TTC After a Loss

Random thoughts thread?

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Re: Random thoughts thread?

  • edited February 2018

    Pity party ;)  Aw, apparently I don't know how to post gifs anymore...and I've checked how to do it!

  • @bakerstreetboys sorry you are still waiting on AF.  hopefully it gets here soon
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  • Mack2342 said:
    @bakerstreetboys sorry you are still waiting on AF.  hopefully it gets here soon

    Thanks!  I am currently distracting myself by trying to get GIFs to work ;)
  • @bakerstreetboys I have a hard time with those too
  • I feel like today is Monday and I’m over it! 
  • That's a crappy day!  I had a crushing moment a few weeks ago when I realized that Thursday was in fact, not a Friday.
  • OK, a few things:

    1. Am I the only one who is incapable of stopping any show on HGTV before I see the final decision/results? Like, if I don't have time to finish watching an episode of House Hunters/Fixer Upper/any other of the million shows, I HAVE to PVR it and watch it later because I feel like my life is not complete unless I KNOW which house the couple picked or what the renos look like. Not knowing how things ended on a staged TV show with complete strangers that I'll never meet is apparently just too much for me to bear.

    2. So, I never watched the last This is Us episode (Jack's funeral) because at the time it aired I was too overwhelmed with my own life that I didn't think I could handle it. I just watched it when I was home on my lunch hour. God, I love and hate that show at the same time. I feel like I need to just sleep the rest of the day because I am too emotionally fried after watching that episode. Like, done. Ugggghhhhhh.

    3. I had my first Deva Curl salon appointment on the weekend and I wish I had done it waaaayyy sooner. My hair has been straight as an arrow my entire life but went wavy/curly after my last loss out of nowhere and I had no idea how to manage it. I am so glad I went and got schooled on how to treat and style my hair because I LOVE it! Now, to afford all the Deva Curl products which are stupid expensive in Canada (much like everything else....). 
    Me: 35 I DH: 38
    *TW loss and children mentioned*
    DD:2006 | Dx: Unexplained Secondary Infertility | DS: 2011

    TFAS since 2012

    Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C
    Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
    May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
    Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
    Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
    Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
    Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
    Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen  
    Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
    Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201  Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715 U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125!
    EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
    My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019 <3 

  • edited February 2018

    @ tosh24 ME!!  I'm like that with any show!  Even if I have watched five seasons and the show is really starting to suck but there's a season six...I have to watch it.  Apparently I need closure :) 

    I've heard so many good things about This is Us, but there's no way I could handle it emotionally.  I listen to the spoilers on the radio and that's enough for me.

    I've never even heard of Deva Curl...off to Google it now.  So strange that your hair changed like that!

    ETA: available at Sephora, yeah that means expensive!  Have you tried Amazon.ca?

  • @bakerstreetboys I’m not sure which is worst thinking Thursday is Friday or feeling like Monday.  

    @tosh24 and @bakerstreetboys you are not alone I too have to finish it.  I just recorded the last 10 minutes of Bargain Mansions.  Us gals like closure.  I have never heard of Deva Curl either.  My sisters hair did that though it was straight no body until her first pregnancy then it went frizzy curly 

    as for this is us I love that show.  I cry all the time watching it and usually have to watch a home improvement show afterwards just so I’m not so sad 
  • I watched the first season of This is Us, I don’t know if I can handle the second season. I’m usually not emotional when watching tv shows and movies, but I was ugly crying every. single. episode. There’s no way season two is even worse (better?) in my head, but I KNOW it is. Not ready for that!
  • @Mack2342 & @bakerstreetboys Glad I'm not alone!

    @grebretso See, sometimes I just need a good cry and I find watching This is Us cathartic because I am not an emotional person otherwise so it's a good excuse to let the tears flow. But, yeah, Season 2 is definitely not any less emotional than Season 1! @Mack2342 Yeah I do that too! I need something lighthearted after!

    @bakerstreetboys Yeah I checked out Amazon! Definitely the cheapest place I've found so far, but still expensive. Buuuut after I saw what my hair could do with some good product tailored for curly hair, I think it's worth it. Just having trouble pulling the trigger because I know it will be upwards of $200-250 for everything I need....
    Me: 35 I DH: 38
    *TW loss and children mentioned*
    DD:2006 | Dx: Unexplained Secondary Infertility | DS: 2011

    TFAS since 2012

    Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C
    Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
    May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
    Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
    Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
    Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
    Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
    Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen  
    Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
    Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201  Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715 U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125!
    EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
    My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019 <3 

  • @tosh24 Oof, that's a lot, but it will probably last a long time!  I think with all the stress of TTC, it's important to treat yourself once in a while :)  I went pixie short a few years ago and loved how fast it was in the mornings.  Of course then I got bored and decided to grow it out, which took forever!  Now I'm getting lazy again and pulling it back in a ponytail.  Oh well, whatever :)

    @grebretso I meant to say on another board, enjoy Black Panther!  It's really good!
  • February is the shortest month and yet every year it feels like it's the longest! So happy to be heading into March! Spring is just around the corner!!
  • Yes!!! Yay for March, @Kath525!
  • I’m annoyed today that I’m not KU.  I’m annoyed with my job.  Just all around in pissy mood 
  • @Mack2342 sorry today is rough. It absolutely sucks that you're not knocked up!

    Guys. My FIL got some little chicks! Pics in spoiler!


  • ble1ble1 member
    @Kath525 they are so cute. We have 7 chickens now, and when we went to get feed for them they had baby chicks at the store. Took all my will power not to get them.

    @Mack2342 I hate those days, where everything is just annoying. I like it when I get home on those days to just decompress for an hour or more
  • ble1 We also have chickens! 6 of them. And I really wanted to get some ducks a few days ago when we went to get more feed!  I LOVE ducks!!!

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.  Hopefully FET after that.

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • @kath525 Awww so cute! I wish I could have chickens where I live. Places around here are starting to change their bylaws to allow chickens in the 'burbs but my town hasn't so far. 

    On a somewhat related note, anyone try duck eggs? I'm allergic to chicken eggs and I hear that some people with chicken egg allergies can eat duck eggs. There's a duck farm not fat from my house so I think I'll pass by there and get some eggs. 
    Me: 35 I DH: 38
    *TW loss and children mentioned*
    DD:2006 | Dx: Unexplained Secondary Infertility | DS: 2011

    TFAS since 2012

    Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C
    Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
    May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
    Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
    Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
    Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
    Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
    Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen  
    Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
    Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201  Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715 U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125!
    EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
    My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019 <3 

  • ble1ble1 member
    @dpjennifer I want ducks too! We went to tractor supply for chicken food and they had baby ducks and chickens, so cute! 

    Tw

    Ds wanted kept pointing and grunting at them. I want to wait until he's a little bigger before we get them, so he can enjoy them.

    End tw
  • @tosh24 My parents used to raise ducks, so I've had LOTS of duck eggs! They're quite good, but expensive if you have to buy them. I don't have an egg allergy, so I can't attest to whether it would be better or not for you. But they are larger and denser with a slightly nutty taste sometimes. 

    @ble1 My dad bought me 6 white peeking ducks when I was 3 1/2 years old. I played with them and they followed me around like I was their mama! One of the best experiences of my life! Of course, I was sort of a 'farm girl' so yes, at 4 years old I got to experience the cycle of life... but they were tasty!

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.  Hopefully FET after that.

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • I have to do an escape room team building exercise this morning and I am so not in the mood.  I just want to sit at my desk and sniffle quietly to myself.
  • @bakerstreetboys I hate when you are forced to do something especially team building.  But escape rooms are fun. I have done them a couple times 
  • @Mack2342 It was more that I was dreading the forced socialization because I'm having a crappy TTC day.  The escape room part of it was fun :)
  • @bakerstreetboys agreed that’s the worst. 
  • @bakerstreetboys Glad you had fun, even though you were having a rough TTCAL day. I hate forced social/teambuilding activities!

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.  Hopefully FET after that.

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • Anyone else go through insane hair loss after MC? I thought I was getting out of the shower bald this morning. 
  • prpl11butterfly Apparently a 'symptom' of PG can be that you don't tend to lose your hair during it... so sometimes after a MC your body tries to catch up and you lose a TON of hair at once!

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.  Hopefully FET after that.

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • Tw* PP and children mentioned

    I went through this after having DS and while on nexplanon

    But I didn't think it would happen after such a short time. I didn't actually get to the point of not losing hair so it was kind of shocking to think of lose so much. And at once. 

  • It's the first day of spring and it's still -17 here, blah!  I'm ready for some warm weather!  At least it's sunny....
  • @bakerstreetboys we are a little warmer 34 but getting snow and ice today. I’m over it 
  • edited March 2018
    I've got 13 here. But it was 9 when I left home. 

    Eta our snow starts tomorrow
  • Questions for anyone whose had a D&C.

    Surgery was on the 1st. I spotted for about 12 days after surgery. Had nothing for 2 days and then just a little bit more on the 15th. On Tuesday I started having some cramping. This continued into yestersay and was accompanied by some slightly pink EWCM (only when wiping) in the am. Both still happening today with the cramps being more "intense" and color more on the light brown side. If this were a normal cycle, I'd expect AF on the 30th. I feel like it's to early for AF so is it more likely that this is from the surgery still?
  • After my first MC I bled off and on for about a month. It seemed like every time I exercised that month I had brown spotting or if I exerted self more. It took about 6 weeks to get first AF.  My last two MC were different in that I didn’t bleed that much and didn’t have the off and on bleeding 
  • prpl11butterfly I barely had any bleeding or spotting after my D&C. So, I can't advise on that. However, the first cycle after my D&C I had VERY painful ovulation cramps... I seriously used to think people who could 'tell' what side they were ovulating on and got cramps were full of crap, but now I sometimes get cramps too. Oddest thing ever, but apparently this can be very common after a D&C, especially the first few cycles afterwards. So, that could be what you're feeling. 

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.  Hopefully FET after that.

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • @Mack2342 I haven't really done anything extra but that makes a lot of sense.

    @dpjennifer just in case it is O related, I'll have to jump DH tonight. I did have a temp dip this morning but really thought after (what I think was) a 3rd attempt at O my body would have accepted this month wasn't happening. My mind has accepted it. But just for good measure right?
  • @prpl11butterfly totally agree with @dpjennifer my ovulation cramps that month were unreal! I can now always tell when I ovulate just by feel, however the pain is less than that first month.
  • @prpl11butterfly I had lots of spotting/streaking in my CM even the second cycle after my MC.
  • So I'll chalk it up to normal strangeness. It's crazy how much something like this changes your body and how it functions. But I'm still gonna jump DH tonight (ya know, just in case  ;) )
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