4 month Sleep Regression

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Help! 

I feel so alone with my LO in the sleep department!

Towards the end of this month my LO will turn 5 months old— As exciting as it is..... in the sleep department, not so much!

Since my LO has been a new born, I feel we haven’t slept for more than 1-2 hour stretches! One night we had a “fluke” night and WE got four hours of sleep. This happened around 3 months of age. But again it was probably a “fluke” since it only happened ONE time! 

All my family and friends are “concerned” for my health (as a mom) getting such little to small stretches of sleep at a time for almost 5 months now! I am starting to get consistent headaches everyday! 

I feel so alone talking to other moms about how their their babies sleep or have slept for three, four, five, six and even seven hour stretches a night! For me that many hours in one stretch are unheard of! I don’t remember what that feels like sleeping that long! 

I have done reseach on sleep training... I have set up a schedule, consistent bed time routines, put him down awake but tired, given my LO dream feeds, pat pat pat techniques, not making eye contact, not playing or conversation, shussshing noises, repeating “it’s sleep time” and still waking up multiple times (2,3,4x) a night! 

I am feeling pretty desperate and would
love any suggestions or help or not feeling so alone in the sleep department! 

From, 

sleep deprived mom 

DDRRT1982

The first thing I think of is your baby might be waking so frequently because he or she is hungry.  Would adding a feeding before you go to bed help?  Maybe he or she is seeking comfort.  Add in a paci to satisfy that sucking reflex.  Second, is your baby sleeping well during the day?  My aunt is a post partum doula and actually says she observes better night time sleep habits when the baby has adequate rest during the day.  Hiring a post partum doula or sleep expert might also be something you want to look into.  If your health is suffering it is time to seek outside help.  

Also, please ask you SO to take one night if possible.  Get some rest and evaluate your options.  I completely understand how you feel and hope it gets better.  

sgrn18

I agree with @DDRRT1982.  We haven't had the best sleeper either and someone had mentioned that adequate naps during the day makes for better rest at night.  That has literally been a game changer, instead of trying to make him happy when he gets fussy, I now know its nap time. If he starts showing signs of being sleepy, I take him in a dim room and rock him or nurse him to sleep (dont care if I'm making bad habits, I need him to sleep and if that's what I've got to do then I'm doing it). If he doesn't show any signs of being tired after 2/ 2.5 hours of being up, I go try to put him to sleep again. So far it works well but he fights it hard sometimes.  We start our bedtime routine at 730 and he is usually asleep by 8 ish, so if he doesnt take a nap in the late afternoon he will have a hellish hour between 6 and 7. 

I've also started to notice that when he wakes up in the middle of the night it's usually not because he is hungry, like @DDRRT1982 said, he wants comfort. I'd give him the boob and he would use me as a pacifier to fall back asleep.  So now I do a quick diaper change and pacifier all in the dark (I'm getting good at the diaper changes in the dark lol)

I've pumped since the beginning because I knew I'd want MH to take some feeds in the middle of the night. He is pretty good about getting up and letting me sleep in (even just an extra hour helps) when he isn't working and it helps me a ton both mentally and physically.

mccurleya

I agree about the good day naps. Also, investing in a weighted sleep sack saved us! He started sleeping through the night on night 2 when before he woke every 3-4 hours. That was a month ago and he's slept though the night every night until this week because of teething. I highly recommend it. We got the nested bean. Just make sure it's the medium size which is for 6+ months and 25+ inches (I'm guessing the inches because I don't remember) or 18+ pounds. 

fatstagnation

We didn't need the weighted sleep sack, but just a regular one helps alot. My little one gets chilly when she sleeps, so making sure she's in footie pj's or a sleep sack to keep her a little warmer helps her sleep longer. Once I figured that out we started getting a lot more rest. 

Also don't go running every time baby wakes up. If they're fussing, they might put themselves back to sleep. Give him a few minutes. pick one of the wake up times and really work on eliminating that one so you get a four hour stretch. Then try to eliminate another so you have two four hour stretches. This felt like a miracle when we got there from the every two hour nights.  Finally, work on the middle wake up to see how long little one can go. 

Good luck!