March TWW

tosh24

@cassafrass15 Congrats on the BFP!!! FX for a great beta. Lots of sticky vibes being sent your way! 

ccvslp

Congrats @cassafrass15!  I’m sure you are mentally all over the place and it’s so normal and understandable.  Fingers are crossed reaaaally hard for you! 

lin0442

@cassafrass15 FX for you!!!

bakerstreetboys

Nice to see some BFPs on here

I'm 10DPO if I even O'd at all, which I have been doubting.  POAS this morning and it was stark white.  Even after I fished it out of the garbage an hour later.  Imagine.  Temp was below cover line already this morning.  I know 10DPO is early, but I'm 99% sure I'm out this month.  It would have been expecting a lot to catch a good egg on the first month trying after D&C, but I'm more bummed than I expected to be.  The cramps and the giant dump of snow yesterday aren't helping.  Now I'm even more anxious for our first visit with the fertility clinic.  Come on April 9th.

Mack2342

BFN for me this morning. Stopping progesterone this evening so I expect AF to be here anytime now.  

kikimi83

Aw sorry @bakerstreetboys and @Mack2342. I fish them out of the garbage too! Just in case, right? I was so unsure about that first cycle too, still not sure I ov'd. But it so disappointing. There was this thinking happening, well I'm just going to get pregnant right away and it's going to make everything better. And then I didn't. It sucks. BFN's suck. Do something nice today. 

dpjennifer

Mack2342 Sorry for the BFN. I think I'm right behind you. *sigh* Temp dipped back down this morning, although not below the cover line yet. But a huge wave of spotting. So pretty certain I'll be out this cycle. It's too late for implantation spotting, and the temp dipping is not a good sign for me, so I'm gearing up for AF now. All I can think is, another busted cycle. I'm so sick of being on this roller coaster.

Mack2342

@kikimi83 thanks.  After my first loss I thought i would get KU right away too but it took about 9 months.  Now I try not to expect too much since we have reached 2 yrs of TTC for our 2nd. 

Kath525

Lurking from WTO* @Mack2342 @dpjennifer so sorry for the temp dips and BFN, ladies. Enjoy some wine? Eat all the chocolate? 

rowedking6

@cassafrass15 BFCongratulations!!! 

rowedking6

@Mack2342 ((hugs)) 

tosh24

@mack2342 @dpjennifer @bakerstreetboys sorry for the BFNs ladies. It sucks. 

7dp5dt today (equivalent of 12dpo) and BFN for me. Beta is Saturday but at this point, I'm not holding my breath. 6 years of BFNs and loss is really getting to me. I know I have 8 embryos left but I don't know that I can go through that many transfers and stay sane. I'm emotionally exhausted. I wish we had the money for a surrogate so I could just retire my body. Doesn't seem to want to do what it's supposed to anyway. 

dpjennifer

tosh24 Sorry. The years and years of dealing with TTC (and in your case IF), plus loss is just way too much for a person to have to bear. My sister mentioned maybe being a surrogate for me, which at this point if DH were to get on board and we could afford it, I would probably be all for. The emotional and physical toll this whole process takes on a body is ridiculous! I really hope you have a successful cycle with one of your embies sooner rather than later so you can stay more sane! I get it though... over 3 years of this journey and all I've got are 4 losses, fat, and turned into an emotional psychopath. Sucks.

Mack2342

@tosh24 sorry for the BFN.  It totally sucks.  I’m still hoping it’s too early for you.  

@dpjennifer would surrogacy be that expensive since it’s your sister?    I need an egg donor.  My sisters are older so they can’t give me any. I do have a 20 something niece that just had a baby.  I think I would take her eggs if she offered 

dpjennifer

Mack2342  Not sure. We haven't looked into it that much yet. My sister hasn't tried to have kids yet, and is probably more than a year away from trying. And they want to have one themselves and make sure everything goes fine before she'd be a surrogate. So, it would be a long ways away. 

Kath525

@tosh24 ugh! I'm so sorry. I have been holding my breath for you. FX the next FET is your take home baby. This all sucks. I hope you take some time to pamper yourself a little. You sure as heck deserve it.
@dpjennifer it sounds like you have a pretty great sister. I'm glad you have that support!

Mack2342

@dpjennifer that’s awfully nice of her to offer.  Hopefully you don’t need it! 

ccvslp

@Mack2342, @dpjennifer, @bakerstreetboys, @tosh24... ugh!  Sorry for your BFNs.  

I’m 6 days or so from AF now.  Feels a bit like watching paint dry...

bakerstreetboys

@tosh24 and @Mack2342 Sorry to hear about the BFNs ladies.  This journey sucks.  @Mack2342 does your niece know that you might want her to be a donor?  We aren't there yet, but I'm so torn on whether or not I would use donor eggs; I don't have sisters or nieces, so it would have to be from a stranger.  
@ccvslp  How messed up is it when we're dying for AF to get here?!  Ugh.  I hope these last few days pass quickly for you and you get off the bench soon!
I'm trying to think of a positive of what I'm sure is impending AF... stopping progesterone for a couple of weeks?

Mack2342

@bakerstreetboys no I’ve never discussed it with her. I would rather use family if we went that way but then again a stranger might be easier as there would be no attachment.   

dpjennifer

Temp dropped below coverline this morning... waiting for AF. *sigh* and the cycle continues. I just have to reality check myself... I mean, this is really only the 3rd cycle of us trying again. It just seems like forever because before these few cycles of trying, I was benched since my loss in Feb. 2017. Really just wanna get this show on the road. 

Mack2342

@dpjennifer sorry about the temp drop.  I had one too so waiting for AF as well. It sucks 

ccvslp

Question for you all as my freedom to TTC approaches (I agree it's messed up wishing for it @bakerstreetboys)... I'm feeling nervous about supplementing with estrogen and then progesterone for the first time... more so the estrogen.  I know several of you have done progesterone; how do you feel on it?  Anyone taken supplemental estrogen as well.... what were the side effects like?  I'm hoping to not feel crappy for two weeks every month before PG is even in the equation but of course you do what you've gotta do and I will! 

tosh24

@ccvslp oral estrogen is not the most fun,  not going to lie. Take with food or you'll be nauseated. You'll basically be a crying mess while on it,  so expect that. Mood swings are fun. May make you feel tired, dizzy. You'll be good and bloated. Vaginal estrogen gives you less side effects - you'll mainly just get crampy and bloated. If the estrogen is for lining,  my guess is that you are using it as a suppository and not orally. The progesterone just gives you typical PMS symptoms. Can cause cramping too. And sore boobs. You'll basically need to wear a liner the whole month cause you'll leak 24/7 (if doing the vaginal estrogen as well as the progesterone). But, it's not like you'll feel too sick to go on with daily life,  it's just a bunch of minor annoyances that add up so you'll likely be extra irritable.

ccvslp

Thanks @tosh24... the estrogen will be vaginal and will be CD12-16 if I measure less than 5 on CD12 (I’m 99% sure I will, it’s been pathetic.)  and then it’ll be on to progesterone very soon after that +3 to test/AF or 12 weeks.  I’m glad there are less side effects that way.  Pantyliner party.

bakerstreetboys

@ccvslp I just started progesterone this month and for me, the biggest side effect is headaches.  The leaking in my case wasn't actually as bad as I was expecting.

coco2787

any update @cassafrass15?  Been thinking of you.

etnyah

Good luck with the supplemental hormones, @ccvslp! Hopefully you’ll have minimal side effects and a BFP soon!

I’m currently 10 dpo and got a BFN this morning. I know it’s too early for me (last BFP was around 13-14 dpo and it was really faint), but I’ve been super bloated, tired and my boobs are killing me. Could just be PMS, but I rarely get PMS so I’m slightly hopeful. Emphasis on “slightly”!

This weekend I’m going to see my inlaws and my dad, and I’m a little worried about declining drinks. My MIL has been grandchild crazy since before I met my husband (he’s an only child and has no kids), and the first thing she does every time we visit is to offer me a glass of wine. I might take it and sip slowly throughout the evening. No one in either of our families know we’re ttc, and I’d like it to stay that way until well into the first trimester of a potential future pregnancy. 

Mack2342

Well I’m frustrated with my body.  So I’m 16 DPO and still BFNs.  I typically have 28 29 cycle and today makes 29.  My temps are hovering right at coverline.  The last two days I’ve been very nauseous.  I stopped taking progesterone on Wednesday when I got a BFN. Typically once I stop progesterone I start AF within a day.  I have no cramps to indicate that it’s coming.  I ordered my meds an was hoping that today would be CD1 and I could get US.  If I’m not pregnant I just want to move on to next cycle.  My other fear is last year at this time I found out I was pregnant but I didn’t turn a test until I was 21 DPO and it ended shortly thereafter so I worry that the same thing could be happening 

bakerstreetboys

@Mack2342 So frustrating   Only after loses do we worry about getting a positive test "too late" or wishing AF would hurry up and show.  I hope you get your answer soon.  I'm a couple of days behind you in the same boat.  Still BFN but no AF yet.  My CP was a late BFP so I fear that again too.  I stopped progesterone today because I don't want to delay AF.

Mack2342

@bakerstreetboys it’s ridiculous how our minds work post loss.  Sometimes I wonder if it just in my head.  Sorry about the BFN. They just suck

rowedking6

@grebretso here's to No PMS and a bfp for you! Bring on the sore boobs! 

@Mack2342 and @bakerstreetboys ((hugs)) to you both,  I'm sorry about the head games a loss brings on. 

AFM, the only side effect the progesterone has given me is fatigue but I remember after IVF with my twins, I had the injections. The pain, oy. I knew after that round I'd never do it again. And we couldn't either, had 42 eggs, 19 fertilized and literally down to the three that transferred. Nothing left. Something about quality. Anyway, sorry bout that, guess I got to thinking about loss of all those embies for a moment. For me personally, I think that loss was a bit harder than my last mc in December. Today I'm 5 and 2 and my mc happened at like uh, 5 and 2/3. Huh,  talk about head games. ....

cassafrass15

@coco2787 Thanks for thinking of me! How are you doing? Update in spoiler:

I’m doing ok. With my 3 losses last year I always knew it was coming, somewhat, because I started bleeding or spotting heavily right around 13/14dpo. I’ve had a teensy bit of spotting yesterday and today, but it’s more like pink-tinged CM, only in the morning and not at all like the AF-like spotting I’ve experienced before. I had a beta drawn at 12dpo (3w2d) and it was 27, which I thought sounded low but my RE was happy with. I had another draw today, so I’m just waiting for my results on pins and needles! I am cautiously hopeful.

@tosh24 I am so sorry for your BFN. I think even though you have plenty of embies left, it’s still totally legitimate to feel heartbroken. Feel your feels, lady.

@ccvslp Estrogen made me (TMI alert) horribly
constipated, but progesterone is the real mind-f**k. GL and hang in there.

@grebretso FX so hard! I make my own drinks and leave out the liquor to avoid awkward questions, but I guess that wouldn’t work with wine...GL!

@Mack2342 and @bakerstreetboys Sorry about the wonky cycles - I’ve had a few of those and it’s so annoying when you want to just get going again. FX things regulate soon.

I might update again later, but I don’t want to make anyone feel mad/bad so I won’t bore you all with my PGAL saga after that.

rowedking6

@cassafrass15 I can understand your pins and needles! I haven't even done a beta yet. Will you get another in 48 hours? 

cassafrass15

@rowedking6 See spoiler:

I had another beta today (48hrs after my first) and my HCG more than tripled! Hopefully that’s a sign of good things to come. I’m having one more done on Monday and an US on Wednesday. 

Are tou you planning on getting a beta? Have you joined your BMB? I think I’m going to head over to mine so I don’t bug our TTCAL ladies.

Mack2342

Congrats ladies!

AFM, AF arrived without any notice which is unusual for me.   I’m relieved it showed though so we can move forward 

rowedking6

@cassafrass15 see spoiler 

Yea I guess it's time to move on. You know, prior to all of this we TTC for 11 years. I sure know all to well how it feels every time someone announces their BFP and you're left wondering if you'll ever get to say this time. ..it's me! 
I certainly don't want to hurt anyone's feelings either so. **baby dust** to all 

etnyah

@cassafrass15 YAY for good betas!!! I hope this works out!!

AFM, I don’t even know what to think now. 11dpo, yesterday around noon I had spotting, just a tiny bit of dark red on one wipe and that was it. This morning and throughout the day I’ve been having light pink spotting, but not enough to even use a liner. It looks like textbook implantation bleeding (and exactly like I had when I was pg), except... I already had spotting at 5dpo, which looked completely different from this (even less, but it looked fresher). If this is implantation bleeding, then what the heck was that?

My boobs are even more painful today than yesterday, I’m slightly nauseous, and very confused. I’m mostly worried the first bleeding was implantation and this one’s the beginning of another cp, but I think the first bleed was too early for implantation. Who knows at this point. I’ll POS Monday morning.

tosh24

So, I've been taking HPTs since 4 days after my transfer. All negative (well, 4 days after was still a slight shadow of a line from the trigger shot but then it went negative by the next day). I went for my beta yesterday and it was 54. WTF? I tried two different brands of HPT (internet cheapies) and both are still showing negative this morning (10 and 20 mIU/ml sensitivities). I have a second beta tomorrow. My sister never turned an HPT positive with my niece - she found out via blood test as well. I've read there is something in someone's genetics that can cause them to not metabolize hcg where it shows up in urine, so I wonder if something like that is happening since it also happened to my sister (genetically related). I feel like this happens on "I didn't know I was pregnant". I'm also freaking out that I have something like a cyst that is secreting a form of hcg that isn't picked up on HPTs and I'm not actually pregnant. Pair that with the fact that the first beta is somewhat low and I'm a mess. I just want to sleep until tomorrow. Uggghhhhh. Why am I ALWAYS the "special snowflake"?????????????

Beta/HPT WTF in spoiler

Kath525

@tosh24 I'm so sorry everything is so confusing right now. But i hope your next betas show rising numbers and that this your take home baby!! Please keep us updated!!!