Thanks guys Seeing pregnant women sucks but I mostly hate that I have to walk past the ultrasound room where I got the bad news every time I go in there.
Appointment was fine, the only testing I had done today was a blood draw to look at thyroid function and to check for diabetes. They also put in a prior approval for a hysteroscopy and a phospholipid antibody. Karyotyping definitely won’t be covered by insurance (apparently both pregnancies have to be verified by ultrasound for them to cover it) so we’re holding off on that for now. My OB is great though, she was sympathetic and acknowledged that insurance company policies are insensitive and she never used the term chemical pregnancy (a term I kind of hate) or downplayed the early loss. She told us we could still try this cycle and my H is on board again so I guess we’re going to keep on keeping on for now.
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
@coco2787 seeing babies and pregnant women while I had to sit in the waiting room was torture. Absolute unequivocal torture. Seeing happy couple going in for their US or new borns making new born sounds, ku women ready to pop in for a check up. It was seriously enough to make me sob through every blood draw/ post op appointment. I couldn't take it. It makes me ill every time I see the U/S room or the room I got the bad news in. If I didn't really love my new Dr I would change offices. All that to say I know exactly how you felt
@galactickates it’s so unfair. I wish there was a separate waiting room for loss moms. I almost wish I didn’t love my doctor/clinic so I would have a good excuse to switch.
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc. New to this thread, unfortunately not new to losses. I had a MC at 7.5 weeks while TTC the first time. (2 years ago) Just confirmed a CP today on cycle 2 of trying for a second. After my MC I was diagnosed with a bicornuate uterus.
Status: CD 1 and trying again this month
How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R?
Well I feel like my rant is pretty obvious. It’s been a really tough emotional week. I’m just trying to hang in there right now.
Any testing coming up/any recent results?
None. My doctor said she wasn’t going to do blood work unless this happens again. It’s frustrating but I’m trusting her.
GTKY: Valentines days coming up, what are your plans? We didn’t really have plans. DH cooked dinner and we spent time together.
@brookepdavis Oh no, I'm so so sorry. So many hugs to you. @coco2787 That's wonderful that your OB is so sensitive. I'm glad you were able to get some testing done, but that's too bad about the karyotyping not being covered. I don't like the term chemical pregnancy either. It wasn't until after my third loss that I realized because I had used the term chemical pregnancy, my husband didn't even think they were real pregnancies. Ugh. It makes the whole thing sound so clinical and not like a real loss.
@coco2787, I am sorry your appointment was so upsetting, but otherwise it sounds like it went well. With my 2nd ultrasound to confirm, they had me use a different ultrasound room than I usually use (different part of the building than my doctor, it's by the other 2 in his practice) so I feel fortunate I never have to see it when I go in.
@brookepdavis Welcome, but I’m so sorry that you find yourself here. I hope your stay is short.
@galactickates We should definitely get another wait room. Heck, I’d settle for a storage closet.
@holly321 and @coco2787 I’m so glad your OB offices are sensitive about that. The last time I went to mine for a consult, the nurse went to go put me in one of the rooms where I had a dilation prep procedure done the night before my D&C and I basically flipped out. I was so embarrassed at my reaction- the nurse apologized about a million times but it made me feel horrible.
Thank you all for your kind welcome. It really means a lot to me. There aren't a lot of people to turn to in these situations. I'm the only one of my close friends or family to have had a loss, so I'm grateful to have a group like this. /end sappy emotional post
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
@brookepdavis so sorry for your loss.... this is a great place for support.
ALL: my obstetrical surgeon for my septum was in the same practice as my OB for my longest pregnancy..... so triggering. My first day there for the consult, an obviously pregnant woman and her whole family was there happy and excited after just finding out the gender together.... it was crushing. The worst.
Had a very realistic pregnancy dream last night and I had a cute bump and was as far along as I should be right now. I was so happy. And then I woke up
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
Did a pregnancy test this morning, was negative as I had already guessed. Anyway had a great day trying to forget about it but then just disintegrated into tears. The SO was great just holding me while I cried it out. I just wanted it to be easy like other people get it, wanted good news to erase all the hurt from the bad. It was always going to be unlikely the first month trying after my mmc was going to result in a bfp but I can't really express how much I hoped it would be. Anyway I'm the blotchy emotional mess on the couch feeling sorry for myself. Ps sorry for the unloading.
@lokibear89 - doll we've all been there. I'm so sorry for the bfn. If I could give you a hug right now I would. I know how you're feeling. I wish it got easier. The first month after my loss I was supposed to be benched but I wanted so badly to get another BFP to get the pain behind me and have something to look forward to. Every month that has passed I keep believing "this is month!" Only to get a bfn.. and the cycle repeats. It's exhausting. I'm happy your H was there to be supportive. We're always here for you too.
Re: TTCAL week of 12/02/18
Appointment was fine, the only testing I had done today was a blood draw to look at thyroid function and to check for diabetes. They also put in a prior approval for a hysteroscopy and a phospholipid antibody. Karyotyping definitely won’t be covered by insurance (apparently both pregnancies have to be verified by ultrasound for them to cover it) so we’re holding off on that for now. My OB is great though, she was sympathetic and acknowledged that insurance company policies are insensitive and she never used the term chemical pregnancy (a term I kind of hate) or downplayed the early loss. She told us we could still try this cycle and my H is on board again so I guess we’re going to keep on keeping on for now.
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
@coco2787 That's wonderful that your OB is so sensitive. I'm glad you were able to get some testing done, but that's too bad about the karyotyping not being covered. I don't like the term chemical pregnancy either. It wasn't until after my third loss that I realized because I had used the term chemical pregnancy, my husband didn't even think they were real pregnancies. Ugh. It makes the whole thing sound so clinical and not like a real loss.
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018
@coco2787, I am sorry your appointment was so upsetting, but otherwise it sounds like it went well. With my 2nd ultrasound to confirm, they had me use a different ultrasound room than I usually use (different part of the building than my doctor, it's by the other 2 in his practice) so I feel fortunate I never have to see it when I go in.
@Spylon, I hope your appointment went well today.
@galactickates We should definitely get another wait room. Heck, I’d settle for a storage closet.
@holly321 and @coco2787 I’m so glad your OB offices are sensitive about that. The last time I went to mine for a consult, the nurse went to go put me in one of the rooms where I had a dilation prep procedure done the night before my D&C and I basically flipped out. I was so embarrassed at my reaction- the nurse apologized about a million times but it made me feel horrible.
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
ALL: my obstetrical surgeon for my septum was in the same practice as my OB for my longest pregnancy..... so triggering. My first day there for the consult, an obviously pregnant woman and her whole family was there happy and excited after just finding out the gender together.... it was crushing. The worst.
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
Anyway I'm the blotchy emotional mess on the couch feeling sorry for myself.
Ps sorry for the unloading.