TTCAL week of 3/5 - Page 2 — The Bump
TTC After a Loss

TTCAL week of 3/5


Re: TTCAL week of 3/5

  • @GeorgiaGirl1230 Welcome to the group and sorry for your loss.  My bleeding kind of came and went for about a month after my D&C.  I hope yours stops soon.
  • edited March 2018
    1- Not new, but haven’t posted in awhile. CP in November 2017, no luck since. 
    2- Status: Somewhere around ovulation right now. I don’t chart so don’t really know.
    3- Rant: (Mostly the reason I returned here) So I’ve now been TTC for 9 months with the CP in the middle of it all, so I’m getting pretty hopeless. I went to the Gyn for a little pep talk and maybe to see if there’s anything wrong, but he said, in so many words, to keep trying. I kind of expected that response, but it was still frustrating to hear. On top of that, my sister hasn’t also been TTC and just found out she’s pregnant, so of course is texting me nonstop because she’s worried about viability and all since she also has a history of m/c, but I just can’t handle it at the moment. Add to that some discussion of adding grandchildren to the family by my MIL (with the best of intentions and no harm meant by her). I just am so tired of trying and failing and now knowing that I need to wait until November in order to have any intervention... it just is difficult. The doctor did say at my age that chances are 1 in 6 each month, and this is 6 cycles since the miscarriage, so statistically, I guess I should be ok, right?
    Rave: DH and I just celebrated our 4th anniversary and DD turns 3 at the end of the month, so March is generally a nice month of celebration and keeping busy. We also are getting solar panels installed soon so that is exciting. 
    4- Dream pet: In reality, I do not want a pet because they are way too much work right now (mostly because DH would not want to contribute). But in some fantasy world where my pet would be cared for and loved, I would want a Miniature Australian Shepherd. Maybe when DD can help take care of him/her. 

    * Edit: it deleted part of my post the first time
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  • @AGPigwidgeon06 that sounds very frustrating. She's your sister, so maybe if you tell her how you feel she will give you some space?

    But yey for solar panels! We got ours installed about 2yrs ago and I'm happy we did. Of course I'm in MA and we really only have so many months of sun.....but if your somewhere thats usually sunny, you'll probably love them more!
  • 1. My name’s Amy. I’m 31, going through what has probably been the best and worst year of my life. 

    2. Started TTC 6/22/17. CP 01/07/18. Baby stopped developing at 7 weeks. NMC 02/16/18. First pregnancy, first loss.  

    3. Rant: I hate hate HATE that people who don’t even want kids, or who aren’t even trying to have kids, or who probably shouldn’t have kids seem to get pregnant with NO problem. Yet after 6 months of TTC, we finally gout our happy positive pregnant test...only to be completely deflated 9 weeks later. My good friend is into her second trimester of her second pregnancy (she was 12 weeks when I found out I was pregnant) and I can barely bring myself to talk to her. My 17 year old cousin is going forward with an unplanned pregnancy. They’re both having girls. Yay for them. Fml.

    4. I’ve got a neurotic, happy puppy napping a few feet away - gorgeous Rottweiler/Retriever mix, and she is simultaneously a huge comfort and pain in my ass lol.
  • @AGPigwidgeon06 I'm so sorry for your loss. This process is filled with waiting and its so hard. We all get it. You're not alone. My sister is pregnant too. It's all hard.
    @AmyAngela I'm so sorry for your loss. This isn't a club anyone wants to be in but It's filled with some fabulous people. I hope your stay here is short.
  • *TW (not my) pregnancy mentioned * I posted a couple weeks back that my single-living-at-home-with-parents-estranged-sister found out she was pregnant. Welllllllll... She texted me an ultrasound pic today that she's having TWINS. I'm sure you can imagine my thought process and emotions. I'm in month 15 ttc with 2 mcs... She gets accidentally knocked up with twins. Joy.
  • @AmyAngela sorry for your loss. It can be so upsetting when people achieve so easily something they don't seem to desire. After we found out at our US, we were in the OBs waiting room and there were several very pregnant women in the waiting room who could barely put effort into getting dressed decently (seriously, slippers and dirty clothes) discussing happy things. While h and I sat there dressed for our office jobs and tears streaming down my face. 

    @Kath525 I would have been so many thoughts. Wow. 
  • @AGPigwidgeon06 I’m sorry for your loss. That one year mark that Gyn’s give is so frustrating. I mean I get it, but all this waiting is so hard! I hope your stay here is short but there is a lot of great support here too! 

    @AmyAngela I’m sorry for you’re loss. It’s definitely so hard to continue to see those around you get pregnant month after month! Hopefully it will be our turn soon! 

    @Kath525 wow that’s incredibly hard! I’m so sorry you’re dealing with that on top of everything else you have going on. 
  • @AGPigwidgeon06... first, I’m so sorry for your loss... and add me to the pregnant sister club.  We’ve basically been benched for one reason after another since my MMC last September with one BFN thrown in and a crisis/crap show with our home to boot (like move out and gut the place but that’s a whole other story.). My sister had an ectopic in December and was pregnant again before she even had a period about three weeks later.  She’s 9 wks now and has seen heartbeat.  @Kath525 I am with you on all the frustrations... she actually told me in my (understandable I think) depressed state at dinner last weekend that she wasn’t “going to let me rain on her parade.”  Like, I’m so sorry it’s hard for you that my life is throwing a dark cloud into this... try being on MY side of it, I’ll trade!  Went shopping and found my mom in the baby section buying outfits... I just can’t.  We were pregnant first and thought we would have the first grandchild and now we’re about three weeks out from watching the world congratulate my parents while we’ve twiddled thumbs for half a year.  I’m dreading it.  

    @AmyAngela Welcome and I’m so sorry for your loss.  It is the hardest thing to watch people get what you want seemingly effortlessly while you struggle.  I get it. 
  • @AGPigwidgeon06 so sorry for your loss

    @AmyAngela so sorry for your loss

    @Kath525 so unfair.  I’m sorry
  • AGPigwidgeon06 Sorry about your sister. I’m sure like you said that she’s just concerned and wants to share it with you since you can relate, but it can be very difficult to hear when you’re having a rough time yourself. As for the timeline, you really haven’t been trying that long in the scheme of things. I know it can be frustrating and feel like forever, but it can take a couple with no problems up to a year to get PG. IF only counts after that year (6 months if you’re AMA). And actually, that timeline restarts with each PG you have, and MC count as a PG. So, you’re really only like 4 months in, and any benched cycles (if you sat out the first one or two after the CP) don’t count in that timeline either. I know you are frustrated, but you have to stop forcing yourself to the timeline you’re on. The best you can do is keep trying, and if you reach the IF stage, or end up with more MCs, then seek the testing you need at that point. Honestly, 9 months total TFAS with 1 CP is not that much time in the long run, even though I'm sure it feels like forever to you.

    Kath525 I so totally despise your estranged sister and want to punch her in the face right now. Maybe she’ll decide at the last minute she doesn’t want them and you can take one and I’ll take one?  *sigh*  I hate people.

  • @dpjennifer yessss! I actually had a dream last night that the dr's realized she had stolen one of the babies from my womb and so they gave one to me. I'm sure there's alllll kinds of ways to analyize that dream haha.
    @ccvslp oh man. I'm sorry you had that experience! That's so hard! Sometimes things just aren't fair!
  • Kath525 LOL. I think the dream analysis is real! Also, I don't know where you live but I'd be totally willing to travel regularly so the twins can get to know each other and spend time together and share in each other's lives!  :)
  • 1. Introduce yourself (if new) - loss at 9 weeks in Nov due to an ectopic.  Left tube was removed @ 9 weeks. The whole experience was pretty devastating.
    2. Status? Waiting for AF to leave. WTO
    3. Rant/Rave: I'm pretty sad right now.  I just hit 7 months of ttc. For some reason that number really bothers me.  I know it's nothing compared to what other people have waited but it's starting to feel real that it might take a really long time to conceive now that I'm missing a tube.  It didn't feel so bad the last six months but now I'm heading closer and closer to the 1 year mark.  I'm really pissed I'm missing a tube and feeling pretty hopeless at the moment.  I have this empty bedroom that I'm hoping to one day turn into a nursery. Every time I bring boxes into the house to unpack I have to mentally decide if they should be stored in that bedroom or not. I know it sounds stupid but I'm feeling like I'll never have a child.  I should be due in June.  It makes me so incredibly sad. 
    4. GTKY: What is your dream pet?
    Bernese Mt dog.  They are so pretty and fluffy. 

    @Kath525 - my love tit's was hugs. My stomach dropped reading that.  Life seems so unfair sometimes

  • Thanks @galactickates and I'm sorry you're feeling down. It really freaking sucks you're down a tube. I have my fingers crossed for you. It's been 7 months since my last mc and each month feels longer. So i understand what you're saying. Here's to hoping there will be no more waiting for us soon!
  • @galactickates.... SO... my sister lost HER left tube to ectopic at the end of December.  She was pregnant again before she even had her period and is now ten weeks... I have no idea if this is really true because it sounds insane, but her doc said the other tube can actually pick up the egg even if you ovulate from the side without one... it’s way less efficient but can happen.  I so understand the frustration of going months and months and having that due date approach and you still aren’t pregnant again... just wanted to pass on a little hope maybe? 
  • @galactickates I'm so sorry. It must be insanely frustrating to be down that tube. I totally get that 1 year mark stress. Each passing month is more and more stress. You'll get there and it will be all that much sweeter when you do :heart:
  • Thank you for the love ladies  <3@ccvslp - I appreciate the hope.  I know normally those kinds of stories don't help people,  but when you are down one tube hearing success stories really does encourage me.  I need every success story I can get to give me hope, because it's a pretty hopeless place to be in and super easy to discouraged. 
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