@ashtuesday I do it all the time. I got the stupidly expensive glass file with the giraffe on it and I remember thinking “this thing couldn’t possibly be worth it”, but it totally is. I wait till they pass out after eating and do it before I put them down.
Speaking of BC, I’m so torn. We said this was our last but it seems so sad to close this chapter of never going going through this whole experience again. I’m so torn on what to do.
@mmom3 I am right there with you. Due to my awesome death scare my doctor won't do a tube litigation and so we discussed MH getting snipped but now I can't bring myself to commit to being done.
@mmom3 and @sassypants2010 I am in the same boat. I told DH I was done after Declan was born but that was in the pain of the moment,now I am not sure. He is looking into getting snipped and I am not sure. I keep thinking about adopting though, we have always talked about it. I don’t know...
DH and I are also unsure if we want more children or not. So I decided to go with a long-term BC until we make the decision! Once we decide we’re done DH is going to get snipped.
How many kids do y’all all have already? Those with 3 how hard is it? We now have two girls and I’m terrified of having a third girl, but, we want 3 kids.
After this month I have realized I might have just met my limit in the amount I can handle. I didn't get my tubes tied even though I thought I would because something in me says one more, but logically I don't think I can handle this many tiny guys at once again. Samantha is an excellent baby, but it's having a newborn combined with the toddlers. I am going to talk to my OB about permanent solutions. I am afraid the amnesia of this time will set in and I will get weak and think I can handle more than I truly can. This is the only reason I am considering permanent solutions right now. My husband wants another one, so we aren't on the same page right now, but he doesn't do everything I do.
@slr1229 I have five. Honestly, adding my third little (technically fourth, but my oldest is way older) wasn't so bad, but that has to do with the personalities of my two older toddlers. They were easy. This time my youngest toddler is a bit more free spirited and needs way more attention and supervision. I think it would be way easier to add another if they are little older and little more self sufficient.
@DDRRT1982 I am the youngest of five but my siblings were older, closest one to me was 6 years old when I was born but now that we’re older we are super close (well all but oldest boy- 14 year difference). I love having a big family so I know your kids will appreciate everything you have done one day! Keep up the good work!
Thanks! The bond that my three younger ones have is amazing and I wouldn't have it any other way. If I wasn't already older and could put three or four years in between Samantha and the next I would do it. My age combined with the fact I will eventually need to return to work full time makes the timing limited. I am conflicted. Fortunately, nothing needs to be decided right now. We'll see.
@slr1229 this is my third. I have a 9 year old boy, an almost 5 year old girl, and now Declan is 2.5 weeks. It hasn’t been too hard yet but I have lots of help from my older two.
We have a 7 yo daughter, a 3 year old son, and baby Charlie (3 weeks). Since I am mostly by self and my son is a wild child I may be at my limit. Charlie has been my easiest baby thus far, but it’s hard to make that decision. While pregnant I was certain this was the last, now I’m torn on closing the chapter. There’s something so amazing about the whole experience despite the pain, worries, and fears. I can’t do hormonal BC pills and never had an IUD. My last OB I had for years discouraged their use and would not insert. My 6 week appointment is in a few weeks and my OB said we’ll discuss BC options at that point. After my son - I used the fertility awareness method tracking cycles which were regular. It worked well for 2.5 years randomly I must have had a very late ovulation and thus baby #3 came on board.
Omg it’s been like 2 weeks and Emma is NOT improving. She’s so congested she can hardly breathe and her drainage is choking her and making her spit up all night. I’m getting zero sleep and DS isn’t napping so neither am I. She’s fine during the day, at least?? But night time is a nightmare. I’m so ready for her to be better now and I’m sure she is too!
@BrittnieMariee same here. My babe sounds like he has mucus stuck in his throat and makes noises that make me scared and sad. Dr says its normal and will pass...I'm reading other chat rooms and they say its normal too. Only happens at night.
I bought Hydrasense spray for baby and used it yesterday morning. I felt bad to use it again tonight but now regret it. Will try again in the AM and follow through at night. Its supposed to help with colds but also for blocked airway from dust etc...so I want to give it a shot.
My guy isn't spitting up. I wonder if that helps your babe clear it up? All the best with the rest of the night mama.
I am so sorry. I really hope it improves. I would contact the doctor. Could it be reflux? Samantha gets congested at night too and I half wonder if it's bc it's the only time she is laying flat and the milk could gravitate up to her nose when she spits up. During the day she is held or in the rocknplay.
@nancysimp ugh I hope these kids get better soon! I am so exhausted. I’ve been trying to clear her nose with a nose frida and I get a bit of snot, but not much. It does seem to help though!
@DDRRT1982 It’s definitely from her cold. She was doing so well at night. I hear her struggling to breathe, then she starts choking on the drainage, and that’s when she gags and spits up at night she’s laying flatter than she does during the day (because I usually hold her most of the day so she’s upright against my chest) I guess that could be contributing to it.
I used nose frida this am. Got some mucus out. Yes, laying flat is what makes him struggle with mucus in his throat. I placed a thin blanket under the bassinet mattress near his head to elevate his head a tiny bit last night....but when he cried for milk 2 hours later, he was lying far from where I placed him so I removed it. BUT I can tell you that he slept nicely for 2 hours with a bit of an incline. Ugh...just want this to go away.
I too am struggling with the "should there be one more" issue. It took us ~1.5 years to get these guys. I was 32 when we started TTC, and now I'm going to be 35 in 6 weeks and MH is turning 38. So I feel if we don't do it relatively soon the door will close. On the other hand, my body is wrecked from the twin pregnancy and traumatic birth. And 18 months plus would be ideal to heal. But then I'd be at least 37 and MH would be at least 40 at the time of birth. Not to mention having 2 toddler boys when handling a newborn, wanting to give them attention, and not really wanting to go through IF treatment again. There doesn't seem to be a satisfying answer either way!
@vflux33 & @DDRRT1982 - yes I know! My DH is 8 years older then me so he feels he’s too old to have more. Ideally If we did try for a 4th I’d like to wait until Charlie was 2.5-3 which would put me nearing 40.
We were on the fence after having DD1 if we wanted another. We had chosen the nexplanon BC after talking about my options extensively with my OB (I have a history of migraines which makes any form of BC difficult). Ultimately the topic returned when we discovered the hormones in the implant began messing with my migraines after less than 2 years in. We did decide to start TTC for DD2 upon getting the implant removed but also decided at that point that DD2 would be our last. It was a practical decision- we wanted to make it while there weren’t crazy hormones coursing through my body. I had pree with DD1 so I knew I’d automatically be high risk, which was a big factor. But it was mostly a financial decision. We’re a two working parent household mostly by choice- yes, I could give up my career and become a SAHM but in reality that would mean going back down to only one vehicle (our city doesn’t have very good public transportation) and realistically DH would have to work so much that he’d never get a chance to return to school. Plus I do love what I do and really feel like we’re able to give our girls a better life with a dual income household. I’ve gotten lots of flack from my MIL and even strangers about our decision to make this our last child (I’m still relatively young in my late twenties) but it’s the right decision for our family.
it’s just you and your partner’s decision- but also remember that it’s you who has to be the one to carry the child and handle all the hormones, emotions, and possible complications throughout the entire pregnancy and post partum period.
38 yr old ftm here, 39 in July. We want a second...I think I'd try when my DS is 1 and let's say we get pregnant right away...I will be 40 having my second. It is a bit scary re risks but will stay positive for a healthy babe. I want my DS to have a sibling. I do have a couple of friends who were 40 as well for their second. This is life and the timing of mine! I don't feel old, and yes I do think about the future and the age gap...but I have a positive outlook and think in the present. My father was 40 when my parents had me...he is turning 80 this year.
I know we want at least one more. Possibly two. It takes me a while to get pregnant so we will probably start trying when Sam turns 1. We also want to adopt and I just heard that the local hospitals had twenty babies with no one to foster/foster to adopt in one day. That just broke my heart.
Honestly, this time around, with already being on meds to handle my PPA, I feel much better equipped to handle the newborn stage plus a toddler. I’m sure we will still have our moments and days, but I am glad that I get to enjoy both of my boys. I regret waiting so long to ask for help with my first.
Yeah, definitely depends on your situation. I think other people having babies later is great! I'm not sure I want to in my 40s personally. If there's a lot of longevity in your genetics that definitely helps (not so much in my family). Plus not having fertility issues also helps... Relying on definitely being able to have a baby later is tricky from the standpoint of someone with a history of infertility because the odds of it happening easily do go down. We had a relatively easy go with IF getting pregnant with our first medicated IUI, but people who need IVF have it pretty rough from what I can tell and I know the longer I wait the more likely I'd need IVF. But if that wasn't a factor for me and all my grandparents lived to be 100, different story!
Re: New Mom check-in 3/16
@slr1229 I have five. Honestly, adding my third little (technically fourth, but my oldest is way older) wasn't so bad, but that has to do with the personalities of my two older toddlers. They were easy. This time my youngest toddler is a bit more free spirited and needs way more attention and supervision. I think it would be way easier to add another if they are little older and little more self sufficient.
I bought Hydrasense spray for baby and used it yesterday morning. I felt bad to use it again tonight but now regret it. Will try again in the AM and follow through at night. Its supposed to help with colds but also for blocked airway from dust etc...so I want to give it a shot.
My guy isn't spitting up. I wonder if that helps your babe clear it up? All the best with the rest of the night mama.
@DDRRT1982 It’s definitely from her cold. She was doing so well at night. I hear her struggling to breathe, then she starts choking on the drainage, and that’s when she gags and spits up
I used nose frida this am. Got some mucus out. Yes, laying flat is what makes him struggle with mucus in his throat.
it’s just you and your partner’s decision- but also remember that it’s you who has to be the one to carry the child and handle all the hormones, emotions, and possible complications throughout the entire pregnancy and post partum period.
Honestly, this time around, with already being on meds to handle my PPA, I feel much better equipped to handle the newborn stage plus a toddler. I’m sure we will still have our moments and days, but I am glad that I get to enjoy both of my boys. I regret waiting so long to ask for help with my first.