March 2019 Moms

To All the Lurkers :)

keikilovekeikilove member
edited October 2018 in March 2019 Moms
Hi mamas! There are about 500 of us in the Intro thread alone, so where are you hiding? The regular posters are getting to know each other pretty well, which is super fun. However, we’ve been noticing that our board is kind of slow (especially Saturday-Monday) and not very ‘spicy’. :) Please feel free to add your voices and make this even more of an inclusive community. We’d love to hear from YOU!
«1

Re: To All the Lurkers :)

  • I read every post, minus the question one because my app sucks and makes me find my spot everytime. I think the difference between me and the “regulars”  are I’m not really here to get to know people. I am here to read what other women’s symptoms, ideas, feelings, opinions, etc are. Mainly about what they are going through with pregnancy, parenting and life at the same stage I am in pregnancy. This board is clicky and inclusive, not inviting, all in all the interactions between the “regulars” seem fake and at service level. That isn’t me being judgy, some women like that sort of interaction, it’s just not for me. I will continue to “lurk”. I think that is a funny name for people who simply want to read the forum. If I have anything to add that hasn’t been said numerous times by the “regulars” I’ll add it. 
  • keikilovekeikilove member
    edited October 2018
    @mountainmama3r Thanks for your response & sharing your perspective. I’m sure a lot of people share your sentiments; we are all here for different purposes. Personally, I’m grateful for this new life growing but I don’t like pregnancy *at all* so groups like this help me pass the time a lot more pleasantly. I look forward to reading when you want to chime in. I also edited the post slightly so hopefully it reads in the welcoming way that I meant it. 

    PS: No offense or snark intended with the term “lurker”. It’s the cardinal rule of these boards to lurk before jumping in—which I did before trepidatiously joining this group—so I just used that common term. 

    PPS: The app was so glitchy that I finally followed a tip posted by @lovesclimbing & accessed the site through a browser on my phone. Problems solved. You may want to try it b/c the Question thread can be pretty interesting & informative. 
  • Loading the player...
  • @keikilove I had this same thought yesterday when I saw the intros thread had so many posts! I think some of that # is chit chat but we definitely seem to have a smallish pool of active members and a large group of passive observers. 
    Come out, come out wherever you are! :mrgreen:
    Me: 30 DH: 31
    Married: 2012
    BFP #1 Sept 2014, MMC Dec 2014 | BFP #2 May 2015, DD Jan 2016 <3 | BFP #3 May 2017, MC July 2017 | BFP #4 Jan 2018, MC Feb 2018 | BFP #5 July 2018, fingers crossed
  • @mamaoftwomonkeys - i'm not sure there is anyone in this group that i know well enough to decide whether or not they'd be my real-life-friend. this is an internet chat room and people need to stop taking it so seriously. i'm not looking for friendships, and i don't think @mountainmama3r is either..... so i'm not exactly sure where that's coming from.

    i come to @mountainmama3r's defense because sometimes it seems regulars in this group (and probably other groups but i don't have the time to 'lurk' in those because i could care less) are actively looking to stir up drama to add a little "excitement" to their days. i appreciate @keikilove clarifying what she meant by 'spicy' (see above) - and that example is crystal clear proof that when typing to people who don't know your tone personally, it's only courteous to be very clear. 

    the last thing i'll say is that the group likely slows down on weekends because people have lives and they aren't glued to this chatroom 24/7. if you guys wanted newbies to come out of the woodworks and introduce themselves.... you've let this thread get to a place where they most likely will not. extremely counterproductive.

    newbies who have been 'lurking' - my inbox is always open and once again hopefully you have not been scared off by all the back-and-forth!  
  • And, @indigoheightsblog, to be blunt, if I was a newbie why would I inbox message you if you’ve been quite clear that you have zero interest in making connections?
  • @mamaoftwomonkeys i have plenty of interest in making connections. online. i’m also ALWAYS open to real life friends, but i will never expect that out of an internet chat room. so once again, newbies are more than welcome to inbox me or public message me. it’s a part of my livelihood to connect with people on a digital level and many of those connections have become “in real life” too! but if someone isn’t actively participating in here, clearly they don’t want to. so why push the issue? it’s a public forum first and foremost. let’s not get offended by any internet strangers that don’t have the same desire to be friends.

    I live for making digital connections! How sad that someone would think otherwise. I’ll connect with anyone on here. I just may not show up to your Friendsgiving. I hope that’s clear and that I remain an open invitation for new and regular posters on this forum. 
  • No one is pushing anyone to join if they don't want to. Lurking is just part of the platform here. But we won't always be here. Eventually we plan to migrate. I think the main purpose of this thread (before it immediately went sideways) was to offer an opportunity for people that might not have felt comfortable joining in yet to have an entry point into the community so that we can get to know some more of the hundreds of people that have intro-ed and include them when we go private. Not to bitch about the regulars and why would anyone want to join. If people feel that way then they are invited to stay lurkers. But if someone was looking for a way to join but hadn't yet found the right opportunity, this was meant to be it.

    And we should totally do a Friendsgiving one day!
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
  • @keikilove thanks for the advice on getting the app to work better. 

    @navete your response is ridiculous , (eye roll) ? Who talks like that 

    @meggyme this may surprise you but I doubt anybody really cares who you are, there are plenty of pictures that can be stolen on the internet and I don’t think you have anything to worry about. I have zero plan to migrate, I don’t have facebook. Thank you for your permission to continue to lurk. 

    @mamaoftwomonkeys your post is funny. I’ll continue to Lurk and respond when I please. 

    I want to respond individually to everybody but I have to get back to work. Then I have a life after work so I probably won’t have time. 

    Ill keep up the lurking though!! 
  • @Runninggal28 I find the question thread difficult to follow too and if there are any topics in there I'd like to revisit, it's hard to find it again. So I much prefer specific topic threads to the Questions one but I totally understand that it cleans up a lot of questions that are too specific to an individual.
  • @indigoheightsblog yeah, that "making the cut" verbiage may have been some underlying hard feelings coming through for my prior BMB. When they transitioned to FB, they required that at least two other group members vouched for you to confirm you were a real and active participant from the BMB. I don't blame them for not knowing who I was or for wanting to make sure no randoms joined their Facebook group, but the rejection still stung a little! :s
  • @lindseyb918 Wow, that’s harsh. It’s probably better you didn’t join that Facebook group. 
  • @laur84ns yes! I agree completely.
    Me: 30 DH: 31
    Married: 2012
    BFP #1 Sept 2014, MMC Dec 2014 | BFP #2 May 2015, DD Jan 2016 <3 | BFP #3 May 2017, MC July 2017 | BFP #4 Jan 2018, MC Feb 2018 | BFP #5 July 2018, fingers crossed
  • @mamakate1616 me standing up for what you call a one off or whatever Was not rude or condescending. This is a public forum for March 2019 mamas. I don’t judge anything that is said in here, I participate when I have something to add that hasn’t already been added. If I had an extra hour a day to dedicate to something or like
    a desk job I could stare at my phone regularly, I still probably wouldn’t dedicate time to getting to know strangers on the internet.  Sorry if I offended you. I am having to take extra time to write this post while my boyfriend baths my son. I’m not mad about that though. Maybe I should go hide in a different room every night at bath time and have him do it!! 
  • @Lbloom I have only been on a group like this during this pregnancy and my prior pregnancy. So no (eye roll), (shrugs), (dip toe lightly) is all new verbiage to me. I think it’s silly. It’s like using emojis to convey your feelings instead of just simply writing them out. Maybe I’m old school. Words are powerful. 
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"