Weekly Randoms w/o January 27

blackgirlmagic

blackgirlmagic

I’m not sure if this picture has been used yet, but oh well. I’m telling my boss on Tuesday that I’m pregnant. I’ll be 13+2 then. I love my little bump, but I’m sure people will think I’m “huge” being so early. I’m a little self conscious about it because I know I’m on the heavier side for my height. But I’m still doing my best to be confident until this belly has completely rounded out. I haven’t been physically into work in two weeks so I’m sure people will be shocked to how much I have popped since I’ve left work. 

WishesSheCouldCook

@blackgirlmagic good luck with your boss! We still haven’t told the ILs yet and we live next door. I haven’t seen them in a few weeks though- they’ve had the flu. I’m pretty sure they’ll be shocked at how big I am. 
if I haven’t heard from my OBs office by lunch I’ll be crazy lady calling to ask for my NIPT Results. 

[Deleted User]

I had my hand forced and had to tell my boss last week, even though I was only 10 weeks as we havent told the ILs either, since I heard it through the grapevine that Congratulations were in order. 🤦 She claims she just "knew" i.e. women's intuition, but I really think she just didn't want to throw the other pregnant girl under the bus, who I suspect told her about both of us.

Ffwd to me, hitting snooze for no less than an hour and a half, and I still didn't have her lunch packed (because we ran the over to clean last night). FML, seriously. Lol. I can't keep doing this... 😓

lachnessmomster

Losing my mind over here already this morning. DS has been up for an hour and a half and has spent the majority of that time throwing fits, being disobedient, and being mean to DD. I'm so tired of the fighting and the drama. Can I just gulp down a cup of coffee before all of the chaos starts? My goodness.

wildrainbow

It's been crazy over here too. I'm already exhausted. I have to lug both kids grocery shopping today and with how crazy they've already been this morning, it's bound to be a trip where I'm the mom in the aisle with screaming kids. 🤦‍♀️

RedBaramid

My bladder had me up and down like, 5 times last night and I'm tired as heck from that.  Then one of my cats decided that 6:00am was a good time to lay across my face.  We started prepping DD last night that her job today was to clean her room... lo and behold it is 11:30 and she is STILL fighting me on it. I've turned off all cartoons and taken all electronic toys. Is she 5 or 15? I can't tell. 

What makes me most mad is we were going to go out for dinner to one of her favorite places after karate class tonight(it happens to have something mommy's been craving.. but you know...), but if she doesn't do her chores we can't let that happen and I've been eating like an angel all day so I can eat whatever I want at dinner.  Please child, just clean your room. 

roo_baby

I've been having crazy dreams/nightmares about the NIPT results since I'm so anxious to get them back. Then this morning I had an email from my Dr!! Surprise, it's not the results. She was responding to my request for Zofran. But she only gave me 4 mg and I normally take 8 mg, so I asked her if she could change that and btw are my NIPT results back in yet? So now I'm waiting for a response again.

Anyone else on zofran taking less than 8 mg? Does it do anything? I feel like I only get mild relief as is, I can't imagine half as much will really help.

smsaulino

I wasn't on here at all last week due to TB app issues on my end and also because I was very sick and exhausted. Still feeling the same way but it was worse last week with DD cutting three teeth, including a molar and canine, and two more trying to pop. So she was worse than normal.

I feel bad this morning also because I accidentally took Ibuprofen instead of Tylenol. I know it's a major no-no. I don't need a lecture. I tried to throw it up right after I took and couldn't. I called my ob right after and she said it's more of a concern if it's taken daily. She said this early it could result in miscarriage, the 2nd trimester it is a greater risk for baby to develop cleft palate and in third trimester, heart problems. 

lachnessmomster

@wildrainbow Is it a full moon tonight? What is going on!? DS just did two kids yoga videos (one of which I did with him), which tuckered him right out, but he STILL threw a massive tantrum and screamed at me when I said it was nap time, even though I warned him well ahead of time that he could do one more video, then nap. MAN.

@RedBaramid When I'm looking forward to a special meal and then that meal does not come to fruition, I'm ready to fight someone. For your sake, that girl better shake a tail feather and clean that room! 

@smsaulino Girl, I don't think anyone is going to lecture you. It happens and was an honest mistake. As your OB said, if you were taking ibuprofen regularly, that might be a different story. It sounds to me, though, that she's not extremely concerned and was giving you the risks of habitual use just so you're aware in the future. Try to not to beat yourself up over it. You're human.

tyrion_

I’ve been spotty on here because I was having the same app issues as @smsaulino. So annoying. 

Hoping it calms down this week. 

Just over here, passing time to get to the second trimester and get NIPT results. 

samsonator

Is anyone else dreading telling work? I'm looking forward to it in regards to figuring maternity leave and daycare out, I just hate all the attention it brings. I hate when attention is on me. All the "congrats", "when are you due", "how are you feeling" stuff makes me uncomfortable. So that's the level of social anxiety I have I guess 😅 I'm really really dreading our monthly staff meetings because I fear someone is going to say "And S is pregnant!" during the congrats part of the meeting. 40 sets of eyes on me, no thanks..

WishesSheCouldCook

@roo_baby hope you hear back soon! 

@smsaulino I’m sure everything is ok! Sorry for the extra stress!! 

I called around lunch time and talked to the nicest nurse. NIPT came back clear and it’s a girl. We told our 4 yo dd this evening. She’s so excited!

riatortillaxo

@samsonator I agree that I hate the attention but I would like to be able to explain why I've been moody and constantly trying not to throw up. Hahahaha 
I hope no one calls you out at the staff meeting!  

[Deleted User]

How scary! @smsaulino I'm glad your doctor wasn't too concerned, since it was just the one time.  Please don't stress! (((Hugs)))

@WishesSheCouldCook Congratulations on a healthy baby, and Team Pink! 💖💖

babytimeagain

@WishesSheCouldCook wonderful news! Two girls are going to be SO much fun! Congratulations! 

gomillis

I think there must be something in the air affecting our kids, because my son has been extremely difficult the past couple of days too. Tonight DH has to work late so I was on my own with DS, who thought it was hilarious to throw pasta on the floor after demanding I take all of the olives out. 

I’ve also been having app issues. It doesn’t load any threads. I’ve been using the mobile website but even with that, it will only halfway load the pages, then I have to kill the page and somehow it loads. Clearly I’m very dedicated to this group because I’m putting up with this nonsense! 

gomillis

@WishesSheCouldCook Congrats on your baby girl! And hooray for healthy results! 

blackgirlmagic

@samsonator I’m not looking forward to the attention either. I’m sure my boss will ask if she can put it in our hot topic for the week, I will say yes, and that’s how my director will find out. I’m looking forward to telling a couple people at work, but not everyone. 

Also, I’m really proud of myself for showing up to work everyday of my pregnancy during the first tri. With my first pregnancy I was late a lot and my then boss was like, “I already knew, you’re  never late. 

roo_baby

@samsonator I'm dreading telling work because even though it's a family-friendly company with lots of flexibility, I know it will affect the opportunities I have. I don't really mind the attention, but I don't want every conversation to be about the baby rather than my projects and accomplishments. I think I probably have about 2 more weeks before it's obvious and I'm savoring that time as much as possible. 

laur84ns

Add me to the list of people who are dreading telling work! I’m in Canada so I am still on my year long mat leave with my 10 month old. I go back to work at the beginning of March, and I know they’re all looking forward to having me back and having a another body to share the work load..., and then I’ll be telling them I’m 15 weeks pregnant and only back for 5-5.5 months. Yikes. My friends/coworkers will be surprised but happy for me I’m sure, but my supervisor and bosses.... eeek. 

@gomillis I’m having the same issue with the website (not the app) - whenever I click on a thread it half loads so I have to click the x at the top of the page to “stop it from loading” which makes the whole thread finally appear. So strange. Oh well. 

lachnessmomster

@gomillis I reached out to The Bump regarding some app issues I was having, and their response (though very friendly) was essentially to log out/log back in and turn wifi off/back on. It didn't fix anything, so they gave up troubleshooting. Lol. I was like, thanks a heap, guys.

gomillis

@lachnessmomster Well, at least you tried. Clearly there’s some sort of bug affecting the site. 

kgrgreen

I told my boss earlier than I planned (11+5) because she started talking about 2020 goals. She wanted me to take on a new project and I guess my face said it all. She asked "Why do you look so scared?" And I felt like I didn't have an option in that moment so I told her. She was actually really great about it but I didn't want her to think I wasn't excited about the project and leave her high-and-dry.

@samsonator I'm not excited about telling the rest of the people I work with because people can't keep their hands or comments to themselves  With DH, I had incessant belly-touchers and the comments of "Oooooh, you're so big already! Can't believe you're not ready to pop yet". Not looking forward to that again.

tara4910

Add me to the not-excited-to-tell-work list. I already told one co-worker who I consider my friend and my boss because of appointments. But I hate the attention of people I’m not as close with asking how I’m feeling and commenting on my body all the time so I’m dreading that part. Also, 3 of my teammates (out of 8) have been pregnant within the last year and all did a cute work announcement and that’s just not my style. 

@kgrgreen I’m cringing at the thought of belly touchers 😭

@lachnessmomster I’m glad you reached out sorry they were less than helpful. I’ve been circumventing the issue by using bump mobile in my browser which is annoying. 

@laur84ns so jealous of your maternity leave! 

radiohd18

@samsonator I am not excited about telling work either. I can't stand nosey questions at work and there are some nosey people near me. Also, I know that my maternity leave will be throwing a wrench into some people's plans but, I keep telling myself that I am not going to plan my family around work. It's impossible to do anyway. And, after all of the struggle to get this far, I am going full steam ahead as long as I can. 

@kgrgreen I am all about the ninja chop to the belly touchers. 

samsonator

Congrats @WishesSheCouldCook !! Two girls will be so much fun

Ugh @kgrgreen I hate belly touches!! And the rude comments.  I hope they're better about it this time around!

@laur84ns I love your maternity leave policy there! I can see how it would be hard to tell them that you're pregnant again though. At least they will have you back for a little bit

@roo_baby That's a bummer that it will affect your opportunities Is it just during your maternity leave or longer term than that?

@blackgirlmagic A newsletter type accouncement might be better than telling everything in person! And that's impressive that you didn't miss any days and arrived on time. I admit I've been late a time or two...

ziggymama06

I am also nervous to tell work.  I work in a four-person (including me) office, so when one person is out, it is really felt.  I have no clue how my maternity leave will be, so excited to figure that out.  My boss is a genuinely nice guy so I'm sure he will work with me.  I may offer to work from home earlier than I would want to come into the office, because I won't be ready to come back after just a few weeks.  Ugh, we will see how this goes.  Waiting a few more weeks until after NIPT results.  I think he has some suspicions as I've had to leave work early a few times for appointments and he said he hopes everything is ok.  I also have a work dinner tonight where everyone will be having wine.  My plan is to say I'm on medication... they don't know why I'm going to the dr, right?!

I want to share an experience that I remembered over the weekend for all the mamas who think their bump is giving them away at the office... nearly ten years ago when I was working at a much larger firm, I was in the restroom washing my hands when a coworker came out and began washing her hands.  We were friendly, but not close by any stretch.  She out of nowhere tells me that she is pregnant, but it's very early and that she didn't plan to share until after first tri but is showing so early since it's baby #2.  Then she pulled her shirt tight and showed her little bump.  I was surprised and totally taken aback - we were not close and she didn't seem thrilled (but I guess bc she was sharing when she wasn't quite ready).  I realized later that when washing our hands she must have thought that I looked at her bump in the mirror and felt the need to tell me/explain.  I felt so bad.  I hadn't looked at her bump!  She was wearing a loose top and layers.  Just wanted to share this as I was so in my own head that I really wasn't paying any attention to her/her body.  Most times this is the case and people are too consumed in their own crap to really observe you... so if you are stressing just get out of your own head.  Especially now after the holidays it's totally normal to be carrying extra weight.  

RedBaramid

Good news, my kid got her crap together yesterday and I got to eat the garbage hash browns with chili I had been craving all day. Also feeling some deep regret that my hormones got the best of me yesterday and I word vomited all over another thread with personal drama.

Lastly my child is on one still despite the turn around yesterday. I'm trying to not snap at her for being a little kid but oooohhhh she knows how to push my buttons. I just keep repeating to myself "We do not negotiate with terrorists" because her whining is killing me and it would be easy to give in but I don't want to set that precedent that if she whines enough I'll cave. 

tyrion_

NIPT results came in so fast! Everything is low risk, thank God. We will find out the sex tonight with family. I’m excited to share with my kids finally. 

ziggymama06

@tyrion_ Excellent news, yay!!!!  Enjoy sharing the news with your family tonight!

@RedBaramid Yum, hash browns!!!  Don't feel bad for sharing... you needed to let that out and don't want to overload YH... we get it... that's what we are here for girl!  And I would be super upset too if they were dragging their feet!!  Is there any way YH can just share that you're pregnant with the HR rep to get them jumping on actually doing their job and getting you on the health coverage?!  HR should keep it under wraps and not share the info with anyone.

RedBaramid

@ziggymama06 We've kind of thought about that option.. we're just nervous he hasn't worked with the company for a year yet though.. and he is just moving from being a contracted outsider to a permanent employee with the company... so we're nervous to ruffle feathers. The ink isn't dry, we're a little concerned they may "change their minds." We are pretty much 100% positive he won't have any time off besides maybe for the birth and the day after since we're betting they will treat him like a "new hire" as far as time off goes so we're planning on coordinating pretty hard with family to be here to help out with the transition. It's also a big health insurance company... like you've probably heard their name... there is a lot of potential for growth and development, so we just don't want to step on anyone's toes at all. 

riatortillaxo

@RedBaramid I admire your openness! We all need to let out our feelings and this is a perfect platform for what you expressed. It helps us all get to know each other and support one another during this vulnerable time. 

riatortillaxo

In addition to the nosy people at work, a general frustrating thing about being pregnant is that people cease to see you as a person anymore. You're just a baby carrier. Everyone only asks about the baby. What hospital will you deliver at? How have you been feeling? Do you think it's a boy or a girl? No one ever cares about your job or your hobbies or interests anymore! 

ziggymama06

@RedBaramid Ah, I see.  Hopefully everything goes smoothly and you get coverage soon!!  How ironic that an insurance company is dragging their feet getting their employees covered with insurance?!  Ha!

fitandnerdy

@blackgirlmagic the meme made me LOL... I just found out I will be giving a presentation at 22 weeks and as a FTM who is a bit taller/broader, I am wondering if I will be at the clearly pregnant stage or if people who don't know might just think I've gotten a bit fat 

I am kind of dreading telling "work"... since I'm a grad student it's not like anyway will have to pick up an extra workload, I'm more just concerned about the stigma that I will receive being in a mostly male dominated field. My direct advisor will be great and I think she will help with navigate the stigma and will try to help me stay on track as far as graduation goes, but I have a sense that other people in the department will think less of me when they find out. An older student had babies in grad school and some peers in my cohort will say things like "I can't believe so and so is having a baby... she's going to have such terrible job prospects... what a terrible decision to have a child now" etc... This student ended up more than fine upon graduation, but I know people will say the same things about me now

I was also having such issues with the app/mobile browser that I just disappeared for the past week. Didn't figure out the @gomillis hack, but I finally just decided to pull out my laptop 

riatortillaxo

@fitandnerdy That's terrible!!! I hope you don't have to deal with that. 

tyrion_

@fitandnerdy I’m sorry you’re in a position to feel less than because of your pregnancy. It’s so stunning that this day and age we still have to have anxiety about how it’ll impact our career and professional standing. It’s so unfair. 

@RedBaramid waiting on insurance while pregnant is extremely stressful. Don’t apologize for venting about something like that. Better out than in! I hope it’s behind you soon, though. 

ziggymama06

@fitandnerdy I'm sorry you are in that position, but at least you have a strong female to help guide you.  I hope there's no talk like that about you.  Honestly screw them.  Haters are going to hate no matter what.  Just keep your head high and show them!  

[Deleted User]

Let them talk!  @fitandnerdy The joke is on them because the one thing it does legit get harder to do as you get older IS HAVE KIDS!!!!  There is absolutely no reason to think that having kids now will ruin your job prospects, if what you really want as a person - AND a mom - is to have a career.  Fx you don't have to hear too much of that, but honestly, I would just laugh it off, smile and nod and keep it moving.  If there are two things I regret in life one is not going to medical school, and the other is how long it took me to get around to having kids! 🤷 Cest la vie, but anyway, you do you.  Nmnd the haters. Lol

gomillis

@fitandnerdy I’m sorry you’re facing potential stigma. I’m a former academic (I have a PhD in psychology) and know the stigma well. I ended up leaving academia because it was so hostile to women with children, but now have a fantastic job in industry with a ton of work life balance. I hope and feel confident that  if continuing in academia is your dream, it will work out, but I’m living proof that even if it doesn’t, you can still have a fulfilling career.