MH and I decided that we are going to move forward with hiring a doula!!
Due to covid, they will obviously be digital services. But I'm actually very excited! I told my Dr. at my last appointment that I was interested in a natural birth and she gave me the card of a doula she has had great experiences working with. I already feel less fearful about birth and I haven't even called her yet 😊.
@gh1219 That’s awesome! And great that your doctor had a recommendation. I’m really thinking about getting one but am nervous they wouldn’t be allowed in the delivery room if they’re still limiting visitors. Anyone know if that would apply to doulas too?
@laurenspdx in the hospital where I'll deliver (and where I work), doulas are considered visitors. They don't have any affiliation with the hospital. Since the hospital policy is one visitor per laboring mother, the doula will not be able to come. I don't mind having the digital only conferencing and I will feel safer that way anyway even if they change the policy before delivery. Each hospital will have its own visitor policy so I would check that!
Can I be honest with you all here?? Lately I have been feeling kinda guilty posting in any of the threads as i feel like in the long run soon im not going to be here anyways because of everything I'm going through from my NIPT 😥🥺 I feel like I'm just wasting time and going through the motions waiting for my next test to be done and to come back postive again and then be terminating the pregnancy, so I feel almost like a phony when I know my baby won't be here in the end. 💔 I'm sorry, I dont mean to be a downer but I just needed to get that off my chest.
@mindyb2019 you are not a phony! Please post with us as long as you feel like.
I have such a stressful week ahead of me and I have no idea where to get started. First of all, I’m entering week 3 of summer session for my college class. I have a paper to prepare and I’m stuck on a topic. Second, my husband just left for a business trip and will not be back until Friday. I am in a time crunch to get the house presentable to get photos taken by Wednesday so we can list by the end of the week. Oh, did I mention I’m also glued to my work computer all day long? Oh, and I literally forgot the biggest thing: I have an appointment with MFM tomorrow to check baby’s heart. Literally the biggest thing and furthest from my mind 😩.
@tryingktogku I have no idea when my next test is. I'm still waiting for the genetics team at the women's hospital to give me a call to go over my options and schedule my next test. Whenever that may be. Could be in 3 weeks or more from now I guess it all depends when they can fit me in and how busy they are. I hope its sooner then later. My Dr put in a referral to them a couple days ago on an urgent matter so we will see.
@mindyb2019 I found a 4 leaf clover in front of my house today and thought of you!
TTC History:
Me: 36 H: 40 Married 2015. Together since 2010. TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017 BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018. TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020 Due date was Nov 2020 DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma. TTC: March 2021 IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022 IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
@mindyb2019 You’re not a phony! What you’re going through is very real and the connections that come from these boards is probably more important than ever. Keep posting if that feels right and if it’s what you need!
@mindyb2019 you’re definitely not a phony! Don’t feel guilty for posting - the randoms thread is a great place to keep all of us updated, ask questions and get support.
@mindyb2019 You are so not a phony, please keep posting as much as you need! I relied on my previous BMB group heavily when I was dealing with my genetic testing and decision to terminate last fall. I'm so sorry you're going through this. If you'd like to talk privately I'm here for you.
@mindyb2019 please don’t feel that way! Truly none of us KNOW these are our take home babies, and we absolutely want to be here to support you as long as it isn’t painful for you.
I am sending strength and hope this turns out to be a scary fluke.
@laurenspdx as a follow up for the doula question, my friend who is expecting in Nov said that both the hospitals she looked at (one in PA one in NY) allow both a doula and the one visitor, which I thought was awesome. Obviously people here in TX are behind in the times!
Just got off the phone with MFM. I’m switching to insulin because it’s better for the baby because it doesn’t affect her like Metformin or Glyburide would. What scares me the most is she said I have to have an ultrasound at 16 weeks for early fetal anatomy scan, 20 weeks and 24 weeks because they have to check her heart and brain for abnormalities that can be caused by diabetes. I didn’t have any of those extra scans with with DS.
@jbal918 same! The only extra ultrasound I got with DD was the fetal echo and this time I'm having the same as you. They didn't really say why when I questioned it other that that was their standard protocols for diabetic moms. I'm also recently put on insulin but they kept me on metformin. Of course all of this made my anxious mom brain go into overdrive. 🤦♀️
@mindyb2019 you are more than welcome here! If I were you I’d still be posting! We all need and deserve support from each other ❤️❤️ Please stick around!
@gh1219@laurenspdx we hired a doula already and we know that we might end up only getting access to her via FaceTime during delivery. BUT some of the hospitals in FL are allowing doulas to come in with partners, but no other visitors. I’m hoping that our hospital, which is a women’s hospital with an entire wing dedicated to L+D, will listen to their patients and be more flexible by December. We are also getting pre-delivery private birth classes, and post-natal lactation support from our doula, I feel like it’s all worth it even if she’s just on call on delivery day. I’m not one that wants a natural birth per se, but I want to try to do things for as long as possible unmedicated, and if I can go all the way all the better.
Also I heard from a friend that while the doula is there for you, they end up being a huge support system for the husbands/partners who really just don’t know what their role should be except to sit around and wait.
I love all this talk of doulas already! It makes me feel like I need to get going! I had a doula with my first birth and am planning on having one again but have not connected with one yet.
Ok update: Got a call today from my Dr and I have a phone consultation this Weds morning at 11am to speak with the genetics specialist at the Womens Hospital in my area. She will discuss with me all my options and questions I have and go over it all, then I can book a test directly with them to have done. I hope I won't have to wait too long to have additional testing done. We will see I guess what she has to say.
@mindyb2019 yay! Glad your Dr connected you with a Specialist. I can't wait for you to talk with them to plan out your next steps!
TTC History:
Me: 36 H: 40 Married 2015. Together since 2010. TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017 BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018. TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020 Due date was Nov 2020 DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma. TTC: March 2021 IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022 IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
I did a car seat consult with this woman who runs an Instagram account called Safe in the Seat. She is close to me in FL but was recommended by a few friends. I thought she was great. I’m a FTM and totally lost with car seats. She gathered A LOT of details about us, our cars, the stroller we want, what’s important to us, our lifestyles and promises to make recommendations of 1-3 car seats that fit our budget. Should receive them by Friday! Really interested to see what she sends our way.
*TW* death of a family member* My BIL passed away this week. He had been battling cancer for a while now and we knew he didnt have a lot of time left but it still sucks. My FIL is not handling it well and he is 82 and not in good health so we are also worried about him too. *end tw*
I feel bad because my SO siblings are coming in from out of state and they all want to see the kids but with all the Covid stuff going on I'm worried about having them around all these people. I'm also worried about my FIL being around all these people as well. My SO thinks I'm overreacting.
@nmadjeski I’m so sorry for your loss. What a tough time to be going through this! I think your concerns are totally valid, though, even though it’s an emotional time.
My take has been - I can’t stop or prevent other adults from making decisions that are risky, but I can place limits on the risks we take as a family living under 1 roof. Ex: my dad is on a golf trip with his buddies this week, so I said we’ll wait to celebrate Father’s Day until 2 weeks after you get back.
If we must be around anyone who isn’t social distancing we’re either in masks, or we sit apart outside. My H thinks I’m being overly cautious, but he acknowledged that it’s ultimately the right thing to do.
@nmadjeski I am so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and your family this week.
For the record, I don’t think that it’s overreacting to worry about your family and try to keep them safe. I agree with @shelmcclel that if you can, try to spend as much time as possible outside with distance between you, or at least wear masks.
Update: Ok.. I spoke with the genetics specialist at the womens hospital today and this is what she said and where I'm at. She went over my test results and explained it and said that there is margin for error from them and the NIPT results arnt always accurate based off of certain things and asked me some questions about my family history and my husbands and if we know someone or someone In our family has ever been born with a hole in there heart or mental disabilities or anything like that and I said no cause everyone is totally fine. She said based off of that and off of my test results she said she would say that I have an 85 percent chance that the test was a true positive and a 15 percent that it's a false positive. Sigh 😔 I dont have much hope. So long story short, she recommended doing the Amnio and I can have it done by 15 weeks which is in 2 weeks for me. I could of had the Amnio early at 14 weeks along but she said that comes with higher risks of other things which I'm not really comfortable with so I'll wait just an extra week. I have an appointment booked for July 2nd around 2:30pm. The results will take 2-3 days to come she said and then we will know for sure. I'm scared and sad but happy that I have an appt booked so that i will have answers soon good or bad. I'm expecting the worst with the results from the Amnio but of course always hoping for the miracle ending. I'm really NOT looking forward to being poked and prodded. 😖 Please pray for me and my baby and think positive thoughts for me. ❤
@shelmcclel@readermom1 thanks you both! We ended up leaving the kids with my mom (we live together, so no worries there) and went and visited. We decided to take the kids to see his dad tomorrow when there wont be as many visitors. I'm so worried about his dad getting sick but you are right and the actions of others can not be controlled. I feel better knowing I'm not alone in thinking taking precautions is still necessary.
@mindyb2019 thank you! And I am so glad you were able to get that scheduled. You and baby will be in my prayers!
Me: 36 H: 40 Married 2015. Together since 2010. TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017 BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018. TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020 Due date was Nov 2020 DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma. TTC: March 2021 IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022 IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
@mindyb2019 I'm glad you spoke to the specialist. I was right where you are not that long ago, and found our genetics counselor to be very informative (as you know). Whatever happens you'll get through this, take care of yourself and your husband.
Sorry for the double post but I hit reply before I was done.
I’ve been so MIA around here. I got a new job so I’m stressed about changing jobs while pregnant, plus telling everyone I’m leaving and telling the families I work with that I’m leaving, finishing up work projects, and my son turned 1. It’s been busy around here. I hope to be around more often!
jbal918
member
Re: 6/14 - 6/20 Weekly Randoms
Due to covid, they will obviously be digital services. But I'm actually very excited! I told my Dr. at my last appointment that I was interested in a natural birth and she gave me the card of a doula she has had great experiences working with. I already feel less fearful about birth and I haven't even called her yet 😊.
TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017
BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018.
TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020
Due date was Nov 2020
DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma.
TTC: March 2021
IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN
IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022
IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN
IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN
AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
@bearmomma1 awww yesss lol thank you. See it's a good sign.. You found one too. Maybe all these clovers is a sign for something good to come 🙂
Just got off the phone with MFM. I’m switching to insulin because it’s better for the baby because it doesn’t affect her like Metformin or Glyburide would. What scares me the most is she said I have to have an ultrasound at 16 weeks for early fetal anatomy scan, 20 weeks and 24 weeks because they have to check her heart and brain for abnormalities that can be caused by diabetes. I didn’t have any of those extra scans with with DS.
@gh1219 @laurenspdx we hired a doula already and we know that we might end up only getting access to her via FaceTime during delivery. BUT some of the hospitals in FL are allowing doulas to come in with partners, but no other visitors. I’m hoping that our hospital, which is a women’s hospital with an entire wing dedicated to L+D, will listen to their patients and be more flexible by December. We are also getting pre-delivery private birth classes, and post-natal lactation support from our doula, I feel like it’s all worth it even if she’s just on call on delivery day. I’m not one that wants a natural birth per se, but I want to try to do things for as long as possible unmedicated, and if I can go all the way all the better.
TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017
BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018.
TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020
Due date was Nov 2020
DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma.
TTC: March 2021
IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN
IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022
IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN
IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN
AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
*TW* death of a family member*
My BIL passed away this week. He had been battling cancer for a while now and we knew he didnt have a lot of time left but it still sucks. My FIL is not handling it well and he is 82 and not in good health so we are also worried about him too.
*end tw*
I feel bad because my SO siblings are coming in from out of state and they all want to see the kids but with all the Covid stuff going on I'm worried about having them around all these people. I'm also worried about my FIL being around all these people as well. My SO thinks I'm overreacting.
@mindyb2019 thank you! And I am so glad you were able to get that scheduled. You and baby will be in my prayers!
TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017
BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018.
TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020
Due date was Nov 2020
DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma.
TTC: March 2021
IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN
IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022
IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN
IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN
AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.