Weekly Questions [1/22]

sunshineandwhiskey

abteamb

So I've been watching all these birth documentaries. It's really making me question whether or not I want to have a drug free birth. I had an epidural with DD1. Part of me wants to have all natural at the hospital. Has anyone else started thinking about drugs during labor?

doxiemoxie212

@abteamb I wanted to do the in-hospital birth center, but I never got off the waitlist, and I'm 21 weeks now, so not an option now. I think on regular L&D it will be hard to remain med-free the entire time, so instead I'm going to set a goal with my OB for dilation, time, etc.  I've also heard from a lot of ladies here that for some women, you don't progress well with an epidural, but for some women you don't progress well without an epidural. Obviously it's sort of like salt in cooking - you can add more, but you can't take it away - so I'll see how far I can get/how well I do without an epidural first, and then evaluate as we go. (Obviously this assumes I go into labor on my own in non-emergent scenarios, which is certainly not guaranteed.) 

krash_

@abteamb I have had a couple moments while reading Ina May's Guild to Childbirth or in Bradley classes where I'm like "I'm not going to be able to do this. This is terrifying." I am also doing an in hospital birth so the option will be there and I don't want to completely rule it out. Honestly, I am more concerned with getting induced with pitocin than I am with an epidural. If you haven't already, I would definitely find a birth class and birth support. I have never done this before and I don't necessarily think it is something that my body just intellectually knows how to do, so I am learning about the process and techniques and I'm going to have the support of my husband and a doula that know what I want. I know that in the heat of intense pain and emotion it will be hard for me to advocate for myself or process what the dr's are telling me in an emergent situation. 

In the end, you just have to learn about all your options and do what feels right for you. 

becca_123

@abteamb I've thought about it a little bit and I am interested in also starting to watch birth documentaries - where do you find them, YouTube?  At my scheduled OB appointment today they asked me if I had thought about what kind of labor I wanted.  I really intended on just letting the nurses/doctor do their thing as I'm totally OK with having a medicated birth (it's my first and the whole labor part is making me nervous!).  But I also feel I should take more charge of my own body and actually make some informed decisions about what I specifically want.  As @krashke said, I'm OK with an epidural but it's actually the pitocin that makes me nervous!  I've looked into birthing classes and I'll definitely be signing up for those soon.  

abteamb

@doxiemoxie212 @krashke @becca_123

I was induced with Pitocin with DD1. I had HBP and I was already 39 weeks. My doc was worried that it might turn into Pre-E if I wasn't induced. Due to the pitocin, I think my contractions were more painful than natural (that's what I've heard, obv not sure). I did trust my doc. I think since I was so scared since I was a FTM I didn't trust my body as much as I do now. I had a very care free, stress free birth. I have nothing but good memories. However, I'm wondering if I'll be physically and mentally more prepared this time to go naturnal. Of course, if there aren't any imenent dangers. I've seen a couple on Amazon Prime. I highly recommend one called Motherland. It's about giving birth at a public hospital in Philippines. It is kinda graphic and thought provoking. Also one called Being pregnant in America. 

ramennoodlegif

@abteamb I am having the same dilemma. I had an epidural with both, but DS was a VBAC and I couldn't feel to push, which led to me push maybe a little too vigorously. I think I may opt first for something a little lighter than an epidural, maybe an analgesic, to reduce but not eliminate pain, and see where it goes from there. I got both epidurals at 8 cm. so I will hopefully have the option of really thinking it through beforehand.

@krashke +1 for the doula 


 

MissKittyDanger

Dumb question for STM - robe in hospital bag. Good idea, or useless?

Is there going to be a post about hospital bags? Something that STM can let us FTM know what is necessary and what is completely useless despite what people claim?

doxiemoxie212

@MissKittyDanger yes, in April-ish. Here's the schedule: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1gjNtxy2Kd2JceTYYR5wkwVcpTbU-khgazhjcZnfI1y4/edit#gid=0 

abteamb

@MissKittyDanger I packed one in my bag, but never used it. I would highly recommend some comfy pjs. The type that is like a button down shirt. It made it really easy for BF and doing skin to skin. I put DD1 on my chest and just buttoned my pajama shirt so she could be as close as possible. As far as using the robe before/during labor, I just used the hospital robe Bc i didn't want to get it dirty/stained.

Things that I brought the first time and am bringing again are hairbrush, hair ties, toothbrush, toothpaste, basic toiletries including small shampoo, cond, body wash, etc, chapstick or lipgloss, nipple cream, extra underwear, comfy slippers, 2 sets of pjs, sweat pants and sweat shirt for when leaving hospital.  

lisa2589

@MissKittyDanger I did love having a light robe with me at the hospital to wear over my nursing gown the first day when visitors came, and for ambulating in the hallway as well. It also came in handy at home afterward for MOTN feedings. 

And yes I agree on doing a hospital bag thread. Something like that helped me a lot the first time and I would probably learn something new this time around too! Maybe around beginning of 3rd trimester??

MissKittyDanger

doxiemoxie212 said:

@MissKittyDanger yes, in April-ish. Here's the schedule: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1gjNtxy2Kd2JceTYYR5wkwVcpTbU-khgazhjcZnfI1y4/edit#gid=0 

I checked and must have missed that! Thanks!

MissKittyDanger

@abteamb I may have to find a new pj top by your suggestion and you mention you'll be bringing 2 pjs, any reason or "just in case" ?

dinodna3

@abteamb So I haven’t had an epidural with DD but I did get pitocin and IV pain meds when I stalled at 6cms at around 28hrs of labor. She didn’t come for around 4 hours or so, I guess it’s not total drug free but the not an epidural birth. With DS, I had a completely drug free birth and it was pretty much the same pain level but felt so much easier because I knew what was happening. You can can always plan to go drug free but just leave the option open in case you change your mind mid labor.

For me, labor was wayyy shorter the second time around and I spent almost all of the 4hr labor laboring at home. When we were heading to the hospital with him, I actually commented to DH that I might get an epidural this time because I was in so much pain. Turns out I was transitioning on the way to the hospital (10 min drive) and I was pushing like 15 mins after we arrived at the hospital. 

@doxiemoxie212 I think as long as you are Strep B negative, you can have a med free birth at the hospital with no issue. I was very against getting an epidural with my first (because I’m terrified of the shot in the spine, not the due to wanting med free) and they never pressured me to have one. I got the pitocin and IV meds because I stalled and was Strep B positive. My hospital only lets you have 24hrs once your water breaks, if you are positive. 

doxiemoxie212

@dinodna3 I don't necessarily think they'll pressure me to get an epidural or meds, but I don't think they'll be particularly understanding of my choice not to either, if that makes sense. I feel like most nurses/OBs are sort of like, "Well I don't really understand why you're putting yourself through this, but whatever you want..." which is super different from what the in-hospital birth center would be like since meds aren't allowed there (if you need them, you're transferred to reg L&D). 

abteamb

@MissKittyDanger yes I took 2 of the same exact pjs Bc BF can be a little messy at first. Especially when your milk comes in. I hate the feeling of wet milk on my pjs when BFing. Also baby spit up, etc. I always felt more comfortable if i at least felt clean while in the hospital. I was only there 2 1/2 days. Of course, i probably would've been fine with just the one, but I liked a new one each day. Also I stayed in them all day, so yeah lol

jsl82

Jumping in to the hospital bag conversation- this could have been the most helpful thread I read last time, so very excited for the post to come around again.  April seems like a good time, as most of us will be starting to really prepare around April.  As a STM I have the odd feeling I'll be shoving stuff in a bag while I'm in labor, while last time it was packed and waiting for a month.

For the robe I would say it would be your comfort level.  I am ALWAYS cold (even a little chilly during pregnancy) so having the robe for my winter baby was key to my own comfort.  You will have visitors- unless you live really far from all of your friends and family- so if you are a modest person you may feel more comfortable with the robe as well.  I would say that under pacing for the hospital is better than over-packing.  You get to take home all of the items from the hospital so save room in your bag for newborn diapers (especially if you are looking like you will have a big baby and don't want to buy too many newborn diapers), all of the post partum items like the fashionable mesh underwear, and newborn care items (syringe bulbs, wipes, combs, craddle crap brush, baby blankets, ect).

I also will say that I had an epidural with DD and plan to have one with DS as well- it was the last time I was able to get a REALLY good sleep.  I'm so looking forward to my epidural nap.  I also tested positive for Strep B last time, and have already tested positive this time around too- so looks like I'll be medicated once again.

May14th2011

@doxiemoxie212 I think you'll be surprised. My drs were very okay with me going natural. They never even mentioned an epidural until I asked for it. I know the common thought is that doctors are actively trying to intervene as much as they can, but I haven't found that to be true. 

glitterfingers

@abteamb my advice is to develop preferences on pain meds but be prepared for multiple scenarios. Here are some examples from my mom and three bridesmaids at my wedding:

- baby comes so quickly there is no time for an epidural or time for it to start working
- epidural doesn’t work fully or much at all
- labor doesn’t progress, baby starts to show signs of distress and doctors are strongly encouraging you to get a c section before it becomes a real emergency c section (this actually happened to two of my friends).
-birth goes well but followed by hemorrhaging and emergency surgery.

My point is not to scare anyone but maybe I have some really unlucky friends who have at least prepared me somewhat for not so great situations.

Yes to @doxiemoxie212 suggestion of setting check in goals.

rnielsen321

I too loved my epidural nap @jsl82

I was induced early, and had a foley, water break, followed by pitocin. Epidural after that. And I was so scared for the needle! Grand scheme they had a harder time getting the iv line in. Then I napped! Glorious. It was when DDs heart rate stayed too high, the turned down the pitocin, and turned down epidural when it was time to push. No complaints (from me).  

I found the doctors/nursing staff to be helpful, knowledgeable, and all around experts at this stuff. 

llamamama14

@jsl82 @rnielsen321 I totally would have taken an epidural nap (I labored overnight on an epi) but I was afraid baby would start crowning and I wouldn't be awake to call for the nurses. I'm crazy. 

Question: (I think this may have been discussed before, sorry.) Is anyone taking B6 and/or B12 for energy? I started taking B6 last week because I was feeling fatigued and I had some B6 on hand from treating morning sickness. It's definitely been helping, I'm just wondering if a B complex would be even more helpful. I know iron could be an issue but I'm going to wait and have my blood tested before I start iron because I want to have an accurate assessment of whether it's an issue and also want to avoid the constipating effects if possible.

twelvetwosomeonenew

Tagging won't work on my phone. Grrrr.  

Robe -- I packed one, but never pulled it out of my bag. However, I did wear a light sweater for nearly my entire hospital stay over my nursing tank. I changed out of my gown asap. 

&& I was just talking to my husband about how my energy level just isn't coming up like I'd expect in second tri, so maybe some B6 would help! 

izza2

I'm glad no one else did that I saw, but can we try not refer to an unmedicated birth as "natural"? It's inaccurate and tends to shame women who use medication during birth into feeling like they had an "unnatural" birth.
Pet peeve.

I'll be opting for a med-free birth, but I'm also open to pain medication that's not an epidural. I know they don't take too much time, but I've heard mixed reviews on effectiveness, and I've watched a needle bend as they put it in the spine for an epidural, and that helped kill any thoughts of getting one.
I don't know what my hospital's policies are in terms of what pain medications they'll administer during labor, but I've been trying to do my own research on options and choose which ones I'm strongly opposed to and which ones I'd be okay with if I needed medication.

I will say, however, that I don't want to be induced or put on Pit to "move things along" unless there's a valid risk to me or my child in not being induced. And that would have to be after doing everything I could to advance labor without the use of Pit (moving, squats, rocking, changing positions, walking, etc.).

chartermama

I Have a couple of travel dates coming up. One is around 27 weeks which is a long flight for work and the other is around 28 weeks and this is a road trip (vacation). Has anyone ever traveled later in their pregnancy? I don’t know what to expect. My doc mentioned taking precautions for blood clots and making sure to move around and take lots of breaks.

llamamama14

@chartermama If you want to be prepared, look up the specific airline's policy on pregnant travelers and print it out so you can show it to any staff who aren't familiar with their own policy. Also have a letter from your OB stating your due date and that you are cleared to fly. I think at 27 weeks you're outside of any airline's restrictions but it's good to be prepared. I have flown at 30 and 35 weeks with Delta (they have no restrictions and require no medical certificate.) For the 35 week trip I still brought a print out of their policy and a doctor's letter just in case.

I felt fine during the flights other than the normal pregnancy discomfort/ trying to sleep on a plane. I didn't have any swelling but I'm not prone to it during pregnancy. 

doxiemoxie212

@chartermama I am currently still low risk, and my OB is 100% fine with me flying until 35 weeks. From my experience flying during this pregnancy already (NY to CA and back at 8/9 weeks and 16/19 weeks), I have to pee so frequently that getting up often isn’t really an issue. Being comfortable certainly might be, so if you can upgrade your seats even slightly I’d say you won’t regret it, but I personally wouldn’t worry tremendously about flying before 30 weeks. Also re: road trips, just plan to need to pee a lot. We just did a road trip NY to DC and back which is like 4 hours each way, and we stopped a lot more frequently than we would have otherwise. But scar trip, especially if you can recline your seat, should be fine IMO. 

LaceyBee522

@chartermama I think the advice from @llamamama14 and @doxiemoxie212 is on point. I'll just add that my doctor suggested compression socks for any flights over an hour long. She also said I should stand and walk frequently during the flight - which as others have suggested shouldn't be a problem because you have to pee so much. For that reason, I've switched from a window seat girl to an aisle seat girl. Also, on this last flight, I noticed that the seat belt was clearly getting shorter on me (I'm  bigger to begin with, so you might not have this problem), but don't be afraid to ask for a seat belt extender if you feel squished. 

doxiemoxie212

@LaceyBee522 @chartermama and everyone else: and seatbelts should always go UNDER your Bump. Don’t ever put it on top or round the middle! 

LaceyBee522

What @doxiemoxie212 said. I think I'm needing the extender because my hips have gotten wider. 

katie121209

Is it too early for Braxton Hicks? I remember getting them around 30 weeks last time but a few times in the last week I’ve felt a deep slow contraction. 

for those flying southwest, we got terrible boarding numbers last pregnancy and I was really worried about not getting an aisle seat and having to pee a ton. They let me board the plane first with DH under the people who need special assistance thing so I was able to sit aisle and very close to the bathroom. 

marcus7676

@katie121209 not at all. I never had them with DS and I've had them since 18 weeks this time.  I asked my doctor and she said BHs were very common early on for STM+.

doxiemoxie212

I was about to buy a homestudy course for hypnobirthing, but then realized that hypnobirthing and hypnobabies are different programs?? Anyone have any experience as to which one is preferable...?

catlady1215

@katie121209 I think I've had some. its mostly in the evenings and hasn't been daily.

mytinc

I didn't bring a robe, special pjs or anything with DS1.  He was born around 4:45 on a Friday evening in the hospital gown.  Saturday I showered mid-morning and got dressed with a nursing tank, zip up sweatshirt and comfortable maternity shorts (May baby).  We drove home Saturday evening.  The only thing I would say is that you may want to have a nice outfit/shirt, etc. on hand if your hospital has a photographer that comes around for newborn pictures.  I didn't buy any, but there were some cute pictures of DS1 and a couple of DH and I holding him.  I wouldn't want to do pictures like that in pajamas.

chartermama

@Llamamama @doxiemoxie212 @LaceyBee522 thanks for the advice! I feel so much more at ease knowing what I need to bring. I will definitely grab some compression socks and request the seatbelt extender.

@katie121209  I feel bad for whomever is in the aisle if I don’t get that seat bc I already have to pee every 5 seconds. I can’t imagine how bad it will be when the baby is bigger! I’m going to log in and see if I can pick my seat.

PatientlyWaiting10

Jumping in on the med/non med birth...DD was sunny side up and I had an epidural...so glad I did even though it slowed down my delivery.  I would have had a C-Section if I hadn't had an epidural I think.  And with DS, I got to the hospital and was at a 9 so no time for it!  I'm not sure what I'll do this time around.... 

As for a robe in the bag - I would say no, but I never wear one at home so I wouldn't wear one there either.  I brought a few nursing tanks and just wore those as well as my fav zip up sweatshirt.  Then if I was cool I could wear that but still easily access my skin/nipples (or if people were visiting) but I mostly hung out in my nursing tank and my comfy loose fitting BLACK capris.  Highly recommend slippers/socks/something for your feet.  I get grossed out walking on floors with bare feet.  Ew.  :P 

marcus7676

I never felt pushed for an epidural at the hospital - - if anything, the midwife tried discouraging it.  She only gave in when I was clearly in transition and struggling through back labor (sunny side up baby).  So you may be surprised by what happens at the hospital - I think it all depends on the practitioner.

I did bring a robe to the hospital and put it on once over my gown. I actually never changed out of the gown because of the shape I was in.  

doxiemoxie212

So a nurse just called me to tell me that my last blood test came back as slightly low AFP, so I might want to consider an amnio....... but like, my mat21 results and all my ultrasounds were negative, so............. she's just cray, right? 

amys614

@doxiemoxie212 she's probably cray. I think they have to give you all your options based on each specific test. Is it going to worry you for the next 18 or so weeks if you don't test further or do you feel like you're at a calm place about it? *if that's possible when they tell us stuff like that* I feel like that would be my determining factor--my sanity.

I started the process with the NT scan and some blood test in the 1st tri that all came back normal. My doctor reminded me there's a last blood draw, AFP, in 2nd tri to finish up my screening, but I skipped it. It's not going to change anything and seeing all these scares in our group, where the results end up being fine, has me feeling like sometimes all the stuff we can find out so early makes us crazy. 

Hugs to you. 

Edited to add: everything I've been reading says AFP test in and of itself can be very misleading. If you've had no other markers, I'd try to not be too concerned. 

krash_

@doxiemoxie212 it is my understanding that the AFP would be used to asses risk in conjunction with a number of different tests. A low result alone I wouldn't think would be enough to say that there is a risk or that you should do an amnio. I would definitely get more information from your Dr or have a perinatologist review all of your scans and tests. 

I hope you can get more information quickly. I hate that it seems so many of us have had to go through this for no reason. FX for you! 

doxiemoxie212

@amys614 @krashke I think the nurse just wasn't used to having someone already have mat21 results, etc., with AFP. All of my scans are done by a perinatologist, actually, (which I only know because they send you to the room next door which is labeled PERINATOLOGY lol and then a lab tech scans for a million hours and then a doc comes in, introduces herself as the perinatologist and reviews them, and then they call your OB and she reviews them, so its.... lengthy, and in real time in front of us), so I feel pretty confident that my scans are good. And I've read that 5% of women will come back with a positive AFP result, but 90% of those women will have "normal" babies. My next OB appointment is Feb 14, so obv I'm sure we'll talk about it, but I feel mostly like uhhh okay whatever about it. Pretty sure my mom's AFP came back positive with me (going to call her shortly) since she had to have a CVS test. DH's mom it def came back positive for one of the boys because she had an amnio. Nothing was ever actually abnormal once we were born, so...

Like, I get why they still do the AFP test even with mat21 because a high level can mean spina bifida and some other issues that mat21 doesn't test for, but a low level is one of the indicators of down syndrome which should be able to be ruled out by mat21, NT scan and anatomy scan as extremely unlikely (which is what has happened in my case). Annoying,