Weekly Questions 12/18

charlestonchew

When is the last time we had one of these or am I blind? I selfishly started with a question.

I've been having this weird pain and I'm trying to figure out what it is or if its a big deal. It normally happens after exerting myself but it feels like my uterus is aching. I describe it as similar to a stomach ache but my uterus. I feel it a lot around my belly button. Does anyone have something like this or does it warrant a call to the doctor? I don't usually call unless something serious. 

sandbar517

Obviously, you know we're going to say that if you're worried you should call your doctor anyway because none of us can say 100% for sure what it is.  However, it could possibly just be braxton-hicks.  I was never really able to tell the difference between BH and real contractions, because I had a ton of both with the girls, and they always felt the same to me.  I described it as feeling my uterus tightening, but more for me, I said it felt like Baby B (who was always laying side to side right along the top of my uterus) was arching her back up into the top of my uterus, and into my stomach/mid upper abdomen area.  I've been getting the same feeling lately, and my uterus is definitely not up that high yet.  It's a....pressure? nausea? feeling, very hard to describe, but now when it happens I just know what it is and don't really think much of it.  Definitely worth asking your doctor about, though. 

charlestonchew

@sandbar517 I wouldn't say that I'm necessarily worried about it, I just wanted to see if anyone could identify what was going on or if anyone else thought it was a cause for concern. I hate trying to describe feelings and pain because it's really different from person to person. I don't know if I would describe what I'm feeling is Braxton Hicks but not being used to them, I guess I don't really know. The best way I can describe it as like I said, like a sharp achy feeling.

sandbar517

@charlestonchew I totally understand.  It sounds like it could just be some early BH, which tend to happen (or get worse) after exertion and if you're dehydrated.  Most of the time they say to relax, drink some water and see if they go away.  

JNCPro3130

@charlestonchew, I had Braxton Hicks with DS.  My stomach would get really tight and then loosen.  It didn't really hurt like a contraction.  I just remember a weird sensation of everything tightening up for a couple of seconds and then it would be fine.  My belly button has hurt a few times this pregnancy.  lol That's been weird.

bwow615

I sometimes get a sharp pain in my lower uterus (what i imagine is my lower uterus).  and have been chalking it up to RLP.  I get it sometimes when i stand up to quickly.
Can RLP happen up that high, I have no idea... but maybe that's what you are feeling? 

charlestonchew

bwow615 said:

I sometimes get a sharp pain in my lower uterus (what i imagine is my lower uterus).  and have been chalking it up to RLP.  I get it sometimes when i stand up to quickly.
Can RLP happen up that high, I have no idea... but maybe that's what you are feeling?


SIB
 Maybe. Pregnancy is weird. I was having this weird pain that felt like ovulation pain and my doctor said it was that so maybe that's it. Shrug

holli0801

Agree with @sandbar517, sounds like BH, @charlestonchew. I’d try to rest and hydrate and see if that helps..

@bwow615 I don’t know for sure but my understanding is ligament pain is from stretching and shifting, so any pain in your belly or pelvic area could be LP? 

justsuzie

I get a pulsating thriving in my right lower groun for 10-15 minutes. I drink apt of water and it goes away. I think water is the cure for most things though. 



Have any of you stm noticed excercise helping with labor? I’ve been going to the gym 2-4 times a week and running on the weekends in hope that this will help
with delivery. I hate yoga but wonder if that’s maybe better? 

MissusTexas

@justsuzie Yes, it helps! I did zero exercise with my first but exercised all the way to 41 weeks with my 2nd. I didn’t do much yoga aside from some in my cool-down, but I did a lot of dance Fitness and HIIT classes. Both involved a lot of squats which are great for preparing you for labor. Recovery was way better, too. 

justsuzie

@MissusTexas I remember you mentioning you do the dance fitness.  So do I!  Really glad to know it helped you.  I will up my squats.

lincbeesmom

Not sure if it was mentioned in the last questions thread but anyone else itchy down there? I remember some people complaining about the extra discharge so that might be a part of it but I’ve been so itchy! And then i scratch like a dumbass then get irritated. Ugh. 

holli0801

@justsuzie I think any exercise will help with labor… and I’ve read it reduces traumatic labor /stress for the babes bc they are more used to the adrenaline and increased physical activity. In regards to yoga, I do think it helps with labor bc of the stretching and poses to open the pelvis. Also toward the end of pregnancy it helped me a lot with back pain (poses like Cat Cow) and swelling (poses that increase blood flow to the legs and feet etc) 

@lincbeesmom it was discussed. I would offer the suggestion of a vaginal probiotic to keep things balanced. My midwive has me take one a day and I can double up if I feel off balance. It has really helped me this pregnancy and I wish I would have used it with the first! 

JNCPro3130

@justsuzie, I didn't exercise last time, but I did sit in deep squats and I had a very quick labor (2hrs, 45 mins).  I tore a lot so maybe the exercise helps with that.  I'm upping my exercise this time around and will do the squats as well.

fraufarbissina

For anyone who worked and then decided to SAH after maternity leave (or plans to do that this time around), how do you go about it?  Do you call your boss during leave and tell them you're not coming back?  Or do you go back to work and give 2 weeks notice?  If we can make it work financially, I'm planning on not working after ML but not sure how the logistics will work.  

bwow615

@lincbeesmom @holli0801 i need to look into the probiotic... TMI I am suffering from the extra discharge and extreme itchiness at night especially.  It's so gross.  I know I read that it is a normal pregnancy symptom if there isn't an odor or texture change... but holy hell.  I hope this doesn't last the entirety of this pregnancy.  What brand do you use?

silverhope

@fraufarbissina I would carefully read your HR policy on maternity leave. Some places have requirements on how long you have to stay at the company post-maternity leave in order to receive the maternity benefits.

fraufarbissina

@silverhope thanks!  I've read through it a few times and haven't seen anything specifically about this but it has to be there right?  Its a tender subject so it's not like I can ask HR what the protocol is which is what I would normally do.  

justsuzie

holli0801 Did you do prenatal yoga, or regular? The prenatal seems so boring right now,....but maybe that's yoga in general for me.

@JNCPro3130 I am very small down there and I am terrified of tearing.  Some youtuber said to rub oil down there to prevent it but I'm not sure how much of that is good advice or just wishful thinking. 

^That being said, I apply almond oil 2x a day everywhere to help with stretch marks but it's too greasy.  Anyone have a rub or lotion they LOVE (vegan friendly)?

onesmallcoconut

@charlestonchew

Around the belly button pain. I had that too around week 20. It was more so an extreme sensitivity in that area. Clothing brushing against it hurt. So from what I found out in research aka dr. Google and a few preggo books was that the pain is from your uterus growing upwards and if you're a STM it can be worse because it has less stuff in the way to resist against inside so you feel it more. Also the bump app showed that between week 20 and 21 the baby grew like 4 inches. I imagine that's gotta impact the body a bit too. Mine eased up once I hit week 21.

Unless the pain is constant, it's probably fine. But of course contact your physician if you're worried at all! 

holli0801

@bwow615 femdopolis

@justsuzie I do regular mostly…  just because my schedule is weird and there are more options for regular classes. But I go to a place where all of the instructors really know what they’re doing. So if I can’t do something or need to modify they help. Prenatal is good for community... meeting other expecting moms and such. And great for learning things you can do at home to prepare for labor, as well as things to help with pain in labor. 

mamaimmoos

@fraufarbissina my employee handbook never officially said what the rules are but if you are planning to collect short term disability read through those rules.  My policy specified that in order to qualify I had to return to work after leave for at least one working day or I’d have to pay it back.  I worked for 6 months after my leave ended so I didn’t have any issues.  Also, technically any conversation you have with HR should be considered confidential so you should be able to ask “for informational purposes” and not fear any blow back.  I was got very technical when I quit my full time job but I was also being rebellious so...

rachelg777

@onesmallcoconut The reason the bump says baby grew so much is because measurements change from crown to rump to crown to feet after week 20. 

suchaglencoco

@justsuzie, maybe you should find the fisting thread on here for ideas. (Is it even still on here??) It has great tips. 
Just kidding. It's a huge joke, but it is a super funny thread to read when you have a lot of time on your hands!

Ceridwen77

@justsuzie I exercised religiously during my first pregnancy (6x a week - yoga, spin, lifting, cardio). I definitely think it helped with labor. Unfortunately this time I’m not able to work out as much being a working mom and then wanting to spend my spare time with my kiddo. But I’m still super active and do yoga at home. 

kpc914

@suchaglencoco omg the fisting thread is SOOOO good. Also, i totally giggled when you said how small you were down there @justsuzie. I believe you...hahah but, actually one of my friends said that same comment last week in regards to how small her vajay is and how she's scared for childbirth. We promptly mocked her "ohhh I'm sorry. is your vagina just soooooo tiny and tight?!" I couldn't help but smile reading your comment. On that note...i have also considered pre-oiling over the next few months. 

charlestonchew

@justsuzie @kpc914 I think there is a perineal massage you can do but I'm not sure it actually works. And I think a partner has to do it...

RachelT1234

mamaimmoos said:

@fraufarbissina my employee handbook never officially said what the rules are but if you are planning to collect short term disability read through those rules.  My policy specified that in order to qualify I had to return to work after leave for at least one working day or I’d have to pay it back.  I worked for 6 months after my leave ended so I didn’t have any issues.  Also, technically any conversation you have with HR should be considered confidential so you should be able to ask “for informational purposes” and not fear any blow back.  I was got very technical when I quit my full time job but I was also being rebellious so...


SIB!

Just want to give caution that discussions with HR are not typically confidential. Definitely check your FMLA policy, and any handbooks your employer has and address questions with HR (or ask them for copies of the policies) but just keep in mind that if you mention possibly not returning, HR may give your supervisor a heads up. (I'm in HR) 

onesmallcoconut

@rachelg777 oh man lol you're right. Clearly not paying attention here 

onesmallcoconut

charlestonchew said:

@justsuzie @kpc914 I think there is a perineal massage you can do but I'm not sure it actually works. And I think a partner has to do it...

That just reminds me of this scene in Baby Mama lol 

mileswithmyles

@justsuzie I think it helps. I had a long labor and three hours of pushing. I didn’t realize how long it was until it was all over and I think all my running helped me get through without being totally exhausted. I felt like marathon training helped me mentally with labor, too. I was able to get in my head and talk myself through a lot just like on long runs. 

ivyvines6

@justsuzie I hated prenatal yoga with a passion... So boring... I ended up switching to a beginner level class and modifying what I needed to and just moving slower into inverted positions/taking it easy when it felt necessary. 

fraufarbissina

@RachelT1234 that's what I was afraid of.  I'll just keep reading through all the policies I can find.  Once it gets closer to May I'll think of a tactical way to talk to my boss about all of the post-leave options I have.  

bjkay22

Question for STMs+ 

After the anatomy scan if everything is “normal” (I mean no concerns, no placenta placement issues, etc) how often will you have an US? I would assume there is another closer to the end to make sure baby is in position but Dr google isn’t giving me much. Obvioulsy I know it will vary from dr to dr but I’m just curious on a roundabout. I have a single pregnancy and no known risks as of now other than being obese but my doctor said it does not qualify me as high risk. I had an 8 week “viability” scan and now my AS is coming up. I would think there will be at least 1 more or can they tell the position of the baby without an US? 

Thanks! 

sandbar517

I'm actually wondering the same thing.  I had ultrasounds every two weeks with my twins, so I'm not sure how a "normal" pregnancy goes LOL  I do have a small part of my placenta covering my cervix, and the baby wasn't laying in the best position for all the heart pictures they wanted to get, so I'm guessing I'll have at least one or two more.  But I think they do at least one more to check growth and position closer to the due date....

bjkay22

@sandbar517 it was actually your post about your placenta placement that made me think of this question. My SIL has had HG with both pregnancies and because of that her dr orders ultrasounds every few weeks because she tends to pass out. Also her first was breech so she had several towards the end when they were trying different techniques to move her. Her second is due in April but she’s planning a repeat c section. So I feel like she’s not standard when it comes to US timing. 

Edit it to add: CONGRATS ON A BABY GIRL! I’m glad everything basically went ok. Keep us posted on when the repeat check is. Hopefully your placenta moves enough in the right direction. 

bwow615

I am pretty sure there should be at least one more... I remember getting an US somewhere after the 30 week range and DS was doing all sorts of acrobatic moves like having his legs up by his head. 

sandbar517

@bjkay22 Thank you!  I could see it on the screen, and there was definitely not too much covered, so I'm not worried, but I'll definitely keep you guys updated!  

mileswithmyles

@sandbar517 congrats on another girl!  

@bjkay22 I feel like I had one more ultrasound towards the end with DS to make sure he was in the right position, etc. 

bjkay22

Thank you! @mileswithmyles and @bwow615! 

I was thinking they would have to do one more at the beginning of third tri just to double check everything. 

okaykoala

Oh man, all you fit ladies are really making me want to stick to my new year's resolution of actually exercising. Walking just doesn't seem like I'm doing anything, even though people say it's good...

So, my question is this: I have a dear friend at work who desperately wants to be a mother. She's been open about how she won't feel complete until she has a child for as long as I've known her. But, for various reasons, she and her partner are unable to have children for at least the next couple of years. 

I know she'll be happy for me when I tell her about my pregnancy, but I also know it will cause her a lot of pain, which I hate. Do any of you who have been in similar situations (on either end) have advice on how to tell her? I know it will likely have a similar result either way, but I'd love to know how I can try and ease her pain.