November 2019 Moms

August Randoms

Woo Another month down & I am officially in double digits.  Prepare yourself for a GIF party thread next.

Hope everyone has a fun weekend plan.  We leave tomorrow for Boston and celebrating 5 years!
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Re: August Randoms

  • Picking up from the last one....

    @creamcheeseplease ugh! That sounds like a bummer way to start the morning. I hope you feel better and get some rest working from home. I’ve been so stressed too about work and can definitely feel it physically more. 

    @Dancer688 Happy 5 years!!! 🤗
  • What are all the seasoned parents planning on doing with their older kids when they go in for delivery? Ive been wondering what we should do. Last time my husband stayed in the hospital the whole time with me but now that we have a 3 year old at home and no family in the area, I assume he will need to be home with her. He doesnt love that idea. And since we are having winter babies Im not even sure she will be allowed in the hospital due to cold and flu season. My parents and in laws all live an hour and a half away so could come up to help but my parents would be hesitant to do so. My MIL totally would and my FIL actually works in the area so in a pinch if he is available he could come by and lend a hand (but he would be anxious about it). Any one making plans on what they are going to do with existing kids? I almost hope I go in to labor on a Friday again because daycare can usually pick her up for an extra day on Fridays.
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  • @purplefan1 - Last time we lived in an area with no family and we flew/had the family come in to help once it got closer.  I was 4 cm at 39 weeks so the OB said it wouldn't be long.  At that point we freaked out haha So called in the family.

    My MIL stayed with us for 3-4 days when I hit 39 weeks. Then she left and my mom came in at that point to stay for 2 weeks.  Ended up going into labor 2 days before my due date so it was good that we had them and the peace of mind by having them stay.

    This go around with 2 lovelies at home.  I have 3 college students/babysitters whom I feel comfortable enough with calling in the middle of the night if my water breaks like with my first one.  That way we can get situated at the hospital before my husband either has to go back or one set of grandparents can get there. If it is middle of the day, the girls will be come with us until grandparents or a babysitter can get them.
  • @purplefan1 my parents are planning to come visit for my sons birthday at the end of October. And will stay through Thanksgiving, so we'll have help from them with DS. But if something happens before my parents get here, my ILs are 3.5 hours away and will be here asap when they get the call I'm in labor. Worst case scenario, I know I could ask a few friends to be on standby just in case until the inlaws get here.
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    @purplefan1 I'm just hoping I go into labor on a weekday soon after daycare drop off then my mom (who is an hour away) or my MIL (4 hours away) would have time to pick her up haha. I'm thinking the more likely situation will be that we end up taking her with us and my mom meets us at the hospital to take her back to our house. I don't want to be induced again, but not gonna lie it would be so easy to have it scheduled so I could just make arrangements in advance. 

    I should probably get more on top of game planning this...
  • @purplefan1 my MIL is going to come up for a week or two. She can catch a quick flight and be here within a few hours if need be. I’m also tossing around the idea of a sibling doula for my 5 year old. I kinda want her to be in the room with us when I deliver so she can see her baby brother being born. She is just so curious and I think she could handle it.

    My MIL will stay for a week or so just to help with the other kids so I can sleep and rest when I need to. I like to have my main focus on the baby that first week. That way we can work out any kinks with nursing and I can go to doctor appointments without the other kids. 
  • Jealous of you guys who have family who will come stay. That isnt our situation at all. Even if someone could come help, they would be very limited in the time they could stay. Worst case scenario, my husband just cant be at the hospital with me. But between daycare days Monday and Wednesday and being able to pick up a Friday,  we should be covered for a lot of days during the day time. And my neighbor is a home daycare person and i know will help out. If I could plan it I would try for a middle of the night labor starting on either Sunday or Tuesday and then my husband could drop kiddo off at daycare and join me. First labor was an induction and was started at 1pm and she was out just before midnight. Ive read second labors are shorter some times by almost half so hopefully that would give me plenty of time to give birth while she is at daycare. Gah. It will all work out.
  • @purplefan1 it would be nice if hospitals had some sort of daycare type facility to help in situations like yours... do they? I'm used to my small town hospital that doesn't have anything cool (although I did just read they were the first hospital in CA to offer tub births, so go us lol), but idk about other places. I'm sure it would still not be the first choice, but at least she would be nearby and you wouldn't have to scramble to find someone at midnight? 
  • @purplefan1 it will all work out!  Have you thought of interviewing babysitters to have on standby?  Maybe a friend of your neighbor’s or someone who works at her daycare would be able to stay at your house at least through labor until the baby is born and your husband can get home.

    I haven’t talked to my husband about this yet but I’ve been meaning to.  My son is a bit anxious already and is so sensitive to his routines that I really don’t want to throw him off by having him sleep at my sister’s or my in-laws for a few nights before bringing home baby.  I think it’ll just be a recipe for disaster with too many new and different things to transition into. So, my tentative plan is to have my husband stay with me in the hospital through labor and birth, then sleep at home so my son can be at home and get some attention as big brother.  Honestly, I’d rather at least one of us be well-rested for week #1 and that definitely won’t happen if he stays in the hospital.  We shall see!
  • It's stressful trying to come up with the best plan for the older kid(s) while baby is born. Obviously I don't want another c/s for obvious reasons although that would make figuring out what to do with DS much easier. My parents live about 45 minutes away so they will come and take care of DS. I haven't talked to them yet about if they will come to our house and stay or if DS will go to theirs. Ideally they will come and stay at our house, which is closer to the hospital anyway and then MH can go home and be with DS a bit. Honestly I'd rather he stayed with DS at night too @rogro118, maybe after the first night. I don't want my parents to have to disrupt their whole routing for 2-3 days.

    I read somewhere that my hospital has a restriction on kids under 14 right now due to measles outbreak, but I can't find it again, so I need to ask about that. I'm going to be a bit sad if DS can't come see me/baby in the hospital.

    @Dancer688 happy 5 years!

    @mc0303 yeah stress is really getting to me in a way that it usually doesn't :( I'm sorry you're also having work stress. Are you leaving your job?
  • @creamcheeseplease boo for work stress! I probably won’t leave until after maternity leave...if I can make it that long. Everything seems so amplified lately. How about you??
  • @rogro118 I am similar and would prefer my 3 year old have the most  stability possible during this transition. So really we only need to figure out how to get labor and delivery covered and then I think my husband should go home to be with her. Hopefully too I will only be in the hospital for 2 days at the most 
  • I just bought a ton of baby clothes from Target. They have super cute stuff right now. 
  • Our families are 1 and 2 states away. My mother is planning to come out to stay with DS during delivery and fir a week or two after.  Due to my age/conditions I will be induced week 39 unless there is indication for a repeat c-section.  We have a back-up plan in the works in case I go into labor spontaneously before my Mom comes out: there are two friends in town that DS knows and would be ok with. We are talking to them about being back up care during labor.  Our hospital won't allow children to visit during flu season.  At the hospital tour I plan to ask if they can at least bring him to the lobby so I can see him after labor even if he can't see the baby until we are discharged.  

    Anyone you have playdates with that could take your toddler or stay with him during labor?  Or a teacher at the daycare you would feel comfortable approaching about paid sitting during labor?
  • @mc0303 I’ll be seriously looking for a new job while on leave, but I don’t think I can afford to not have a full time job. My PT job would not cover enough of our expenses. So unless I get something else I’ll be going back. I’m just trying to remember that even if I have to go back it took my almost a year to find a new job after I went back to my old job after my maternity with my son. It takes time. 

    Im waiting to get my hair cut. I don’t think it’s been cut since either before I got pregnant or maybe right after I found out, I can’t remember. Anyway I really need these ends fixed.. it’s just a limp sad situation right now. 
  • @creamcheeseplease enjoy your haircut!  They can be so relaxing when you have the right stylist.   Mine moved and I haven't found a good one, so I gave up and I just trim it myself now. 

    Finding a new job is hard.  I am on the job market now too. I don't know how I will handle it if I manage to get invited for a job talk in November or December.  
  • gadzooks_3gadzooks_3 member
    edited August 2019
    I go back to teaching on Tuesday and I do not feel ready.  My syllabus isn't done, but it is Sociology of Gender which is a specialty area of mine, so I am sure it will be done in time. I just don't feel ready to be in a classroom again yet.  It is summer session so that means 3-hour lectures.  I requested a high stool or chair to have in the classroom if I need it and you would think I demanded they build a ramp with the amount of bureaucratic hullabaloo that ensued! They tell me it will be there though. Last time I lectured through a pregnancy I also had a 3-hour class and I nearly fainted at 7 months, so I just wanted to think ahead.  I am so behind on other projects too - paper deadlines and prepping for the job market. Academic job season is starting up so even though I won't teach in the fall I will be busy. Oh, and I might lose my office space fall quarter! I do not want to have to box up and move all my books and things and store them fir 12 weeks! 😟 I hope they can just let me keep the desk.

    Edited to correct a typo 
  • @emeraldcity1214 I was just on weather.com and one of the suggested videos wasn’t about how this is the warmest month on record in Alaska and it made me think of you. Hope you’re beating the heat
  • My boss just confirmed the air in my office isnt working. And it hasnt been for the last month if not two. I just figured it was pregnancy making me sweat to death. And the air in my car doesnt work either. Im having to take 2-3 showers a day because I cant stand being hot or stinking and all I seem to be doing lately is sweating. Plus Ive been wearing spankx under my clothes for pelvic stability which just adds a layer of heat. I just want to be naked and starfish all day every day.
  • @purplefan1 - That sucksssssssss.  Is your office providing you with a fan at least?
  • @kopp5988 actually last month was the hottest because it got up to the upper 80’s and may have hit 90 at one point. I was so hot it was making me nauseous because we don’t have an AC in the house. This month has stayed mostly in the mid 60’s with a few days reaching the mid 70’s. I have really enjoyed those days. We spent the afternoon at the lake yesterday and the kids had so much fun. 

    Also, we apparently had an earthquake this morning. It woke my husband from a dead sleep but because I was on the lower level I didn’t feel it at all. 🤷🏻‍♀️
  • @emeraldcity1214 ah okay I guess it was referring to last month, that’s good then because I remember you talking about how bad it was- glad it’s not even worse this month and your getting some relief! And glad the earthquake wasn’t big enough to wake you up as well 
  • @purplefan1 that is not ok about the air.. I actually think that depending on where you are located there are regulations about how hot or cold it can be in the office? I know year and years ago the air broke at my job and it actually got so hot they had to send us home until it could be fixed.

    @emeraldcity1214 crazy about the earthquake!!

    @drama_llama are you a college professor? Crazy that asking for a stool was such a big problem for them. I hope it is there for you when you start!

    AFM, got about 3 inches cut off my hair which is good considering I tend to wait 6-8 months before getting a cut, haha. I'm trying to finish up a couple reports today and tomorrow and then Friday I'll be working from home so just trying to hold out for that.
  • @purplefan1 I don’t know how you survived for so long!! My office was broken for a day and we just about rioted. It’s been fixed but I brought in a tower fan anyway because I‘m still too warm. 

    @creamcheeseplease I love new haircuts! I’ve been thinking about trimming mine. I’m the same way...I’ll cut mine maybe twice a year. 

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    @purplefan1 That sounds miserable! I get hot in our office on Mondays simply because they turn the AC off over the weekend and it's still cooling off. I can't imagine having the AC not working!

    @creamcheeseplease I love a good haircut! A few months ago I cut mine into a long bob and it felt great. Now I'm trying to grow it out again and it's in an awkward looking stage. I feel like last pregnancy I had amazing hair and not so much this time around. It's probably also the fact that I'm pregnant during the peak of humidity this time.

    @emeraldcity1214 I can't believe there was an earthquake, that's crazy! Glad it wasn't too bad.
  • Apparently there are lots of earthquakes in the area I live in. They had a huge one about 6 months ago. My backyard has a huge crack that goes across it. My neighbor told me he was out walking his dog and heard it coming and then when it hit, he fell to the ground and had to ride it on that way because he couldn’t stand back up. He said that it is very normal to have smaller ones, like the one we had yesterday, every few months or so. 

    Today we are headed to to the fair. It’s sorta rainy so I’m not sure how much we will be doing that is outside but DH said they have tons of stuff to do that is inside as well. I can’t wait to look at all the venders. I love that kind of stuff. 

    @creamcheeseplease I only get a haircut every year to 18 months. 😂 I just hate having to schedule it with my husband and then it kills me to pay for it. I hope you had a relaxing time. I had one stylist who would give me a scalp massage and if that happened every time I went, I would likely go way more often. 

    Also, my MIL sent me a link to that hammock thing that attaches to the crib. 😒 Why she thinks I want to use that, I will never know. I don’t like anything that requires a huge sleep transition. 
  • I just feel bad for my clients. We are stuck in that office for a 45-60 minute session and for the most part they havent been complaining but it has felt stifling to me. Luckily the air works in other parts of the building so i get some cool air but need my door to be open to get it. Which I cant hold a session with the door open. And Im in there some days for 11 hours. My boss is awesome and is already getting it fixed. I should have said something earlier. I only complained when a client complained. Im also going to work on getting my air in my car recharged this week.
  • @creamcheeseplease yes, college.  I am adjuncting until my spouse finishes his degree.   The office staff was nice about it and did work it out (though the one they got does not look very sturdy and I am a little worried) but the University was so strange about it. I know they have to have a warehouse somewhere with like 70 chairs, so this really shouldn't have been hard. They made the department buy one!
  • @drama_llama haha things are like that where I work sometimes - like, there's a whole room of unused chairs and stuff next to my office, but if another department wanted to take that stuff, the company would likely force them to buy new ones instead so that the department is "charged." Hope the stool is sturdy enough for you!

    I have been working on this project nearly non-stop for several days and I'm still not happy with it, but the client wants it done, so I think I'm going to turn it in after today and just see what happens. I have a hard time letting go where I feel like I could do better. Also, I got a referral yesterday and she emailed me at like 2pm. I figured I'd reply to her later that evening since I was busy. She called me at 5:30pm to follow up on the email she'd sent! I mean, really.
  • @creamcheeseplease wow! That’s so annoying! Who does that? I would never follow up that soon...and if it was really urgent I would have called first
  • GUYSSSSSSSS - I just was nosing around on August BMB because I wanted to see some birth stories and OMG babies are around the corner.  There are people having babies at 32/33 weeks.  It looks like they are doing well but Oh man, we are only a month/month and a half away from that. 

    Reading those made it so much more real than just seeing the under 100 days on my app or even the ultrasound.  
  • @Dancer688 eek! I don’t want to go into labor any earlier than 36 weeks. Especially since DH has to work out of town when I’m 36 weeks. 😑 
  • It seems a lot of the BMBs are in PGs or FB before birth so there don’t seem to be many birth stories around anymore. I agree though I can’t believe we’re approaching the 30w mark. That’s when I feel like stuff gets super real for me. 
  • @creamcheeseplease - What is PGs?  I am on facebook (although not at all active) and so I was trying to figure out what PG was since that seems where the majority of people transition to.
  • @dancer688 PG means Private Group on the bump :)
  • @emeraldcity1214, same boat! My husband is going away for four nights at 35 weeks 😬
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    Last night I told my husband that I'm almost in my 3rd trimester and all of a sudden it dawned on us that that means we only have 13ish weeks left  :# There is still so much to do I feel like and holy cow this has flown by!
  • I DO want this one to come early. My due date is 11.1 and thats the same day my insurance deductible renews.... and I have a $5,000.00 high deductible plan  :(
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