April 2020 Moms

Baby Showers

If we’re discussing registries, then soon we’ll be needing to talk baby showers!

All - Are you having one? Who is organizing? What are your plans? When will you schedule it?

STMs+ - What did you learn from your first? If you’re having a shower this time, how will it be different? 

Feel free to expand on these questions! This is just to get us started!

Re: Baby Showers

  • I hope people post here! I'm currently planning my SIL's shower, and the only one I've been to is my own so I have no frame of reference for what is good and bad
  • I had a brunch shower for my 1st- close friends and women of my family. It was nice to celebrate and the gifts were a cute perk. We didn't do anything for Spencer bc we got pregnant when Kenzie was only 9mos so we had most things, and we were in the middle of selling our place, buying a new one, and Kenzie having open heart surgery so we were overwhelmed. 
    I would love to do a baby brunch or something for this one. Just to celebrate that we made it through everything and we are excited. But I doubt we will do anything unless I arrange and host it, which seems weird.
    We had a nice meal, gifts, and no games just advice cards and fun stories about the 'mom to be'
    TW: 
    1 infant loss
    8/17: Our daughter was born
    8/18: Our daughter kicked open heart surgery ass
    2/19: We lost our son to Prader-Willi/Paradoxical Vocal Cord/ Noonans at 6wks old 
    4/26/2020: EDD for baby #3!!!
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  • All - Are you having one? Who is organizing? What are your plans? When will you schedule it?

    STM, so I’m asking my family not to throw a shower. It’s not really proper etiquette to have a shower with a second baby. Plus, the family shower I had last time ended in some drama. Don’t really need to repeat that.  Work will probably do something. We love parties, so any excuse to have one. Plus, this is the first girl pregnancy in our office in a long time. There have been 4 boys born since I started here 6 years ago and no girls. Everyone will want to buy dresses and bows. I’m going to tell them to keep it small and do a diaper party. 

    STMs+ - What did you learn from your first? If you’re having a shower this time, how will it be different?

    So, I learned to be clear about the guest list. My mom’s sisters threw me a shower last time and invited a lot of people that I’m vaguely related to, but don’t really know. It felt like begging for gifts, which made me uncomfortable. Plus, there were like 50 people there and I traveled for it, so I didn’t time get to interact with the people I wanted to see enough. Also, as I mentioned, it ended with some family drama with a fight between my mom and my cousin. But, the shower itself was beautiful. My aunts did a great job with the decorations and the finger foods. And if was overall a great way to celebrate my baby with family. 

    I also had a huge shower at work last time, which is why I’m going to ask them to keep it simple this time, and a small shower with close family and friends here in town. The small shower was lovely and so much fun. Just a nice day to hang out with people we really care about. 


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    Me 34 DH 34 
    PCOS

    DS1 born September 2017
    Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
  • My parents planned my shower. Very low key shower at my parent's house with mostly family and a few friends. I think we did it somewhere around 33 weeks which is a good time since I delivered at 37 weeks. Had snacks, cake, rootbeer floats. Some baby shower games which I don't really like, but are inevitable.
    This time, I don't want a shower. I know some STMs do a shower/sprinkle or a diaper/wipes party. 
    One thing to consider is whether or not you want a girls only shower or a coed shower. We recently attended a coed shower and it was very nice.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • To @Kathryn0903’s point, ours were all coed and I really enjoyed that. Plus, I didn’t have any games, because I’m not a huge fan of shower games. The one I did for SIL last year was girls only with a bunch of games. Such a different experience, but it was what she wanted. 

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Me 34 DH 34 
    PCOS

    DS1 born September 2017
    Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
  • All - Are you having one? Who is organizing? What are your plans? When will you schedule it?

    STM+ over here, I have specifically told close family and friends that I do not want anything (I've already been asked). My MIL really wants to host a shower (I think because my Mom did the one for DD), but it is just not something I am comfortable with or want. I have a few girlfriends that I think want to organize a brunch, but I've asked if they do that to keep it just as a brunch celebrating baby and not something involving decorations/gifts. 

    STMs+ - What did you learn from your first? If you’re having a shower this time, how will it be different? 

    My shower was amazing for DD, pretty traditional. My Mom hosted it outside under a tent at a local restaurant and there were 60-70 people (I am from a massive family, my wedding was 200+). It was a bee themed brunch. I was still a wedding planner at the time so she contacted a lot of my vendors who did the flowers/invites/decor. We played two games.....Guess the price- she had a table full of baby items with different prices to choose from (the price is right style) and then match the mama animal to the baby animal (cow-calf, etc). It was the perfect way to celebrate baby girl and more than I could have ever asked for. I was very hands off with the planning, my Mom did all of it with my Aunts so I can't really say I learned much.

  • I have thrown several showers for my sisters in the past few years, so I know my sisters will want to plan something. My husband's extended family is huge and close so I think his mom will want to throw something as well. I'm hoping they will combine forces.

    Because of my social anxiety, work knows that my preference in general is for no celebrations. But my boss reached out because many people are asking and hoping to do something. So, I told her it was OK as long as it was not a surprise. 

    For those who are not into really hosting games - what I did with my sisters was a games table that folks could participate in or not and then prizes awarded at the end. Games included - guess the celebrity baby photo, baby food tasting, baby word jumbles, guess the # of m&ms, match the animal with the name for its babies, onesie or quilt square decorating. We also had a few easy crafts and baby-themed coloring pages for kids. 
  • sanpelligrinosanpelligrino member
    edited November 2019
    All - Are you having one? Who is organizing? What are your plans? When will you schedule it?

    I have been involved in organizing a few showers in the past, I think my in-laws and friends will want to plan something since this is our first baby. My side of the family is pretty big so I assume they will plan something as well. I don't want too many showers but at the same time, I do want a smaller crowd so I get to interact with folks. I prefer the co-ed ones and don't think i'll want too many games where the men are bored. 

    I would ideally like it scheduled in Jan or Feb so I can start planning to buy what I haven't received as gifts. I dont think i would be very comfortable with family or friends buying me big or expensive gifts (think strollers or car seats), so i plan to communicate that well. I think we'll end up including the link to our registry and only have the smaller items on it. 
  • All - Are you having one? Who is organizing? What are your plans? When will you schedule it?

    Pregnant with my third. My mom is going to throw a very small sprinkle for this baby sometime in February. She just bought and is renovating her new home so it started as a get together for that. 

    STMs+ - What did you learn from your first? If you’re having a shower this time, how will it be different? 

    I had two showers for my first baby (both sides of the family) and both were huge and over the top. First grandchild on my side and first grandson on MH’s side So everyone was very excited. I didn’t know everyone and that was very awkward for me. I told my mom it was to be very small and intimate, plan to really control the guest list and it won’t be anyone who went to my first shower 5 years ago. I also want it to be casual. 

    Diagnosed PCOS 2013
    7th Round of Fertility treatment (Femara + Ovidrel + IUI) 12/14 = BFP. DS born Sept.15 
    Natural BFP Feb 2017. DD born Oct. 2017
    Natural BFP Aug. 2019, EDD April 2020

  • SIL just asked to throw me a “sprinkle,” so I might not be able to get out of the second baby shower altogether. Maybe something really small where gifts are not required. 

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Me 34 DH 34 
    PCOS

    DS1 born September 2017
    Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
  • This is my 2nd, with a 14 year age gap, so I will definitely be having a baby shower. I'm thinking my mom will host but we haven't talked about it yet. Also, my work will be throwing a baby shower for me.
  • Thank you all for jumping in here! 

    My family wants to plan a shower, but there are only a few family members who would be able to travel to us, so I don’t know if it makes sense. I have some friends who will probably want to do a small gathering like we did for the first pregnancy in the friend group, and I think work will do a little event as well because we did one for the last baby in the office. 

    I would prefer to host a coed party in February at our home for anyone who can make it - friends and family. I’m not sure if it’s weird for me to host it though, so I might talk to the friends who would want to put a shower together and ask them to help me plan this party instead. 

    I do know that I would like to ask for books in lieu of cards - one of my friends did this at her shower and it went over really well. 
  • @jenabary my bff and her husband hosted a coed shower for themselves and it was the most fun shower I’ve been to. They did enlist someone to run a game but otherwise it was just like a nice casual reception. We are going to do the same thing since we enjoyed it so much.

    Coed also means a bigger guest list and we feel better taking on the expense of a big party ourselves versus asking a sibling to do it. 
  • I’m definitely having one and it’s being organized and hosted by my mom and my sister. I think it’s for mid/end of February but I’m not sure and I thinnnnnk it’s at this adorable little inn that I love, but again, I’m not sure. I don’t know anything about potential themes or decor but my taste is pretty girly but refined so I assume the shower would be the same (if my soul had a color it would be rose gold) - I hate any sort of loud colors or patterns. 
  • My mom keeps asking if I’ve thought about what I want for a shower. I think we will have it in February and haven’t decided what part of the state we will have it. Southern Maine is more convenient for any of my college friends that may come, western Maine is more convenient for family and where we live isn't convenient for anyone, but my husband and I (we decided to rule that out). I really like co-Ed showers and have been invited to a couple Baby-ques in the summer, which was cool, but I don’t know what similar thing you could do in the winter here. 
  • My sister and two of my best friends are planning ours. They're planning it for January 3rd because my best friend from the East Coast will be in town. If it weren't for that it's a little earlier than I would have wanted it (I'll only be between 23 and 24 weeks) but I'm so excited that she'll be able to be here to throw it! Also it means we'll have lots of time on the flip side  to organize everything and figure out what we still need to buy.

    We're doing it coed, which I've loved the idea of since attending a coed shower for friends of ours, but it does mean the guest list is a lot higher. That said, since it's being planned right on the tail end of Christmas season I suspect there will be a lot of people who won't be able to make it.

    I like some minimal shower games, but requested no diaper chocolate games and no baby taste test games (no judgment if you like them, I just know a lot in my circle aren't a fan). I'm hoping it'll mostly just be another fun reason to hang out with our near and dear and get excited about bean together.
  • Should I give awards for winning? I guess the only "win" is the candy in a jar. Does a $10 Starbucks card sound too cheap as a prize?

    For the SIL shower I'm planning, we're doing those advice cards, guess how many of the candy are in a jar, write your favorite baby name on a board, guess the sex (with fortune cookie reveal) and I think that's it? They're passive activities, but the parents didn't want anything embarrassing. 

    Also planning a sex reveal that doesn't include pink or blue was SO HARD. All the ideas were like, use different colors and tell them which color is which. I like this idea a lot though. The fortune cookies all have "it's a girl!" And everyone gets to open one and share in the excitement.


  • @babybison I gave out prizes for game wins, along the $5 mark as well. A bunch of cute items from the Target Dollar Spot in a basket that the winner could choose from. 
  • @babybison I usually give out prizes for shower games. I don't think a $10 gift card is too cheap. My Mom did Bath & Body Works soap/lotion for my shower. For the Bridal Shower I hosted in Feb, we did Lindt chocolates and bath bombs.
  • @babybison I love the fortune cookie idea! Also for colours I know some people assign different colours, like yellow for boy, green for girl. You could also just have a rainbow or jewel tone or metallics colour theme. It's your party! The world is your oyster. 
  • Bumping up this post in case anyone wants to share their plans or ask questions related to baby showers!
  • People mentioned throwing a baby shower for me when I publicly announced our pregnancy, but no one has talked to me seriously about throwing one. We live about 3ish hours away from my family and 18 hours away from my in-laws, but we have friends and attend a church in the area. I'm the kind of person who would probably start planning it now so I'm trying not to be anxious about it. I'm a FTM, and I'm really looking forward to having a baby shower. When would a baby shower usually be thrown if I'm due April 30th? 
  • @sbalding88 I think mine was around when I was 33 weeks pregnant.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @sbalding88 I think February or March would be reasonable for a late April due date. I’m early April and I think my shower will be the middle of February. 
  • Oh my goodness gracious @korthouse that looks so adorable! I love the theme! And the onesie decorating is perfection!! ❤️
  • @korthouse that looks like so much fun!
  • @literatureandink @babybison Thanks gals! It was a blast <3
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