I don’t like how many mom memes are associated with drinking after a hard day. It’s not my thing but it almost feel implied that it’s a must in order to function with kids. Don’t get me wrong i like wine and liquor but i don’t go around drinking all the time because of my kid or a hard day. It’s more of a celebratory thing to me.
I don't feel strongly about gender stereotypes. I would never discourage a child from playing with a certain type of toy but I don't feel bad for getting our dd a kitchen set and baby dolls. she loves them a ton and also loves playing with her farm and blocks too.
@lindsayleigh1989 i agree with you! DH tries to avoid buy girl stuff or colors but i always comment that it shouldn’t matter as long as he likes it. An object or color is not going to turn him into anything but more accepting and loving.
@wildtot Agreed! I love wine but I don't need it to handle being with my son. I love everything about him, even the tantrums and fussiness. True, a glass of wine at the end of a long, hard day helps to relax me, but enough already with the "I gotta be drunk in order to do X, Y, Z with my kid". It's just showing our kids that in order to 'deal' with them, we need to be drunk/buzzed/not sober. Ouch. Those "there may be wine in here" coffee cups really bug me for this reason.
@wildtot I used to be the person who posted things on social media all the time about having a drink because I was stressed. But so many in my family have an issue with drinking in excess that I truthfully do not get any joy out of it anymore because I feel like it encourages loved ones to drink in excess and makes them think that others use drinking to cope so its cool for them to as well. I have friends whose kids have asked them before, "Mommy, why are you drunk?" and roll their eyes when their parents get more beer and I don't ever want to hear that from my kids when they get older. Again, this probably has a lot to do with my family's history with drinking issues.
I’m not a huge drinker at all, I like to have a good time, but realistically if I drink once or twice a month that’s a lot. That being said, I did see one that I just thought was absolutely hilarious and completely relatable. I guess I’m in the minority here?
My UO: I think baby girls with pierced ears are super cute and when done at a reputable piercing shop it's totally fine/safe. I would have pierced DD's ears at 6 weeks but it made DH uncomfortable so I didn't push the issue and won't with this baby either. DD keeps asking for earrings now and I do wish her ears were pierced.
Oh man I am very anti piercing baby ears. I’m happy to let my girls get it done when they’re old enough to ask for it but it feels really pageant mom-y to me.
My UO (maybe?) I think cursing regularly just sounds trashy and uneducated...and I am a native New Yorker so it’s not like I’m sheltered from it, I just grew up and realized you sound a million times more reputable and intelligent if you keep curse words out of your regular vocabulary
@lindsayleigh1989 I agree. Our DD tends to gravitate towards the more "girly" toys but at daycare she spends most of her day playing with little boys and getting bad guys with lego guns. Our DS is all around boy when he's outside; more dirt than boy by the end of the night, but he also likes me to do his hair and put "make up" on him. My DH and I are perfectly fine to accommodate both of their interests!
@wildtot YES that drives me nuts too! It's obviously nice and relaxing to have a glass of wine at the end of the day but all the merchandise you can buy that tries to make a joke about just comes off tacky.
To add to that (sorta) I am not a fan of coffee mugs that have inappropriate language on them. I recently saw a pretty flowered mug with "f**k off" written is cursive. I just find it crude and not necessary. Would you really use that mug in your office for your boss to see (or clients) or at home with your kids once they learn to read? I don't see the appeal!
lol at that mug @runsomewhere ! That song is now in my head...daddy finger, daddy finger, where are you?
@devilcat139 I am not that opposed to piercing baby's ears--it was done to me and I like that I didn't have to think about it as I grew up. My little sister ripped hers out in her sleep as a baby (my mom watched her do it) and she never got them pierced again and she's 24 now.
related...my UO is that people shouldn't be against ear piercing a girl AND also in favor of circumcising a boy. That's just plain hypocritical. I'm not against circumcision--just be consistent!
FTR, we didn't circumcise our DS and our decision was based purely on the fact that it wasn't a medical necessity at the time and so we were like, "meh, let's leave him be". We did not have strong opinions either way, and still feel that way. I am very happy with our decision now, though, after reading more about the function and care of the foreskin.
I am also not a fan of piercing baby girls' ears. Where I grew up it's extremely tacky. Which is funny because it's common in Southern Italy. My entire family hates the idea though so I guess it just stuck with me.
@zg49 I am pro sweary coffee cup and pro sweary shirt...but not in public. And I won't wear my sweary shirt that says, "Mindful as F*ck" when DS is learning to read, that is for sure. @runsomewhere that mug might be the best things ever.
@flockofmoosen3 well I mean I am against baby ear piercing but would 100% circumcise my child if I were having a boy but...I'm Jewish. I'd say it's fairly consistent logically as one is for a religious purpose and the other is completely aesthetic
@SmashJam me too. I think they are funny but I would only ever wear it at home, or to a girls night or something. I have a few funny shirts that I wear on the river in the Summer. They are pretty perfect for that.
I don't really know how I feel about pierced ears on a baby girl. I don't think I would ever do it for my baby, but I dont' have a problem with it when I see it on other babies. My parents made me wait until I was like 10 (or 12?) to get it done and it was like a big deal. I had a girls day with my mom, my sister, and my aunt and that was a part of it. I would probably do the same for my daughter, if she even wants them pierced.
Meagan Married 6.12.10 DS 11.8.12 Baby GIRL! due 7.4.18
I personally would not pierce my daughter's ears if I were having a girl. For one, in my family it was a privilege to get your ears pierced once you were old enough to verbalize wanting it, and old enough to take care of it and be responsible for it. It was a sign of growing up and maturing. I was around 10. I also believe in body autonomy, and do not want to make a permanent physical decision for my children that they may not have wanted if they were old enough to decide. I also just don't think babies and really little kids need to be wearing jewelry so maybe it's also a growing up too fast type of thing. FTR we did not circumcise my son, and will not circumcise this one either. I don't view it as medically necessary and did not want to make that decision for my child without his consent.
I'm with @runsomewhere. I got DD's ears pierced when she was around 5 months old at a pediatrician's office. I had mine done as a baby and growing up I never had problems with them. But I had friends who had them pierced at an older age whose closed or got infected. I'm sure it was all pure coincidence, but because that's how I was raised and I enjoyed it, I did DD. For the last year she's been wearing a pair that I grew up wearing and that makes me happy.
I'm letting DH decide if this boy will be circumcised or not. Last I heard the statistics were around 50/50 in the US.
@devilcat139 I give you a solid pass on the religious reason, as well as a pass on any medical reason for circumcising. :-) Again, I'm not against doing it, but if it's just about aesthetics or fear of the unknown and you're not consistent on body modification for both sexes, then I find it hypocritical. THAT is my UO.
I come from a latin family, so ear piercing girls as babies is common. But I fell in love with the idea of making a big deal out of it and a full girls' day out when my DDs are old enough to care for their piercings so that's why I'm waiting. Also...I would totally get matching tattoos with my (adult) kids if they asked me, lol!
@wildtot I feel the same about drinking after a day of parenting. Don't get me wrong, my kids stress me out but it seriously never occurs to me to drink because of it. I rarely drink these days and basically only if we are out with friends. I'd rather eat ice cream at the end of the day than have a glass of wine lol. I feel similarly about those "hot mess moms" posts. My SIL is constantly sharing them and basically proud of the fact that she can't show up anywhere on time, rolls up to school drop off with food in her hair, etc. I certainly don't have it all together but I just don't get being proud of being a mess.
As far as piercing baby's ears, I wouldn't do it purely because that's one more thing I would have to take care of/worry about. I don't really think twice about it if someone else pierces their baby's ears though.
My UO is that I don't get those milksnob (or whatever brand) car seat cover things. Maybe it's my anxiety talking but I just think it's got to be hot and there would be poor oxygen flow in there. I know they say it's breathable but just trying to use a muslin blanket as a nursing cover, my kid was a sweaty mess. I just can't see ever using that thing. This is brought to you by the millionth ad for them I've seen this week.
Married 9/19/09 Me (32) Dx PCOS, DH (32) SA = Normal/mild morph issues TTC#5 July 2017 - 3rd cycle TTC = BFP on 11/12/17 at 9dpo Beta #1 = 96 at 13dpo - Beta #2 = 207 at 15dpo
TTC#1 starting Nov. 2009 3 rounds of Clomid + TI and 3 rounds of 7.5 mg Femara + IUI before our BFP on 11/8/10 at 12dpiui TTC #2 3rd cycle of Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 4 follies = BFP on 10/12/12 TTC#3 July 2014 - Metformin +TI = BFP at 9dpo - Twins, one baby lost at 5.5 weeks Macy Annabelle born at 37w4d on 4/29/15. Diagnosed with Cri du Chat and passed away on 6/6/15. Forever in our hearts. TTC#4 3rd cycle of Metformin + Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 3 follies = BFP on 12/24/16
I'm not a huge drinker either, and I would usually prefer a beer at the end of the day than a glass of wine. I developed an allergy to red wine after my first pregnancy and I've never quite gotten over it. My older sister is one of those who drinks daily and posts/buys all that "wino" stuff. No thanks.
@Sarafuss - are you referring to the ones like Covered Goods? I LOVE mine from them! To me, it breathed even better than the muslim nursing cover I bought. I use mine for nursing, not a car seat cover though. I treated myself to a new one on Black Friday this year as a pregnancy gift to myself because I had been wanting a burgundy one and they released one. I've had friends buy this brand and others though and they all said the other brands were super hot.
@MichelleAG05 yes although the ads I've been seeing are Milksnob but there are several brands that sell them. I could see using it as a nursing cover (although some of my babies have refused to eat under a cover).
Married 9/19/09 Me (32) Dx PCOS, DH (32) SA = Normal/mild morph issues TTC#5 July 2017 - 3rd cycle TTC = BFP on 11/12/17 at 9dpo Beta #1 = 96 at 13dpo - Beta #2 = 207 at 15dpo
TTC#1 starting Nov. 2009 3 rounds of Clomid + TI and 3 rounds of 7.5 mg Femara + IUI before our BFP on 11/8/10 at 12dpiui TTC #2 3rd cycle of Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 4 follies = BFP on 10/12/12 TTC#3 July 2014 - Metformin +TI = BFP at 9dpo - Twins, one baby lost at 5.5 weeks Macy Annabelle born at 37w4d on 4/29/15. Diagnosed with Cri du Chat and passed away on 6/6/15. Forever in our hearts. TTC#4 3rd cycle of Metformin + Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 3 follies = BFP on 12/24/16
@wildtot I agree with you. I drink (well when not pregnant) at least once a week so I don't have anything against drinking, but the extra stuff and shirts are a little annoying to me. My step brother HAD to drink every day just to "calm down and wind down". His son went to school all day so he had 3 hours with him before bed and it apparently always made him such a stressed mess, so that always rubbed me the wrong way.
@runsomewhere I think it's pretty cute as well, I don't have any strong feelings against it, I'm just not sure when we would decide to do it. DH doesn't like the idea of doing it when she's real young.
@devilcat139 I don't particularly like cussing either. Sometimes people do it and I just realize that's how they talk but you can tell when people are just trying to put the 'f' word in unnecessarily. When people do that I check out of the conversation and pretty much stop listening. Seems like they're being showy versus just talking how they normal express themselves.
For circumcism in general I'm for it. Of course, just my personal opinion that isn't right or wrong.. I've known two adults who are not circumcised, both felt embarrassed growing up because they were different than other boys and sometimes picked on. Kids are going to be bullied about an ungodly amount of things unfortunately, I know that. But, I feel like kids already have so much about themselves that they can't change and will need to defend themselves for, so for our son (if we have one) we will circumcise him.
I guess my UO would be that I love wine and beer (and cocktails). I don't know if I'd brag about it on social media or whatnot, but one of the hardest things for me this pregnancy is not being able to have a glass of wine with dinner or a cocktail on a Friday night. I can't wait to be able to enjoy again. (obviously not to get wasted, but just to be able to have that choice to have one or not).
TTC History:
Me: 36 H: 40 Married 2015. Together since 2010. TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017 BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018. TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020 Due date was Nov 2020 DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma. TTC: March 2021 IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022 IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
My ears were pierced when I was a baby and I loved it. I was grateful I didn’t have to deal with it when I was older. Also I’m originally from the south where it’s super common. I went to high school in the north and did not understand why it was such a big deal for other girls and their families.
My UO, I guess I don’t understand what the big deal is with not doing this or that until a child is “old enough to decide on their own.” Following that logic we would be stunted on everything. We make SO many decisions and choices for our children regarding ALL SORTS of topics...bottle/breast, school, religion, diet, sports, extracurricular activities, medical decisions, ect because we are the parents and that is our job. Ex. We eat meat in our home, my child may decide when he is older to be vegan. That is fine and I will support it but until then, we will eat meat..I guess same as @flockofmoosen3 be consistent.
Honestly I've heard the not fitting in/being embarrassed reason for circumcising a lot and am always really confused by it...like, do little boys/adolescents/teenagers walk around naked together and compare penises? Not trying to be snarky, I'm genuinely wondering. I don't think any of my girlfriends ever saw my vagina, or even my breasts for that matter, to be able to compare. But maybe boys are different?
@zande2016 both the guys I knew were in athletics, so they were naked around each other in a locker room on a daily basis. And side note, when I was in P.E and took showers I didn't walk around without being covered, but I've always heard guys being less covered in their locker rooms for whatever reason.
I don't know about the picking on each other about size, but I could see them making a bigger deal about circumcised or not since there's a big difference on how it looks and (at least in the past) not as common. Of course it's been done and not done forever, but I don't think it was extremely common. Also, teens finding anything and everything to pick on people about, that could have been some of the issue as well for these boys I know, I'm not sure.
I think in future generations the picking on each other for circumcised vs non won't be as much of an issue now that (in general across the US), it's closer to 50/50.
For anyone who is considering infant ear piercing, here's my 2 cents: do it between 3-6 months and opt *not* to get the numbing cream. To make sure the numbing cream stays in place, they put a sticker on the kids face/ear over the cream. After I opted to pay $10 extra for it thinking it was genius, the nurse told me that the babies actually cry more from removing the sticker from their face than the actual piercing itself. If I have another daughter, I'll do it closer to 3-4 months - the shots at that age went better for us too before she started getting more aware.
I agree with @MichelleAG05. Circumcision isn't common in Italy. I thought DH was going to opt for it but he said he didn't care. I have a few friends who didn't circumcise either. I also think that by the time our kids are older it will be most likely more than 50/50 and it won't be a huge deal.
I am probably being really naive but I also hope that kids aren't so cruel when my kids are growing up, and are more accepting of people who are different than them. I will be striving to teach that to my children and I know a lot of parents who do the same, and in today's society I do feel we are overall more accepting of differences than we used to be (though we still have a long way to do). Plus as others have said it is becoming much more common now to be uncircumcised in the U.S. than it was when we were growing up, so I think it's less likely my sons will be the only ones.
My doctor told me a couple of years ago as I was trying to decide whether or not to circumcise DS that in our area, the rate of circumcision was only about 70%. I feel like the trend nowadays means that more boys are not going to be circumcised than in years past, and it's not going to be as weird by time they get to the locker room and require showers. I have also heard of parents being concerned about their son's future partners...but in a way, that's a really weird thing to worry about. I just want my kids to be healthy regarding sex...but that's as far as I care to think about it.
RE ear piercing - we opted not to with DD, if we had done it would have been at the pediatrician during a monthly check up. We went back and forth because I didn't have a strong opinion or cultural motivation. I got mine done as a first communion gift (2nd grade maybe?) but mine ended up in a stupid spot on my lobe after my head grew - but i may just be special.
RE circumcision - we talked about it before, I'm leaving it up to my husband because, well, he has the equipment and has more data points than me. I see both sides of the argument though. I believe DH is in favor of doing it, but I would have the pediatrician or pediatric urologist perform it.
I hope kids will be more accepting of all things in the future, I know the world is trying to push that direction anyways. The topic of bullying scares DH and I.
So just read the post in third tri board regarding the drinking. Trying hard not to say anything because to me it’s just wrong and unacceptable while pregnant no matter what the circumstances are. She clearly knows she had some stuff to work through and resorted to the wrong thing to deal with it. Glad someone else was able to provide a supportive response.
edited to say i realize i sound pretty judgmental and I’m normally not like this. I really do hope baby is ok and she gets help. I fear it could only get worse pp.
@flockofmoosen3 Re your comment about considering the partners... I still remember the first time i encountered an ‘anteater’ (not until my 20s) and I was SO confused... it required a 101 — can’t say it was my favorite experience at all. Hah.
That said, this UO helped me realize my husband and I haven’t even discussed this yet... I think I’ll keep my past personal perspective on the topic to myself when we do.
I have always thought I will let my husband decide he is uncut and I figure if he wants it done or doesnt want it done for our child if we ever have a boy he knows more about it than I do. I will say i most definitely do not view it was genital mutilation as I have come across some making that argument in the past.
Eeek. I'm pretty sure most of you would NOT want to be friends with me!
- DS is circumcised. It really did not occur to us to NOT do it, and as I've stated when this topic has come up previously, I worry about infection and having to have it done as an adult. If DH had an opinion on it to not do it, I'd have listened to him
- DD had her ears pierced at 4 months after necessary shots. She loves to accessorize her earrings, and sometimes goes without earrings for a week or two. Either way. If she decided she didn't want them anymore, that would be fine, too
- I LOVE having a cocktail or two or three. I miss going to dinner and having a drink with my husband. I absolutely have posted on social media about wanting/needing a cocktail at the end of the day. Being pregnant before, it never bothered me, but now with kids that are almost 8 and almost 5 and our crazy schedule, I miss being able to relax with a glass of wine. It's not every day, and it's actually gotten easier now that hockey season is basically over (this is what parents do at hockey tournaments!), but having a drink is pretty much my only vice in life. And I do think some of the memes are funny/true. And I've definitely gifted a bottle of wine and liquor store gift cards to my kids' teachers!
- I curse. I've tried to table it, but I do curse. Probably too much for some people's tastes. I know my audience and do not do it around certain people/ages, etc...
@gspmom21 I totally agree. I am very accepting of pretty much everyone. DH is not as accepting, but is not a bully. He has certain religious beliefs, whereas I'm more liberal in my thinking (even though we are the same religion). I just simply do not get what people get out of outwardly judging other people, making broad statements/opinions, and using that against others. I try to raise my kids to be strong- you don't have to be friends with everyone, some people will agree with you and some will not, you are allowed to have your own interests, etc... but you are NOT allowed to hold it against other people. Because I work with kids with special needs, this is really a sensitive issue for me.
**Soapbox** speaking of which, next Wednesday, March 7 is Spread the Word to End the Word Day. It is a day to recognize that hurtful way people use the "R" word, and to stress the word "Respect". There are online petitions you can sign in support of it, and ways to help others ban using this derogatory term for good. LMK if you want more info **Climbing off of Soapbox**
@pretzellover I also had a boyfriend in college who was uncut. It was new to me but I didn't need a tutorial and it worked like it was supposed to so I didn't care haha. I'm sorry you had a bad experience.
Re: UO 3/1
I guess I’m in the minority here?
My UO (maybe?) I think cursing regularly just sounds trashy and uneducated...and I am a native New Yorker so it’s not like I’m sheltered from it, I just grew up and realized you sound a million times more reputable and intelligent if you keep curse words out of your regular vocabulary
@wildtot YES that drives me nuts too! It's obviously nice and relaxing to have a glass of wine at the end of the day but all the merchandise you can buy that tries to make a joke about just comes off tacky.
To add to that (sorta) I am not a fan of coffee mugs that have inappropriate language on them. I recently saw a pretty flowered mug with "f**k off" written is cursive. I just find it crude and not necessary. Would you really use that mug in your office for your boss to see (or clients) or at home with your kids once they learn to read? I don't see the appeal!
I'm so low brow today lol.
@devilcat139 I am not that opposed to piercing baby's ears--it was done to me and I like that I didn't have to think about it as I grew up. My little sister ripped hers out in her sleep as a baby (my mom watched her do it) and she never got them pierced again and she's 24 now.
related...my UO is that people shouldn't be against ear piercing a girl AND also in favor of circumcising a boy. That's just plain hypocritical. I'm not against circumcision--just be consistent!
FTR, we didn't circumcise our DS and our decision was based purely on the fact that it wasn't a medical necessity at the time and so we were like, "meh, let's leave him be". We did not have strong opinions either way, and still feel that way. I am very happy with our decision now, though, after reading more about the function and care of the foreskin.
I don't really know how I feel about pierced ears on a baby girl. I don't think I would ever do it for my baby, but I dont' have a problem with it when I see it on other babies. My parents made me wait until I was like 10 (or 12?) to get it done and it was like a big deal. I had a girls day with my mom, my sister, and my aunt and that was a part of it. I would probably do the same for my daughter, if she even wants them pierced.
DS 11.8.12
Baby GIRL! due 7.4.18
I'm letting DH decide if this boy will be circumcised or not. Last I heard the statistics were around 50/50 in the US.
I come from a latin family, so ear piercing girls as babies is common. But I fell in love with the idea of making a big deal out of it and a full girls' day out when my DDs are old enough to care for their piercings so that's why I'm waiting. Also...I would totally get matching tattoos with my (adult) kids if they asked me, lol!
As far as piercing baby's ears, I wouldn't do it purely because that's one more thing I would have to take care of/worry about. I don't really think twice about it if someone else pierces their baby's ears though.
My UO is that I don't get those milksnob (or whatever brand) car seat cover things. Maybe it's my anxiety talking but I just think it's got to be hot and there would be poor oxygen flow in there. I know they say it's breathable but just trying to use a muslin blanket as a nursing cover, my kid was a sweaty mess. I just can't see ever using that thing. This is brought to you by the millionth ad for them I've seen this week.
Me (32) Dx PCOS, DH (32) SA = Normal/mild morph issues
TTC#5 July 2017 - 3rd cycle TTC = BFP on 11/12/17 at 9dpo Beta #1 = 96 at 13dpo - Beta #2 = 207 at 15dpo
3 rounds of Clomid + TI and 3 rounds of 7.5 mg Femara + IUI before our BFP on 11/8/10 at 12dpiui
TTC #2 3rd cycle of Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 4 follies = BFP on 10/12/12
TTC#3 July 2014 - Metformin +TI = BFP at 9dpo - Twins, one baby lost at 5.5 weeks
Macy Annabelle born at 37w4d on 4/29/15. Diagnosed with Cri du Chat and passed away on 6/6/15. Forever in our hearts.
TTC#4 3rd cycle of Metformin + Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 3 follies = BFP on 12/24/16
@Sarafuss - are you referring to the ones like Covered Goods? I LOVE mine from them! To me, it breathed even better than the muslim nursing cover I bought. I use mine for nursing, not a car seat cover though. I treated myself to a new one on Black Friday this year as a pregnancy gift to myself because I had been wanting a burgundy one and they released one. I've had friends buy this brand and others though and they all said the other brands were super hot.
Me (32) Dx PCOS, DH (32) SA = Normal/mild morph issues
TTC#5 July 2017 - 3rd cycle TTC = BFP on 11/12/17 at 9dpo Beta #1 = 96 at 13dpo - Beta #2 = 207 at 15dpo
3 rounds of Clomid + TI and 3 rounds of 7.5 mg Femara + IUI before our BFP on 11/8/10 at 12dpiui
TTC #2 3rd cycle of Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 4 follies = BFP on 10/12/12
TTC#3 July 2014 - Metformin +TI = BFP at 9dpo - Twins, one baby lost at 5.5 weeks
Macy Annabelle born at 37w4d on 4/29/15. Diagnosed with Cri du Chat and passed away on 6/6/15. Forever in our hearts.
TTC#4 3rd cycle of Metformin + Femara 7.5mg+Ovidrel+TI = 3 follies = BFP on 12/24/16
@wildtot I agree with you. I drink (well when not pregnant) at least once a week so I don't have anything against drinking, but the extra stuff and shirts are a little annoying to me. My step brother HAD to drink every day just to "calm down and wind down". His son went to school all day so he had 3 hours with him before bed and it apparently always made him such a stressed mess, so that always rubbed me the wrong way.
@runsomewhere I think it's pretty cute as well, I don't have any strong feelings against it, I'm just not sure when we would decide to do it. DH doesn't like the idea of doing it when she's real young.
@devilcat139 I don't particularly like cussing either. Sometimes people do it and I just realize that's how they talk but you can tell when people are just trying to put the 'f' word in unnecessarily. When people do that I check out of the conversation and pretty much stop listening. Seems like they're being showy versus just talking how they normal express themselves.
For circumcism in general I'm for it. Of course, just my personal opinion that isn't right or wrong.. I've known two adults who are not circumcised, both felt embarrassed growing up because they were different than other boys and sometimes picked on. Kids are going to be bullied about an ungodly amount of things unfortunately, I know that. But, I feel like kids already have so much about themselves that they can't change and will need to defend themselves for, so for our son (if we have one) we will circumcise him.
TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017
BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018.
TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020
Due date was Nov 2020
DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma.
TTC: March 2021
IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN
IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022
IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN
IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN
AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
My UO, I guess I don’t understand what the big deal is with not doing this or that until a child is “old enough to decide on their own.” Following that logic we would be stunted on everything. We make SO many decisions and choices for our children regarding ALL SORTS of topics...bottle/breast, school, religion, diet, sports, extracurricular activities, medical decisions, ect because we are the parents and that is our job. Ex. We eat meat in our home, my child may decide when he is older to be vegan. That is fine and I will support it but until then, we will eat meat..I guess same as @flockofmoosen3 be consistent.
@zande2016 both the guys I knew were in athletics, so they were naked around each other in a locker room on a daily basis. And side note, when I was in P.E and took showers I didn't walk around without being covered, but I've always heard guys being less covered in their locker rooms for whatever reason.
I don't know about the picking on each other about size, but I could see them making a bigger deal about circumcised or not since there's a big difference on how it looks and (at least in the past) not as common. Of course it's been done and not done forever, but I don't think it was extremely common. Also, teens finding anything and everything to pick on people about, that could have been some of the issue as well for these boys I know, I'm not sure.
For anyone who is considering infant ear piercing, here's my 2 cents: do it between 3-6 months and opt *not* to get the numbing cream. To make sure the numbing cream stays in place, they put a sticker on the kids face/ear over the cream. After I opted to pay $10 extra for it thinking it was genius, the nurse told me that the babies actually cry more from removing the sticker from their face than the actual piercing itself. If I have another daughter, I'll do it closer to 3-4 months - the shots at that age went better for us too before she started getting more aware.
RE circumcision - we talked about it before, I'm leaving it up to my husband because, well, he has the equipment and has more data points than me. I see both sides of the argument though. I believe DH is in favor of doing it, but I would have the pediatrician or pediatric urologist perform it.
edited to say i realize i sound pretty judgmental and I’m normally not like this. I really do hope baby is ok and she gets help. I fear it could only get worse pp.
That said, this UO helped me realize my husband and I haven’t even discussed this yet... I think I’ll keep my past personal perspective on the topic to myself when we do.
- DS is circumcised. It really did not occur to us to NOT do it, and as I've stated when this topic has come up previously, I worry about infection and having to have it done as an adult. If DH had an opinion on it to not do it, I'd have listened to him
- DD had her ears pierced at 4 months after necessary shots. She loves to accessorize her earrings, and sometimes goes without earrings for a week or two. Either way. If she decided she didn't want them anymore, that would be fine, too
- I LOVE having a cocktail or two or three. I miss going to dinner and having a drink with my husband. I absolutely have posted on social media about wanting/needing a cocktail at the end of the day. Being pregnant before, it never bothered me, but now with kids that are almost 8 and almost 5 and our crazy schedule, I miss being able to relax with a glass of wine. It's not every day, and it's actually gotten easier now that hockey season is basically over (this is what parents do at hockey tournaments!), but having a drink is pretty much my only vice in life. And I do think some of the memes are funny/true. And I've definitely gifted a bottle of wine and liquor store gift cards to my kids' teachers!
- I curse. I've tried to table it, but I do curse. Probably too much for some people's tastes. I know my audience and do not do it around certain people/ages, etc...
@gspmom21 I totally agree. I am very accepting of pretty much everyone. DH is not as accepting, but is not a bully. He has certain religious beliefs, whereas I'm more liberal in my thinking (even though we are the same religion). I just simply do not get what people get out of outwardly judging other people, making broad statements/opinions, and using that against others. I try to raise my kids to be strong- you don't have to be friends with everyone, some people will agree with you and some will not, you are allowed to have your own interests, etc... but you are NOT allowed to hold it against other people. Because I work with kids with special needs, this is really a sensitive issue for me.
**Soapbox** speaking of which, next Wednesday, March 7 is Spread the Word to End the Word Day. It is a day to recognize that hurtful way people use the "R" word, and to stress the word "Respect". There are online petitions you can sign in support of it, and ways to help others ban using this derogatory term for good. LMK if you want more info
Married: 6/27/2008
DS: 3/14/2010 Planned, PG first try
M/C 6/2012
DD: 4/22/2013 Planned, UnDx Infertility, PG on our own
BFP: 10/28/2016 Unplanned, HUGE SURPRISE!
M/C 12/12/2016
BFP: 10/27/2017 Unplanned, HUGE SURPRISE
EDD: 7/2/2018