IF Testing & Treatment w/o 8.31

inthewoods23

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have started infertility testing and/or treatments. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on infertility. TTC can be a long journey naturally, then add in the difficulties associated with infertility, and it becomes a whole new ball game. The road to infertility can be lonely, frustrating, and complicated, so let's make this a place where we can vent, ask questions, and support one another. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this as an ongoing conversation. 

Diagnosis (if you've been): 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): 

How are things going?: 

Any questions?:

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet?

gingermama29

Diagnosis (if you've been): PCOS

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): trying naturally

How are things going?: It seems like BCP did its job; I O'd much earlier in this cycle than I have in any cycle since I started tracking/temping over a year ago. I'm hoping, if I'm don't get KU this cycle, that trend continues and I have semi-"normal" length cycles.

On the mental health side, I'm pretty anxious about going back to work tomorrow. We at least have another week before students come back but I'm definitely anxious.

Any questions?: No

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet?
I met Carrie Underwood weeks after she won American Idol. The top 8 or 10 of that season toured as a group and my friends and I waited by their tourbus after the concert. She signed her single for me.
I'd definitely love to meet Lin-Manuel Miranda. He seems so down to earth and genuine. Plus he's a musical genius!  

legallykate

@gingermama29 Yay for earlier than normal O and FX that this is your cycle. Sorry about having to go back to work, I hope they have a lot of protections in place for you. 

@emeraldduchess I didn't have time to participate last week but I saw your update yesterday and just wanted to say how sorry I am. I hope you and YH are able to have a productive follow up with your RE and make a plan to move forward.

Diagnosis (if you've been): AMA/DOR

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO but not really lol

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): FET!

How are things going?: AF surprised me by showing up on Friday (I was expecting yesterday or today) so I had to scramble and get in to the clinic for my U/S and FET protocol consult, but everything looked good and I officially started my protocol. I am taking Estrace orally (which is kicking my ass) and then hopefully starting progestrone suppositories and crinone (no PIO, woohoo) after my lining check on 9/10 and then transfer will likely be 9/16 or 9/17. I feel like I fluctuate every hour between optimism and pessimism about it, but hopefully as it gets closer I can just be zen. 

Any questions?: None I can think of.

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet? I had dinner with Lindsay Lohan at a 10 person birthday party in LA in like 2009, she was still a big tabloid fixture but had kind of fallen from grace at that point and none of us were allowed to have alcoholic drinks on the table in front of her. I went to college with Mark Zuckerberg and lived right above him and also knew Ryan Fitzpatrick in college (an NFL player), and I knew Michael Phelps growing up from swimming circles (and a lot of other less famous Olympic swimmers of that era). I was super starstruck when I lived in LA, but now I can't really think of anyone I would love to meet. The Obamas?

inthewoods23

@gingermama29 I'm glad that BCP was worth it! GL with the school year. I hope take things seriously to keep everyone safe!

Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained, low morph (but we'll see about that)

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): I did my BW on Friday, DH will submit his SA this week so we should have those results sometime next week. Other than that, it's another month of trying naturally. I believe in us!

How are things going?: pretty swell, can't complain (whaaaat??) 

Any questions?: 2 questions - 1) what are you thoughts that my AMH increased from 4.258ng/mL to 5.59ng/mL? I'm so intrigued because it could just be that I'm "extra" fertile (I don't like saying that) or is it an indicator of PCOS? There's no cysts though... curious what she says. I did read that it could just be due to having a large number of follicles (over 30). 2) what is a normal results for thyroid peroxidase (TPO) antibodies? It says 0.65IU/mL but like, I'm reading articles that say under 35 is good so is this super low or something?? I don't know what it all means.

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet?
I had the opportunity to chat with the lead singer of a metal band during a concert, but DH and I had gotten into an argument shortly before so I was being extra difficult so we didn't do that. The only other "celebrity" I've met was the lead singer for Hawthorne Heights at Warped Tour (oh god my teenage emo phase is showing) and got a picture with him.

kpearse99

@gingermama29 That's amazing news!!! I know how frustrated you were with your super long cycles, so thank goodness the BCP seems to have done what it was supposed to do!! GL with going back to school tomorrow!! Thank you for all you do as a teacher

@legallykate OMG what an exciting update from you!!! YAY for officially starting this FET cycle! Woohoo!!!

Diagnosis (if you've been): Secondary Unexplained IF

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): Pretty sure I"m in the TWW now

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): NTNP, PNV and just HIO whenever we want!

How are things going?: Overall pretty good! Just really trying to take life one day at a time. Construction is moving along nicely! The frames for the two additions are built and the frame walls are up, and they are working on the roof section now! It's so fun to see the progress that they make daily, it seems to really be moving now!

I'm a bit frustrated with my hamstring though. I have good days (like today) and some really bad days (like over the weekend) where it even hurts while sleeping. I was all set to call the orthopedic doctor today but it's feeling pretty good now. I guess I'll see how the week goes. I just don't want to lose all the progress I made on strengthening my legs over these last few months!

Any questions?: nope

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet? I used to work at a children's theme park so I got to meet quite a few celebrities and their families!
Lauren Hill, Kobe Bryant, John and Kate + 8, Mark Wahlberg, Jack Hanna (who is SUPER sleezy BTW), The head baker from Ace of Cakes, Chef Robert Irvin (I got to work with him on his TV series, he was the best!)... I know there are others but I'm drawing a blank! I'll come back and edit if I think of the others!

kpearse99

@inthewoods23 Girl, I believe in you guys too!!!! I LOVE that phrase! 

inthewoods23

@legallykate yay FET!! That's coming up so soon! I would have loved to have met Michael Phelps, but now that he's retired from swimming it's like, eh nevermind. That does remind me though that DH knew the Hamm (spelling?) twins from his days doing gymnastics. I think they competed in the 2000s in the Olympics. I don't think they were in the same club or anything, but he probably competed with/against them back then?

gingermama29

@legallykate yay for FET this month!!! Glad things are moving along for you. And wow, you've met a lot of celebrities! I've also met Ryan Fitzpatrick when he played for the Bills. I used to go to training camp and at least one game a year with my dad so I've met a number of football players. 

@inthewoods23 FX for good results! Glad things are going well for you.

@kpearse99 thank you friend 💕. Sorry your hamstring is still giving you trouble. Hopefully that'll stop completely soon.

misshelen86

@gingermama29 Woohoo to O’ing earlier! That must be such a relief for you. It’s definitely nerve-wracking going back to work but I hope you feel comfortable once you get used to all the changes! I was quite anxious when this all started too but I’m getting used to this way of life now.

@legallykate OMG! So excited your FET is coming up so soon! I can relate to the roller coaster of emotions.. hope you find that zen place.

@inthewoods23 I believe in you two! 30 is a LOT of follicles. I learned a lot about PCOS because I was convinced I had it. The “cysts” in PCOS are actually follicles. How were your androgen levels? I think for the TPO antibodies you want the number to be as low as possible.. it just means they didn’t find antibodies!

@kpearse99 Glad you are making progress on the construction. So frustrating about your hamstring though! That sounds awful.

Diagnosis (if you've been): MFI

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): DH is repeating another SA this week and next week is IVF!!!  🎉

How are things going?: Things are going okay. I had a breakdown Saturday night because I just felt so alone. We opened up to some of DH’s family that we are close to about what is going on and they were somewhat supportive but just don’t get it. 2 of them went into some of the people they know who struggled but then just got KU naturally. Ugh. Otherwise, I’m excited to be starting next week! This has been such a long time coming... we’ve had our IVF consents signed since January so we are ready to go!

Any questions?: Nope

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet? I can’t think of any celebs that I’ve met

akoros

Diagnosis (if you've been): AMA, unexplained RPL, Factor V Leiden

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Just OPKs and maybe giving it our first try since **TW** our most recent loss **end TW**

How are things going?: So far so good? I think my first period is over, which is sooner than expected. Going to try tracking ovulation this cycle and see what happens. Kind of nervous about it, but also anxious to get back "on track", so we'll see if we're up for it once it's go time. 

Any questions?: Nope

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet? I met Dainius Zubrus (hockey player) a few times as a kid, he stayed with my relatives when he first came to the U.S. and remained friends with my cousin after he joined the Flyers. My grandmother was in full-on matchmaker mode when he came to our house for Easter, which is humiliating when you're 12. I might have met Eric Lindros and a few others since I know they hung out together, but I didn't really follow hockey and wouldn't have known who I was talking to. 

keikilove

Good morning! I didn’t have time to fully engage in this thread last week, going to try to do better this week by getting an early start! 

@gingermama29 Yay for early O! FX that your body keeps it up in future cycles. But FX harder that the TWW is a success & you don’t have to track O for a very long time! Sorry about the anxiety about school starting. That’s totally understandable. Hang in there & keep taking care of yourself💓

@legallykate Woohoo for FET prep—sooo exciting! You are SO lucky with the crinone! Does insurance pay for that? What is the estrace doing to you? I don’t notice side effects on it. Also, I feel like I learned so much about you from the Celebrity question.😄

@inthewoods23 Somebody’s feeling good today!😃 Love your positive outlook on the current sitch. Hope the tests results all come back asap & you get some additional insight. Sorry, I don’t know about antibody numbers. But if a person has anti-thyroid antibodies I believe that means their body has launched an attack on the thyroid & they likely need Levothyroxine/ Synthroid. Don’t let me scare you! Find out what that result means first! 

@kpearse99 So sorry about your leg pain! Maybe a silly question, but are you sure it isn’t sciatica? That would be so much better than a tendon or ligament issue! Glad your construction is coming along. Fun to hear about your celebrity friends-except Jack Hanna. Gross! 

@kiki047 I missed the tag last week where you mentioned PUO. Two quick tips: #1: After you draw up the PIO into the syringe, warm it up by sitting it inside a plastic bag inside a large glass of hot water. Or fill a hot water bottle (heating pad) halfway full of water, and fold it in half over the syringe when it’s full of PIO. Let it sit for a couple minutes before injecting. This warms it up & leaves less knots & bruising under the skin. Use the hot water bottle after to heat & massage & prevent knots. #2: You can order the smaller needles from your pharmacy or Amazon, I think. I would do that if I were you! Although if that’s not an option I will say that 

Diagnosis (if you've been): RPL, Elevated NK Cell count & activity (mostly resolved), blood-clotting disorders, AMA, DOR 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFER! 

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Starting stims today! including human growth hormone. 

How are things going?: Great....now! I spent the evening listening to fertility mantras on youtube & reading a new fertility book. This was to raise my energy after a bummer of a weekend: I started suppression meds & told DH that I want ZERO negativity now that we’ve finally made it to this stage of IVF. I told him not to start any small squabbles or bring any negative vibes. Well, I went for a walk & when I came home to make dinner the news was blaring negativity. He wasn’t around so I shut it off. He suddenly ran into the livingroom/open kitchen, visibly upset that I had shut it off; he insisted he was waiting to hear the next story about the political convention. I insisted it’s all negativity to me—as he is well aware—and there are 2 other TVs in the house he could watch that I won’t have to hear. We had a fight, he went into his office where there’s a TV, and then he didn’t even turn on the damn news. This is the dumb sh*te I told him not to start. Sorry, maybe this should go in B*txhfest Monday! 

Any questions?: What was your first U/S like during stimming? How indicative was it of the final retrieval numbers? 

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet?

Too many to remember, honestly. In high school I met Jamie Foxx. As a teenager my bestie & I ran into Neil Patrick Harris (he’d been famous for ”Doogie Howser” way back) when he was on vacation inHawaii & he hung out with us all night. As an adult I’ve lived in big cities where it’s common to brush elbows with celebs. My sisters & I had many good school friends who went on to play in the NFL, so we got to go to their games & meet their famous friends over the years. Think pool parties in Vegas, etc. Friends w a few NBA players too. I used to bartend at a top night club so I met lots of rappers & celebs there. Back in the day in LA we often went to clubs where Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan would be hanging w our same crowd. In NYC I ran into Cecily Strong from SNL & we had a drink at the bar & took a photo. Oh! I also met Beyoncé’s dad. Does he count?😆 I’ve never been star struck. But I’d LOVE to meet Oprah & have a good long convo w her. 

keikilove

@misshelen86 Im sorry about the insensitive comments and your weekend breakdown.😢 But OMG, it’s time for you to start IVF as well!!! I’m so excited for you! January seems so long ago, doesn’t it? I’m trying to not get ahead of myself, but I get so giddy when I see that some of us have a shot at being in the same BMB! 

@akoros Good luck with tracking and *maybe* getting back on the horse. Totally understandable if you do nothing but track to see how your body is doing as far as getting back to normal. Your “matchmaking at 12” story is too funny. That kind of stuff is the worst at that age! 

kpearse99

@misshelen86 I am so ready for this for you!!!! It's so exciting it's starting next week! I'm sorry you've been feeling alone though but I do think it's good you guys opened up to some close family members. It's so hard when they don't get it though, they try so hard to be supportive with their stories of other people's successes because they just want to give you hope, but they don't realize or understand how it can hurt too.

@keikilove I'm not 100% certain that it's my hamstring but it does feel exactly the same as it did 9 years ago when an MRI confirmed I had a pretty severe tear in the muscle. Since it feels the same as before I don't think it's my sciatica. I am so with you on the negativity front! That's all that the news is! We got rid of live television (we just use all the apps now) a while ago and I am so happy we did! The news is awful!!! I also try staying away from reading my newsfeed on FB because all anyone ever posts is negative stuff or trashing other people or decisions about this and that. I'm so over it!!! I like living in my little bubble of happy thoughts, positivity and where everyone loves everyone haha I love that this is the mental state you want to keep going for your upcoming IVF! PS - you live such a lavish life with all of your celebrity encounters and hang outs!! I need to come hang out with you! haha

bluejeanbabi05

Hey all. I intro'd last Sunday, but I've been lurking while waiting for AF, in case joining TTGP was all my body needed to finally get its shit together. Ha ha funny joke ha ha. I've also been keeping up with this thread for the past two weeks, so I've been rooting for you all from afar. In a completely non-creepy way, I promise. 

@gingermama29 That's great about O'ing earlier. It's so nice when your cycles actually regulate and do "normal" shit (stuff? How do we feel about swearing here?). Metformin did that for me, it was so startling but amazing to be able to predict when I O and get AF. Also, sounds like you're a teacher--my mom and a lot of my friends are as well--definitely thinking of you and sending out good vibes this week preparing and going forward. My mom started with students last week, it's been really hard.

@legallykate (love your username) yay for starting protocol! AF started for me Friday, too, and end of day no less, so +1 on the scrambling this cycle. Fingers crossed for zen-ness.

@inthewoods23 what metal band? I too went through an embarrassing teenage emo phases

@misshelen86 yay IVF soon! Also I have a hard time listening to ppl talk about getting KU naturally, hugs for that. 

@keikilove +1 to needing the positivity from DH. I’m looking for a good podcast to start. 

Diagnosis (if you've been): PCOS/endo/who knows. Past septate uterus I had surgery to correct. 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO day 4

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): IUI. I got AF Friday after our RE’s office was closed, so had to call this am. They got me in for labs/ultrasound, here now sitting in my car waiting for them to call me up. My plan is to do this first IUI unmedicated, but we’ll see what Dr. G says. 

How are things going?: Hmm. I thought okay, but now I’m guessing that’s because I’ve had my head buried in the sand. Now that I’m here again, I feel sick to my stomach anticipating the invasive tests and decisions and hope and disappointment. I hate this shit so much. 

Any questions?: Has anyone done an unmedicated IUI? Do you still trigger? 

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet? Ha. The only “celebrity” I’ve met is Danny from Tila Tequila, she is a friend of a friend and we all had drinks together years ago. 

kpearse99

@bluejeanbabi05 Welcome! I had that same thought when I first joined too haha hopefully your time here is WAY shorter than mine! I hear ya on all the feelings this process brings up. Hang in there and just take it one day at a time.

misshelen86

@keikilove So excited you are going through this with me! Although you might be done stimming by the time I start. Sorry about the fight with your H.. that is beyond frustrating!! I love that you are aiming for zero negativity right now.. sending you all the positive vibes! 

@bluejeanbabi05 Sorry you find yourself in our group.. hope you have a short stay! I did a medicated IUI and didn’t trigger, we just waited until my body O’d naturally and monitored with bloodwork/ultrasounds to make sure the timing was right. I think you can do it either with or without trigger for unmedicated IUI but usually without. 

akoros

@keikilove Haha, other than that it's all boring politicians/politico-types that I hesitate to even say I "met" because usually I don't want to start a convo. Last summer we scared Stephen Miller on our way to dinner. Basically we weren't sure if it was him, and us staring at him with perplexed looks on our faces made him scurry away with his date/girlfriend (news broke about their relationship a couple of weeks later). On the way for our last international vacation (too long ago...darned COVID) I was behind Lamar Alexander on the escalator at Dulles. Him I almost went up to talk to, to beg him to support something work-related, but decided against it. I also met James Park (FitBit CEO) without knowing who he was. I got a panicked call from our administrative assistant that guests needed an escort for a meeting with my boss, but I had no idea what the meeting was about. In the elevator one of them commented on my FitBit and started asking me about it, thank god I had nice things to say. It was only later when I realized that 1) they were from FitBit, and 2) the short guy was the CEO. Bottom-line: yours are so much better!

inthewoods23

@kpearse99 watching progress on construction is so satisfying! Hope you can get your hamstring to cooperate. Nobody likes a bum leg lol

@misshelen86 GL with IVF!! Yay!

@akoros your story with the hockey guys reminds me that my boss has friends who are in the MLB. I like that people for the most part do not flaunt their wealth being pro athletes.

@keikilove I just can't find anything on what a good number is! We'll see. My positivity came crashing down when I got the message that I'm not immune to the measles. UGH. So now we're benched for 2 months while I take care of that. I was expecting to be able to do something for the cycle that would start late September/early October but that's going to get pushed a month since you also have to wait 4 weeks after the 2nd dose before TTC. I didn't really want a summer baby anyway because FUCK it gets hot haha. I totally get the annoyance with YH!! Do they not get what it means to not piss us off??? I mean come on!

@bluejeanbabi05 welcome! The band was Periphery. My music taste has shifted from the more teenage angst stuff to progressive metal. Good luck with your IUI!

ramzlau

Updating for now, back for tags later! 

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW/WFAF?

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): IUI #4, with back to back IUI, gonal f, clomid, ovidrel, progesterone, estrace, vitamin D, PNV, CoQ10, baby aspirin, folate

How are things going?: I tested yesterday 11 DPO, it was negative. Not really sure what to try any more or how much more my body can take with all the meds, keep trying to talk next steps with H, but he is in denial that we are out this cycle and doesn't want to talk until then. Insurance doesn't cover IVF until Nov, and I am not sure how much of it is covered at that point. 

Any questions?: NATM

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet? I have met The Rock and Kim K. Did yoga with Helen Hunt. Probably a handful of other not so famous celebrities. Not sure if there is one that is on my list to meet...

ramzlau

@kpearse99 Does your insurance cover some physical therapy? It might help? It is the only thing keeping my pain at bay right now. 

@bluejeanbabi05 Welcome! The unmedicated IUIs that I have done, we have done ovidrel triggers and progesterone after. I think it depends on what they suspect the issue might be. Mine always gets blamed on egg quality and possibly low progesterone since it is unexplained, so they like to trigger me to keep the eggs from sitting around too long. 

@keikilove Sorry for the fight and the negativity! But you are starting stims! Yay! Hopefully YH gets onboard with the zen month! Keeping everything crossed! 

@akoros The first cycle is always hard for me emotionally, I hope it goes well for you! 

@misshelen86 That response is a pet peeve of mine and I never react well to it. I hope you are able to rally and get yourself into a good headspace before starting IVF next week! 

@inthewoods23 Hope the SA results are good! I love the "I believe in us", I could use some of that belief for us at this point. For your questions, my AMH is similar so I asked me RE about PCOS, she told me even if I have it, it seems I have controlled it mainly with diet, so as long as I am not producing cysts, and I ovulate, then she isn't going to address it. Not sure if that helps you. I don't remember what my TPO is, it used to be high, but now is normal...so no help there. 

@legallykate Are you going to transfer 1 or 2? GL with the estrace, I have been on it for a few weeks now. Blah. Hope you find your zen! 

@gingermama29 I hope this cycle is the one for you! Much love! 

acleverusername

@gingermama29 so happy that bcp seems to have done the trick for you. I am sorry you're feeling so anxious about going back to school; hopefully this week will help you "ease into it"; but you're in a crummy situation and I can't say or do much more than send you virtual strength and support. Also, as @kpearse99 said: thanks for all that you do. ❤️

@legallykate so wonderful that you can do FET this cycle! FX that the drugs don't have too much of an effect on you (well, only the good / desired effects!). Also, your celeb list rocks. 💚

@inthewoods23 hot damn about this new obstacle. 🤯I hope you get some good news this week; hopefully on the topic of YH's SA. For the TPO antibodies question, since I have lots of them (and have been diagnosed Hashimoto's) I can only say: the less antibodies you have, the better. According to https://www.verywellhealth.com/thyroid-antibodies-3231533 "the measured serum level should be less than 9 IU/mL" so basically, I think you're not at risk for developing hypothyrodism. 

@kpearse99 I don't want to read too much into your words, but it sounds like you're doing a bit better after a few rough weeks? It's nice that you have the construction project to keep your mind off things. Hopefully all the right stars will align for you soon. Your celebrity list is also very impressive!

@misshelen86 I am sorry you had such a low point over the weekend *virtual hugs*; I've had a few of those recently as well. Hopefully we can support you in a way that makes the next steps of your journey ever-so-slightly more bearable.

@akoros hoping that you'll have a successful cycle (and beyond). How are you feeling about it? What about YH? Also, lol @ your grandma trying to matchmake you with the hockey bro. 🤣 Hopefully you can laugh about it now. 

@keikilove you are a ray of sunshine and I can't believe YH would pull something like that!!! And not to watch the TV later either! The nerve. Hopefully he can get his act together and be ultra-positive as you take these next steps in your journey. Also, your celeb list is WOW. 😲

@bluejeanbabi05 so sorry that you find yourself here; it sounds like you've gone through a lot. Hopefully you'll gain more clarify soon. You mentioned (in your intro, I think?) that your endo might have returned. Will you be getting that checked out? 

@ramzlau I am sorry about the BFN and that YH doesn't seem to want to accept/engage in discussing next steps. 🙁I am sending you virtual hugs of support, and hopes that you'll gain some clarify (in whatever shape or form it might be) soon. 

acleverusername

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained > aka the label that REs like to stick on when they're done diagnosing because any further diagnosis isn't going to change management. But my ovaries don't work properly, so there's really something off; I'll just never know what it is and I need to make peace w/ it. 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFFTG = waiting for follicles to grow; WTT = waiting to trigger

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Day 4 of Clomid today; ultrasound on Sunday to check how well it worked; IUI whenever it's deemed appropriate. 

How are things going?: I am feeling rather blah. The last couple of months have been all about getting every kind of test to try and figure out what's wrong with me/us, and after all is said and done, my RE's Dx is "unexplained". It's just a really hard thing for me to accept as in (almost) every other aspect of my life, I can identify root cause, and eradicate it for better outcomes. I am not familiar with, nor am I comfortable with this lack of information / control. On Friday, I had a session with a therapist at our RE clinic and, although she can't offer me ongoing support, she's sent me a bunch of psychologists / psychiatrists who specialize in (in)fertility. I am hoping to start working with someone who can help me tame my brain.  

Any questions?: I'm all questioned out. 

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet? I don't really get starstruck. I played curling 🥌with Archie (Joel Johnstone) from The Marvelous Mrs. Maizel last year; otherwise, I've met a former Canadian Prime Minister (if @kiki047 is around, it was Jean Chretien) and a former leader of an opposition party (once again for kiki's benefits: Jack Layton). I think the only celebrities I'd want to meet are Prince Harry and Meghan Markle; they seem cool and I had a major crush on Prince Harry when he was 12 (and I was 13). 

ETA: IUI this cycle

kpearse99

@ramzlau I'm so sorry about the BFN, hopefully YH being in denial is a sign that there's still a chance for you guys. I was at the same point back in February that you are at now (in regards to not knowing how much more my body could take from the meds and all) That was when we decided to take a much needed break. I think it might be good for you and your body to take a break and to just NTNP until November when your insurance can cover, hopefully a surprising amount of IVF. My insurance does cover physical therapy but I would surly need to see a doctor first before going there. Knock on wood but so far yesterday and today my leg has felt pretty normal... weird!

@acleverusername I am doing pretty well after a rough few weeks. Things are still weighing on my mind, for sure, but I'm not letting it consume me anymore, which is very freeing. And yes, the construction does help keep my mind off of a lot of things, like TTC  I know EXACTLY how you feel about an unexplained diagnosis. I went through all the tests and while I was happy everything was normal and didn't require surgery or anything major it was also a blow to the heart learning that there was "no reason" we shouldn't be KU. I'm sorry you're stuck feeling blah after all of that

kiki047

Whoa this thread is on fire already. I tried lurking yesterday but was swamped with work, and today is looking to be similar so going to have to come back for tags. But first...

@keikilove YAY friend for starting your ER cycle (again)!!! That's SO exciting!! I have such a good feeling about this one. Goodbyyeeee negativity, ain't nobody got time for that. Question for you - do you remember what gauge needle you used for your PIO? Curious if maybe it's because the mixing needle is just smaller already, which is why I don't need to switch it. It looks massive compared to the tiny little needles I used for stims but it's actually only 22g x 1 1/2". 

Diagnosis (if you've been): PCOS, MFI 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): FET! 

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): FET is a week from today!! 

How are things going?: It's sounding like it's probably not going to be my own RE who is doing my transfer again because of timing (if y'all remember what a nightmare that has been) but I think it's ok. I really liked the RE who did the last one, she was very gentle and so encouraging. I'm on day 15 of estrace and I finally feel like maybe I'm less psychotic, but you'd have to ask MH if that's really true). Starting progesterone (suppositories and PIO) on Sunday. My mom got me a pineapple shirt and had a custom pineapple mask made for me for good luck, which is ironic because I'm allergic to pineapple and I had to explain to her why it's lucky, etc etc, but it's adorable and I love it. MH has one too. 

Any questions?: I don't think so! 

GTKY: Have you met any celebrities? If so, who? And if not, who would you like to meet? I met Justin Trudeau at a speaking engagement (we picked him up from the airport) in 2004, long before he was in politics but he was still well known because of his family. It was only a day or two after he got engaged, so we were amongst the first to know before the media caught wind of it. Have met George Takei on a number of occasions and he was nice, but his husband Brad is my favourite. Lawrence Gowan (Styx) is a friend of a friend and is genuinely the nicest guy, and having been to a few of his rehearsals I can safely say he is without a doubt the most talented musician I've ever met. He took requests from the crew during one of his sound checks and it was epic.  David Suzuki was an asshole. So was Steven Page (Barenaked Ladies). 

ramzlau

@acleverusername I feel ya with the unexplained. I hate that is where the diagnosis stops. I love having answers. I hope some therapy can help you reach a place that you can have some peace about it. 

@kpearse99 Yay for the hamstring feeling better today! I was hoping the same about maybe MH being right, but tested this morning and it was negative again. Blah. The hardest part is how hard a failed cycle disappoints him. 

@kiki047 one week! Love that your mom did the pineapple stuff for you! So hopeful for! 

akoros

@ramzlau @acleverusername Thank you! Feeling ok about it, kind of nervous but also definitely want to try. Haven't talked about it in a couple of weeks, but my husband is fine with trying again now as well. We talked about waiting, but agree that it won't reduce our anxiety and could actually increase it as I get increasingly nervous about my age (yes, I realize that 3 months won't make a difference on that front, but still).

Haha, I definitely laugh about my grandmother's matchmaking now. Any time she saw a "nice Ukrainian boy" she went for it, either for me or for my older cousin (depended on the age of the guy). It got worse in high school and college when two of my cousins married brothers and their youngest brother was close to my age, there were several years there with gentle prodding on both sides for us to get together (spoiler alert: we didn't, though we remain close with that family). 

@acleverusername Totally feel you on struggling with the "unexplained" diagnosis. Even though my MFM said that she doesn't think the clotting disorder they found caused the miscarriage, I'm just telling myself that it did for my own sanity. I hope you find a good psychologist who can help you work through it.

Had a crazy, somewhat upsetting, dream last night. I think it has to do with TTC nerves. *TW* Previous pregnancy/loss mentioned:

Started out good, I was visiting my parents and for whatever reason was stopping by their neighbor's house to pick up my stuff. Made sense in Dreamworld, though there's no real reason why I'd have things there. That said, they are my age with young twins and had offered me a bunch of baby stuff a few months ago (crib, stroller, high chair, pack'n'play, etc, they have two of everything), so maybe that's why. While getting my things I heard some friends of theirs come by, who turned out to be my friends who I haven't seen in a while due to COVID. Of course, that friend was pregnant again (in the dream, not IRL....that I know of). They were coming over to swim with their toddler daughter, which I realized meant they were coming to my parents' house (they let the neighbors use their pool whenever they want). I told them I'd meet them there, and as I was finishing up grabbing stuff my sister-in-law came by, as they'd also been invited to use the pool with their two kids. So, lots of kids and friends and my parents' house, it was a party. At some point the issue of pregnancy came up with some guys I didn't know well (in the dream, that is, never seen them before) and I blurted out that I lost two pregnancies and wound up going all into it. They had this look of utter horror, pity, and disgust on their faces. I can't remember what else happened, but then I woke up. Great way to start the day...

bluejeanbabi05

@ramzlau I'm so sorry for the neg hpt. What's with the insurance Nov requirement? Do you have to go through a certain number of IUIs first? Also thanks for sharing your IUI trigger experience (same to @misshelen86). My RE is having me trigger, but no progesterone. 

@acleverusername no to the endo question; it's hard for them to non-invasively know what the endo situation is. They discovered it by accident last time because I had an unrelated surgery on my uterus. They burned it all away, but that was several years ago. Are you doing an IUI as well? I can very much relate to the "unexplained" diagnosis. There's a bunch of labels that may or may not fit me, but they don't really know with me, either. And I'm a control freak, so the not knowing and not being able to fix it makes me crazy. I like to make lists of lists I need to make. I don't like things that are un-listable. All that to say, fx the clomid is working its magic on you!

kpearse99

@kiki047 I love all the pineapple stuff your mom has gotten you! How cute and super thoughtful!! So much love  

ramzlau

@bluejeanbabi05 NY state passed a law in 2019 that by end of 2020 all insurance plans that are underwritten in NY have to cover IVF! Although I am not in NY, that is where our insurance is underwritten and our plans renew in Nov, so the new law goes into effect. 

acleverusername

Thanks, everyone, for commiserating with me regarding the "unexplained" diagnosis. 🤗

@kiki047 what is the significance of the pineapple🍍?

@bluejeanbabi05 yes, doing IUI too; edited my status. I don't have any experience with it personally, but I do know endo is so hard to diagnose/treat. I am sorry you're going through this. I hope a path forward clarifies itself soon. FX.

@akoros Right? I just need something to cling on to... even if nothing can be done about it. Anyway, let's see what therapy can do for me.

acleverusername

Hmmmm - question on IUI: is it normal to only have an ultrasound ~ Day 11, and not a blood test, when doing Clomid/Letrazole?

ramzlau

@acleverusername I don’t do labs that late in the cycle unless I had them done on CD3 for a baseline to compare too. So some cycles they skip labs altogether if I couldn’t make it in on CD3. 

bluejeanbabi05

@ramzlau that is fucking amazing! I'm also extremely fortunate to work for a company based in a state with the same law--Illinois--even though I live in Florida. It is pretty messed up, though, that access to affordable reproductive treatments can come down to something as arbitrary as where your company is headquartered.

inthewoods23

@acleverusername thanks for the TPO info! I also really despise the "unexplained" label. My new RE said tests, etc could just be not sensitive enough or blah blah blah and that's why you can't always pinpoint what's wrong. It's really not that comforting. And it's basically the reason I wanted a 2nd opinion! I don't think they did labs later I'm the cycle for my IUIs either.

@kiki047 aaahhh the FET is so close!! I love that your mom got you the pineapple shirt and mask. So awesome!

legallykate

Wow this thread is busy, I love how much support there is here but it also makes me so sad there are so many of us fighting this battle. Big Hump Day hugs ladies. 

@inthewoods23 Hope you continue to get good test results but even more so that this is your cycle so none of it matters anyway!

@kpearse99 So exciting that the construction is moving along so quickly, that never seems to be the case. I hope your hamstring lets up on you, that sounds so frustrating. Love your list of celebs!

@misshelen86 Yay for getting started with IVF. Sorry that YH’s family doesn’t totally get it, I think most people who haven’t personally experienced it really can’t relate and don’t know what to say.

@akoros So sorry about your recent loss and the awful dream. I wouldn’t rush into trying again until you are sure you are ready. Take whatever time you need.

@keikilove Yayayay for your upcoming ER. I love your focus on positivity, there is way too much negativity everywhere right now and it is so hard to avoid, so good for you for proactively doing so. And I love that you used to party with all the celebs! The Estrace just seems to make me super sleepy and lethargic and kind of dizzy for some reason, I have been sleeping like 9 hours a night and still feel tired – either that or my body is just finally catching up to not getting enough sleep all spring/summer.

@bluejeanbabi05 Everything crossed for your IUI!

@ramzlau I’m so sorry about the BFN. I hope your insurance coverage is good for IVF or even better that you won’t need it because you will be KU before then.

@acleverusername Sorry you are struggling with the “unexplained” label. I can see why that would be super frustrating since I always want to “fix” things, and it sucks when there is nothing obvious to fix. I really hope this IUI cycle is the one!

@kiki047 Eeek your FET is so soon, so exciting! Love all the pineapple stuff, I bought myself a lucky pineapple shirt too. Keeping everything crossed for you for next week.

inthewoods23

DH's sample was dropped off this morning for the SA  He said it was MUCH easier to do at home than at a clinic. Results will be in 5-7 days so hopefully we hear back in 5! I need to message them and ask when we can schedule the follow up "what are we going to do" appointment. I feel like we won't be able to until they get the results, but I want to ask anyway. Of course I'll be checking DH's account in the portal every day to see if the results come in 

acleverusername

@inthewoods23 I have such mixed feelings about guys' testing: on the one hand, we (women) go through so much more in this journey. On the other hand, having to "provide a sample" in an office / office bathroom somehow seems more vulnerable. I don't know if it's because we're de-sensitized via annual PAP tests over the years. Anyway, hoping YH's swimmers have turned into Michael Phelps's. 

inthewoods23

@acleverusername right, the guys don't have to get poked and prodded so much like we do. They just do a very natural bodily thing. I know it's hard on DH as he's one of those who isn't super comfortable with himself naked (even around me) or into self-pleasure so the idea of providing a sample fills him with a bit of dread. And yeah, the whole doing it in a completely unknown place I can understand. I mean I get anxious just going to a new place for the doctor! My OB does work in a couple different locations so the first time I saw him at a location I had never been too I was a little panicky about getting to my appointment on time knowing I was going somewhere I had never been too.

I am definitely not one of those to enjoy travel on my own to unknown places. I'd rather have someone along with me lol.

legallykate

@acleverusername @inthewoods23 MH was so upset when I told him he would have to give another sample the morning of my ER, he thought they had like saved his sample from his SA and were just going to use that    I felt kind of bad for the confusion, and I am sure having to walk with a nurse to a room to do that is awkward AF, but at the same time I was like dude I am going under anesthesia to have my eggs sucked out through my vaginal wall after stabbing myself in the stomach with needles multiple times a day for weeks, you will survive. 

ramzlau

So we are moving forward with IVF for November. Our RE has recommended we set up appointments with Urologist, Acupuncturist and Nutritionist to improve the chances of a positive outcome. I know some of you have mentioned going to acupuncture, anything specific I should be looking for or asking? Same with nutritionist? 

misshelen86

@ramzlau Sorry you are moving ahead with IVF now.. I was really hoping that your IUI would be a success. Sending you hugs That sounds like a good idea to get everything optimized in preparation. I go to acupuncture.. I just googled until I found someone I thought I would like. What intrigued me is that he specializes in fertility and is also an MD. He has a great personality too, which is so important.. you want someone you feel comfortable with. I recommend bringing something to listen to during your session.. I have a hard time just relaxing, so I put a meditation on my phone to listen to.