Laboring experiences - medicated/ un-medicated

bcliffee1

I am hoping to have an un-medicated birth . I am a FTM and wondering what has worked for other moms with experience in this department but also would love insight from mommas who have had medicated births. I am keeping my mind open to options because not everything goes as planned.  If you have any suggestions on things to do prior or tips/tricks to how you got through it that would be great. 

Note: this is meant to be a board for positivity and past experiences. We all have differing opinions but I just want everyone to be respectful on a very touchy subject. Thank you - from a very overwhelmed FTM with lots of questions 

danjoly

I don’t have anything to chip in but I would just love if we could use “un medicated” birth instead of “natural”. I know it’s not done to cause any harm but a lot of girls in this group might have to go through birth not the way they want to or would have preferred and the term “natural” kind of imply using medication or having a csection is unnatural which is not the case! 

riversdoctor

I’d be happy to share anything re: the differences between my failed epidural and unmedicated deliveries via pm but as you can see this is a very touchy subject and I’m not willing to risk offending someone over perceived negative connotations in the public forum. 

nessa1632

@babyclarke429 What if you repost and ask specifically for advice on preparing for an unmedicated birth? It seems like a shame to not solicit such advice bc of said perceived negative connotations (one way or another) especially given that there is likely a pool of sage advice and wisdom from others that people could benefit from. I feel like every topic in pregnancy and childbirth could be value evaluated but it doesn’t have to be.... 

i personally am preparing by reading mindful birthing and the Ina May Gaskins guide. DH is reading The birth partner.

edited for spelling.. twice... bc pregnancybrain 

bcliffee1

@danjoly @riversdoctor @nessa1632 absolutely I certainly am not looking to offend or discourage anyone. I am not sure how to edit but I will try to change it to something open to all mommas and all birthing options. I am curious to hear about all experiences. Certainly we all have a plan but baby does what baby wants and every way of having a baby is certainly natural. Thank you for the recommendation to change subject 

Dumbgurl04

I was induced with my first and had an epi.  I know everyone has a different experience when it comes to the epi and getting pitocin.  With me I feel I progressed well.  I received mine at 7-8 in the morning and my daughter was born at 230 in afternoon that same day.  The only scary thing that happen was after my epi was my heart rate and DD's heart rate dropped and they gave me oxygen to see if that would help before they took me in for an emergency c-section, which it did.  It's good that you are going into it with an open mind.  Best thing to do is learn as much as you can about meds used at birth and possible side effects, techniques for going un-medicated and when asking for meds will be to late, also learn about c-sections.  

ngolimento

In general, I think it is good to go in with goals, because it forces you to do research and be prepared.  However, it is extremely unhealthy to treat said goals as proof that you "won" or were "tough" or did it "right".    Birth is going to happen whatever way it pleases, so going in with a flexible and healthy attitude is going to make the difference between feeling like your birth was a failure or traumatic experience, and feeling proud of the massive undertaking you achieved.

I personally went in guns-ablazing for a unmediated birth with the fewest possible interventions.   Then my body refused to go into productive contractions on its own, even at 42 weeks.  By the time I had hung in there for 12 hours unmediated active labor (beyond a drug to open my cervix), I was so exhausted that my pain threshold just went through the floor, and I was like "just give me whatever the hell it takes to get this done".

That's why I get irritated when women idolize others who go unmediated, like they did it better or are heroes.  Like, ok, some chick who hung in there for 3 hours of early labor, then 3 hours of active, does not get adulation and hero status while my ass, who went through 24 hours of early labor, then about 12 hours of active labor before giving in to medication, gets "failure" status.  Nope, that attitude can go to hell.

icalynn

I am also a FTM hoping for an unmediated birth. In preparation we are planning to hire a doula and I have also been reading the book Natural Hospital Birth: The Best of Both Worlds.

petethecat

@babyclarke429 I just bumped an older thread where STMs were discussing previous births vs what they planned to do this time. I'm not sure if you've seen it, but it discusses books to read and labor experiences, so I think it might be helpful. I feel like a lot of the answers and discussion may be helpful in sorting through some of your questions too. 

luna8433

My DS birth story is in the thread @kbamomma33 bumped but I wanted to add that it is good to go in with a plan but don't be upset if that plan does not happen. The goal is to deliver safely and to do what we need to to get that baby here. My goal was to go as long as possible unmedicated if possible the whole labor, but after 48+ hours of prelabor my body was under to much stress and was affecting the babies heart rate. The doctors recommended an epidural to help. At that point all I wanted was to sleep and was worried abour DS, so I took it. I am glad I did, I got some rest which allowed me to be refreshed when it actually came time to push and only pushed for 10 minutes. 

So listen to your body and the doctor's and be an advocate for yourself.

lindsye

I just bumped a previous post about people’s previous experience with epidurals, specifically, (good and bad) in case that helps

srose2917

Beautifully said !!! Good observation! The different words substituted makes ALL THE difference! I love the word “unmedicated” so much more esp because all births and choices are equally as powerful and unique 

lesliegolem

Yes I as well planned my first to be unmedicated. But labor stalled and didn't progress so my Dr wanted to start pitocin. I remember being in immense pain, shaking bed rails pain and only 5 cm dilated and the my nurse said to me "The contractions you are having are stronger contractions because of the pitocin. There are no awards at the end of this for going unmedicated." Basically things hadn't gone as planned so why was I trying to stick with the plan still if there was something that could help. The epidural was like a wave of sweet relief. I still felt everything but the pain wasn't so intense until I got closer to 10 cm dilated. So for me basically epidurals yay! I got one with my 2nd as well because once again, water broke but labor stalled. So totally plan on getting one with my 3rd.

I will add to this though I'm not scientifically sure if contractions are worse on pitocin? It is some thing to consider if you end up needing it. Also my girlfriend had an epidural that did not take and she ended up feeling a good portion of her c section. So they're definitely not perfect. Like the comments above have a birth plan but be prepared to stray from it and be educated because anything can happen. 

sparklingdiamond

I went in planning to be medicated.  My water broke in the middle of the night, but I wasn't really having contractions at the time.  My labor ended up stalling and they gave me Pitocin.  At that point I knew for sure I needed an epidural.  I would have preferred to not have the Pitocin, but understood why they gave it to me.  

riversdoctor

I will add my two cents, I’m terrified of another epidural. I went in with my first with the mentality not to be a hero. When it gets bad just get the medication. BIG mistake. I was stuck on my back for the rest of labor which was the worst possible position and while I was paralyzed from the epi I felt no relief except my left thigh was numb.  Nobody would believe me including the ob administering stitches after I delivered!  I just screamed. 

With ds ds I went into labor with the mentality that there was no other option. I learned a ton of Med free coping strategies (kneeling and water worked the best for me, along with block breathing.  Massage, focus points, essential oils were useless). I labored at home as long as I could and by the time I went in it was too late to get an epidural even if I had wanted one (I was already almost to 9cm). Transition was rough and I definitely felt like I lost control a bit, but in the end 45 min of out if control pain was way better than 9 hours of out of control pain with the epi. Basically I think what helped was staying home as long as possible.  With my first they pushed pitiocin, and My perceived pain was much worse with nurses constantly asking if I was ready for meds vs breathing through on my own. 

All that said, I’m looking at induction at 36-37 weeks this time and I have no idea what to expect. Pit sucks but is likely necessary, and the thought of another failed epidural still scares the heck out of me. 

midnight-muse

I had an epidural withy son (it fell out of my back before pushing) and all the medication I could get. The whole experience of labour to giving birth was terrible to put it lightly. 
I spent most of my labour at home with my daughter. I only had diamorphine and gas and air during her labour at the hospital. Her birth was very calm with only one midwife present.
With this little girl I'm crossing everything for a home water birth. Hopefully just gas and air. I'm confident I can do it without any medication. It's always either made me vomit or made me feel like I have no control.

millieb14

Had an epidural that wore off (didn’t push the button to keep it going) so I felt everything. Epidural was fine and helped with contractions. No issues with it and I think it may have helped me relax and progress to the pushing part. Didn’t brother me at all and I HATE needles. 

Feeling every single part of my daughters face come out was crazy but also very cool. Yes, it really hurt. But you just do it because you don’t have a choice and we are women and we are amazing!!!

no epidural for the stitching part did suck though.

this time around I will probably do the same thing. Get epidural to help me relax (if I need it) then let it wear off if I feel like it. I know every hospital is different and epidural set-up is different but I liked that mine was basically a dial to turn up or down. 

mountainsmama

I had an unmedicated birth with my first and hope to again. I did a lot of research, took classes and practiced hypnobabies every day for the last couple months. In the end, the preparation helped me a ton but I also just got lucky. As has been said before, labor is so out of your control and babies come how they come. I also mentally made peace with my birth going another way, since I know people who had their heart set on a particular outcome and were devastated by an emergency C-section or whatever.
I think I wrote about my birth experience in that other forum, but the things that helped me were staying home as long as possible (in my case too long, since she was almost born in the car), so meds were not an option when I got the hospital, and the hypnobabies tapes. They really got me through active labor in a pretty calm state. Pushing was very intense, but fortunately for me was super quick, and I didn't tear enough to need any stitches. Again, that's just a factor of my body and baby and luck. I was surprised by how much everything really hurt in the immediate aftermath of labor. I was happy to be holding my baby but pretty shell-shocked by the pain. That fundal massage is no joke! But it didn't last too long, and I was happy to be able to get up and move around and shower afterward.

-T-

I wanted to have unmediated births but both were medicated. DS was an induction and I thought my deliveries would be just like my sister’s for some reason. All 4 of hers were 24-30 hours. My pitocin was started at 6am I started having really bad contractions and by 8:30am I asked for the epidural because I just couldn’t do it for another 20-something hours! He was born before 9:30am so I definitely went quicker than I thought! I hated the epidural so much. I felt nothing. I couldn’t tell if my pushing was doing anything productive and I hated not feeling my legs. 
DD was fast as well. I got what they called an intrathecal. It was 1 shot in the back which made the pain much more dull. I felt the contractions, I could tell when it was time to push and I could feel my legs! It was glorious.
I would love to go unmedicated this time, but if I give in again I will definitely do what I did with DD. 

capricelili

I would say it’s good to go in with an open mind. I had a doula and an awesome delivery nurse. I stalled out at 9cm for 6 hours, most likely because I was so tired from laboring all night with no sleep from when my contraction started the night before. I became very upset when the doctor started saying we would have to start pictocin since it would tie me to a chair and I knew I couldn’t keep laboring unmedicated if I couldn’t move around. The pain of the pic contractions was more than I could handle, thank goodness my nurse brought up using narcotics, they gave me these 1 hrs injections to deal with the pain. So we did one hour at a time of pic and narcotics for 3 hours. It was enough for me to get some rest and for the pic to open me up more so I could start pushing. I’m so glad the nurse brought up that suggestion, I know we talked about different pain management options in my birthing class but in the heat of the moment you forget everything! Also I did read Natural Hospital birth, that helped me for my plan for how I wanted it to go. Also read Ina May’s guide to childbirth. I didn’t realize how the mental aspect of it was going to affect me. I think I stalled out not just because I was tired but because I was still scared of the feeling of pushing. Seriously to me  it felt like you have to take a poop in front of a room full of people, at least in my mind. So I think it got hard for my body to relax and open up. Getting some rest and the pic definitely helped me get there that last mile. This time I’m going to study up on my hypno birth tapes, hoping that will help me relax to I can open up faster.