it too far. I’m excited to hear about the ammonia free hair dye. I’ve never heard of it. I’m sure everything will be fine! I wouldn’t stress too much, although I know it’s hard. I’ve known plenty of girls that get their hair done through pregnancy and also bleach it. I actually had my hair apt in Jan scheduled and that morning I took a test just to make sure I wasn’t pregnant and found out I was. I went ahead and cancelled the appointment. Although my husband and hair dresser were like what!?! Why? Lol My grays are bad!! But I was gonna do roots and balayage that takes 5.5 hours so I didn’t feel comfortable. I don’t have any advice, just wanted to say I hope you don’t worry to much! I’m sure it was just strong smelling because your smell is heightened. 

runningonindie

@steph-ann thanks!! I’m sure it’s ok. Pregnancy safe is pregnancy safe. The mask was just really trapping the smell and it freaked me out. Fortunately it’s super quick in and out to cover the grays. I actually have balayage too and I stopped doing it 6 weeks ago at my last appointment when I knew we were trying to conceive so that it would be an easy transition once I got pregnant. My hairdresser was surprised at how quickly it happened! Lol. I probably should have aired on the side of extreme caution and waited until 2nd trimester but..... here we are. 

krash_

Has anyone else lost weight? I'm only down 5 lbs, and tbh I had some to lose before getting pregnant, but it seems like the nausea and food aversions are getting to me more than I thought. I have my intake appointment this afternoon so I will mention it but I'm not sure if I should be concerned or try to up my calories already. 

emeraldcity1214

@krah_ I lost 10 in the first trimester during a pregnancy where I had horrible MS. I could barely eat anything. My OB never mentioned it. 

whatabout2ndbreakfast

@krash_ I usually lose 5-10 lbs but end up gaining it in the second and third tris. My OB never mentioned it. I’m a little overweight (like 10 lbs over what I “should” be) though so I guess it doesn’t really matter. I had a friend who was skinny, low BMI and had to do shakes and stuff to gain

Aerialmrs

Has anyone felt any flutters yet? @emeraldcity1214 in your previous pregnancies how early have you felt the baby? That part is so fun, I'm looking forward to it again! I keep pausing and paying close attention to see if I can feel anything. Sometimes I feel something and wonder if it's the baby but... I'm also having some slow-moving digestion issues, so most likely it's just that right now!

chewie5990

@Aerialmrs I've felt a lot of gas bubbles but no baby! With my first I didn't feel anything until about 22 weeks and with my 2nd I think it wasn't until around 18 weeks. 

emeraldcity1214

@Aerialmrs I always feel like I start feeling stuff around 9 weeks BUT I also know I’m more focused on that part of my body right now and gas moving feels just like early movement. So until I know for sure, I don’t assume it’s movement. I don’t want to be caressing my belly in awe of movement when it’s actually gas moving through my digestive system. 😆 I can usually feel for sure movement closer to 12 or 13 weeks even with an anterior placenta. With my first it was closer to 20 weeks before I felt anything. 

CanadianGamerMom

@Aerialmrs I haven't,  I typically start feeling random movement around 13ish weeks, and then consistently around 15 weeks. I cannot wait to start feeling that again,  it's my absolute favourite part of pregnancy! 

agea

@krash_ losing weight the trimester isn’t atypical. I lost five with my first. This is the first pregnancy I’ve taken medication. The diclegis is helping me to eat otherwise I’m sure I’d be down too.
@Aerialmrs I’ve never felt movement before 20w but I’ve also had two anterior placentas.
I feel “things” but I know it’s not baby movement.

Aerialmrs

@CanadianGamerMom It really is the best!

runningonindie

I know there’s been talk about constipation - I’d love some input - i haven’t been constipated necessarily because I’m still having at least a bowel movement per day, but my poops are rock hard and I’ve been experiencing blood on the tissue when I wipe. I saw the nurse practitioner today at my OBGYN and she referred me to a surgical rectal oncologist?!?!?! It freaked me out and it seems extremely unnecessary but she said she’s a stickler for this stuff. Anybody experiencing this too? Seems fairly normal to me. 

krash_

@runningonindie I don't have personal experience with it but a good friend experienced all kinds of issues after her first birth and ended up having surgery to correct it. I'm not sure exactly what the problem was but the surgery was so worth it. Did they rule our hemorrhoids or a fissure? 

runningonindie

@krash_ no they did not… In fact, she went so far as to say that’s probably what it is. And I agree. 

emeraldcity1214

@runningonindie That’s a little aggressive for constipation this early in pregnancy. I would definitely get some kind of medication that will soften things up and up your water and fiber intake. 

runningonindie

@emeraldcity1214 that’s exactly how i was feeling... super weird right? I have no aversion to doctors, if anything I do better when I have plenty of doctor appointments and I know I’m in good health - but this just seems excessive to me without trying any OTC remedies. 

emeraldcity1214

@runningonindie All the surgeon is going to do is check you for hemorrhoids and if you have any surgically remove them. Honestly, constipation can lead to hemorrhoids but I don’t think the first step you take (even when you have them) is to go straight to a surgeon. You definitely try to get the constipation under control so you aren’t straining. If you happen to get hemorrhoids I steroid cream does wonders for keeping them under control. I highly recommend going home with a prescription steroid cream after a vaginal delivery. Especially if you have had hemorrhoids during your pregnancy. 

Centralmnmom

@runningonindie a surgical consult seems extreme as a first step.  I would definitely be looking at over the counter options first.