Posting late, but I am 24 weeks now, no appointments until Monday, and still feeling great. Here is my Easter bump photo. I still haven't done one this week
@sarcasticowl Hahahahahahahaha omg I am literally LOL'ing...that is SO awkward I'm cringing for you!
I had the opposite issue with my MIL actually...she told me last week that she wants to take our baby to their weekend house with them after I go back to work because I'll be "too tired from working all week" to want to see or take care of my baby. I tried to kind of laugh it off and I was like "Well I'll be pumping so how will the baby eat?" and she was so dumbfounded because she formula fed DH and his 2 brothers.
@BusinessWife next week's theme should be crazy things parents/IL's have said!
Me: 31 DH: 34 Together Since 5/07, Married 5/13 TTC Since 8/15 3 Cycles Clomid/Ovidrel/TI-11/16, 12/16, 1/17-All Failed Switched RE's 1/17 4 IUIs-2/17 through 6/17-All Failed ER-8/30/17-25 Eggs Retrieved=7 PGS Normal Embyros FET#1 of 1 Embryo-10/3/17-Chemical FET#2 of 2 Embryos-11/16/17-Failed FET#3 of 1 Embryo-12/22/17-BFP! Carter Wright arrived 9/5/18
@halfanewt welcome!! I am dreading allergy season! I will take my iron in the morning with breakfast (unless I am running late and have cereal, then I'll take it with lunch since you're not supposed to take it with calcium) and I take my prenatal at night with dinner. My OB actually recommended a slow release iron pill to help with stomach issues. I took my first one this morning so we'll see how it goes! I did buy some benefiber in case I need it and may as well just start adding that to my nightly routine.
Anyone have any suggestions for sleep? I'm fine falling asleep/staying asleep initially but seem to wake up around 2-2:30am every single morning and am wide awake. I've tried to read, listen to meditation, get up for a little bit, etc. but usually can't fall back asleep for 1-2 hours. Baby girl also thinks that is a perfect time to have a dance party which makes it VERY difficult to fall back asleep. It also doesn't really matter what time I go to bed (I've tried later and earlier bedtimes and still wake up at the same exact time.). Guess this is just preparing me for her being wide awake or hungry when she's here!
@sarzee2 and @BusinessWife YES, we need to do an IL question. I know at least a few of us have tenuous-at-best relationships and there are bound to be some doozies!
@sarcasticowl OMG I would have died! I have a similar relationship to my in-laws (both are VERY religious but in a weird way - they don't celebrate Christmas but exchange presents on Thanksgiving so that'll be interesting to navigate with a little one) and would have no idea how to respond to that book being sent to me! Last Thanksgiving they gave me a bird-watching book with the comment "We realized we don't really know you that well".
@sarzee2 ummm....wouldn't you be looking forward to spending time with your new baby on the weekends once you go back to work? LOL.
I can't wait to see what passive aggressive comments my MIL has to say at my baby shower. Oh the stories I could tell, lol!
LOL @sarcasticowl that is funny, how awkward! I always felt so weird about breastfeeding around my MIL, I would always use a cover even in my living room. My Mom I could care less- she was literally helping me latch when my DS was two days old lmao.
These HDBD pics are all so beautiful! You are rocking the bumps ladies
Me: 28, DH: 30 Married July 2014 DX: Severe MFI- 3 failed IUI's, IVF #1 Egg retrieval June 4th 2016, 5 day transfer- BFP Baby Boy! EDD 2/25/2017. Our sweet miracle Carter Bennett arrived 2/12/2017 6 lbs, 2 oz 19 inches. Surprise BFP!!! Baby Girl due 10/1/2018.
@sarcasticowl and @sarzee2 my MIL always pushed me to use formula with my first. She didn't understand why I would want to breastfeed. When my son was 9 months she asked me to stop because it wasn't good for me and I'm too tired to continue breastfeeding. I continued until he was 14 months and she wasn't happy at all. I think MIL just want you to do exactly what they did for their kids.
@marimarii Definitely true. My DH is an identical twin and his parents didn't know they were having twins until they were born (one was always hiding and they didn't pick up his heartbeat, and this was 1982 before ultrasounds were a thing). She's very proud of the fact that she nursed both of them until 14 months, which yes, is a pretty incredible feat but I'm terrified that if, for some reason, I can't produce enough and have to go on formula that she will somehow judge me in comparison to what she did. Thank God they live five hours away LOL.
omg @sarcasticowl... That is a strange book to just send to someone. I think I might have just not texted back to a text like that. I would've said, sorry didn't receive that one? haha. Looking back to when I was still in communication with my MIL I might have said something like, I'd rather not discuss that. The problem is, they don't get the point and then stop asking or saying things that are too intimate. It is just a constant loosing battle, I wish I had the answer for you. Maybe don't read the book though? That might be a canditate for the 'in-law presents that mysteriously disappeared or were lost pile' haha. I have recently rid myself of all presents from my inlaws that I don't like and was keeping around just to appease them, and it felt great. Another perspective might be,if she is like my mom, she might have seen the book on sale or someone told her about it and so she was just asking quickly before she bought and sent. My mom tends to be terse and comes off aggressive and pushy, but she is just more efficient and doesn't elaborate. My husband is the same way. But still...you don't have a close relationship with her so still just gross and weird.
@sarzee2 hahaha That is such a crazy thing to say!! Like you did all this work to have a baby so you can just work all week and not hang out with it? That is an awesome response- like you know I will be feeding the kid and keeping it alive right?
@mtpbadger - this literally made me Laugh out loud- bird-watching book with the comment "We realized we don't really know you that well". HAHA
why oh why are inlaws so crazy? Why can't they just treat a woman with privacy and respect like you might another lady who you aren't that close with in the world.
My mother in law gave me a mysterious consolation prize mothers day present last year. It was horrible, just claimed she saw it and thought of me? It was an ugly table runner which I have finally just thrown away a few weeks ago. The last thing a woman dealing with IF needs is a fake sort of mother's day present on mother's day? It's like she does. everything. wrong.
@hottietoddy This is actually the 7th or 8th edition of the book; it's been around since the late 50s, and MIL said it helped her when she was nursing. So I'm glad to keep it around for reference when I'm alone and freaked out about something but I prefer to learn about breastfeeding from a real, live lactation consultant. Not that this was meant to replace one, but I know her heart's in the right place. It's just not something that two people with our relationship should really be discussing, I don't think. With my own mom, sure! With my stepmother, who's a nurse? Sure! With a MIL who I can mostly only tolerate? Ehhhhhhhhhhhhh. I don't want to start to make things weird for DH's sake. He is very close to his parents and is glad they finally have an opportunity to be close to a grandchild (their only other grandkids, two boys, were born and raised in Texas and the ILs live in Ohio, so they didn't see a lot of them growing up). For his sake I'll suffer through
@sarcasticowl well that's good if you like the book then you can keep around. maybe it will come in useful. Sounds like she was trying to help, just a weird topic and strange timing. Maybe I'll actually pick up that book too! haha
@sarcasticowl that is a little awkward, but l am sure it came from a place of love. We have to remember that most of our parents didn't have all the answers right at their fingertips. During those first few months I had so many questions and insecurities, I would have lost my mind if I didn't have my phone at my fingertips to google all of my questions on BF, sleep, etc. Perhaps this book was helpful to her or she heard good things about it and wanted to share.
Trust me, if you plan to BF, you are in for lots and lots of mind numbing alone time if your kid is anything like my first. I would start stocking up on good netflix shows to binge and books to read
AFM, my mom was actually trying to talk me out of BF. She brought us up on formula and couldn't understand why on earth I would BF. I was already on the fence before, but she kind of shook me up on it. Come to think of it, I am the first person on her side (aunts, cousins included) of the family to BF since my great grandmother. I still don't understand what the big deal is.
@sarcasticowl that made me laugh SO HARD. My mother in law spent this past weekend telling me every single thing about her birth experiences. If I hear the word placenta one more time.... I want to breast feed but wasn't a breast fed child. I never knew there was so much controversy and opinions about this topic! I had a MALE cousin I barely know ask me if I was going to 'nurse'. There is so much pressure and everyone thinks their way is THE way. I really hope as a mother, I lift people up instead of criticizing or applying my own convictions.
Me: 36 DH: 33
TTC since June 2016
Me: PCOS DH: Morphology 1%
3 TI with Famera and trigger shots-BFN
3 IUI's with Famera and trigger shots- BFN
IVF August 2017 25 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, 13 fertilized (ICSI), 5 frozen, 3 PGS normal
FET November 2017 Transferred one 6 day blast (a little GIRL) BFP EDD 8/4/18
@irisheyes81 Where do people even come up with these questions? My coworker was asked by another coworker (male) if she was going to circumcise her son. REALLY? How about asking about whether you have a name picked out like every other normal person? Why does your brain go THERE first??
I'm back everyone. Thank you for the well wishes I definitely am feeling better and was
even able to drag myself into work today. Also shout out to everyone with the cute bumps!
@hottietoddy thank you for the reassurance. Yeah I guess I just have a guilty nature in
general but I’m trying to not let the occasional Tylenol get me down. I was able to come in today so I can avoid
the whole FMLA thing. Excited your
Anatomy scan is coming up. It can be a
really fun one. I always have anxiety
around the scans and then they are so much fun once I see the heartbeat and see
the baby wiggle. As far as the in-law
drama and showers I would say leave them out of it. If they want to give a gift
or do something for you a-ok but I wouldn’t go out of my way to include them it
sounds like it will just cause more stress on you and you don’t need it. Also on the one child thing. I do not plan to be a one-and-done BUT I am
an old child and both of my parents are only children. Speaking from the kids perspective it’s not
bad. You get all the attention which is
good and a bad thing as you really can't get away with ANYTHING. For me I always
related better to adults than children was the well-behaved/mature one in school.
My parents were very conscientious in the way they raised me to make
sure I didn’t become too indulged/entitled which I never really realized until
I was older that they were so calculated in making sure I wasn’t a spoiled
brat. As far as the myth of the “lonely only
child” that wasn’t the case for me. I
always was in activities, and had few but close friends. The only time I really ever wished for a
sibling was during vacations because beach time/pool time/Disney is just more
fun with other kids. I think if we do
end up with an only the only think I would do is maybe invite a friend or
cousin to come along on the kid-type vacations when we did them. From the adult perspective I do sometimes
wish I had a sibling especially now that my parents are older once my parents
go I really don’t have ANY family but that’s more the result of a lot of only
children in a line. So that can be sad
but at the same time I’ve been lucky enough to have some very long very strong
friendships so I don’t really feel like I won’t always have someone
around. Seems to be pretty common in
other only children I know you sort of pick surrogate siblings and have a few lifelong friends. Anyways
trust your gut and do what’s right for your family. You are mom no matter if you have 1 child or
10!
@marimarii lol, yeah I have resigned myself to pantyliners
until this cough clears up, otherwise I would just be a constant mess
always.
@laurad75 glad the echocardiogram was uneventful. How cute with the peek-a-boo. How is it that these little babies are so
adorable already!
@irisheyes81 YAY to your hubby feeling the baby! I can’t wait to be able to have that moment!
@sarcasticowl sounds like your MIL’s heart was (maybe) in
the right place but her delivery was a little awkward. I also think its odd to ask someone about
breastfeeding. Doctor, doula, partner ok
have the conversation but anyone else I wouldn’t bring it up unless they
did.
OMG @mtbadger the bird watching book made me lol. Such an odd gift that really would only be
liked/used by a small group of people. I
have a stash of candles, wine/liquor gift sets, for when I need a present to go to one of those people I don't really know very well types....I just imagined replacing that shelf with
stacks of bird watching books.
@marimarii wow I have never heard of anyone pushing the
formula. So odd that people get so involved
in this decision it’s none of their business.
I even don’t think partners should have much say in it or at least not
final say. I mean the person doing the
lactating should make the call here.
Me:38 DW:33 TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
Dx: My wife has no sperm and apparently my embryos aren't as good as they look 2016 * April IUI#1 - BFN * June IUI#2 - BFN * July IUI#3 - CP * Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP * November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP 2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal * April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining) * November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal! * November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!! 2018 DD born 8/20/18 20195PGS frosties ( 4 remaining) * September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
@mtpbadger also I have the exact same sleeping problems and have tried all the same things without luck let me know if you find a magic cure. My friend said her OB told her unisom was ok to take but I hate taking anything additional and I feel like at that time of the day I’d just end up being groggy the next day
TTC since May 2013
Mild PCOS, Compound Heterozygous MTHFR No Folic acid/pharmaceuticals/supplements (too many to list- private message me if interested), IVIL infusion
I think I reacted well when I got the book. But DH and I had been married 3-4 years at that point and together for almost 8, if you have no idea what I like (which they do b/c they know I am into puzzles, reading, running, etc.) then ask your son! My parents always ask me what DH is into lately if they don't have any ideas for presents. One year for my bday I got a quilted table runner from my MIL that was blue and brown and my initials stitched in. 1) She got my initials wrong and assumed that I moved my maiden name to my middle name b/c that's what my she did. 2) the colors were hideous and there was a weird bird pattern on it and 3) Why would you give a 30 year old a table runner?
DH and I have had a lot of conversations about boundaries and potential discussions with his parents when this child comes if needed just so he's aware of my viewpoint and I told him mama bear will come out if needed. I told him that if they start celebrating Christmas now after 30+ years just because they feel they are missing out on it with this grandchild or expect us to spend every Thanksgiving with them since they don't celebrate Christmas, that's not going to fly. And there will be a talk with his parents about no religious talk, songs, books, etc around our child as that it our job as her parents to introduce religion how we see fit.
@lablover78 I actually got a decent nights sleep last night and feel 100X better! I'm sure it was because I was just so exhausted but I didn't wake up at 2:30am and it was glorious when my alarm went off and I realized I ha d slept through the night! I'm sure the next few nights will be filled with waking up now though. I really don't want to take anything unless I absolutely have to either. I'm just trying to mentally tell myself this is preparation for all those middle of the night feedings and my body will eventually adjust to running on 4-5 hours of sleep.
I am cackling over here reading all your in law stories! What a trip.
@sarcasticowl Let me know how the book is and whether it helps!
We are in a somewhat similar place...my MIL bf'd my bil for 2.5 years (insane to me) so she has pretty warped ideas about how it's super easy for everyone to breastfeed and is judgy about formula. For instance, we got some free formula samples that I saved in case we need them and she told me to throw them away. First, I would donate to the food pantry before I threw them away (!!), and second, what if we need them???
My mom wasn't able to do much with me or my brother -- she had low supply and latching issues it seems like, but no lactation consultant or anyone to help her -- so she has a much more measured view. I definitely want to try to bf and I'll ask for LC help if needed but if I can't then I can't. I'm not going to let this baby starve. Geez.
@lablover78 My mil compared everything about my daughter to DH. It was so annoying at first, then she started contradicting herself and it got funny instead. She's a good sleeper - oh so was DH. She's having a rough night - oh DH was a horrible sleeper. Literally everything had to be like him.
@persnickity That is hilarious about your mother in law and daughter.
@adirat I wasn't BF'd either and my MIL BF'd all three of her boys for well over a year. My mom has attitude about breast feeding and thinks formula is best. My MIL thinks formula was invented by the devil. I'm screwed either way in the judgment department.
Me: 36 DH: 33
TTC since June 2016
Me: PCOS DH: Morphology 1%
3 TI with Famera and trigger shots-BFN
3 IUI's with Famera and trigger shots- BFN
IVF August 2017 25 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, 13 fertilized (ICSI), 5 frozen, 3 PGS normal
FET November 2017 Transferred one 6 day blast (a little GIRL) BFP EDD 8/4/18
@mtbadger a bird book and a bird table runner? I’m sensing a theme.
@adirat I’m totally with you! Though I plan on breastfeeding I plan on
having a small bit of formula on hand ready to go. You just never know if it will work out so I
rather have done a little research and have something I have I’m comfortable
with in case things don’t work out then having to make a 24hour Walmart trip in
a disappointed starving baby panic.
Me:38 DW:33 TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
Dx: My wife has no sperm and apparently my embryos aren't as good as they look 2016 * April IUI#1 - BFN * June IUI#2 - BFN * July IUI#3 - CP * Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP * November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP 2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal * April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining) * November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal! * November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!! 2018 DD born 8/20/18 20195PGS frosties ( 4 remaining) * September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
@irisheyes81 this was my situation exactly. Luckily my mom isn't the type to make a big deal, but she would always slip in a comment here or there if the opportunity came up... "she would sleep better with formula", etc
@cseley321 is good you didn’t have much pressure and just comments from your mom. I’m sure there are weak moments when any comment is annoying. How long did you breast feed?
Me: 36 DH: 33
TTC since June 2016
Me: PCOS DH: Morphology 1%
3 TI with Famera and trigger shots-BFN
3 IUI's with Famera and trigger shots- BFN
IVF August 2017 25 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, 13 fertilized (ICSI), 5 frozen, 3 PGS normal
FET November 2017 Transferred one 6 day blast (a little GIRL) BFP EDD 8/4/18
@irisheyes81 I stopped at about 14 months. I started weaning at about 12 months and slowly tapered off. I was sooooo ready to be done. I am planning to do the same this time, but I'm not looking forward to it!
Hi guys, I've been having a hard time sleeping too. I wake up at the same time around 2:30 or 3:30am and sometimes I'm up until 6:30 or 7am. I still lay down but don't fall asleep. I've found what can get me to fall back asleep is turn on a fan (or 2). Stretch for a while, eat some nuts to settle my stomach. Drink ice water, I always have water on hand and drink all night but getting fresh ice helps. Or sometimes I'll read some positive affirmations to help ease my anxiety. If I'm sleeping with a blanket on my side, I'll switch to my pregnancy pillow or vice versa. I am up so much my husband has had to sleep in our guest room a couple nights a week to get some rest. I had bad allergies this week and I had to take a Claritin pill because if I let it go I will get a cold and bronchitis quickly. It knocked me out in a few minutes. It was mid day so kinda sucked but man I haven't slept that well in a while. I felt weird though because I kept thinking if I felt this way I wonder what did to baby. But my ob said antihistamines are safe. But they recommend only if you have to so not every day.
Re: 2nd Trimester Check-in | Week of April 2nd
I had the opposite issue with my MIL actually...she told me last week that she wants to take our baby to their weekend house with them after I go back to work because I'll be "too tired from working all week" to want to see or take care of my baby. I tried to kind of laugh it off and I was like "Well I'll be pumping so how will the baby eat?" and she was so dumbfounded because she formula fed DH and his 2 brothers.
@BusinessWife next week's theme should be crazy things parents/IL's have said!
Together Since 5/07, Married 5/13
TTC Since 8/15
3 Cycles Clomid/Ovidrel/TI-11/16, 12/16, 1/17-All Failed
Switched RE's 1/17
4 IUIs-2/17 through 6/17-All Failed
ER-8/30/17-25 Eggs Retrieved=7 PGS Normal Embyros
FET#1 of 1 Embryo-10/3/17-Chemical
FET#2 of 2 Embryos-11/16/17-Failed
FET#3 of 1 Embryo-12/22/17-BFP!
Carter Wright arrived 9/5/18
Anyone have any suggestions for sleep? I'm fine falling asleep/staying asleep initially but seem to wake up around 2-2:30am every single morning and am wide awake. I've tried to read, listen to meditation, get up for a little bit, etc. but usually can't fall back asleep for 1-2 hours. Baby girl also thinks that is a perfect time to have a dance party which makes it VERY difficult to fall back asleep. It also doesn't really matter what time I go to bed (I've tried later and earlier bedtimes and still wake up at the same exact time.). Guess this is just preparing me for her being wide awake or hungry when she's here!
@sarzee2 ummm....wouldn't you be looking forward to spending time with your new baby on the weekends once you go back to work? LOL.
I can't wait to see what passive aggressive comments my MIL has to say at my baby shower. Oh the stories I could tell, lol!
These HDBD pics are all so beautiful! You are rocking the bumps ladies
@mtpbadger - this literally made me Laugh out loud- bird-watching book with the comment "We realized we don't really know you that well". HAHA
why oh why are inlaws so crazy? Why can't they just treat a woman with privacy and respect like you might another lady who you aren't that close with in the world.
My mother in law gave me a mysterious consolation prize mothers day present last year. It was horrible, just claimed she saw it and thought of me? It was an ugly table runner which I have finally just thrown away a few weeks ago. The last thing a woman dealing with IF needs is a fake sort of mother's day present on mother's day? It's like she does. everything. wrong.
Everyone's bumps look so cute!
Trust me, if you plan to BF, you are in for lots and lots of mind numbing alone time if your kid is anything like my first. I would start stocking up on good netflix shows to binge and books to read
AFM, my mom was actually trying to talk me out of BF. She brought us up on formula and couldn't understand why on earth I would BF. I was already on the fence before, but she kind of shook me up on it. Come to think of it, I am the first person on her side (aunts, cousins included) of the family to BF since my great grandmother. I still don't understand what the big deal is.
I want to breast feed but wasn't a breast fed child. I never knew there was so much controversy and opinions about this topic! I had a MALE cousin I barely know ask me if I was going to 'nurse'. There is so much pressure and everyone thinks their way is THE way. I really hope as a mother, I lift people up instead of criticizing or applying my own convictions.
I'm back everyone. Thank you for the well wishes I definitely am feeling better and was even able to drag myself into work today. Also shout out to everyone with the cute bumps!
@hottietoddy thank you for the reassurance. Yeah I guess I just have a guilty nature in general but I’m trying to not let the occasional Tylenol get me down. I was able to come in today so I can avoid the whole FMLA thing. Excited your Anatomy scan is coming up. It can be a really fun one. I always have anxiety around the scans and then they are so much fun once I see the heartbeat and see the baby wiggle. As far as the in-law drama and showers I would say leave them out of it. If they want to give a gift or do something for you a-ok but I wouldn’t go out of my way to include them it sounds like it will just cause more stress on you and you don’t need it. Also on the one child thing. I do not plan to be a one-and-done BUT I am an old child and both of my parents are only children. Speaking from the kids perspective it’s not bad. You get all the attention which is good and a bad thing as you really can't get away with ANYTHING. For me I always related better to adults than children was the well-behaved/mature one in school. My parents were very conscientious in the way they raised me to make sure I didn’t become too indulged/entitled which I never really realized until I was older that they were so calculated in making sure I wasn’t a spoiled brat. As far as the myth of the “lonely only child” that wasn’t the case for me. I always was in activities, and had few but close friends. The only time I really ever wished for a sibling was during vacations because beach time/pool time/Disney is just more fun with other kids. I think if we do end up with an only the only think I would do is maybe invite a friend or cousin to come along on the kid-type vacations when we did them. From the adult perspective I do sometimes wish I had a sibling especially now that my parents are older once my parents go I really don’t have ANY family but that’s more the result of a lot of only children in a line. So that can be sad but at the same time I’ve been lucky enough to have some very long very strong friendships so I don’t really feel like I won’t always have someone around. Seems to be pretty common in other only children I know you sort of pick surrogate siblings and have a few lifelong friends. Anyways trust your gut and do what’s right for your family. You are mom no matter if you have 1 child or 10!
@marimarii lol, yeah I have resigned myself to pantyliners until this cough clears up, otherwise I would just be a constant mess always.
@laurad75 glad the echocardiogram was uneventful. How cute with the peek-a-boo. How is it that these little babies are so adorable already!
@irisheyes81 YAY to your hubby feeling the baby! I can’t wait to be able to have that moment!
WELCOME @halfanewt!
@sarcasticowl sounds like your MIL’s heart was (maybe) in the right place but her delivery was a little awkward. I also think its odd to ask someone about breastfeeding. Doctor, doula, partner ok have the conversation but anyone else I wouldn’t bring it up unless they did.
OMG @mtbadger the bird watching book made me lol. Such an odd gift that really would only be liked/used by a small group of people. I have a stash of candles, wine/liquor gift sets, for when I need a present to go to one of those people I don't really know very well types....I just imagined replacing that shelf with stacks of bird watching books.
@marimarii wow I have never heard of anyone pushing the formula. So odd that people get so involved in this decision it’s none of their business. I even don’t think partners should have much say in it or at least not final say. I mean the person doing the lactating should make the call here.
TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
2016
* April IUI#1 - BFN
* June IUI#2 - BFN
* July IUI#3 - CP
* Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP
* November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP
2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal
* April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining)
* November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal!
* November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!!
2018 DD born 8/20/18
2019 5PGS frosties ( 4 remaining)
* September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
My MIL texted me to tell me our baby’s head (on u/s) looks exactly like my husband’s did when he was born. Haha, ok.
No Folic acid/pharmaceuticals/supplements (too many to list- private message me if interested), IVIL infusion
No Folic acid/pharmaceuticals/supplements (too many to list- private message me if interested), IVIL infusion
DH and I have had a lot of conversations about boundaries and potential discussions with his parents when this child comes if needed just so he's aware of my viewpoint and I told him mama bear will come out if needed. I told him that if they start celebrating Christmas now after 30+ years just because they feel they are missing out on it with this grandchild or expect us to spend every Thanksgiving with them since they don't celebrate Christmas, that's not going to fly. And there will be a talk with his parents about no religious talk, songs, books, etc around our child as that it our job as her parents to introduce religion how we see fit.
@lablover78 I actually got a decent nights sleep last night and feel 100X better! I'm sure it was because I was just so exhausted but I didn't wake up at 2:30am and it was glorious when my alarm went off and I realized I ha d slept through the night! I'm sure the next few nights will be filled with waking up now though. I really don't want to take anything unless I absolutely have to either. I'm just trying to mentally tell myself this is preparation for all those middle of the night feedings and my body will eventually adjust to running on 4-5 hours of sleep.
@sarcasticowl Let me know how the book is and whether it helps!
We are in a somewhat similar place...my MIL bf'd my bil for 2.5 years (insane to me) so she has pretty warped ideas about how it's super easy for everyone to breastfeed and is judgy about formula. For instance, we got some free formula samples that I saved in case we need them and she told me to throw them away. First, I would donate to the food pantry before I threw them away (!!), and second, what if we need them???
My mom wasn't able to do much with me or my brother -- she had low supply and latching issues it seems like, but no lactation consultant or anyone to help her -- so she has a much more measured view. I definitely want to try to bf and I'll ask for LC help if needed but if I can't then I can't. I'm not going to let this baby starve. Geez.
@adirat I wasn't BF'd either and my MIL BF'd all three of her boys for well over a year. My mom has attitude about breast feeding and thinks formula is best. My MIL thinks formula was invented by the devil. I'm screwed either way in the judgment department.
@mtbadger a bird book and a bird table runner? I’m sensing a theme.
@adirat I’m totally with you! Though I plan on breastfeeding I plan on having a small bit of formula on hand ready to go. You just never know if it will work out so I rather have done a little research and have something I have I’m comfortable with in case things don’t work out then having to make a 24hour Walmart trip in a disappointed starving baby panic.
TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
2016
* April IUI#1 - BFN
* June IUI#2 - BFN
* July IUI#3 - CP
* Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP
* November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP
2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal
* April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining)
* November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal!
* November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!!
2018 DD born 8/20/18
2019 5PGS frosties ( 4 remaining)
* September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
@2momshoping So true, I hadn't even thought of having to do it in the middle of the night!
I've been having a hard time sleeping too. I wake up at the same time around 2:30 or 3:30am and sometimes I'm up until 6:30 or 7am. I still lay down but don't fall asleep. I've found what can get me to fall back asleep is turn on a fan (or 2). Stretch for a while, eat some nuts to settle my stomach. Drink ice water, I always have water on hand and drink all night but getting fresh ice helps. Or sometimes I'll read some positive affirmations to help ease my anxiety. If I'm sleeping with a blanket on my side, I'll switch to my pregnancy pillow or vice versa. I am up so much my husband has had to sleep in our guest room a couple nights a week to get some rest. I had bad allergies this week and I had to take a Claritin pill because if I let it go I will get a cold and bronchitis quickly. It knocked me out in a few minutes. It was mid day so kinda sucked but man I haven't slept that well in a while. I felt weird though because I kept thinking if I felt this way I wonder what did to baby. But my ob said antihistamines are safe. But they recommend only if you have to so not every day.