PGAL March 2020

Noodlepig

I think there may be a few of us in this group so I thought I’d get this thread going.  My story is a son in nov 15 then when we started trying for number 2 we had a loss in may 2018 and another loss in jan this year.  I’m trying to be excited as this time around was ivf and we did all the chromosomal screenings that we could but gosh I’m scared and hopeful at the same time but I’d be lying if I said the scared didn’t take over at times.  Anyone else going through similar?

mamagretsch

@noodlepig hi! Yes, kind of. We lose every other pregnancy, so by that this pregnancy would be a loss. So holding our breath until betas come back and early ultrasound. 
We have 4 girls at home. We lost our 2nd daughter at 37w5d, no cause of death, she was absolutely perfect. We had an ectopic, blighted ovum, and 2 chemical pregnancies. 
It's hard. Thinking of you! 

miss.sally

Hi! Definitely in the same boat. Being PGAL is a total mindf*ck. There are days where I feel totally fine, and days where my anxiety completely takes over. But I’m trying to repeat mantras and stay positive. I got my third beta back at midnight last night and it looked great (69, 293, 1,333). So I’m done with betas for the time being and I’ll have my first appointment at the end of July, and a scan shortly thereafter.  

treetop19

I feel all of your pain.    I'm so nervous this time around.  I have a 12 year old DD, then had two miscarriages before having my now 3-year old DS.  The pregnancy after DS I had a late 1st tri/early 2nd tri  miscarriage, and found out through early testing that it was a boy who had down syndrome. That baby would have been due March 2019.. so finding it a little surreal that now I'm looking at the possibility of a March 2020 baby, and I'm terrified it won't work out again.  Have my first blood draw today.. fingers crossed for good betas.

EmilyLove25

@treetop19 Hugs! The anxiety is so real. I hope you get good betas!

miss.sally

@treetop19 keep us posted as to what your betas are! Thinking of you today. 

kagesstarshroom

@noodlepig Thanks so much for starting this! When I tested earlier today, I put solace in knowing that if it meant moving from TTGP to a BMB, this thread would be here since it was Wednesday! (I had been lurking *just in case*.) Definitely have the similar nerves about being KU this time, for sure.

@miss.sally haha i used the SAME EXACT WORD you use above below, and I wrote all that first before doing tags. Ugh, it really is, isn't it? I'm so glad that your betas look so good & you have your first appt to look forward to. 

@treetop19 Keep us updated about betas results! Waiting for those is the worst. I also am feeling like this is all totally surreal still.

Hi there! Checking in here--got my BFP today--total mindf**k, as we all know here. As much as I wish a loss or multiple on no one, it is nice to have others in the same boat bc I am definitely freaked out right now. My loss history is a CP in Oct. of 2018 and an MMC w/ D&C in Jan/Feb. of this year. Those were my only two PGs, so hoping this potential March baby will make me officially a mom come 2020. 

I've decided not to do betas--for two reasons. One, which is something I am going to have to get over really fast, is that I still owe my ob's office a ton of $ I can't currently pay back from my most recent loss. I send them something every month, which is all they need, but I still feel like... they will judge me or tell me I can't come in or something. Secondly, I think betas will give me MORE anxiety rather than less. I was a MESS last time. Looking to stay positive and hope for the best come our first reg. appointment.

Which brings me to a question: should I still call them and tell them I am KU & schedule that, even if I don't want to go in until the standard first appt?

Anyway, I'm so hesitant and tentative to get to know people here and/or celebrate (haven't even told DH yet--I did this last time though, held out for a bit. IDK if that is normal, but that's me-- I am waiting for those lines to get stronger on a few retests over the next couple of days & to really feel like this is happening & then hoping, hoping, hoping I can make it to March this time!

For these threads in the future, can whoever starts it copy a draft of a prompt from a previous board? I think a thread like this works best when at the top it has a prompt, even if it's optional to fill in,  and then can devolve into just conversation from there.

ETA: to fix tag

kagesstarshroom

O! Just realized there is a weekly and that's what I was looking for/mean when I was talking about the prompts/Wednesdays and such. So I encourage everyone to head over there, too, as I believe in our intro/instructions PGAL is weekly--and makes sense considering all the replies over there.

miss.sally

@kagesstarshroom great minds! And also it’s pretty much the only word that accurately describes the situation. So. 🤷🏼‍♀️