TTC After a Loss

July WTO

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Re: July WTO

  • Lifting you up right now @bakerstreetboys for successful day 3 transfer! 

    AFM, I go here now. AF finally showed her face today! 
  • @bakerstreetboys everything crossed for a successful transfer!!

    @rowedking6 glad you are put of that limbo!
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  • FX @bakerstreetboys

    @rowedking6 while I hate it showed up for you I’m glad you can move onto a new cycle. 

    Feel better @Kath525
  • chloe97chloe97 member
    edited July 2018
    @Mack2342 I am so sorry. That just sucks. At my annual, my OB/GYN checked my FSH levels to make sure that I wasn't perimenopausal since I am 39 and we are TTC again. Hopefully your RE can just call that in. I do know that perimenopause does not necessarily equal infertile. Perimenopausal women can have takehome babies with no interventions.  It just means your hormones are more of a bitch than normal and it ain't easy (which you know already).

    My 4 best gfs and I are all turning 40 this year and 3 of us are all in varying stages of trying for another. One has unexplained IF and 1 LC by IVF, 1 has had 10 pregnancies and 2 LC, and me with 4 pregnancies and 1 LC. Of course our 4th friend got pregnant at 37 and 39 with no issues whatsoever. We all talk about how much longer do we keep going and when do we "close down shop". I have no idea what the answer is. 

    Another friend of a friend had 3 children- 1 at 37, 1 at 39 and then had 5 MCs and a takehome baby right before her 43rd birthday. I think about her all the time as I ponder this question these days. 
  • @chloe97 I’m 43 now.  I had my only son at 40.  So yeah I constantly question do I continue.  I have pretty much accepted that we will just have my son and we are happy with that but I still haven’t thrown in the towel. 
  • justariusjustarius member
    edited July 2018
    Well I go here again, CD2. Start femara again tomorrow. Major anxiety attack this morning because I work up in a puddle of blood and the only time that’s happened to me was with my MC so that was a major flashback trigger. Sorry if tmi...

    I’m so sorry to all you lovely ladies having the debate of when to stop trying. I can only imagine how hard that is. I hope you feel peaceful about either decision ❤️

    Thinking of you @bakerstreetboys !!!

    edit: cuz words are hard sometimes 
  • @justarius that would have been awful :( I hope your day got better from there.

    At 40, I'm also in the not knowing when to stop camp. If this round of IVF doesn't work out, I'm going to have some serious evaluating to do.


  • @justarius how scary, I'm so sorry. Not a pleasant way to start your day. 

    @bakerstreetboys I really, really hope you don't have to make that decision! 

    This is my second period since the d&c and it's still very bright red with mostly clots. ..I kinda thought most of that would be done. Here we go day 2...have a good day everyone. 
  • Aaand I’m back, cd2 and onto IUI #2. This month starts 2.5 years TTC #1, which I really shouldn’t have calculated. How the heck did it get to this? 

    It’s really bothering me that pg #1 (tw- which happened the first month I tried) may have just gone fine if it wasn’t for the stupid septum. I feel like I missed my one chance. I know it’s probably irrational but I feel so guilty. 
  • @lin0442 I’m sorry you are back here.  I hope IUI 2 works for you.  It’s so hard to not have those what if moments with loss.  I had a strange thing happen with my first loss and swear that if I hadn’t had that issue, pregnancy would’ve fine.  So I kind of understand your thoughts.   Be kind to yourself. Hugs 
  • @lin0442 I think time is weird while trying to convince... it feels so slow and yet it is hard to believe it's been this long already. I have everything crossed for you this month! 
    @Mack2342 Good luck in the the tww!

    AFM, CD 9. Just waiting, waiting, waiting. Hoping clomid kicks into gear this month. Good luck ladies!

  • chloe97chloe97 member
    edited July 2018
    @Mack2342 Great news!
    @lin0442 I am sorry that it's been 2.5 years. That just sucks. Fx this is your month!

    AFM I should be o-ing today or tomorrow. If today, our timing should be -3 -2. Despite the fact that we had decided last month that we would be ready to "stop preventing but not actively time sex" this month (and LBH we all know our cycles- so is it really possible to NTNP?) DH said to me on Saturday "hey are we okay not to use a condom?" I just ignored it because I can't even with him sometimes. I am 39, our time left is short. DD is 1 and if we are doing this, we got no more excuses not to do it. Wanting to be able to drink and not feel pukey on vacation in September is not an excuse to me. Though I will say that if I really was serious about this month, I would be trying again today. So I guess there is a little small part of me okay with holding off for another month. 
  • Officially back here after my anovulatory cycle, started my period last night so today is considered day 1. Nervous to start femara on Wednesday night since I had  so many side effects on the lower dose last month. And I work three days while I'm on it this month so I'm worried it's going to effect my work performance. As longas it works, it'll be worth it. 

    @justarius sorry to see you back here and that sucks about the trigger. I freaked out yesterday when we were playing life and I missed all the baby squares :( you just never know what's going to hit you. 

    @lin0442 sorry about the milestone. We are coming up on two years since we decided to take my IUD out, it's so frustrating to realize how much time has passed. 
  • @Mack2342 Good luck on the TWW! Thanks for the sympathies.
    @Kath525 Here’s hoping the clomid does the trick for you!! Do you have many side effects on it? It seems to vary so much person to person. 
    @chloe97 Thanks, sucks is definitely the right word. I’m sorry YH is being difficult- I think sometimes they just want to make sure they’re on the same page as us or feel like they are giving input and it comes across waaay wrong. 
    @sagems10 Thank you. I hope you don’t hit your milestone, fx for you :heart: It all feels very unfair sometimes, but we just have to accept that and try our best to stay positive (or at least sane lol).

  • @lin0442 other than vivid dreams I've had no side effects, which is nice.
  • *TW birth mentioned* one of my close friends gave birth today. We're going to the hospital tonight to congratulate them. I'm really hoping that holding a newborn baby is going to kick my ovaries into gear and make me ovulate this weekend! Wishful thinking? It's CD 13 today, so come on ovaries get that baby fever and do your thing!
  • @Kath525 Fx that smelling a newborn head gets your ovaries going!
  • @Kath525 woohoo!!  That’s awesome :D Fx this is the start of a successful cycle!
  • @kath525 that’s great
  • @kath525 so exciting! Really hope this means success on all baby related fronts for you!
  • CD1 for me after D&C on July 6.  I didn’t feel like I ovulated this month but we will see what happens in the coming weeks.  Now to figure out my cycles again.  They are usually on the shorter side.  Feeling better about trying again
  • @Kath525 yayyy! I'm so glad you ovulated! 

    CD8 for me today, last day of femara was yesterday. Thankfully this cycle of femara has been lightyears better than last cycle, hardly any side effects, even on the increased dose. Now I start testing for ovulation on Wednesday. Really hoping that this works this cycle! 
  • CD9 for me today. Looks like my estradiol halved from Saturday instead of increasing, so now I’m trying to not flip out about what that may or may not mean. Of course I have to travel fro work from CD16-CD20 this month so if I O late I’ll probably have to miss my IUI and probably be out hooray.

    Dang it.
  • I'm b sorry @lin0442, how frustrating! I hope you get some answers and the rest of the cycle goes smoothly and on time! 

    AFM, CD 11 and first angel baby due date was today. Meh
  • @rowedking6 sorry about EDD.  I had one recently too (7/25).  It’s the 3rd one and I thought it would get easier but it didn’t.  Still sucks and was a very sad day for me.  I hope today is better for you.  Hugs 
  • CD 12 today, starting to get anxiety about ovulating. I'm so scared that I'm not going to ovulate again. Was getting great palpitations last night, hopefully I can stave off a full blown panic attack :( anybody else feel like they have PTSD almost from their journey? 
  • justariusjustarius member
    edited August 2018
    @sagems10 PTSD almost on the daily...had a full blown melt down yesterday :( do something you love to distract yourself if you can, you deserve to treat yourself well and try to be happy! As far as anxiety about whether or not you O - did your doc order any testing for it? Progesterone lvls? Internal u/s to check for a developing dominant follicle? If not you can always ask for those things to ease your mind? I got both on round two of femara and we conceived on round 3. It’s really helps me have faith in the drug working for us again post MC

    edit screwy tagging I swear this app hates me
  • justariusjustarius member
    edited August 2018
    @rowedking6 and @Mack2342 sorry for EDDs good job on making it through them. I hope you were able to just feel all the feels and maybe do something nice for yourselves. I just keep hoping to be KU again before our EDD I don’t know how i’ll survive it otherwise 

    Edit screwy taggings 
  • @justarius we always do a progesterone after the fact to confirm ovulation, which is nice. They did offer an ultrasound last time when I didn't ovulate, but we declined and instead decided just to trigger a new cycle. They didn't offer an ultrasound this month, but I'm sure they would have if I asked.  My husband and I decided to do one more unmonitored round with the increased femara just to see. If this doesn't work, I think we will be going to full cycle monitoring, injectables, and possibly iui... maybe that's part of why I'm so anxious, because if this cycle doesn't work we might be heading to more invasive methods. 
  • @sagems10 fair enough, that’s understandable. My next appt isn’t until Sept and if I’m not KU by then I actually don’t know what the next steps are...but I’m trying to just take it one month at a time...FX this is your month! 
  • @justarius fx for you too! That's something I really need to work on, taking things one month at a time. I'm already looking several months ahead, trying to plan for the millions of "what ifs". Hopefully neither of us will need a plan for next month! 
  • Days away from ovulation and after a long talk with husband last night I’m going to bench myself for this cycle.  Neither one of us feels completely ready to try again after the MMC a month ago.  Part of me just wants to be pregnant again but after 2 back to back MC we both agree that we need to take a breather for at least another month.  Mixed feelings but I’m glad he was able to help make this decision 
  • @denma2015 Same. Missing an opportunity is hard for me, but another loss would be much harder. We are sitting this one out and we'll see how we feel next cycle. Still waiting to ovulate though. Historically, I have an anovulatory cycle after a miscarriage. So we'll see. 
  • @sagems10 and @justarius, wow I was totally gonna Not post because I was like nobody wants to listen to my ptsd rant lol thank you both for being brave enough to share and reminding me that #itsoktonotbeok!! I'm good at telling others that but of course hard on myself. 

    @denma2015 and @ruby696, I commend you for taking some time to be kind to yourself. It can be a hard decision but totally admirable. Be well. 

    Afm, CD 17 and + dollar tree opk with beautiful ewcm! Last month I had +'s on CD 15 and 16 so seems to be on track. It was a quick Lil nooner and probably another tomorrow then I shall head on back over to the TWW. 
    Thanks again @Mack2342 for your kind words. I hope you had an uneventful EDD. 
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