@charlestonchew i thought I was overdoing it by picking a date for my DD’s 2nd birthday in February. That’s just...odd.
I had a friend straight up tell me I couldn’t come to their wedding but I was invited to the reception a few months after. Needless to say, I didn’t go. I was the only one in our tight knit group that was told to not come to the wedding. I’m STILL not over it.
@ivyvines6 my BIL is trying to do the same crap with planning a May wedding and they’re about the same age. They’ve been together for 6 months now. Like calm the heck down. And they want DD and DH in the wedding. In MAY. When I’m due. Hahahaha NO. Not driving to Texas for that shit with a newborn.
Also, maybe a second UO, but i think some of the “rules” regarding things are outdated. I would love for someone to straight up put what their kid likes on the invite. It takes the stress off of me.
We also do books over toys. Toys die in the basket that I have for them but we read books all day every day.
And to continue to be long winded, DD is sick and so my mom won’t let me come see her because I’m still on antibiotics. So my mama heart is hurting bad today.
@charlestonchew i think planning and obsessing over a first birthday that day in advance is weird. I'm not opposed to a wish list anymore. I used to be, but i freaking hate wandering the aisles and trying to figure out what the f to get for kids. Just tell me what the kid would like!!! Also, i hate some of the toys my kids get and I'd often rather get a say.
As far as the wedding on your first anniversary, unless you are very close relatives, all dates are fair game in my opinion. There are too many people to accommodate for weddings.
For the siblings planning to get married in May, don't sweat it. Tell them you're sad you won't be able to attend and then see if they even get a venue.
@gildah, i also don't post pics of events. We keep them on the smaller side. We only invite people our kids care about and know (after DD1 had a hard time at her 2nd bday). There are people who are closer to me and DH who our kids don't really know. They think they should be invited to things and some invite us to their kids' bdays. We just don't post and don't discuss it.
@ivyvines6 Why do they need to get married so quickly? At that young of an age, I’d want a long engagement.
Umm culturally it’s normal range here? (I was an old lady at 28 lol) I don’t like it, and I think they should wait, but I’ve “let yankees cloud my senses” as my mother would say. My parents got married at 20/22 and they don’t see what the big deal is. Also pressure from their church because it doesn’t look good for two members of the opposite sex to live under the same roof.
@ivyvines6 I wasn't scandalized by the age as it is very common here as well but a 5 month engagement sounds horrible. I got engaged at 19 and had a 2 year engagement to be able to plan in peace. But I've learned very well by now you can't change people's minds.
I had a four month engagement! I don’t see the point in waiting forever (unless finances are the problem). Started dating mid-November, I proposed end of March and we were married on August 5th. It was a small wedding though. 40 guests, just appetizers and no dancing haha. We had to be at the airport for our honeymoon that same night so it was all quick.
My BIL and his fiancé were engaged last New Year’s Eve and won’t be getting married until next September. They’ve been together for 6 years already. I understand their position though because they’re going to have a big wedding and I’m pretty sure they’re paying for it themselves.
@lincbeesmom I waited because I didn't want to be stressed and rushed. I was planning a wedding while attending college full time at nights and working full time during the day. I needed to take my time. Finances weren't the issue. I did like the idea of being done with college before the actual wedding day so that played a part as well and our wedding was 2 months after my graduation.
I’ve got no judgement for getting married at a certain age at all actually. I just know them both personally and know that they are both extremely immature and not in a position to be “adults” yet. I’m talking shit about it here, but I would never tel them how I really feel about it because it would just be shitty on my part. Underneath my disapproval, I’m hoping they’ll use this as a catalyst to mature, and also that they’ll both be extremely happy.
Oh my gosh! Old lady at 28?? I was 33 when I got married and my husband was 36. I’m ancient then! Lol. We were together 4 years before we got married, engaged 1.5 of that. We loved together for a little before getting engaged too and my very strict father didn’t see eye to eye with it, but we were adults and I didn’t really care. It just took us a while to find each other, but I’m glad that we did.
My cousin dated her husband for 5 months, got engaged and got married 6 months later. I guess when you know, you know.
We got married when I was 22 and he was 24. We were engaged for a year. I can’t imagine planning a wedding in 5 months! Of course, I’m a first generation American, so all my overseas relatives needed a good heads up to plan their trips.
I was 36! when I got married. My husband moved in with me 3 weeks after we met but we didn't get married for another 4 years. You learn a lot about someone by living with them. I decided to keep him.
We were pretty old by our cultural standards, but it helped that our parents were not sweating it at all. We were only engaged 5 months, but it was a very small wedding.
I do think the choice not to live together/have sex was a huge determining factor, but we knew it was right. We were friends from December to September, dating seriously for about 6 weeks, decided to get married in October, and got the ring on December 23rd. We were sure we wanted to get married and no amount of time would change that, so we went ahead and did it. However, we did not expect anyone outside parents to come.
Jana Lynn
Happily married since 5/24/2015 Momma of a baby Viking since 4/16, expecting #2 in 5/18
I know age doesn't matter, but you grow so much between your 20s and 30s and so on. I hope you just grow together. I also can't imagine getting married and not be financially stable on my own. We met freshman year of college and married at 25 and had 6 years of dating and 2 years of living together after we had stable jobs. He's my lobster that I want to throw in a pot of boiling water sometimes
DH and I started dating freshman year of college and then got married about 6 weeks after I graduated (He never finished.) But we were engaged for about a year and a half because of school/money/wanted to grow up a little bit more. We were 22 when we said I do. But I agree with @cups4 your 20s can be so much change. Its sort of crappy to plan such a big event, even if its on the small scale at a time of an immediate family member's big life event. Sorry @ivyvines6 sounds like an awkward family situation. But I feel ya on family that stresses you out. My MIL got engaged after dating two weeks and then married three weeks later. She also said when you know you just know. But she said the same thing about her previous husband too. And a few other serious boyfriends that I've met. But again, I don't believe in soul mates or love at first sight... I just think it's a matter of choice and commitment. There has to be some chemistry and stuff I guess. It certainly helps in the bedroom if you're attracted!.
@Poppy0419, I'm so excited for you! Here's hoping for a super boring rest of your pregnancy!!
As for marriage and age, I think age isn't a huge deal. I tend to worry about younger people getting married but that's only because I know I'm a lot different now than I was at 18 or 19. To each their own though. I was slightly offended (and still get a little peeved when I think back to it) when my cousin, who is 3 years younger than me but got married the same year as me asked when I would be having a baby (right after our weddings). When DH and I got married we wanted to wait to be more financially stable before having kids. I said we'd be waiting awhile and she said, "You're going to have a baby before you're 30 though, right?!" DS was born when I was 30 and this one will be born right after I turn 33. I think it's the perfect age for DH and I. DON'T JUDGE ME!
Hope everyone who celebrated had a fun day! We scaled back the craziness of going from house to house and it was great. Also, DS was hilarious. My cousin got her wisdom teeth out a few days ago and is very swollen. DS saw her and asked her “what happened to your cheeks?” It’s was pretty cute and funny. Also, another cousin was with his girlfriend’s family because he was proposing and they called all of us to tell us. So excited for another family wedding in 2019!
Also, we have a tradition in our family that when one of the cousins turns 21, we all go to Vegas together to celebrate. I was stoked to hear that my youngest cousin who is turning 21 in June wants to wait to do her trip until December, mostly so DH and I can go since the baby won’t be so little.
DH's 40th bday is next week. Today we are going for the anatomy scan. My parents are taking the girls. After the scan, we're going to NYC (we live in the burbs). I told DH we're going you see what Broadway show we can get tickets to, but his mom already got is lion King tickets as his gift. We're spending the night too. Can't wait but hope i can stay awake!
@mileswithmyles That’s so sweet of your cousin to postpone her party for you guys! Sounds like you have a great extended family! Congrats to your other cousin on the engagement! @nanifrog Happy birthday to DH, and have fun!! I hope you don’t fall asleep too! I always worry about late night shows when I’m pregnant. I fall asleep around 9:00 nowadays! I had the Christmas of my dreams y’all. Gorgeous church service, the kids were so happy with their gifts, and I got to host this year, which I love!
PSA- Destination Maternity has an extra 40% off their sales today! I ordered some stuff for super cheap- and if it doesn't fit free returns! I have a hard time finding jeans and the sale made the fancy ones pretty reasonable.
I have the book and did it last year (it was super helpful) but there are also free printables available on Jan.1st if you don't have/want the book. The challenge begins Jan. 6th and you have the entire week get through the listed room/space, then the next week it moves on to a new space until you're through everything. It walks you through how to organize everything including tips.
If anyone wants to do it with me, let me know and I can create a seperate thread!
Re: Weekly Randoms- 12/18
I had a friend straight up tell me I couldn’t come to their wedding but I was invited to the reception a few months after. Needless to say, I didn’t go. I was the only one in our tight knit group that was told to not come to the wedding. I’m STILL not over it.
@ivyvines6 my BIL is trying to do the same crap with planning a May wedding and they’re about the same age. They’ve been together for 6 months now. Like calm the heck down. And they want DD and DH in the wedding. In MAY. When I’m due. Hahahaha NO. Not driving to Texas for that shit with a newborn.
Also, maybe a second UO, but i think some of the “rules” regarding things are outdated. I would love for someone to straight up put what their kid likes on the invite. It takes the stress off of me.
We also do books over toys. Toys die in the basket that I have for them but we read books all day every day.
And to continue to be long winded, DD is sick and so my mom won’t let me come see her because I’m still on antibiotics. So my mama heart is hurting bad today.
As far as the wedding on your first anniversary, unless you are very close relatives, all dates are fair game in my opinion. There are too many people to accommodate for weddings.
For the siblings planning to get married in May, don't sweat it. Tell them you're sad you won't be able to attend and then see if they even get a venue.
@gildah, i also don't post pics of events. We keep them on the smaller side. We only invite people our kids care about and know (after DD1 had a hard time at her 2nd bday). There are people who are closer to me and DH who our kids don't really know. They think they should be invited to things and some invite us to their kids' bdays. We just don't post and don't discuss it.
My BIL and his fiancé were engaged last New Year’s Eve and won’t be getting married until next September. They’ve been together for 6 years already. I understand their position though because they’re going to have a big wedding and I’m pretty sure they’re paying for it themselves.
Oh my gosh! Old lady at 28?? I was 33 when I got married and my husband was 36. I’m ancient then! Lol. We were together 4 years before we got married, engaged 1.5 of that. We loved together for a little before getting engaged too and my very strict father didn’t see eye to eye with it, but we were adults and I didn’t really care. It just took us a while to find each other, but I’m glad that we did.
My cousin dated her husband for 5 months, got engaged and got married 6 months later. I guess when you know, you know.
I do think the choice not to live together/have sex was a huge determining factor, but we knew it was right. We were friends from December to September, dating seriously for about 6 weeks, decided to get married in October, and got the ring on December 23rd. We were sure we wanted to get married and no amount of time would change that, so we went ahead and did it. However, we did not expect anyone outside parents to come.
Merry Christmas everyone!!!
Its sort of crappy to plan such a big event, even if its on the small scale at a time of an immediate family member's big life event. Sorry @ivyvines6 sounds like an awkward family situation. But I feel ya on family that stresses you out. My MIL got engaged after dating two weeks and then married three weeks later. She also said when you know you just know. But she said the same thing about her previous husband too. And a few other serious boyfriends that I've met. But again, I don't believe in soul mates or love at first sight... I just think it's a matter of choice and commitment. There has to be some chemistry and stuff I guess. It certainly helps in the bedroom if you're attracted!.
As for marriage and age, I think age isn't a huge deal. I tend to worry about younger people getting married but that's only because I know I'm a lot different now than I was at 18 or 19. To each their own though. I was slightly offended (and still get a little peeved when I think back to it) when my cousin, who is 3 years younger than me but got married the same year as me asked when I would be having a baby (right after our weddings). When DH and I got married we wanted to wait to be more financially stable before having kids. I said we'd be waiting awhile and she said, "You're going to have a baby before you're 30 though, right?!" DS was born when I was 30 and this one will be born right after I turn 33. I think it's the perfect age for DH and I. DON'T JUDGE ME!
house to house and it was great. Also, DS was hilarious. My cousin got her wisdom teeth out a few days ago and is very swollen. DS saw her and asked her “what happened to your cheeks?” It’s was pretty cute and funny. Also, another cousin was with his girlfriend’s family because he was proposing and they called all of us to tell us. So excited for another family wedding in 2019!
Also, we have a tradition in our family that when one of the cousins turns 21, we all go to Vegas together to celebrate. I was stoked to hear that my youngest cousin who is turning 21 in June wants to wait to do her trip until December, mostly so DH and I can go since the baby won’t be so little.
DH's 40th bday is next week. Today we are going for the anatomy scan. My parents are taking the girls. After the scan, we're going to NYC (we live in the burbs). I told DH we're going you see what Broadway show we can get tickets to, but his mom already got is lion King tickets as his gift. We're spending the night too. Can't wait but hope i can stay awake!
great extended family! Congrats to your other cousin on the engagement!
@nanifrog Happy birthday to DH, and have fun!! I hope you don’t fall asleep too! I always worry about late night shows when I’m pregnant. I fall asleep around 9:00 nowadays!
I had the Christmas of my dreams y’all. Gorgeous church service, the kids were so happy with their gifts, and I got to host this year, which I love!
The show starts at 7pm so i can't even complain about it being late! But I also want to stay awake too enjoy the hotel.
For those of you that are looking to organize your house, I am planning to do the same as we recently moved and everything is a disaster.
I'll be doing this awesome challenge to help get me purging, cleaning and organizing one room a week:
https://www.abowlfulloflemons.net/2017/12/coming-soon-the-2018-home-organization-challenge.html
I have the book and did it last year (it was super helpful) but there are also free printables available on Jan.1st if you don't have/want the book.
The challenge begins Jan. 6th and you have the entire week get through the listed room/space, then the next week it moves on to a new space until you're through everything. It walks you through how to organize everything including tips.
If anyone wants to do it with me, let me know and I can create a seperate thread!