Weekly Randoms 8/20

tessiesmom26

@MojieJo happy birthday to the boys! That’s too funny about what he said! 

lifesabeach85

@MojieJo happy birthday to the twins! 

runwmusic

@MojieJo kids got jokes already  happy bday boys!

offtoneverland

I need advice. I'm going to a BBQ at a friend's house today. It's a summer BBQ/kind of birthday party for her twin boys; however, the Facebook invite doesn't say anything about a birthday party, really. It says "Come help us celebrate summer and surviving a year with twins! We’ll have some drinks and grill food." Should I bring a gift for her boys? Since it doesn't specifically say birthday party it doesn't seem like gifts are expected, but I also don't want to be the only one empty handed. 

josie12367

@offtoneverland If it were me,  I would bring a small dish of some sort for the bbq , and then a small present. I would get the boys blowing bubbles, sidewalk chalk, crayons and colouring books... or maybe some finger paint. Just keep it simple  

offtoneverland

Thanks @josie12367. I didn't even think about bringing a dish for the BBQ. I'm so bad at these things.  I'll probably just stop by the store and get some cookies from the bakery or something because I never know what to bring! That's a good idea about the gift--something simple and easy. Thank you!

firsttimespartanmom

@offtoneverland I agree about something small and simple - DH and I have been caught before in the same situation, didn’t bring a gift and we were the only ones who didn’t and we looked super awkward. Even if no one brings anything, you don’t spend too much if you get something small and it all works out! Have fun!

lifesabeach85

@offtoneverland I would also bring something small for the kids and something small for the parents. Josie had some great inexpensive ideas. If you don’t want to cook something (I wouldnt) you could always just bring a bottle of wine or a veggie and dip tray from the store. Whenever we host and say “don’t bring anything!” People do anyway 

mockingjay1

I agree with PPs advice. Have fun @offtoneverland!

We toured the hospital where we will be delivering today. It was fine, but the lady said she didn't think they did skin to skin immediately with c-section deliveries. I think working and having DS in such an amazing hospital makes every other hospital I've been at seem not so great. I am going to ask my doctor about it when I meet her in a few weeks. If mom and baby are healthy there is no reason it can't be done c-section or not. 

highsteaks

i finally committed to getting everything south of the mountain waxed off this morning. even with 2 tylenol, the pain was really intense. i probably lost a pound from stress sweating.

firsttimespartanmom

@highsteaks I feel your pain. One tip my water told me that I have actually found to work - go regularly. Like every five weeks or so. The more you go, the easier it gets and the less it hurts. I didn’t really believe her and waited until I was like five months along to go again, and it was so ungodly painful - ever since I’ve started an every five week schedule it’s been bearable! 

highsteaks

@firsttimespartanmom yea, i’m definitely glad to have had it done now, so that when i’m 7 then 8mo hopefully it won’t be so bad. i wouldn’t be surprised if waxing for the first time when you’re 9mo sends you right into labor, lol!

booksandcoffee

Baby Boy has been kicking and rolling all day. It’s amazing and makes up for the fact that I can’t sleep more than two hours at a time without getting up to pee or having hip pain. 

I have been calling him “ little bear” or “ baby bear.” We picked up a few things for his nursery today. The kids had so much fun picking them out. 

lifesabeach85

@mockingjay1 whaaaat!?!?! That’s crazy. I hope that was a mistake. 

@highsteaks good for you staying on top of you. I’ve been meaning to book and appt but fall is coming...

booksandcoffee

I’ve been exhausted all day but now that everyone is sleeping and I’m able to sleep, I am wide awake. What gives? 

booksandcoffee

In my J13 group, we had MOTN check ins during the months (years lol) after the babies were born and they were up for feeding or fussing or partying in the middle of the night. It was nice to feel like I wasn’t up alone in the middle of the night while feeding my munchkin. I hope we do that on our board once our babies arrive. 

emjohn517

@booksandcoffee yes I loved MOTN check ins for those first few months! With my previous bmb we switched to Facebook shortly before the babies started to be born. We still have weekly check ins, 3 years later on there. You really do create a community together. 

firsttimespartanmom

@booksandcoffee love the idea of MOTN check ins...I imagine it’ll make it just a little easier knowing someone else is up all night with you. 

Husband has been at a bachelor party all weekend and I spent all day yesterday at home, organizing, cleaning, reading and watching Netflix. It was so delightful, but I slept horribly. Still waiting for him to come home and I realize we are out of decaf coffee. So i decide to make a cup of regular, which I haven’t had since February. Stay tuned on whether baby goes nuts or if DH comes home to an immaculate house with my caffeine-fueled energy. 

booksandcoffee

emjohn517 said:

@booksandcoffee yes I loved MOTN check ins for those first few months! With my previous bmb we switched to Facebook shortly before the babies started to be born. We still have weekly check ins, 3 years later on there. You really do create a community together. 

My J13 Group is still close - we moved to FB- and talk daily. There have even been yearly get togethers- I attended the one closest to my house but haven’t flown to any. Two friends that I see frequently (they live nearby me) and talk to constantly were people I met on J13. They didn’t have a Nov2009 group when my son was born. At that time, the bump had community boards but they were 0-3 month, 3-6, 6-9, etc. I don’t think the BMBs started until 2010 or so. I could have used the support with my first, big time. 

runningyogimama

Both my M13 and M14 groups are VERY active on FB! Honestly, my M13 group is some of my closest friends and biggest supporters at this point. We’ve been through marriage and divorce and death and cancer and then all of the everyday stuff we all still post about. 

mamabee1113

Anyone ever get anything “open box” from Amazon warehouse? The swing I’ve had my eye on just popped up with 3 open box buying options at 50% off the lowest 3rd party seller new price. It says “open box-like new” and further description says it’s in orignal packaging but packaging will be damaged; nothing about the swing itself being damaged or even used. What I’ve been able to find on google is that usually it’s just a damaged box (either damaged in an ‘returned as undeliverable’ situation or the box just got damaged in the warehouse) and nothing is wrong with the product. But real life experience from someone is always more valuable than a google search.

runningyogimama

@rosebud1230 I know I bought a few open box things from amazon for DD2 when she was a baby (I can’t remember what, haha), but it was literally just a damaged box from the manufacturer, nothing wrong with what was inside at all.

mamabee1113

@runningyogimama Awesome! Thank you! The discount is so good, I was hoping that would more than likely be the case. I went ahead and ordered it.. i suppose worst case is it’s more than just the box damaged and I have to return it.

highsteaks

@rosebud1230 i just bought something big for half price that was described as packaging damaged. the package was completely mauled, but the item inside was perfect and works just fine. i’m very happy. also i still think you can return warehouse items if they aren’t as described, so not too much of a gamble.

mamabee1113

@highsteaks Thank you! The description does only mention the packaging will be damaged, so hopefully that is the case and the swing will be fine! Returns are allowed, so I agree that it isn’t much of a gamble. It’ll just be a slight inconvenience if it is more than a busted box.

eahayes

@booksandcoffee would love a FB group and actually keep checking to see if I've missed someone posting about creating one-- my best friend said her FB group was a lifesaver when the baby came and advice was needed!

In other news, I am EXHAUSTED. This is like first tri tiredness all over again

lifesabeach85

So when should we start a FB group? December? Or before all the babies are born?

wildrainbow

I'm not on fb 

pelorunningmama

@rosebud1230 I love warehouse deals! I’ve ordered all sorts of stuff from there.

My Aug ‘16 group is super close too. We check in daily and have lots of fun weekly threads. I’m excited for this group to eventually transfer to fb because it is so much easier for me to keep up on that format. My last group didn’t make the move until after the babies were born and we had a system for letting people in so that a rando couldn’t join. Having the check ins those first few weeks were amazing. 

booksandcoffee

lifesabeach85 said:

So when should we start a FB group? December? Or before all the babies are born?

We waited until after the babies were born for J13- months and months and months after- because there were some people who would join just to be in the group and then creepy lurk without participating which people were nervous about given it’s FB which doesn’t have the same anonymity as this board can. 

booksandcoffee

Baby Boy has hiccups. I love it 

highsteaks

@wildrainbow lovetit for solidarity; i’m not on fb either.

runwmusic

@highsteaks @wildrainbow no fb here either

lurvleybunchococonuts

Another option is to set up a private group on TB so we don't lose our non-FB mommas. Honestly I don't know much about how to set it up or whatnot but I've heard that it's easier to manage, we "admin" it ourselves, easier sticking/unstickying threads, we'd be in charge of who is/isn't invited, safe to share personal deets/pics, etc. I'd hate to lose you guys and think it'd be unfair to ask the non-FB moms to add FB just to be part of the group. 

I have a FB but don't use it much. 

emjohn517

@lurvleybunchococonuts the private buml
group is another great option and totally private! No one can randomly join or search anything from it. 

KellyT22

I'm Team Facebook, so take that as you will. My S15 group started really early (like 8 months before the babies were born). We started my M17 group (I'm an admin) about a month or so before the babies were born. Both groups are very active. M17 is super drama free - we vetted everyone before accepting them into the group to make sure they were actual Bump users who participated in the BMB.  I think FB is just so much easier to use and keep up with. There are ways to keep it safe and standards to eliminate lurkers.

I've been blessed with two amazing groups who are very close. I hope this group becomes a third! I would be happy to assist with admin duties or impart wisdom if anyone wants to start a group, but also don't want to piss anyone off. One of the common fears is that TB will die off when people go to Facebook, but that hasn't been my experience. 

My personal vote on "when" is probably mid-September. It's nice to be settled in before the babies come, do "labor watch" threads, and get to know people. Everyone is so busy when the babies are born. But of course the group could stay open to new members through December or whenever for anyone who preferred to join late.

eahayes

I would be happy with a facebook group also-- I don't know why, it just seems more manageable to me to post items, search within, etc.. probably just because I'm used to it. Bummed that @ftm_jen, @highsteaks, and @wildrainbow don't have fb! You guys are active posters and I always feel like we have similar questions and thoughts!  

lurvleybunchococonuts

KellyT22 said:

*snipped*
I've been blessed with two amazing groups who are very close. I hope this group becomes a third! I would be happy to assist with admin duties or impart wisdom if anyone wants to start a group, but also don't want to piss anyone off. One of the common fears is that TB will die off when people go to Facebook, but that hasn't been my experience. 


Ugh stuck in box...

Agree to disagree. Granted this is my first BMB but lurking some of the other BMBs that have already moved to FB (June '18 is a prime example) they are primarily drive-by oneoffs &/or require a decent sized, dedicated group of ladies that aren't part of FB.

Just want to point out that private TB group or FB group we can decide/make the structure however we want it. Just in case anyone is thinking YAY FB simply because it's less structured/rules. If we want to allow more one-off threads that's cool because it won't be random people we don't "know" asking and then never coming back again. 

Again, personal opinion here but I don't see how FB is any easier to use than TB. They both have their faults IMO.

I'll join a FB group if that's the consensus but would prefer keeping the board as is until babies are born and then moving to a private TB group.

MojieJo

I have FB but basically never use it (ended up having to leave my previous board group because of it, which I'm still disappointed by since it would have been nice to have kept in touch with the ladies from my group since I don't have other moms of similarly aged kids around me, other than DH's cousin, who I don't get along with).

I can get on there even though I hate using FB, but I don't have time to keep up with the format even if I do.

I would also prefer to keep things as they are until the babies are born and then move to a private Bump board.

lifesabeach85

Should we start a poll thread about this?